Lately, Mike's parents agreed she needed extra curricular activities. They didn't want to get rid of their daughter, but they felt she needed to do things in school other than go, attend classes, eat lunch, and come back home on the bus. Mike tried out for the football team. First Kevin, the quarterback, laughed at the idea, but once Mike was faster than half the boys and could get tackled without crying or breaking a nail, the coach accepted her. Right now, Nazz, Jimmy, and Sarah were practicing their cheerleading routine while Mike and the other boys were on field.

"Alright you maggots, listen up," Kevin gathered himself, Mike, Rolf, Ed, Double D, Jonny and Plank, growing angry and ready to tackle on their assignment. "Tonight, we're playing against our rival school, the Lemon Brook Lumpers. We need to crush 'em with our defense and dominate 'em with our offense," he then glared at the blue-haired boy. "Got it?"

"Rolf knows of this offense!" the boy spoke up. "As Nana has the body odor of a well-fermented yak!"

Kevin blinked at him, then turned. "Mike, gimme that pigskin!" Mike threw it to him, nearly slamming his stomach and making him fall. "Whoa, easy! This ain't no big city football!"

"Sorry, Kevin." Mike smirked deviously.

"Anyway, watch and learn," Kevin told the other boys, then slammed into the tackling dummy. He was straining a bit, but finally conquered over it. "Killer, alright, show me what you're made of! Hustle, hustle, hustle, not you, Mavinsky."

"What's the matter?" Mike taunted with her arms crossed and had an amused smile. "' Fraid I'll show you up in front of the coach again?"

"You may be a girl, but you fight like a boy, I should be allowed to hit you, but my Dad says a real boy doesn't hurt a lady!" Kevin sneered at her.

"Good, then this should be fun!" Mike grinned, then kicked him between his legs.

Kevin grunted in pain, falling to the side. "COACH!"

The coach ate a doughnut, looking very fat for a physical education adult. "No hurting a lady, Barr, I won't wanna have to call your parents."

Kevin growled at him, but obeyed. Mike smirked, then kicked dust in his eye and watched the other boys at work. Jonny had run into the dummy and bounced off it. Rolf was simply standing there.

"Come on, Rolf, hit it!" Mike yelled out.

Rolf nodded, bending the dummy over and spanked it with a paddle.

"Do you want those Lumpers to win?" Kevin looked at the others. "Come on, ladies, hit it!"

Mike punched his arm for the 'lady' retort.

"OWW!" Kevin rubbed his arm. "Stop taking advantage of being a girl! I oughta rip those pigtails out your head right now!"

"Careful Kevin, don't break a nail." Mike turned away with her hands on her hips, having fun with being the only girl on the team. If those other boys from Lemon Brook would hurt her, she wouldn't even mind, she might even make them feel sorry they ever tried to cross her.

"The only girls on the team is them dorks!" Kevin caught a glimpse of the Ed's. "Pathetic. You dweebs don't have backbone between ya. I'm goin' to the nurse to get an ice pack." he went inside.

"Plank says 'no kiddin', Braniac!'." Jonny mocked.

Mike waved to him, then went to the Ed's. "Come on, guys, I'm a girl and I'm stronger than the three of you put together!"

"Oh, I'm sorry, Mike, but I fear my athletic skills may not be up to Kevin's standards." Double D said weakly.

Eddy threw his helmet down. "Who invented this game anyway? I'm only on this stupid team cuz this uniform makes me look like a hunk!"

Mike couldn't help but laugh a bit. Double D joined her.

"Yoo-hoo, Cobblers!" a familiar voice called. "Over here!"

"Great... Just what we needed..." Mike turned, glaring to see the Kanker sisters were harassing the team.

"Hey, Marie, do you smell something?" May asked with a goofy grin.

"Why, yes, I do, May," Marie smirked. "What stinks, Lee?"

"I'll tell ya what stinks, Marie, Peach Creek Cobblers stink!" Lee finished.

The three sisters lifted their shirts to reveal they had PEACH CREEK STINKS written on their bodies.

"KANKER BELLIES!" Ed yelled, he then ran in circles. "Begone, jelly-bellied, Jezebels!"

"I'm surprised Ed even knows how to use Jezebel in a sentence." Mike remarked.

The Kankers then started to throw trash at the football players.

"Wash-out!" Marie called.

"Losers, losers!" May called.

