Chapter Four

In The Clean Rooms

Rory wakes up and sees Ianto asleep in the chair with his head resting at the foot of her bed. While her head hurts and her muscles still ache, she no longer feels neither the nausea nor the abdominal cramping.

However, her windpipe still feels a bit scratchy from inhaling the toxin, and although she doesn't want to wake Ianto, she can't contain her coughing.

Ianto sits up, completely startled. He looks around as if he doesn't know where he is. When he sees Rory, he whispers,. "Hey, you."

"Hey, yourself," she replies. "You know something?"

"What?"

"I think I feel better."

xxxx

Gwen walks into Tosh's room carrying an IV bag. Tosh smiles and says, "I'm glad it's you."

"Really?" Gwen asks. "Why?"

"I never realized that Ianto could be such a mother hen. He keeps asking me how I am every ten seconds. Then, he fluffs my pillow and tries to pour water down my throat. He's very obsessive of the monitors. It's quite annoying."

Gwen changes the IV bag, smirking at the thought of Ianto as a mother figure. "He's just worried."

"And then I get worried." Tosh winces in pain as the fluid enters her body. "Am I ever going to get out of here?"

"Owen is working very hard to find an antidote. You know how determined he can be."

"But he's distracted by that woman. Why did she have to come back? Didn't she do enough damage the last time she was here?"

Gwen tries to change the subject, not wanting Toshiko to get worked up. "Is there anything I can do for you?"

"You can answer a question for me."

"What's that?"

"Who's minding the rift?"

Gwen freezes for a moment and realizes that with Jack and Tosh out of commission, Owen working on an antidote, and Ianto cleaning up after three sick people, the city was suddenly vulnerable.

Tosh doesn't have to wait for a reply as she can see the answer written all over Gwen's face. "Get me my laptop, and I can keep an eye on it."

"No, Tosh. You need your rest."

"I need something to do. I'm going crazy in here waiting on Owen, and all I can think about is how when I get out of here, I am going to wring that woman's neck. That can't be healthy."

Gwen smiles. "Always the professional."

"Bordering on workaholic," Tosh jokes. She pauses and thinks about this a bit further. "You know, you have time for your relationship with Rhys. Owen has time to visit the pubs. Jack and Ianto have time for whatever it is that Jack and Ianto do."

"From what I gather they're very creative, so they must also have time to think of all sorts of activities."

"What about me? I come here, and my day is full. The work is challenging, and I feel useful and important. But outside of work, all I have is an empty flat with meals for one. I buy bottles of wine, but end up pouring most of them down the drain because there's no-one to share them with, and I can't drink the whole bottle before it begins to turn. There are so many side projects that never even get started, let alone completed."

"Is that why you had plans with Rory? Just a couple of single girls out on the town? Looking for trouble and someone to share it with?"

"Something like that. Well, exactly like that. I don't think I've ever been on a girl's night out. I think I was reluctant to go because I couldn't think of what to wear."

"You have no idea just how beautiful you are, do you, Tosh? And special?"

Tosh feels a bit embarrassed by Gwen's comment. "Enough of that. Just get me my laptop before the next alien invasion comes."

xxxx

"Any news about my girls?" Jack asks Ianto.

Ianto places a couple of books on the bed while he answers. "Now that Rory's seizures are under control, she is developing some sort of tolerance to the toxin. That information along with the chemical analysis makes Owen think that you are all suffering from heavy metal poisoning."

"So Rory will be okay as long as she's keeps her glucose levels up?"

"So it seems, which amuses her greatly because..."

Jack completes that thought, "You know how much she loves to eat."

"Exactly." Ianto has never been one for overtly romantic gestures nor flashy displays of affection, but to be so in tune with another person excites him greatly. It makes him feel as though he is part of something that was greater than himself.

"And Tosh?"

"No change."

"Right now, this must be harder for her than anyone else."

"Gwen is with her right now."

"That's great, but Miss Cooper hasn't been in to visit me."

"She's been busy."

"Doing what? Whatever it is, I hope that it includes getting me a 'get well' bouquet of flowers. This room could use a little color."

"It is a clean room. White is the standard color for this type of set up."

"Not only am I not getting any flowers, but you're also getting smart with me?" Jack teases. "But seriously, what has she been up to?"

"Trying to get answers out of Diane, but that's proved to be of no help. Miss Cooper also made sure that the hanger was decontaminated."

Jack laughs. "Clean-up? Isn't that what you do around here?"

"She told me as much when she tried to get me to do it."

"But you refused, and she had to go. I guess you wanted to keep me all to yourself."

Ianto rolls his eyes and hands Jack a copy of The Unbearable Lightness Of Being. "I brought your book although I am certain I am breaking clean room protocol. Is that the one you wanted?" Ianto knows that the book is about a man who has problems with fidelity. In it, Tomas, the main character, rationalizes his philandering.

Jack accepts the book. "Yeah. Have you read it?"

"Yup. Even saw the movie."

Jack notices the Welshman's slightly judgmental expression. "Then you know, it's actually a good book. It has politics, rebellion, repression, sex."

"I know, but don't you think it's a bit heavy. You are sick."

