A/N: Thanks a LOT June Bug and LittleRalphyBabyGiraffe, your support truly means a lot :) You're amazing. I hope I didn't scare away the rest of you, you're making me a bit worried...
Hope you'll enjoy this new chapter
"Barry, you're the one who took it, right after the attack."
That simple sentence knocked the wind out of the hero. It couldn't be. It wasn't enough that he was being haunted in his dreams or seeing eerie visions, he also had to lose part of his memories even if he didn't recall experiencing a loss of time recently. For the first time since this whole ordeal started, Barry allowed the most important question of all to make his way into his mind; was he going crazy?
No, he wasn't. There was a perfectly reasonable explanation for all of this. There had to be.
But if that was a certainty, why was there an uneasy feeling growing in his stomach? Taking a moment to regain his composure the hero buried his head in his hands while feeling the soothing massaging gestures of his wife on his shoulders. Allowing his shoulders to slump forward slightly, he barely felt the way his nails scratched his forehead almost hard enough to pierce the skin.
"Are you okay?" Gently asked Iris after his silence extended for longer than a few seconds.
"What's wrong with me?" Asked his muffled voice still hidden behind his hands.
"It's going to be alright; we'll figure out a solution, together." Iris promised, not seeing the nods of approval all around her. "You need to rest and while you do, the rest of us we'll take care of that shadow. He's not going to hurt you anymore."
"Don't worry, Barry, we'll beat this thing, and everything will be fine, just like always," added Caitlin as Barry was lowering his hands.
Moving away, the hero broke the physical contact with his wife and started walking toward the exit of the room, but stopped after a few minutes and quickly, but softly, requested; "just give me a minute."
The instant his sentence was over, he continued walking under the worried glances of his whole team and brushed his daughter's shoulder as he passed by her before leaving the room. He wasn't sure if anyone even heard his voice over the sound of his rapid steps rushing out, but he couldn't care less. Barry just needed a moment to gather his thoughts and figure out his next move. Why did he feel like hunting down the shadow wasn't the answer they were looking for? Was that thing the real source of the problem? Was the Flash losing his mind?
Dragging his feet on the ground, Barry turned the corner of the hallway just before a refreshing breeze brushed his face. The hero's heartbeat instantly picked up the pace, and his feet made a complete halt. Was that….? A murmur in the distance partly answered the man's question; he could feel it. He could sense him and, after his widely opened eyes darted all over the beige walls for an instant, Barry suddenly mysteriously knew where to go next.
Like he was also losing the ability to control his mobility, his limbs went back into action, and his long legs advanced toward the closest room; Cisco's lab.
"Cisco?" He asked, gasping and carefully taking a quick peek inside the room.
Washed over by conflicting emotions, the CSI simultaneously felt his chest clenching and his throat closing, two actions that considerably diminished the quantity of oxygen allowed to enter and leave his tensed body in desperate need of an answer. It was with his heart hammering in his constricted chest that Barry's eyes moved to start scanning the entire room.
It was empty. There wasn't a single soul in sight. As he was struggling between disappointment and relief, the hero's lungs released all the air that had been forcibly kept inside before deeply inhaling again. What was he expecting? To see his friend alive and well?
Or did he think he was going to see Vibe's ghost again, a question that would only accelerate the collapse of his sanity?
While sighing deeply, the speedster walked straight to the closest chair, the one behind Cisco's computer, and let his body slumped forward with his forearms on the desk and his glance looking at his reflection in the computer screen. Barry's green eyes squinted to observe a little closer the stranger who was staring right back at him with pale skin and large and pronounced dark circles under his eyes. Between that and his claims about his deceased friend, no wonder his loved ones were so worried about him.
It was probably best to take one step back here and think; Barry was a scientist, and one living in a city where the impossible became their new normal just under five years ago. So, it was logical to conclude there was a rational explanation to all of this, right? The Scarlet Speedster was exhausted and grieving; two elements that could, theoretically, lead to hallucinations. That was, of course, mostly happening in the case of extreme sleep deprivation or rare grieving episodes. But both these theories were undoubtedly better and more likely than the ghost one.
Or, was it – considering how they fought a magical, immortal, Egyptian priest just a few years ago?
A loud gasp escaped the man's lips when a ghostly form suddenly reflected into the monitor's black screen. The apparition that seemingly appeared just behind the young hero who was wearing a beige jacket and jeans wasn't the mysterious shadow; it was Vibe. The dead hero was still wearing the same clothes he did when he died, and he was looking directly at his speedster's friend.
"Cisco?" Hesitantly asked the speedster, his entire body suddenly wholly paralysed in fear that every movement was going to cause Vibe to disappear again into thin air.