"Hey, we go to school with you, if you don't like it, maybe you should move away!" Mike flinched as trash was thrown at her.

"Maybe YOU should go back to where you came from, Pigtails!" Lee yelled, then awed as she noticed something. "Aw, nobody hit the bald kid..."

"Wow," Nazz went to sit with Sarah and Jimmy on the bleachers. "It's like we don't exist. How are we supposed to win the big game tonight if nobody's got any school spirit?"

"For once I agree, it's like New Jersey over here!" Mike commented.

"Mutant bellies from Hades!" Ed called, still overwhelmed from the Kanker sisters' threats. He then tripped over a discarded apple core which sent him spinning. He spun up the bleachers and slammed into the Kanker sisters and their trash can, making them fly off the bleachers and disappearing. Ed ran into a tree, catapulting him back on school grounds, making the other kids cheer, much to his confusion. "Look at me, my victory dance!" he danced on a bench. "Shake it like you've got ants in your pants! A, B, D, one, two, three, my butt's bigger than a small country! Alley-oop!" he leaped in the air and came down in a water barrel, making the other kids cheer, except for, of course, Sarah.

"Hey, Mutton-Head, your small country's sprung a leak!" Eddy pointed and laughed.

"Ed, you're perfect, dude!" Nazz beamed.

"Who? What?" Ed was lost again.

"Now that was school spirit!" Mike even clapped for Ed.

"You, silly, c'mon, I'm gonna show you something." Nazz took his hand to take him elsewhere.

"Where? Why?" Ed looked around.

After school, the Ed's were at Double D's place having dinner of spaghetti that Mr. and Mrs. Vincent left before going to endless work shifts. Mike was in the backyard, practicing for the big game tonight.

"Michelene Mavinsky, you come inside right now!" Mrs. Mavinsky called for the hundredth time about Mike coming in for dinner.

Mike sighed. "All right, all right, I'm coming, I'm coming..." she went inside to join her parents.

"There you are, young lady," Mr. Mavinsky handed her a bowl of chicken and vegetable soup. "Now, hurry up and eat this, the game's going to start soon!"

"Yes, Dad, sorry, Mom." Mike said, then quickly ate.

"So, how was football practice today?" Mrs. Mavinsky asked in excitement. "We're very thrilled to see you play tonight. I hope you don't mind, but we're going to videotape it."

"Not at all!" Mike sounded delighted about being on TV, even if it was just her parents' camera. She had finished her dinner, feeling full now and ready to take on the game.

"Come on, dear, we better get you ready!" Mrs. Mavinsky beamed.

"All right!" Mike nodded, then quickly went to the door.

Mr. and Mrs. Mavinsky saw they had enough time to make it to the game and find seats before the Lemon Brook Lumpers would show up. They drove to Peach Creek Junior High and drove to the parking lot, allowing Mike to go out and get to the locker room.

"All right, sweetie, have a good game, we'll be cheering you on." Mr. Mavinsky smiled at his little girl.

Mike nodded, then went to get in uniform. Jimmy, Sarah, and Nazz were preparing their cheers for their team while they would get ready. Mike came out and saw the away team and walked up to them, looking way up.

"Whoa..." Mike muttered at the very tall, big, and brutish players. "You guys must've been held back like five or six times!"

"Hey, beat it, girly, we're workin' here!" one of them got in her face, growling at her.

Mike shuddered and went back to the team. "These guys actually look brutal."

"They certainly appear to have superseded the standard growth chart, haven't they?" Double D was nervous.

"Whatya mean 'are you in my will', Plank?" Jonny asked his wooden sidekick.

"All Rolf sees are teensy-weensy babies." Rolf stated calmly, but his knees were shaking.

"Man, this is gonna hurt..." Eddy gulped.

The whistle blowed.

"Coin toss," Kevin put his helmet on. "Right on!"

Mike shivered, then went to join Kevin and the others on the field against the monstrous Lemon Brook Lumpers.

"You guys, I'm concerned," Double D looked around with Mike and Eddy. "Not only for my well-being, but for Ed. It's not like him to just disappear like this."

Jimmy, Sarah, and Nazz did their cheer. They even had a cardboard oven out. The oven bounced around and revealed Ed in a peach cobbler slice mascot get-up. The crowd cheered for Ed.

"That's our boy, honey!" Tim beamed to his wife.

Angela filed her nails, looking down uncaringly. "Mm..." she shrugged, not too impressed. She then beamed brightly. "Oh, there's Sarah! Hi, Honey!"