"Don't read too much in my choice of literature. I'm with you and only you."

Ianto would like to ask him if it hadn't been for Rhys, would he and Gwen be together. However, given the situation, he finds the question inappropriate and in poor taste. Instead, he says, "I know."

"What's the other book?"

Ianto hands him a light, comic novel about a man and his butler. The butler in the book could do no wrong.

Jack smiles and lifts up the second book. "I think I'll go with this one."

Ianto takes back the other novel. "Could you blame me for wanting you all to myself?"

"Even looking like this?"

"I'm with you in sickness and in health."

Till death do us part, Jack thinks to himself. Just thinking about that eventuality always leaves him with a pain in his heart. "What would I do without you, Ianto?" he asks wistfully.

Owen knocks on the door before entering, "Sorry to interrupt you lads, but I think I've got something."

Jack assures the doctor, "Don't be sorry. If you have an antidote, by all means share."

"I think I have an antidote Basically, once the antidote chemically binds with the toxin, it'll flush itself out of your system. It'll be just like treating arsenic poisoning. The problem is that if I give you too little, it won't work. If I give you too much, the cure could might kill you."

"What are our alternatives?" Jack asks.

"So far, this is the only solution I've got, Jack. We're working with a toxin we don't really know much about, and do you have any idea how long it takes to develop an antidote and how much testing it takes? I'm doing the best I can."

"Then, test the antidote on me." Jack says. "We don't have much time to lose testing it on lab rats."

Owen looks at Ianto who looks as though he might get a little sick himself. However, the Welshman keeps his mouth shut.

Jack knows what he has to do. "Tosh needs me. What's one more death if it'll help her? I'll do this again and again if you need me to."

"I'll get the antidote ready," Owen says quietly before leaving the room.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" Ianto asks.

Jack is resolute. "Absolutely."

xxxx

Owen works out the formula several times before filling the syringe, but thoughts of Diane keep running through his head. He wishes that they never met. He wishes that she she had been swallowed up by an exploding star. He wishes that the sight of her did not make him feel so vulnerable and that he didn't find her attractive. He checks the CCTV footage of the street outside the hub where Diane has been standing for the past couple of hours. Gwen gave her an identification card and some money for meals and a place to stay, yet she lingers around the building. She still looks shaken and struggles keep her hand steady to light a cigarette. For a moment, Owen feels sorry for her and even feels compelled to apologize. However, anger proves to be a more powerful emotion, and he tries to channel it back into his work. He could have been happy if he never had to see her again. He was beginning to think of her less and less and was certain that he would forget her. Eventually. Maybe.

He walks back into Jack's room and administers the antidote while Ianto looks on.

"How long until we know if this thing works?" Jack asks.

"Maybe in the hour," Owen replies.

"Why don't you take a nap, Owen?" Jack suggests. "You look like you could use one. Use my room."

"Offering the four-star suite, are you?" Owen smirks as he says this. But before he leaves the room, he has to ask, "The sheets on the bed are clean, right?"

With a slight bow, Ianto says, "Yes."

"Right, cheers, mate." Owen turns to leave again.

Jack looks up at Ianto and nods in Owen's direction. "I think," the Welshman says as Jack snickers.

Owen walks out of the room, but stops to check on Rory. She is still weak, but the rash has disappeared. The sight of her puts his mind at ease.

"Don't you look like a million pounds?" he tells her.

"Must be the sexy hospital gown," she says sarcastically.

Owen takes the hood off of his anti-contamination suit. "I think I don't need this anymore. Your immune system is doing it's job."

"It's not fair that I'm getting better, and they're not."

"Let's see. You lost your breakfast and your lunch which led to seizures while your body was getting itself sorted out," Owen informs her. "Your body has been through plenty this afternoon."

"So the seizures were just from my mad hypoglycemia?"

"But your recovery has given me an insight to this toxin."

"Really?"

"You've given me hope," Owen says to her gently. "Try not to worry."

"While I'm stuck in this room, there's not much to do other than worry."

"If you continue to improve in the next hour, I'll let you out."

"What am I supposed to wear? My clothes have been contaminated, and you do realize that this doesn't have a back?" Rory says, tugging at the collar of her gown.

Owen clears his throat and looks away. "I'll find you something to wear."

"You know, you're a nicer man than you let on."

Owen thinks about how he treated Diane in the lift earlier. "No, I'm not," he replies cynically. "I should go. Jack just ordered me to get some rest"

Rory bites her lip and wonders if she said something wrong. She doesn't want him to leave feeling upset. "Thank you," she calls after him.

Owen doesn't turn around to reply. A verse of that Elliott Smith song "Pitseleh" pop into his head, and he can't help but think how apropos they are to his relationship with Rory:

I'm so angry.
I don't think it'll ever pass.
I was bad news for you
Just because.

xxxx

About an hour later, just as Owen had predicted, Jack struggles to breathe meaning that Owen has gotten the dosage wrong. After Ianto calls Owen, he frantically searches through the drawers for something that might help, even though he has no clue as to what would.

"No," Jack says in between wheezes. "Doesn't. Matter."

