A/N: You guys are the best! Thanks for sticking with me here.

Disclaimer: Castle is not mine.

At the End of the Tunnel

Chapter 4

"Mommy?"

Kate heard her little boy's voice and turned around, finding him at the doorway. She was getting ready to go out and look at some apartments she had seen online. Jake was supposed to watch the kids for the day so she had texted Rick earlier, saying she could pick him up around 11 if he was still up for a little apartment hunt. He had responded immediately, making her smile when he said he couldn't wait, ending the message with a ridiculous smiley face. The kiss they had shared the day before was still constantly in her mind, making her lose her train of thought whenever she remembered how his lips had felt like brushing against hers, his hands pulling her closer.

She knew she shouldn't be thinking about that. It had been a mistake. A delicious mistake, yes, but it was still wrong. She had been lost in thought, standing in front of the floor length mirror in her bedroom, when Alex brought her back to reality.

"Hey, baby bear. Come here." She smiled at him and beckoned him to come closer. His hair was messy and he was holding onto Mr. Chuckles, his frazzled stuffed panda that had definitely seen better days. Alex made his way to her, his little hand brushing his dark brown hair away from his eyes before he stopped next to her and leaned against her leg.

"Are you going out, mommy?" He asked quietly and she crouched down to his level, brushing a stubborn strand of his hair that insisted in keep falling over his eyes. "You look pretty." He touched her hair and she grinned, leaning in to give him an eskimo kiss.

"You look very handsome yourself, Mr. Alex." She told him and kissed his nose, making him giggle. "What were you doing just now? Cartoons?" She picked him up and held him to her side, his little legs wrapped around her hips, turning back to the mirror for one last look. He shook his head and leaned against her shoulder.

"Livie wanted to watch her cartoons." He pouted and Kate had to fight the urge to roll her eyes. This was recurring argument between her two children.

"Why don't you watch them with her, silly?" She bumped her forehead on his playfully.

"She's watching Cinderella again." Alex scrunched up his nose in mock disgust and Kate laughed.

"Well, you guys are going to have to learn to share that TV." She told him and he crossed his arms over his chest in protest. "Alex, we've already talked about this." She sighed and left the room, still holding him close.

"Where are you going?" He asked her, effectively changing the subject. Kate rolled her eyes – he always did that whenever she started telling him off – and kissed his temple.

"I'm meeting a friend."

"Are we coming with you?"

"No, baby bear. Daddy's staying with you guys today. Maybe he can take you to the park later, how's that?" She suggested, but he frowned, confusion etched on his young features.

"But daddy is going out. He said he has to go to work." He explained and Kate looked at him surprised.

She could still hear Jake in the bathroom, but she had just assumed he was taking a shower to maybe take the kids out. He barely spent any time at their apartment these days and yesterday had been a rare night that he had actually been home. Everything tended to be so awkward between them now that sleeping in the same bed had become a chore. After the kids had been put to bed, he had camped out on the couch in the living room. Kate couldn't say she had been disappointed. The less time they spent together, the better.

"What do you mean, he's going out?" She exclaimed and Alex shrugged. "Why don't you go watch TV with your sister for a little while? I'll be right back, okay?" She kissed his nose again and put him down. Once he was out of sight, she stalked over to the bathroom, and opened the door without even bothering to knock. "What the hell, Jake?"

He jumped, startled, and turned to look at her surprised.

"Hey, a little privacy here." He protested, but she ignored him, entering the bathroom and closing the door behind her.

"I thought we had an agreement." She hissed, but he just looked at her blankly. "You were supposed to stay with the kids today, remember? You told me you would last night."

"Yeah, well, something came up at work. You know how that is." He countered coldly.

"That's not fair. We both have demanding jobs; you cannot just pin this one on me." She closed her eyes for a moment and took a deep, calming breath. "You should've told me."

"I thought you were staying home." He shrugged and turned back to the mirror, brushing the towel over his cheeks; it looked like he had just shaved. Once upon a time, she would be all over him after this, but not anymore.

"I told you I had plans." She said through gritted teeth.

"Not my problem, babe." He turned back to her. "Why don't you take them with you?" He suggested with a smirk and Kate had to control herself not to punch it off his pretty face.

"I don't have any choice now, do I?" She opened the door and stepped out of the bathroom, stopping herself after a moment. "By the way, you're getting the divorce papers sometime next week." She told him over her shoulder and when she met his gaze, he was looking at her with wide eyes.

"What the hell are you talking about? I thought you were just going to move out." He whispered harshly and she shrugged.

"I am."

"I don't want to get divorced, Kate." He continued, running a hand through his hair agitatedly. "Do you have any idea what that's going to do to my reputation?"

