Disclaimer: This is an AU of what happened the night Lily and James Potter were murdered.

Nothing
by The Script

October 31, 1981

I stumble out of our local pub with Mulciber and Avery on each side of me, piss drunk and tripping over our own two feet. Tonight is a night of celebration, for tonight, Lily Potter will be all mine.

No. Not Potter. I spit at that disgusting name.

Evans. Tonight, Lily Evans will be all mine.

"Snape, you're wasted," I hear a voice say to me, but I can't tell who it belongs to.

"Your mother is wasted," I reply, my words slurring and head swimming. I grab onto a nearby railing for support while my fellow Death Eaters continue to laugh at my drunken stupor.

"Get a hold of yourself, Sevvy-boy!" Avery yells as he slaps me on the back, slamming me against the railing. "I'm sure you want to be a bit presentable for your little, ah… shindig tonight!" The laughs turn into cackling and coughing as he and Mulciber proceed with their walking, leaving me to gain my balance back by myself.

I reach into my front pocket to make sure the small potion bottle is unharmed. I hold it up into the moonlight and watch as the mother-of-pearl sheen colored potion swirls around the bottom, light blue and silver wisps floating towards the top. I pop the cork and take another whiff of the Amortentia, every aroma reminding me of my sweet Lily Evans.

Fresh white lilies, as pure and beautiful as she is.

Fields of tall grass and hay, just like the grassy fields we would lie in during our childhood.

Chocoballs, our favorite sweets to share during our long rides to and from Hogwarts.

I cork the bottle once more and reflect upon my foolproof plan as I walk towards the other two. Once the Dark Lord has murdered Potter and that bloody infant son of his, I will find Lily in her cottage and erase her memories of Potter all together. I'll then give her the love potion, making her mine. I already have more bottles set up, patiently waiting their turn to help Lily and I have the happy life I always imagined we'd had.

"…completely foolish to obsess for so long…"

Mulciber's statement hits me hard as I clear my thoughts and zone in on this conversation. "What are you blabbing about?" I ask.

"You, of course!" Mulciber replies as he and Avery suddenly turn towards me, spit flying with every word. "You're love for this broad is ridiculous!"

"Do not call her broad," I say quietly, my hand automatically going for my wand. "I won't stand to hear you speak of her in such a way."

"You don't like the truth, do ya, eh?" he says as he steps closer, hovering just a few inches above me. "You're pathetic, Snape. Using a love potion on a Mudblood?"

My grip tightens around my wand. "Do. Not. Call her. A Mudblood."

Mulciber is finally so close to my face that I can smell the firewhiskey on his breath and see the drool hanging from his lip. "If the name fits, use it. What sense does it make to drug her, huh? She's never going to really love you back, ya know. She'll just be a shell full of pseudo obsession for you. None of it genuine. Yeah, you'll live a fine life, Sevvy-boy."

Before I can make sense of my actions, I have Mulciber by the neck and pushed against a brick wall, my wand pressed against his neck. "You don't understand!" I yell. "You'll never understand! None of you will! It makes perfect sense!" I lean in close and whisper, "I could kill you. I could kill you right now and no one would care. Not a soul, I tell you."

"Stop this!" Avery yells as he pulls me away from his best friend. I watch as Mulciber falls to the ground, gasping for air. "Are you two mad? I know we've all had too much to drink tonight-"

"No!" I yell back, stumbling once again as I try to keep my balance. "I'm finished with you bastards! I'm off to take what is rightfully mine. Then we will see who is laughing!"

Before either of the men can say another word, I am off to the Godric's Hollow, disappearing via Apparition.

._.

I fall as soon as my feet touch the ground and vomit up everything from the past hour. My head is still spinning as I try to stand up and get rid of this disgusting taste from my mouth. I know that I am far from presentable, but once Lily has drunk the potion, she won't care how I look. I will be perfect in every way to her, just as she is to me now. I dust myself off and manage to make my way over to the Potter Cottage.

Lily will be mine. I'll prove them all wrong.

I step through the gate and see debris everywhere. The front door of the home is completely torn off and across the yard. I continue up the steps and into the living room. I can't stop the smile from spreading across my face as I see what lies before me.

James Potter is dead.

A cackle bubbles up inside me and escapes my lips as I walk towards the body, examining him and his surroundings. The look of horror on his face and terror in his open, hazel eyes makes me laugh even harder. There is no wand anywhere to be found. The poor bloke didn't stand a chance.

"You deserved this, you know," I say as I continue to stare into his empty, unseeing eyes. "You bullied me and made me the laughing stock of Hogwarts. I lost my best friend and only love because of you. I would've never called her a Mudblood that day if…" I let my sentence trail off. It's all in the past and my tormenter and enemy is dead. This is my revenge for those seven hellish years.

I spit at his glasses, watching as the goo oozes across his left frame and slowly slides onto his cheek. "You disgust me, Potter. Even in death."

I finally leave the body and continue my search for Lily, screaming her name from wall to wall, waiting for her to answer, to say anything. There is no answer though. There is only silence.

I feel fear in the pit of my stomach. Why isn't she answering?

"Lily!" I scream even louder, running from room to room, slamming doors in the process. "Lily Evans! Where are you?"

I hush. There is a sound I can faintly make out. It's a… It sounds like…

Crying.

There is a baby crying.

Oh no.

I run towards the direction of the noise, pleading silently to Merlin that my fears and worries are not true.

Oh no. No, no, no, no, Merlin, please no.

The crying is coming from the nursery, and the door is gone from this room as well. I step in and see that the body of Lily Evans is sprawled out on the floor and facing her son's crib.

My fears and worries are correct.

How could this have happened? The Dark Lord promised me Lily would be safe. He promised to only take Potter and son. He promised to spare Lily's life…

Could I really have been so ignorant to believe he would keep this important promise?

The crying is getting louder. I turn and see the baby standing in his crib, very much alive and exercising his lungs. Harry James Potter. Everything about him screams James Potter, all the way down to his messy jet black hair

Why isn't he dead?!

"SHUT UP!" I scream at the baby, rushing towards him and grabbing him in a swift. I am drunk, heartbroken, and angry to the point of seeing red. I don't know how, but this snot-filled imbecile is the cause of his mother's death. The lightning bolt scar fresh upon his forehead gives me this impression. He will die, and I will be the one to make sure of it.

I ignore his screams and point my wand at his scar. Come on Severus. It's just two little words. Avada Kedevra.

But there is one thing and one thing only that stops me. His piercing green eyes.

While everything else about this boy screams James Potter, his eyes are the only part of him that says he is Lily Evans' son. Those are Lily's eyes staring back at me.

I set the baby back down in his crib and fall to the floor, my cries just as loud as his. I pound the floor and begin throwing toys. "It's not fair!" I scream. "It wasn't supposed to be this way!"

I take the potion from my pocket once again and throw it across the room, watching the liquid splash and slide down the wall. I crawl over to Lily and hold her lifeless body against mine, rocking back and forth and sobbing louder than ever. The smells of white lilies, fields of grass and hay, and Chocoballs fill the room, bringing back the only childhood memories worth remembering.

This wasn't how our first meeting in years was supposed to go.

I am supposed to be better off dead without her, not the other way around. But now… Now I have nothing. Nothing at all.

I am nothing.