Ianto shivers as he watches the life drain from his boyfriend. Jack smiles for a split second before one final spasm. Then, all Ianto can hear is the sound of the heart monitor as it emits one long steady beep, indicating a lack of a heartbeat. The Welshman turns it off.

xxxx

Owen walks down the hallway, carrying a lab coat. He opens the door of Rory's room and tells her what happens. She grabs the lab coat from him She struggles to walk, but her leg feels shaky, causing her to stumble. Owen catches her and sits her back on the bed.

"I can do this on my own," she mutters as she puts on the lab coat.

"No you can't," Owen says as he opens a closet and pulls out a wheelchair for her.

The alien tentatively rolls into Jack's room, and although she knows that her uncle will be alive again momentarily, she still sobs. "I'm sorry," she cries. "I know... I know that he'll be back. I just... I've never seen him this way." However, not only is she thinking about Jack, but, being in the white sterile room, she also remembers watching her adoptive parents die.

Ianto gets up and moves the chair next to the bed to give her more space for the wheelchair. Owen leaves them staring at the lifeless body.

He walks into the room and pulls up the monitor on Tosh, who is in her room with Gwen. He knows that he should probably keep them informed, but at this moment, he cannot find the words. He has moved beyond anger. He only feels numb from fear.

In Jack's room, Ianto and Rory watch Jack, waiting for him to revive. "You must have gone through this several times. Does it get easier?" she whispers.

Ianto considers this question before he sighs. "There's usually not enough time to deal with it. There's usually work to be done, the city to save. No time to dwell. Perhaps I take it for granted that he'll always come back to life."

"But here, alone in the room with him, his death is the only thing that matters. It's all you can think about."

"And the pain he goes through coming back."

"At the risk of sounding selfish," Rory whispers. "I like knowing that he'll always be there."

"At the risk of sounding selfish, I like knowing that you'll be with him when I'm gone. When I'm a senile old man – if I live to be a senile old man – you will still be in your prime."

"Now that's an idea that I'm just beginning to wrap my brain around. I'll outlive you all. More and more each day, the reality of being so different is beginning to sink in, and it's not just fun and games. You know, Max has been trying to set me up on a blind date with an old friend of his. The problem is that he sounds like a nice bloke."

"Would you prefer someone with a nasty personality?"

"I'm worried that I might actually like this other guy and that he'll like me. That's just going to make having to lie to him even worse."

"Well, if this person becomes very important to you, when it comes time to tell the truth, if he really cares about you, he'll stay. Well, there'll be a period of awkwardness where you learn to regain trust, but he'll stay."

"Do you think so?"

"Trust me on this one." Ianto smiles at the thought of how far he and Jack have come. "No relationship works without effort."

Rory takes Jack's hand and sits on the edge of the bed. "You would know, wouldn't you?" she says affectionately. "This is all theoretical at this stage. Don't even know if I want to go. Maybe I should just be on my own for a bit."

"What about Owen?"

Rory shrugs. "He doesn't want me. He's made that clear."

"There's always Tosh," he suggests.

"She is cute," Rory replies.

Ianto's stomach begins to growl. "Excuse me," he says as Rory giggles.

"Ianto, are you so busy taking care of us that you've neglecting to take care of yourself?"

He tries to brush off the comment. "I'm fine."

"Your stomach begs to differ. Eat!" she commands. "I'll keep an eye on my uncle. I'm not one-hundred percent yet, but I think I can be of some use."

"Fine," Ianto says. When he gets up, his head begins to swim, and he realizes that he was hungrier than he thought.

xxxx

As Ianto is about to drive to the supermarket, he notices that Diane is pacing around the invisible lift. Ianto would like to feel angry at her, but that would only make him feel hypocritical. He knows what it feels like to watch his co-workers and innocent people pay for a mistake that he's made. He understands that sort of guilt, but he can't let her stay.

He stops his car in front of her and says, "You should probably find a hotel and get some rest."

"I can't rest," she replies.

"Could you at least find somewhere else to pace before you start drawing attention to the secret lift and to yourself?"

"I didn't think..."

"Well, good night," he says as he speeds away.

Diane watches his car drive away, and she moves from the sidewalk to the front of the tourist office. She chain smokes as she waits for someone to give her any news and, if she's very lucky, some sort of absolution.

xxxx

Rory begins to grow impatient as she looks at Jack's body and begins to wonder if she can use her energy to bring her uncle back to life. Maybe all it took is a few electrical impulses to kick start the process. She touches his hand and begins to feel around the nerves of his body, but gets nothing. To make matter worse, she has some trouble controlling her energy so it only comes out in short, faint and erratic bursts. However, where reason would tell her to stop, love tell her to keep trying.

And then, it happens. Jack's eyes open as if he has just awaken from a nap. Rory gasps as she absorbs his energy and senses the pain Jack feels when he comes back to life. Absolutely horrified, she collapses out of the wheelchair and onto the floor.

Jack's heart breaks as he watches her tremble and weep. "Rory, what did you do?" he whispers.

"I'm so sorry, Jack," she cries. "I never knew it was as bad as that."

"How could you know?" he replies.