Dany's eyes felt like she had rubbed them raw after not only crying so much, but also staying awake. She just had too much on her mind, and sleep had not come to her since the battle, anyway. She knew Tyrion and Varys were already keeping a close eye on her to see any sign of her becoming mad just like her father, but she didn't care. She would cry if she wanted to, then she would pull herself back up and go on.
Though…how could she really explain her constant crying and her moods swinging so rapidly from one to another?
Surely the war had affected her more than she could ever have been prepared for. When she felt like her thoughts had once again drifted into dangerous territory, again to the battle and her losses and the strategy for the war to come, she abruptly stood up, almost losing her balance in the process. She was in a rush to get away from her rather ominous thoughts. She needed to calm down first and then try to sleep.
So, Dany started wandering down the halls of Winterfell, ignoring her tired limbs and the cold enveloping her. She was free to walk around, silently, thankful that there were no people out to see her. She had been afraid, emotional, was now completely exhausted and she had no idea what to do with all of the feelings raging inside her body. Knew she needed to calm down, rest and then, in the morning talk to Jon.
She walked aimlessly, having initially planned to go to Jon's chamber right then, in the middle of the night, but realized that she did not know where that was. Winterfell was a rather intricate maze of corridors lined with cold stone walls and she had the feeling that they were closing in on her. Of course, she was cold and she kept pulling her cloak closer to her body, but it did not actually help.
A strong feeling of someone watching her crept into her mind, looking behind her back, so lost in thought that when her body collided with someone else's, she almost lost her balance. She was grateful to feel timid hands grip hers, steadying her. Her eyes fell upon the face of the other person and felt a sense of calmness take over her.
"Missandei" A slight hint of surprise laced her voice, seeing her friend apparently sneaking out of Grey Worm's chamber.
"Your Grace… " She looked sheepishly at the door she had exited from, a shy smile on her face. Dany may not know her way around too well, but she did know that Missandei's chamber was right next to her own, definitely not here.
Dany smiled knowingly at the girl, relieved to have some of their light interactions back. She caught the twinkle of mischief in Missandei's eyes, both sharing a light giggle, in full awareness of what was happening. Dany- who had wanted to sneak into Jon's room, but not knowing which one it was and her friend just sneaking out of her lover's room. At least she and Grey Worm had each other, she was glad that they had found solace in each other.
"How are you, my friend? " Dany held onto her hands, both in comfort for her and in need of reassurance from her, that she was not entirely alone.
"I… Don't know. I feel I should be happy, but I cannot be." Missandei looked at her Queen and friend, struggling to express her feelings.
"I understand. We all need to mourn our losses. And how is he? " Dany asked, inclining her head towards the door from where Missandei had exited. Grey Worm had been so strong both mentally and physically during the Great War and she could only imagine what he was going through after losing so many of his men.
"He had nightmares, barely now resting" The woman sighed, clearly not having rested much, either.
"Walk with me?" Dany offered, seeing that they both needed a bit of distraction. And she nodded, starting to head back towards her chamber. Hopefully without getting lost in the meantime.
"I'm sorry about Ser Jorah. He was a loyal man." Missandei continued, after a small pause. Knowing her Queen, she saw perfectly clear that Dany had not slept, had also been crying and knew that she needed some comfort.
"He was and he will be remembered" Dany vowed, her eyes hardening again with grief, but also knowing he would forever remain in her heart, having a special place next to memories of Drogo, their child and Viseryon.
Missandei had been the one to ensure that every tradition of each of their people for the funeral pyres was met properly. Had chanted the appropriate words, in each distinct language, making sure they were given the respect they deserved. And Dany was once again more than grateful for having her.
"Should I bring you something to help you sleep, Your Grace?" Missandei offered, interrupting her thoughts. She did not know how else to get her to rest because she knew Daenerys and she knew that in the morning, the Queen shall want to have a council and start again with whatever else was needed to be done.
"Would you stay with me? For a little while? Just like the last time Jorah left." Dany remembered, from what seemed like ages ago when she had found comfort and tranquility in just staying in silence with Missandei in front of the fire.
"Of course." And they stood silent on the furs, Missandei starting to instinctively braid Dany's hair, adding yet another braid for the victory. Dany had been feeling better now that she had Missandei and she knew that she was loyal to her, had needed her presence to be able to calm her nerves. She hadn't wanted to burden her friend with her problems, too, but she was the person who she trusted the most now.
"I need your advice."
