On one fine afternoon, Touka felt it.
A new red string.
It slowly made its appearance around her pinky finger again. Which means, her soulmate was nearby.
She should feel relieved.
She should be excited.
She should be smiling.
But she didn't.
Instead, she felt distressed.
It was painful.
Because she still loved him.
But, maybe- just maybe, she should move on.
Three years were too long. She really should forget about him. Besides, he was no longer Kaneki Ken that she used to know.
"He's a dove now." Nishiki blurted, his one-year-old daughter was sleeping soundly in his arms.
"What?"
"He has amnesia, I think. He goes by the name Sasaki Haise now. But he seems to remember me vaguely, he called me senpai."
A dove.
First, they were no longer soulmates.
Second, he became a dove.
A fucking dove.
What a cruel fate.
But then again, fate had always been very cruel to her.
Always.
Ever since she was born.
So, this? This was nothing new.
Her attention was brought back to the present as she felt her string tugged and straightened, leading to the door of Re café.
Oh. She didn't expect her soulmate to be appearing so soon.
So he's a customer, again?
The chime was heard, and before she greeted him, she closed her eyes- taking a deep breath, wishing that this soulmate could help her to forget him.
She wasn't ready to move on, but she had to.
She needed to start afresh.
She had to forget him.
Slowly, very slowly, she opened her eyes.
Oh how she was wrong.
It was him.
Despite the stupid pudding black and white hair, the sharp jawline that made him appeared more handsome than she would like to admit, and his much taller height, it was really him.
Same scent.
Same eyes.
He even had the same stupid face.
She had thousands of questions on her mind as to why the string matched the same person twice. As far as she knew- once the string had been cut, both parties will be assigned to someone else. And she clearly saw him cutting it off three years ago right in front of her eyes. So how in the hell-?
Her thought was cut short as he approached her, his eyes seemed surprised but at the same time mesmerized seeing her beautiful face.
"Haise, how is your search for good coffee going so far?"
"There are some good coffee shops but none of them are that special..? So I will keep on searching I guess…"
"I see. I heard there's a good cafe in 16th ward named Re. Maybe you will found more than just a cup of delicious coffee there."
Arima was right.
He met his soulmate, right here, in the cafe.
He had never been to the 16th ward before. The moment he arrived there, he was surprised to see a red string forming a ribbon knot on his pinky finger.
All these years he thought he would never meet his soulmate, or he had cut the string off three times. Therefore he never expected her existence, and luck was by his side as she was exceptionally attractive.
Too attractive, he felt as if he was dreaming. As if this wasn't real.
He raised his left hand awkwardly, staring at his finger- then at hers, constantly shifting his gaze between them.
"G-good afternoon! I'm Sasaki Haise. You can see it too, right? The string?" He wiggled his hand, and the string contracted and extended with his every move.
"Yes, I can see it. I'm… Kirishima Touka." She bowed slightly and gave him a polite smile.
Ah, how beautiful.
"It's nice to meet you, Kirishima-san. Um, I know this is so sudden but, since we are tied by the same string, would you like to be my, um- friend?"
She almost snorted. Almost.
Friend?
"I mean, I would like to get to know you better… But it would be too sudden to ask you out, so…" He blushed while rubbing the back of his neck.
"I don't mind."
"R-really?" He looked so excited, and she chuckled lightly at his enthusiasm.
He's so different from Kaneki…
"Then, would you like to go out with me, Kirishima-san?" The blush on his face had become even more prominent as he waited patiently for her response.
Ah, now it's Kaneki.
This time, she didn't have the mocking expression. This time, she didn't seem to reject him.
"Yes."
The date was nice. He was trying his best to please her, and she was giving him her full attention, unlike on their first date which he didn't even have any memory of.
Her eyes turned sad remembering their first date.
How she regretted not treating him properly.
How she regretted not accepting his kind intention.
How she regretted not being able to have a proper date with him.
She wiped the tears from the corner of her eyes.
We're on a date now, aren't we?
