A/N: I apologize for not updating in a long time. I've just been busy (well, busy as in playing video games instead of writing). I promise that Chapter 5 will NOT take a ludicrously long amount of time to finish.

So, without further ado, enjoy.

Chapter 4: It's Retarded Bunny Time!

Hikaru has woken up from his sleep, anticipating what will, obviously, be a horrible day. "Ah...another horrible day in this fucking to-WHAT THE FUCK?" He yells as he witnesses what is next to him.

It is a white, anthropomorphic rabbit sleeping next to him.

"Um..." Hikaru said. "Can you get the fuck up so I can ask you what you are doing in my fucking bed?"

The rabbit wakes up from his sleep. "GOOD MORNING!" He screams.

The sudden yell causes Hikaru to fall off of his bed. "W-what the fuck are you doing in my bed!" He asked.

"DON'T YELL AT ME!" The bunny screams. He immediately begins to throw a tantrum because of Hikaru's sudden outburst.

"W-what the fuck?" Hikaru said out of confusion. "Um...I'm just going to go downstairs for breakfast now."

"Can I come with you?" The bunny asks.

"Yes, you can come with me." Hikaru says. "Just don't freak the fuck out like you did just now."

"DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO!" The bunny screams. He immediately runs downstairs crying.

"Oh shit!" Hikaru said. He immediately runs downstairs trying to catch the little motherfucker.

Meanwhile, in the kitchen, Hikaru's dad was making bread for breakfast while singing the Two and a Half Men theme with "men" replaced with "bread".

"Bread, bread, bread, bread, manly bread, bread, bread." He sang. Just then, the bunny jumps on Hikaru's dad, causing him to drop his newly-made bread.

"NOOOOOOO!" Hikaru's dad yells ad the bread falls from his grasp. "MY BREAAAAAD!"

Hikaru rushed into the kitchen, only to find the bunny on top of Hikaru's dad. "Oh crap." Hikaru said. "Um...is this a good time to start asking questions, Dad?"

"What do you want to know?" asked Hikaru's dad.

"Well, first off: What the fuck was this bunny-kid doing in my fucking room?" Hikaru asked.

"I don't know." Hikaru's dad replied.

"OF COURSE YOU KNOW! YOU LET ME IN!" The bunny screamed.

"Oh yeah..." said Hikaru's dad.

"Secondly: What the fuck is wrong with this motherfucking kid?" Hikaru asked.

"He's heavily autistic." Hikaru's dad responded.

"Wait, WHAT!" Hikaru yelled. "You know what? I'm just going to stop asking questions and get the fuck to school."

"Bye, SON!" Hikaru's dad said.

"Bye, Dad." Hikaru said as he left.

Hikaru got on the bus, and it drove away. When the bus got to the school, Hikaru got off but was nearly stampeded by a thousand other fucking kids. When Hikaru finally got in the school and into class, Ms. Hufflepuff punched him in the face with brass knuckles and yells "YOU'RE LATE!"

Hikaru got up from the floor and said "What the fuck do you mean I'm late? I'm perfectly on time!"

"YOU'RE LATE WHEN I SAY SO, NOW SIT THE FUCK DOWN!" She yelled.

Hikaru sat down on his desk as told. He immediately started drawing Picasso-quality scribbles of Ms. Hufflepuff having sex with Waluigi from the Mario games. As soon as he finished drawing, he immediately threw up rainbows on his desk. Ms. Hufflepuff walked up to him, punched him in the face, and said "No throwing up rainbows." in a Sylvester Stallone style voice, then walks away.

Oh god. Hikaru thought. Is it just me, or is Ms. Hufflepuff getting worse and worse?

"OKAY, CLASS!" Ms. Hufflepuff yelled, "WHAT IS 0 DIVIDED BY OVER 9000!"

The entire class gasped at the ridiculous question. Hikaru raised his hand to answer the question. "YES, HIKARU!" Ms. Hufflepuff asked.

"Well, first off: Why the FUCK would you ask questions like that?" Hikaru yelled, "Secondly. The answer is nothing. There is no possible way to divide by zero."

"INCORRECT!" Ms. Hufflepuff yelled, "OH FUCKING WELL. I CAN'T BLAME YOU FOR BEING RETARDED! AFTER ALL, I DON'T KNOW THE ANSWER, AND I'M LUDICROUSLY SMART!"

"Are you fucking serious?" Hikaru yelled, "You're not smart!"

"I AM SMART BECAUSE I AM JESUS CHRIST, GOD, MOSES, ADAM, EVE, WALL-E, HAYAO MIYAZAKI, BILLY MAYS AND JUSTIN BIEBER ALL IN ONE!" Ms. Hufflepuff yelled,

"Are you fucking kidding? You are NOTHING like those people!" Hikaru yelled,

"YOU ARE LYING! BY THE WAY, ME AND JUSTIN BIEBER ARE GETTING MARRIED TOMMOROW!"

"Wait, you're getting married to Justin Bieber? Isn't he supposed to be 16?" Hikaru asked.

"OKAY, I ADMIT IT, I'M A PEDO!" Ms. Hufflepuff admitted.

"Wait, WHAT?" Hikaru yelled.

"YES, I LIKE FUCKING KIDS. REGARDLESS OF AGE OR GENDER." Ms. Hufflepuff admitted, "HEY, YOU KNOW WHAT WOULD BE REALLY FUCKING HOT? WATCHING YOU HAVE SEX WITH SOME OTHER GIRL YOUR AGE WHILE I VIDEOTAPE IT, THEN PUT IT ON YOUTUBE!"

"WHAT?" Hikaru yelled as the whole class gasped.

"IN FACT, I KNOW THE PERFECT GIRL YOU CAN FUCK!" said Ms. Hufflepuff.

"Oh god help me." Hikaru said.

"HEY, KATY!" Ms. Hufflepuff said.

"Um...yeah?" Katy said.

"WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE FUCKED BY THIS BOY WHILE I VIDEOTAPE IT AND PUT IT ON YOUTUBE?" Ms. Hufflepuff asked.

"Wait, WHAT?" yelled Katy, "No! Why would I have sex with a guy I don't even KNOW?"

"BECAUSE I SAID SO NOW PROCEED WITH THE FUCKING!" Ms Hufflepuff answered.

"You know what? I'm just going to walk out of this class room." Hikaru said, "This is just ludicro-"

Suddenly, the school bell rang and everyone ran out of the classroom and went to English class. However, what Hikaru DOESN'T know is the horror that is the English teacher...

TO BE CONTINUED