"Hi, Mommy!" Sarah called back with a bright smile.

"Yay Cobblers, go team go!" the cheerleaders cheered.

"Mascot?" Eddy looked in disbelief.

"Is that Ed?" Double D blinked.

"Whoa." Mike mumbled.

"It's a pie in the eye for Lemon Brook Junior High!" Ed cheered, then taunted the other team. "The Lumpers are bad and they ain't got no chance, so go home and wet your pants!" he kicked dirt against one of the Lemon Brook players.

"Wow, that was pretty good." Mike was impressed with Ed's cheering techniques.

"So that's why Ed's been so secretive!" Double D said, putting on his helmet. "He certainly has what it takes, don't you think, Eddy?"

"They think they're so great!" Eddy scoffed, then called to Nazz. "Hey! I should be the mascot! Don't you think? After all, I'm the life of the party! I'm the jack of all trades!"

"Focus!" Mike hit the back of Eddy's head to get his head in the game.

The coach blew his whistle, making the cheerleaders leave the field. The Lumpers were nearly trampling the field for the kickoff. Their kick made the ball go way up into the air, making the Cobblers scatter.

"It's right to ya, man!" Kevin called.

Double D had caught the ball and panicked right as the Lumpers were coming to tackle him. The Lumper got him and the ball came out of Double D's hands and went to Jonny.

"Take it in, Eddy!" Jonny called, then didn't see the pink-skinned boy. "Eddy?"

"MAN UP, EDDY!" Jessica Sampson called to her son. "DON'T BE A LOSER LIKE YOUR FATHER!"

Jonny gave the ball to Plank, making one of the Lumpers tackle on top of them.

"Double D, where's Eddy?" Mike had the ball now and was running for her dear life as a Lumper was dangerously close behind her and stopped to stand beside him.

"I don't know!" Double D said, nervously.

"LOOK OUT!" Kevin called.

Double D and Mike were plowed by two Lumbers.

"Fumble! Fumble..." Mike called weakly under the pressure.

The Kanker sisters were doing the wave while Mrs. Kanker was lighting another cigarette.

"That Cobbler mascot..." Lee started.

"...Really is..." Marie continued.

"Cute!" May finished foolishly.

Lee and Marie punched her. "Lame!"

The cheerleaders did another cheer as Eddy came out in a hammer mascot costume. "I'm the Peach Creek Clobberer! I'm the best, best guy you've seen! Forget about this old dope, he's just a has-bean!" he tried to club down Ed, but Ed's costume was tougher than anticipated.

"Nice move, Eddy!" Ed was easily impressed.

"Eddy!" Mike cried, then went to the sidelines the best she could. "Ow, ow, ow..."

"Run, Plank!" Jonny called to his wood friend.

"Eddy... What do you think you are doing?" Mike glared at the boy.

One of the Lumpers had grabbed Eddy suddenly.

"HEY!" Mike called out to him.

"Did Nazz make you a mascot too, Eddy?" Ed smiled to his friend.

The cheerleaders did their cheer for the Cobbler cannon fly, which reminded Ed to go to them.

"Looks like it's up to me..." Mike lowered her helmet, put the black paint under her eyes and looked like one tough cookie. "COME GET SOME!"

Kevin threw the ball to her. Mike caught it and glared at the Lumpers. They came for her. Somehow, Mike jumped high over them and stepped on all over them, even knocking one of their helmets on the ground, giving them a black eye and jumped back onto the ground and ran to the end zone.

"GET PIGTAILS!" one of the Lumpers called out.

Mike gulped a bit, she wasn't afraid to admit she was afraid of those guys. She kept running as they were getting very close to her. Mike had unbearable pain in her ankle, but she kept persevering to score a touchdown. She did it and even though the Peach Creek boys were hurt, Mike managed to have the team win. 62-41. Cobblers Win!

After the game, Mike was on crutches and met the team after the Lumpers were on their way back home in Lemon Brook.

"Mike, for a girl, you ain't too bad." Kevin was impressed with the girl.

"Thanks... But I think I need to take a nap... For two or three days..." Mike was aching a little.

"I can't believe we lost to those Peach Creek Crybabies..." one player said.

"Just wait til next year, Crybabies!" another one added.

"See ya there, Lemon Brook 'Bumblers'!" Mike retorted, making everyone laugh.