The only thing Barry dared to do was to glue his eye on the reflection and hold his breath, once more, despite his brain's protests. Any noise, any movement, could cause this mirage to go away, a fear that only grew stronger when Cisco's image flickered for an instant before becoming seemingly solid. This thing, whatever it was, looked so real now.
The deceased hero's lips started moving slowly, but no sound came out for a moment, a moment that lasted long enough for Barry to start believing he wasn't going to hear his friend's voice this time around. Then, gradually, Cisco's facial movements transformed into spoken words;
"-ry, don't give up on me, now. You can't," stated the vision with unmistakably emotion shaking every syllable.
Then, a new sound came to Barry's ears: footsteps, very quickly approaching ones.
Swiftly, Barry wiped away the water building up in his eyes and made a full 180 degrees turn on his chair. Then, as he jumped to his feet, he cursed under his breath when he realized that Cisco was gone, again. Barry clenched his fists and took a deep breath to control the rising anger that was mixing with the deception; who just interrupted the session and chased his friend away? He was so close to making a connection.
What if Cisco was really a ghost who just needed to pass one last message along before moving on? Maybe Barry shouldn't be encouraging his visions, as he still had no clue if they were reals or not, but he couldn't help himself. He needed to know what the ghost wanted.
A new voice brought him out of his thoughts and back to reality:
"Rookie? Are you in there?"
Ralph. Of course. Seconds later, the Elongated Man appeared at the entrance of the room. To be more precise, at first, he only passed right by the place without stopping, but he moved back a few seconds later to make sure he really saw his friend in that room. Once he managed to confirm Barry's whereabouts, he smiled and entered the lab.
"There you are, I've been searching for you," said the P.I. who approached the speedster with his hands inside the pockets of his blue suit.
The relaxed expression on Ralph's face somehow managed to annoy Barry more than it should and more than he wanted to admit it.
"Are you okay?" Asked Ralph.
"Am I..." Barry sighed and slightly shook his head, feeling the rising frustration. "why do I feel like I'm the only one still grieving him?" he asked, raising his voice, "why are you guys all seem fine with what happened already? He's been gone for barely a week!"
"Rookie..." slowly said Ralph while taking his hands out of his pockets, clearly taken off guard by the sudden outburst.
"Why am I the only person who really seems to care about what happened?" Questioned Barry. The exhaustion and mental stress of the last week sure did a great job to decrease his patience and rise his irritability exponentially.
Sighing, Ralph lost his half smile and his features saddened. "I miss him too, you know. We all do, it's just-"
Moving around his interlocutor, Elongated Man gestured in the air while searching for the right words before turning back to face Flash again, "I regret what happened, I regret I wasn't there when it happened. I should've been there. I should've stopped it. I feel like if I give in to these feelings, they'll never stop coming out," he admitted.
The man's confession managed to calm down Barry's emotions, as the hero exhaled. What was he thinking? It wasn't like him to snap like that; it seemed he genuinely needed a lot of rest. And, as Ralph told him a few weeks before Devoe took over his body, he became a master in the art of hiding his feelings.
"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have implied that," he started to apologize before adding, "you can't blame yourself for what happened, there was nothing you could've done."
"The same goes to you," Ralph argued back as he moved closer to his best friend with sadness all over his face. "Look, right now, we know how hard you're taking all of this. We're just trying to be strong for you."
Slowly, Barry brought his head to his forehead and massaged it, grateful for the way the motion was also hiding his face from the other superhero. Of course, why didn't he think of that? His team was always going to try and protect him the same way he was protecting them. Between that and his earlier admission of seeing Cisco's ghost in the cortex, chances of his team taking him seriously now weren't very high.
"Listen, Rookie," continued Ralph after a moment, "until this shadow is taken care of, it's probably best if you stay here, in the lab so that we can protect you. At least, until your powers are back to normal."
Barry chuckled; talk about a reverse of fortune. A few months ago, he was the one offering the buddy system to the Elongated Man and inviting him to stay downstairs to keep him safe from Devoe. Now here Barry was, being the one person their new enemy was trying to harm and being the one needing protection. What happened to the days where he was a hero and the one protecting other people? That time felt so far away, way farther away than a week.
"Don't really have a choice, do I?" He asked, with the corner of his lips twitching in the first indication of a smile of this whole conversation.
"No, no you don't," quickly answered Ralph, bringing back his playful smile to his face. "We're going to keep you safe, don't worry. Just try to relax. Don't fight; we'll get through this."
Barry nodded, grateful, "thanks man, I'll do my best-"
The hero stopped mid-sentence as the words died in his throat. What was he going to say? What was he going to do? Stop fighting? For some reason, it sounded wrong, it seemed like just another word for giving up, and that wasn't in his hero's genes. But it was also possible he was just becoming paranoid; his friends were trying to help him. What if the answer was there and was this simple? What if all he needed to go was to stop struggling against his guilt and let go of everything to get better?
