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Three hundred pieces of broken up puzzle lay scattered across the kitchen table. Bifur studied them carefully as Bombur idly stirred soup in a huge pot by the fire. They both started slightly as someone knocked on the kitchen door.
"Come in!" Bombur shouted, and smiled slightly as Fíli entered, leading Kíli behind him.
"Hello young princes. What may I do for you today?" Bombur asked pleasently. He had always liked the two brothers, they reminded him of himself, way back in the day.
"Morning" Fíli answered with a tired smile, meeting Bombur in the eye.
"I came to ask a favor, actually. I have to go to a meeting with Thorin and Dain in a bit, we're planning for new arrivals from the Blue Mountains. I dont want Kíli to be alone, can you watch-uh can he sit here with you?" Fíli asked, putting a hand on Kíli's shoulder.
Bombur smiled and nodded. He felt for the younger prince. They all did. Kíli still hadnt spoken a word, and since the nightmare had been quiet and distant with everyone, even Fíli. Bombur knew it was just part of the mourning process, but he still felt a pang of sadness whenever he saw Kíli. The lad reminded him too much of his own brother, the one who sat at the kitchen table studying a child's game, the axe gleaming in the low torchlight.
"Of course. He can sit there with Bifur, we started a new puzzle today." Bombur answered, motioning with his ladle towards the kitchen table.
Fíli returned his smile, and felt a wave of gratitude towards their cook.
"Thank you."
He motioned towards Kíli and pulled out the chair for his brother. Kíli's eyes lit as he saw the puzzle and Fíli smiled. Kíli had loved puzzles when they were younger, he would spend hours and hours next to the fire studying them during the winter months. He hoped that this childhood ritual would help Kíli, maybe even get him talking again.
Kíli settled himself in the chair and examined the puzzle infront of him. It was of Erebor, naturally. Bifur had always put together all of the edges, and was working contently on pieces of the sky. Quickly, Kíli picked out two pieces that matched and stuck them together. He looked up and smiled at Fíli. See, I'm still good at some things.
Fíli returned the smile, "That's good, Kíli. Stay here with Bifur and help him finish. I'll be back in a bit, all right?"
Kíli nodded, then turned back to the puzzle.
They worked in silence, and for the first time Kíli felt truly relaxed. Here, there were no pressures for him to speak, no sideways glances, no sighs and hums of pity. It felt good, to be in a place where his silence was accepted.
Bifur tapped on the table, and Kíli looked up at him. Bifur raised his hands up, then signed "found blue piece" and pointed to the edge nearest Kíli.
Kíli looked, and saw the protruding blue piece from the pile. He picked it up and handed it to Bifur, who gave him a toothy smile. He then pointed to a pile of green pieces.
"Kíli work on green trees."
Kíli smiled and nodded, then started gathering the green pieces.
They continued to work in silence, signing to each other occasionally when one got stuck until finally Bifur pushed his chair back and stood up, stretching.
Kíli stood too and Bifur smiled.
"You two done?"
Kíli jumped slightly, then turned to see Bombur behind them, a tray in hand. Kíli shook his head.
"take rest." he signed, looking at Bifur to make sure he was using the correct signs. Bifur shook his head, and then signed a sentence Kíli didn't understand.
"that's the sign for break, what you did rest means sleep." Bombur explained. Kíli nodded, and accepted the glass of water the older dwarf held out.
"The both of you got really far, on that puzzle." Bombur told them, admiring the puzzle.
"You really have a knack for these kind of things, Kíli."
Kíli blushed, then sat back down in the chair, ready to take on more of the puzzle. By the time Fíli got back, it was finished and Kíli felt happier than he had been in a long while.
Fíli smiled, today had been a good day.
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Fíli opened the door to the study and motioned for his brother to walk in. Thorin had requested that his nephews have lunch with him in his private study. Kíli hesitated, bringing up a hand to his mouth and chewing on a hangnail-a habit that he had picked up a few days ago. Fíli knew Thorin had always made Kíli nervous, but never before had he seen his brother this edgy.
Fíli grabbed his brothers hand, "Don't do that, Kee. Everything will be fine, I promise." Kíli gave him an incredulous look.
"Dont look at me like that, it's just lunch. What could go wrong?" Fíli murmured softly, soft enough that the a waiting Thorin could not hear.
Kíli shrugged, but stayed where he was. Fíli tugged on his brother's sleeve.
"Come on."
And Kíli followed.
Thorin was sitting at the table, with Balin next to him. Both elders stood, and Balin motioned for the brothers to sit.
To Fíli's relief, lunch went normally. As normal as it could go with Kíli's silence. It wasn't until they were done eating that Thorin addressed his youngest nephrew.
"Kíli" Thorin started, Kíli looked up from his plate, eyes darting up and around his uncle, not meeting him in the eye.
"You will start work in the library tomorrow" he countinued
Fíli stared. This had not been the plan, he and Kíli had been preparing to scout out the west end of Erebor together, with a small troop of dwarves that had come in from Ered Luin. It was to be their first solo scouting mission as the princes of Erebor.