And Daenerys led her friend and closest advisor in front of the fire in her, on the bed, settling down and told her everything. Told her the truth, told her how she was conflicted and confused and sought Missandei's council. She trusted her to analyse the situation and maybe help her figure out how to proceed. Because she was sure that her loyalty was notout of duty or because of heritage and succession, but out of trust in her as a person. Which is why Dany sought out her advice, knowing that she might even help her understand her feelings. And Dany allowed her time to think on it, keeping silent as she stretched out on the fur, resting her head in her friend's lap.
"But, Your Grace…by my knowledge, don't Targaryens marry into the family? Would you not marry and share the throne? Forgive me if I'm mistaken or overstepping…" Missandei concluded, not sure how Dany would react.
Missandei was not used to thinking in terms of succession and proper hierarchical politics. She did know, however the politic of arranged marriage and had thought it was her Queen's plan from the beginning for Jon Snow. She had witnessed their shared looks for quite a while, their feelings evident to everyone who saw them. So, she just did not see the problem. If anything, it should be more obvious of a choice to marry not only for politics, but mostly for love. And they clearly loved each other. She knew why Daenerys had avoided the subject until now, even before learning the truth. Her advisors had so often frowned upon her little interactions with Jon and the Queen had oftentimes not taken their advice when it came to Jon. So, it was easy to believe that they would have been skeptical at their not so political reasons to marry. But what if it was that easy?
After a long, pause, Missandei actually started worrying at the lack of any type of response. She did not even see Dany's face to see her expression, but, as she shifted a bit, noticed that the Queen was currently asleep. Exhaustion had claimed her. Sighing, Missandei gently lifted her head and placed a pillow under Dany's head, silently bringing another fur over her and went back towards Grey Worm, knowing that she would need to repeat her question next time they met.
Arya Stark had stumbled upon the Dragon Queen in the middle of the night, roaming the halls alone, seemingly without a specific destination in mind. Arya had just left after her talk with Jon, feeling good about setting him straight with a few things.
At first, seeing the Queen looking over her shoulder, wary, Arya started assessing the dangers herself, yet there were none, because she was the thing that Dany was sensing. Still, curious, she followed her silently, from a distance, watching as shadows of sorrow swept over her face with every passing torch from the hallway. She seemed conflicted, distraught and utterly exhausted.
Arya found that she quite admired the Dragon Queen. Even now, trailing behind her, seeing her walk alone, cautious from one hall to the next looking tired to the bone, she saw that human part of her and admired her all the more. It was a vulnerability which Arya knew must not come to the surface often. Much like herself.
She wanted to talk to her, felt the need to at least give her some sort of reassurance from at least one member of their family. Seeing as Sansa disliked her so openly, Jon now avoiding her because he was just plain stupid, Arya wanted to step in and give her some assurance. But she knew that Daenerys did not trust her, she didn't know her, so it would not have done her good to fluster her further. So, she decided against going to her, maybe next time.
When first daylight broke, Jon had already exited his chamber, intent clear in the sureness of his steps. He walked outside, drawing in a deep breath, allowing the cold air to clear his mind. He had gotten just a couple of hours of sleep, at least being able to rest enough after his conversation with Arya.
Jon walked through the snow briskly, the wind sweeping over him, having felt the need to check how Rhaegal was healing after the battle. He had come yesterday, as well, to see how he was faring, the echo of the dragon's screech still imbedded in his mind. When he had landed after the fight, Jon had been too focused on the final goal, running after the Night King, but as soon as he had had the time, he had gone to see the dragon.
Now, approaching both of them, he was pleased to see that they had eaten, that Rhaegal seemed to be healing quite quickly. He had no knowledge of them, what was normal, how fast they healed, but was pleased to notice the familiar greeting that they gave him. He got closer, now both him and the dragons accustomed to each other. A small huff of breath came from Drogon as Jon first went to check on Rhaegal and placed his hand on his snout affectionately. Then, he treated Drogon with the same courtesy, which the dragon accepted with another huff.
He had warmed up to these 'gorgeous beasts' as he had once referred to them. They were so much more, very intelligent, very instinctual and very dangerous for those who were not on their side.
Just as he was contemplating that, he felt what would have been considered a nudge, but with a force that had actually made him stumble a few steps. Rhaegal was trying to get his attention. A laugh escaped through Jon's lips, who would have thought that he would be petting dragons and getting along with such uncommon creatures. One of which, by the looks of it wanted him to ride him.
With another glance towards Drogon, he climbed onto Rhaegal and then held onto him as best as he could. He was surprised to see Drogon follow behind them. It was as thrilling as ever to fly, feeling so free and he watched as Drogon flew in circles over them, as though protective, watching over his injured brother. Jon was smiling, loving their interaction, yet, he missed having Dany there with them. It was somewhat of a given that she would be there, that they would fly all of them - together.