It took them almost four years, but she was glad that they were finally having their first real date.
He told her about his amnesia, but she just smiled at him, squeezing his hand, telling him she was totally fine with it.
His mind went blank at the contact. So he just nodded dumbly as they walked together side by side, hand in hand, arms and shoulders occasionally bumped against one another.
He glanced at her beautiful face, and he felt relieved that her cheeks had the same red color as his.
Was her heart pounding as hard as his too?
He walked her home, and she was contemplating if she should invite him in. She was well aware that if she did, she couldn't let him go, as she had waited for him for three years long.
But in his eyes, she was just a stranger.
A stranger that he had just met- that turned out to be his soulmate.
But it didn't change the fact that they had just met.
So she didn't invite him in.
And he left.
But they made a promise to have another date next time.
The next day- during a meeting, Haise couldn't stop staring at the red string around his finger, grinning ear to ear like an idiot all the time and was in total lost when Hanbee asked for his opinion on the matter that they were discussing.
"I think Sasaki-sensei found his soulmate…" Mutsuki whispered to Urie, but he just smirked and took her hand in his, the length of their red string shortened as he did so.
She smiled at his action and looked up to see Saiko was trying to exchange a knowing look with her as her eyebrows wiggled playfully after giving a glance at their mentor.
Yeah. Sensei found his soulmate. Even Saiko could see it.
"How was Re's coffee?" Arima enquired once the meeting ended.
"It was delicious!" He beamed, not including the fact that he cried after taking a sip. "Arima-san, I… I uh-"
"You met your soulmate, right?"
"H-h-how do you know?" His face was a blushing mess in front of his superior. Is it too obvious?
"It's so obvious, Haise. But I'm happy for you. Cherish her properly this time." A small smile formed on the investigator's face as his hand tapped the half-ghoul's shoulder.
"I will!"
Haise was too excited that the word 'this time' wasn't even registered into his mind.
Their date continued on a weekly basis. On their fourth date, he mustered up his courage to kiss her at her front door before saying goodbye.
It was a sweet kiss, meant to be short but Touka wouldn't let it end there.
There was no goodbye as she invited him into her house.
He was a bit nervous, and she could see by the way his hand fiddled with his cup of black coffee, one that she prepared specially for him.
He took a sip, and as usual, tears pooling in his eyes as if he had no control over them. The effect of her coffee had always been too overwhelming for him.
"I'm sorry… I don't know why-" he gasped when she ran her thumbs on his cheeks, wiping his tears away and giving him a sad smile.
Touched by her kind gesture, he leaned in to press his lips against hers. From their first kiss earlier, he discovered that her lips were much softer than he had imagined, that he couldn't help but to kiss her over and over again now that they weren't in public. Besides, how could he resist when she returned his kiss with equal passion, threading her fingers through the hair at the nape of his neck- making him thrill?
Their foreheads pressed together as they caught their breath, the taste of each other's coffee lingered on both of their lips.
She took in his features. Parted, swollen lips. Flushed cheeks. Hooded eyes- gazing hungrily at her lips.
He wanted this.
And so did she.
This time, she decided to follow her heart.
She had spent three years waiting for him- her ex-soulmate who happened to be her soulmate again, therefore she didn't want to let him go anymore.
She closed the gap between their lips, her arms instantly wrapped tightly around his neck. He took no time to explore her again. Their hot breaths mingled, their wet tongues dueled, intimately.
His hands started to move on their own- pulling her closer, sliding beneath her shirt- trying to feel more of her skin, her curves, her warmth. Her body seemed to fit just nicely against his, as if they were made for each other.
Well of course, they were soulmates after all.
Their lips- albeit messily, never left each other as she guided him to her room, towards her bed. They fell onto the mattress, his larger frame hovering her smaller one.
Her hands struggled with his belt, and his hands fumbled with her bra clasp. Both just laughed at each other's clumsiness. But his heart raced the moment her hands went to her back, unhooking her bra, revealing her breasts to him.