"The library?" Fíli interjected
Thorin nodded.
"The wild is no place for someone with Kíli's impediment." he answered.
Fíli saw Kíli's face flush.
"Impediment?" Fíli asked.
"He wont speak."
"But there are other ways, iglishmek, signs-"
Fíli was interrupted by Thorin slapping the table.
"Those arent good enough!"
Balin put a restraining hand on Thorin, trying to calm him as Kíli shrank back against his chair, eyes wide.
"But-" Fíli tried to argue, but Thorin cut him off.
"You will follow my orders. Three days from now, you are to report to the front gate, and Kíli is to go to the library to help Bofur." Thorin told him, his voice forcefully calm.
There was a pause as Fíli glared at his uncle, then;
"You are dismissed."
Fíli stood slowly, and watched as his brother stood up and bolted from the room.
"Kíli!" he called, but before he ran after his brother he turned and bowed to Thorin and Balin with a mumble of "thank you".
"Kíli!" Fíli shouted as he followed the younger dwarf down the hallway.
"Wait! Please!"
He watched as Kíli turned left down another corrider, towards their rooms.
Fíli found his brother sitting on the ground near the hearth, his back against one of the room's chairs. Fíli sighed, then sat down next to him.
They sat in silence for a few minutes, watching the fire crackle and burn.
"It's unfair." Fíli stated.
Silence.
"Don't let him get to you though. I dont think he understands what youre going through."
Silence.
"I miss you, Kíli" Fíli whispered, and Kíli looked at him, brow furrowed in confusion. He held up his hands and signed;
"I am here."
Fíli nodded, "But you're not. I miss you. I just-I just wish that battle never happened. Everything would be different." he whispered.
Kíli stared at his brother, hating seeing him like this. Say something, comfort him, let him know you're still the same person you've always been. He wished he could, just for a moment forget everything that happened and go back to the way things were. Even though this was their home now, it didnt feel like it. It held too many bad memories, even though it was brand new.
Fíli looked up at Kíli, "and most of all, I miss your voice."
Kíli felt a pang of guilt. He knew how hard this was on his brother, and on everyvody around him. He just wasn't ready yet, he didn't know if he would ever be ready to speak again.
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File looked up from his book and watched as his brother rolled over to his side, still asleep. Since the nightmare, Kíli had refused to sleep at all, unless somebody was with him.
"Hmmmmmmm Fíli?" Kíli mumbled
Fíli sat up in his chair. Kíli spoke? Kíli was speaking! He felt like jumping for joy. He rushed to his brothers side.
"Yes? Yes Kíli, I'm here."
Kíli's eyes remained closed as he mumbled, "The orcs. The orcs have shimmied in the pot roast again."
Fíli paused. The what did what?
Kíli's face scrunched, "I cant-I cant…."
"Can't what? Come on Kíli, talk to me."
"hmmm roast orcs"
Fíli sighed and fought back tears. When they were little Kíli used to talk in his sleep all the time, his ramblings of nonsense usually the highlight of the breakfast table the next morning. Now it made Fíli sad, whatever ailed Kíli was strictly part of his own conscious, and it was only himself that was holding him back.
Fíli reached out and grabbed Kíli's hand.
"It's alright Kíli."
Kíli pulled his hand away, and then his eyes flashed open.
"Fíli?" he asked again, Fíli couldn't tell whether he was awake or not.
"Yes, brother."
"-I-I-I-screamed, I-couldn't-help-him. Im sorry. Im so so so sorry." Kíli gasped and shook, curling into a ball, hands grasping his hair as he tried to catch his breath.
"It's okay, shhhh its okay." Fíli tried to comfort him, not really knowing if Kíli was actually awake or if he'd remember any of this in the morning.
"No, no no no. Its never okay. I cant, I cant cant cant." Kíli continued to murmur into his pillow.
"Yes you can. You are so strong, Kíli." Fíli tried to reassure his brother, rubbing his back. Atleast now they knew why Kíli was so upset, Dori had told him and Thorin earlier that evening. Thorin had hurummphed and shrugged and demanded that they find a way to fix this problem. Fíli had nodded along, but he knew his brother, and he also knew that Kíli would only speak when he felt ready to. It was just a matter of time. In the mean time, he would try not to pressure Kíli.
Kíli's grip in his hair relaxed slightly as sleep overtook him. Fíli hummed a nonsense tune under his breathe as he watched his brother slowly relax. The days were getting better, despite the nightmares. Fíli felt a pang in his chest as he remembered the days before the battle. When the clear peel of Kíli's laughed rippled through the night air and his smile lit up to his eyes. Maybe, just maybe tomorrow Kíli would speak, and then things would once again return to normal.
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Thanks for reading! Today is my birthday (I feel so old), so I thought I would give ya'll a treat and update this! Think of it as virtual cake. I hope you liked it!