Lost in thought and completely focused on the dragon, he missed when Drogon swerved back towards the ground to meet his mother.
Dany had been quite surprised when she had woken up and realized that she had really slept. She had been exhausted physically from not resting and emotionally from recounting everything to Missandei. She fell asleep before she could have learned the woman's opinion, both grateful for getting sleep and frustrated that she missed the piece of advice.
So, as soon as she awoke, as she often did first thing, she went to see her dragons. And, now, to her surprise, they were both high up over the grounds, flying gracefully in tandem. It was a relief to see Rhaegal fly, to know that he was recovering from the wounds. When Drogon had turned to come to her, only then did she notice that Rhaegal was not alone, that Jon was with him.
A loud thudding footfall sounded just behind her and she knew that Drogon had landed. She was smiling as she placed her hand on the dragon's snout, having missed the simple moments where she could cherish her children without any impending battles. She just stood there, took a moment, listening to the low rumble of Drogon's breath before they turned and simply watched Jon and Rhaegal.
Silent and slow, for once, Arya approached the scene. She had been there to witness Jon fly up with both dragons, how carefree and happy he looked. She hoped that whatever may come their way, they would still have time to smile, to relish even in small moments of peace.
The Stark girl walked up near Dany, the dragon readily turning her way. It was a whole other sensation to see them up close. Arya felt like a child again, excited at the sight of these creatures that everyone thought extinct. And she was mesmerized by his eyes, they reflected intelligence far beyond that of any other animal. She didn't necessarily feel frightened, but she was a little uneasy. Though, she noticed that the dragon was only regarding her, appraising her.
Daenerys turned as she felt Drogon's head shift to the side. Her eyes landed upon the figure of Arya Stark. She saw something in this young girl, knew that she had been the one to end the Night King, knew just how skilled she was, but also, could see a youthful exuberance that made Arya so much easier to like than her sister.
"Lady Stark" Daenerys started, not sure how to interact with her, but was quickly interrupted.
"I'm not a lady, please, it's just Arya." A small nod was all the response she gave and a smile spread on her face, genuine, the little girl reminding her so much of Jon.
They then heard Rhaegal roar and she turned to see him survey her, Jon finally noticing why Drogon had gone back. Arya diverted her gaze, too, a smile on her face, seeing a similar light-hearted expression on Jon's face as he looked down at Daenerys. He did look every bit the part of a man in love. Arya almost felt like she was intruding on their moment, but then he saw her, too, which seemed to shock him a bit. That didn't really last because apparently, he was trying to guide the dragon to come to them.
But, Dany yelled a quick word in what Arya could only guess was High Valeryan and the dragon roared back, staying in the air. And, as Arya turned towards Dany, she saw that she was already mounting the dragon.
"Are you coming, Arya?" Daenerys yelled after the girl, outstretching her hand in further invitation, a little amused at the stunned look on her face.
Arya was beyond taken aback by the suggestion. She had been wanting to know what it was like to ride a dragon since she had seen them. Never thought she would actually be doing it. And she saw this as just another reason for her to like Daenerys, to admire her.
Daenerys felt the small hand of Arya Stark lightly grip hers as she climbed in front of her, on Drogon's back, the same hand that had killed their strongest enemy. What a thought. Never had she considered being afraid of the girl standing in front of her now, not because she looked so young, but because she saw the genuine smile Jon would give Arya anytime they met, he trusted her completely. Arya Stark had saved them all, had proved that she was a most valuable warrior, had earned all their respect and gratitude. And they might even get along well.
"Hold on" Dany told her before Drogon took off, a laugh of complete excitement resounding around them from Arya.
It was beyond anything that she could have imagined. Arya felt the wind hit her face, the speed of the dragon only making her that much more excited. They were so high up, every man inside and outside the walls of Winterfell only appearing as small as ants, her home so small from up above. And she could see so far out in the distance, the land stretching before them endlessly. She was overjoyed, allowing a laugh of incredulity to leave her lips.
Even from up there, Jon would have recognized her any time. Arya was with Dany, standing in front of Drogon, watching him fly, smiles visible on both their faces despite the long distance between them. And, just as he wanted to fly down to them, he saw Dany mount Drogon and offer her hand to Arya. Just then, he knew for sure he would not hear the end of it…
Maybe they were all going to be all right.
So, I rushed to finish this chapter before the new episode airs tonight. I wanted to give you my take on those little scenes with the dragons from the trailer.
Also, I always thought that Arya just had to ride a dragon, she deserves it.
And what did you think of Missandei in this chapter? Would that be too easy?
Please review and let me know what you think! Thank you!