"No problem, Rookie," said the P.I. who didn't notice the hesitation at the end of the speedster's sentence, before swiftly adding, "you should be with your family, they're really concerned about you."
"I'll go see them," promised the hero, "just give me a minute."
"Alright, take care of yourself," gently requested Ralph before starting to walk in the direction of the exit.
Left on his own, Barry took the time to carefully listen to the silence while holding his breath and waiting, waiting for his friend to come back. Except, whatever it was that he thought he felt or saw earlier, it was gone now, so the CSI sighed deeply. It probably was his imagination playing tricks on him.
Unless, maybe, it wasn't just in his head.
The following morning, when Barry opened his eyes in his new temporary quarter in the lab, it was to sense that something was wrong. As he was staring at the ceiling, he started feeling again that same eerie sensation that had been haunting him and which was accompanied by that familiar shiver cruising down his spine. Tensing up, he turned his head on his right to get a good look at his wife and relaxed just a tad; Iris was still soundly sleeping next to him, undisturbed by the strange energy surrounding them. The couple spent the whole night downstairs, where Barry could rest while staying under the protection of his friends. The room in which the hero and the reporter had been sleeping in also happened to be where Jesse and Harry stayed when they came back from rescuing the young girl from Zoom's grasp years ago.
While he was still staring straight at Iris, Barry could've sworn he saw something passing fast in the open entrance leading into the hallway. Which one of the recent apparitions was it? Was the shadow coming back or was it something, or someone, else?
Needing to know, Barry silently stretched himself and moved the thin sheet from over his legs before gently depositing his bare feet on the cold ground. The S.T.A.R. labs' beds weren't the most comfortable, by far, by at least the facility's floor wasn't creaking under his weight like it would at home. After one last look back, to ensure his wife was still sleeping, the speedster walked toward the entrance, slowly and carefully. Should he call for backup? Or, should he grab his suit? No. If that were the shadow coming back for vengeance, he would've felt the pain already. And, even if he were to change from his black t-shirt and grey leggings to his suit, it wouldn't prevent him from being paralysed by his enemy.
According to the watch Barry was wearing, it was only 5 am, meaning he just slept for a few hours, and yet, he wasn't feeling tired. But that probably was because of the adrenaline in his veins. So, should he go right or left in the hallway? After looking on both sides, Barry made a choice to follow his instinct and turned left, which was the direction that was leading almost immediately into another turn. The moment he started taking that fast approaching turn, a voice startled him.
"Barry," called out Cisco's voice.
Swiftly turning around, with his heart hammering in his chest, Barry found himself once again face to face with his deceased best friend, who was barely standing a few feet in front of him. He could almost reach out and touch him, but Barry didn't dare to take such actions in fear of making Vibe disappear.
"Cisco," he breathed out, unable to find any other word to say.
For a few anxious seconds, all the hero did was stare back at his friend before finally swallowing his saliva, and anxiety, and speaking up again:
"Why are you here? Why are you haunting me?" He inquired, struggling to control his shaking voice.
The silence was the only answer he got.
"Is it because I didn't save you? I'm sorry, Cisco, I tried. I truly did," tried the speedster again, "what is i-" Upon seeing his friend's lips finally moving and Vibe's opening his mouth, Barry swiftly forced himself to stop making any sound, as he needed to hear and comprehend every word.
"You can't give up on me," said the dead breacher to his confused friend.
"I… I don-" Suddenly, Barry's eyes widened. Oh God, could it be…? Where there wasn't any a moment ago, doubt and hope started to manifest.
"Cisco, are you still alive? Are you trapped, somewhere? Are you trying to vibe me a message?" He asked under his breath.
"Don't give up, man, keep fighting," added Cisco instead of directly answering to the interrogations.
As he was speaking, Cisco's gaze moved just a tad to the right, a movement that forced the speedster to manoeuvre his head to correct the shift in position and keep the eye contact.
"I am fighting; I'm not giving up on you. Just, please, tell me where you are. I'll come to get you, I'll save you," insisted Barry, stepping his right foot in front of him and extending his arm to grab his friend.
Or, try to grab him was more accurate as his hand passed right through.
"Tell me how I can save you, please!" Insisted the speedster again, feeling his anxiety rising to the roof as his friend's image started fluctuating before starting to dissipate. No no no!
"I need to know where you are, don't go!" Pleaded Barry just before the voice that manifested behind him almost made him jump out of his skin.
"Dad? Who are you talking to?" Asked Nora's voice behind him, causing the father to turn around and look at her daughter with his lips parted.
A/N: Let me know what you thought. Do you guys want more?