"Not my problem, is it?" She replied just as coldly as he had talked to her a couple of minutes before. "Have fun at work." She put emphasis into it, well aware that he was most likely going to meet one of his bimbos.

He never worked weekends.

"Where are we going, mom?"

Kate looked at her daughter through the rearview mirror and found her curious blue eyes staring back at her. After her fight with Jake, Kate had gotten the kids ready and they were soon on their way to Rick's. She had texted him saying she was going to be a few minutes late, but that she would be there soon. She really hoped he wouldn't mind that she had brought the kids along. In a way, she felt a little like hypocrite; here she was, on her way to meet a guy and she had been complaining about Jake going to see his bimbos. Granted, she and Rick were friends (even though she could not stop thinking about that kiss) and Jake had admitted to cheating on her for months when Olivia was a baby, then again after Alex was born. He had even confessed to having an on and off affair now.

So, yeah, maybe she shouldn't feel that bad.

"Remember I told you we were going to move soon?" She stopped at a red light and held her daughter's gaze through the mirror, her heart clenching when she saw a hint of sadness cloud her eyes.

"Yeah." The girl nodded and rested her head back on the seat, resigned.

"Well, we're going to visit a few apartments today. See if we can find our new home." She smiled at the girl and sighed when Olivia bit her lip in thought.

"We're gonna move, mommy? What does that mean?" Alex asked curiously from his seat.

"It means we're going to live in a different apartment, baby bear." She told him and turned her attention back to traffic when the light turned green. She stole a glance at her little girl and found her still worrying her bottom lip, brows furrowed in concentration.

"Can we help choose the new place, mom?" Olivia asked after a few minutes and Kate was relieved to see that most of that sadness she had seen before was gone.

"Of course you can, Liv. It's going to be your home too, right? It's only fair that you guys have a say in it." She reassured her daughter and smiled when Olivia grinned.

"Can I still have my own room?"

"I want my own room too!" Alex immediately chimed in and Kate chuckled.

"We'll see, guys." She told them and parked in front of Rick's building. He was already waiting outside and jogged to the car when he spotted them, his eyes widening momentarily when he saw the kids. Opening the door, he quickly slipped inside and gave her a soft smile. "Hi." She smiled at him and watched as he started to move towards her to probably give her a quick kiss hello on the cheek, but decided against it at the last second.

"Hi." He greeted her and lifted his eyebrows in question. "I see we have company." He turned around to smile at the kids, who were watching their interaction curiously. "Hi, guys." He waved at them and Kate sighed in relief when both Olivia and Alex waved back with friendly smiles.

"Guys, this is my friend Rick Castle." She turned around to look at the kids. "Rick, this is Olivia and the little guy here is Alex."

"Nice to meet you, Mr. Castle." Olivia said nicely and Kate felt her heart soar with pride for her little girl. Never would she have thought that one day she would be introducing her children to her favorite author.

Then again, she had never thought she would make out with her favorite author either.

"Yeah, nice to meet you, Mr. Castle." Alex copied his sister with a happy grin and Rick chuckled.

"Nice to meet you too. Both of you." He replied and turned to Kate for support. "And you can call me Rick. Mr. Castle makes me feel old." He continued with a grin when Kate nodded at him.

"Are you going to look at apartments with us? Olivia asked and he nodded. "Okay, cool." She smiled and turned to the window.

"Rick?" He heard Alex's voice and turned to the boy. "Do you like ice cream?" He asked seriously and Rick felt like this was a really important question. Turning to Kate, he found her biting her lip to keep from laughing.

"I love ice cream, buddy." He replied and Alex nodded. "What's your favorite?"

"Chocolate chip cookie." He answered immediately and Rick laughed quietly. "Mommy, can we get ice cream later? Please? Pretty please?" Kate looked at him through the rearview mirror and narrowed her eyes at his puppy dog look.

"I'll think about it, mister."

"I promise I'll be really good, mommy." Alex vowed seriously and Kate laughed.

"Yeah, you'd just better." She shook her head and turned to Rick when they stopped at a red light. "Thanks for coming today." She gave him a smile and he returned it in kind, reaching out to touch her arm gently.

"My pleasure, Kate. Everything okay?" He asked quietly and she sighed. "What is it?"

"I'll tell you later." She turned her attention back to traffic, but when she looked at him again, she found him watching her, a hint of concern in his eyes. "I'm fine, Rick. Don't worry." She reassured him and saw him reach out to her again, but catching himself before his hand touched hers.

Maybe the kids coming today was a good thing. At least it would keep them from making another mistake.