He wasted no time in placing his hands- then his mouth- on them.
The sweet sounds of her soft moans fueled him, so he bucked his hips against hers- wanting to hear more, to feel more, to taste more.
But somehow, it wasn't enough.
She tugged his briefs off, and he did the same to her panties. Immediately, their hands roamed each other's body- touching, caressing, teasing, exploring.
His fingers stroke her, then slid into her- one digit at first, then two, then three- whereas her fingers gripped the sheet beneath her tightly as delightful moans escaped her lips.
As she came down from her high, he couldn't help but stare, absorbing every detail, etching it into his memory. Her inner walls clamped around his fingers, her chest heaving- glistened with sweat, her lips parted- panting for breath, her half-lidded eyes- heavy and sultry, and her face was flushed with pleasure. She was beautiful. So beautiful. And she was his.
His.
A part of him was hoping that this was real, that he was not dreaming.
Because it would be a lie to say he didn't want this, when it was her who occupied his mind ever since they started dating.
She pulled him down for a kiss, her legs wrapped around him, pulling him closer, closer, wanting to feel more of him against her. They both groaned at the aching pleasure. He was unbearably hard, and it was straining him undeniably, but he hesitated.
"Are you… are you sure about this?" he asked, breathlessly, his burning eyes filled with lust, but he just had to confirm.
What a gentleman.
"We're soulmates, Haise. Do it."
Soulmate.
He entered her slowly, so slowly, as her face contorted with the foreign feeling of him inside of her. She gasped in pain, and he paused momentarily, giving her ample time to adjust.
She urged him to move when she no longer felt the initial pain, and so he did. Slowly at first, then getting faster, and harder, occasionally moaning her name.
She held him close with every single thrust, never wanting to let him go ever again, even when he had no recollection of his past.
Their bodies moved together as one, perfectly in sync, until they found their release, until she was filled with his seed- which she didn't mind.
We're soulmates, after all.
Her head rested on his chest while his right arm wrapped around her waist, pulling her closer to him.
He stared at their intertwined fingers, the red string's length was short due to their close proximity. He pulled his left hand further away from hers and noticed the string extended with his movement. He moved it closer, and it shortened again.
"Stop it." She lightly punched his arm.
"Sorry. I just- I can't believe it. To have a beautiful woman like you as my soulmate, it's a gift from God to me." He gazed at her face adoringly as his fingers stroke her light blue hair. She chuckled. It sounded nice.
"Do you remember which string yours is?"
"Hm? What do you mean?"
"This could be your third string, you know?" She smiled, teasingly. Behind the smile, however, there was some inexplicable sadness in her eyes.
"You could be true… is this your first string..?"
"No." She noticed the disappointed look on his face. "But you're my first…"
His cheeks automatically turned red, but he was secretly happy at the same time.
"I- I can't remember if I've done this before. I'm sorry."
She leaned in for a kiss, smiling knowingly against his lips.
"I don't care, Haise. What matters is, will you stay?" Her violet eyes searched his grey ones, seeking assurance.
"Of course! We're soulmates, Touka-san. I will never leave you. Unless- unless you want me to." His face fell as he muttered the last sentence, but she just pinched his cheek playfully.
"Idiot. Why would I want you to leave me?"
Even if time passed, even if his body changed, even if he didn't remember her, Sasaki Haise was exactly the same as Kaneki Ken.
He didn't keep his promises.
It lasted for only two months. He didn't answer her calls. He moved out of his apartment.
It was as if he was just a ghost in those two months, and Touka wondered if he was real.
But the positive line on her pregnancy test kit proved her that he was indeed real.
Trembling, she ran her hand over her stomach. It was still relatively flat, showing no sign of the life growing within.
But she knew.
She knew that a life was growing. A life they had created together.
Will the child even be born right?
Her gaze averted to the red string around her finger- the ribbon knot seemed so securely tied as if to assure her that he was still alive, and they were still connected to each other.
It's okay, she calmed herself. We're still soulmates.