Hours later, they decided to stop by a park near Rick's loft. The kids were tired, but Kate figured that they deserved to play for a little while after being so good today. They had gone to five different apartments, but none of them had felt right to her. There was one in TriBeCa that had caught her eye (and it had an amazing view), but it was a little too expensive for her budget, so she told the real estate agent she would think about it. After the fifth apartment, she was exhausted, so Rick suggested they could maybe go to the park, sit down for a bit while the kids played.

So that's where they were now. Alex was climbing the monkey bars while Olivia played on the swings. Kate and Rick sat on a bench where she could see both her kids and allowed herself to relax for a few minutes. Involuntarily, she found herself leaning against his side, her arm pressed against his.

"Tired?" He whispered and she nodded, trying her hardest to fight the urge to just rest her head on his shoulder. "Is everything okay?"

"Jake is being a jackass." She sighed and shook her head. "He was supposed to stay with the kids today, but he bailed at the last minute. If it weren't for Alex telling me, I wouldn't have even known he was going out."

"So that's why they came with you today." He completed and she nodded, closing her eyes for a moment. "Well, I'm glad you brought them. They're pretty amazing, Kate." He gave her a gentle smile and Kate smiled back, feeling the butterflies going crazy in her stomach. "I miss when Alexis was this age. We had a blast back then."

"How old is she now?" She asked, realizing she had never bothered to find out.

"Sixteen." He sighed. "Guess what I found out last night."

"What?"

"She's dating." He covered his face with his hands and Kate chuckled. "My little girl, Kate. She already has a boyfriend. That's not right." He groaned and Kate patted his knee comfortingly.

"Well, she's growing up. It's normal. I had my first boyfriend when I was fourteen. I was so in love. Or at least I thought I was at the time." She laughed quietly to herself. "Ethan Spencer. I haven't seen him in years. I wonder what happened to him." She mused to herself and shook her head, only to find him watching her. "Bottom line is, this is probably her first love, you know? She must be over the moon." She shrugged. "And she's a good kid, right?"

"The best." His arm had somehow made its way behind her, over the top of the bench, and she could feel its warmth as leaned back against it.

"So there you go. Don't worry so much." She nudged his side playfully and leaned a little against him. They were quiet for a couple of minutes, watching the kids play, enthralled in their own little worlds. "I told Jake about the divorce papers." She said quietly after a while and felt his hand touch her arm gently.

"How'd he take it?" He whispered, running the tip of his fingers slowly up and down her arm.

"Not well." She let out a sigh. "Said he doesn't want a divorce, that it'll ruin his reputation." She rolled her eyes at the memory. "It was ridiculous."

Before he could say anything, they heard a cry coming from the direction of the monkey bars and Kate saw Olivia running towards her brother, who was crying on the ground. She could see a bump already forming on his forehead as she rushed to her son. When she reached them, Olivia was holding him close, whispering to him that he was going to be okay and Kate felt her chest tighten at the scene.

"Hey, baby bear, what happened?" She kneeled down to take him from her daughter's arms and nodded at the girl reassuringly when she still looked a little panicked.

"I think he bumped his head on one of the bars, mom." Olivia told her over her brother's cries. "Shhh, Alex, you're going to be okay. I promise." She tried to soothe him and Kate felt her lips tugging up slightly at her little girl's concern.

"We should get some ice on that bump." She heard Rick's voice and looked up at him. "You know, I live just a couple of blocks away. We can do that there, if you want." He offered and she looked at him unsure.

"I don't want to impose, Rick." She tried to say, but he shook his head.

"You're not imposing, Kate. Come on. Let's go take care of your boy." He smiled at her reassuringly and she sighed with a nod, standing up with Alex in her arms. His cries had decreased to little whimpers as he hugged her neck tightly, his head on her shoulder.

"Do you mind going to Rick's for a few minutes, Liv? Just to get some ice on Alex's forehead?" Kate asked her daughter, who shook her head.

"Of course not, mom. We should go make Alex better."

Once they were on their way back to her car, Rick leaned in discreetly to whisper in her ear.

"Relax. This doesn't have to mean anything." He tried to reassure her and she turned to him, finding him watching her, a myriad of feelings running through his eyes. "I promise."

"I'm not…" She started, but hesitated on what she was going to tell him. Saying she was not worried would give the wrong impression. Then again, saying she was would also give the wrong impression. God, why did this have to be so complicated? "Let's just… behave." She sighed, a chuckle escaping her lips at the ridiculousness of the situation.

"I'll be a very good boy, detective." He grinned and she could hear the teasing tone in his voice.

The problem was, she didn't know if she wanted him to be.

A/N: Thoughts?