AN: Holy sweet mother of fuck! Someone finally left a comment! Which means there will now be a section where I respond to comments before the story! I kinda sorta fell asleep last night... oops, so story's a tad late. That's all for now, so time for the reviews!

Ja ne!

Responses:

Magickjonny69: Thanks! I'm thinkin' of makin' this into a long series so he will eventually, but most likely not in this story.

JGWO: Don't know if that's a compliment or flame but either way, thanks for reviewing!

Dialogue:

"Talking"

'Thinking'

This is reversed in furasshubakku

"There's no plural in Romaji!"

On with the story,

Chapter Four: That's Just Wrong...

Naruto tried to remain calm as he stood outside of Ichiraku's across from a large crowd of men and women who were watching him with rapt attention. Ayame and Teuchi were staring at the crowd with raised eyebrows as they shuffled slowly toward Naruto. Naruto was about to run when he saw someone pushing their way through the crowd. Naruto gave a sigh of relief as he saw a familiar face come to the front of the group.

"Neji, thank Kami-sam-"

Naruto was cut off by Neji appearing only inches from him.

"Naruto... kun."

Naruto swore he could hear Kami giggle as a blush crept up on Neji's face. Feeling a strong urge to vomit, Naruto turned and was about to run when he noticed another crowd of people. Then he noticed it. There were people everywhere. On the roofs (roofs is such a weird-sounding word), peeking through apartment windows, slowly pouring out of the allies, flying through the... someone was flying at him!

"Ack!"

Before he could see who it was, he was being carried over the person's shoulder like a sack'o'tatoes as they sprinted down the street with a horde of people, men and women, ninja and civilian alike screaming to 'give their Naruto-kun back'. Looking down, Naruto noticed a small, orange booking sticking out of the person's back pocket.

"Kakashi-sensei!"

Kakashi placed Naruto on the grass in a clearing in the forest where they lost the horde before leaning over Naruto with a large smile.

"Please... call me Kaka-kun!"

Kakashi couldn't hold it in and burst out laughing as Naruto went wide-eyed before retching in the bushes. Naruto eyed Kakashi suspiciously as he walked towards him. When Kakashi tried to put a hand on his shoulder he swatted it away, making Kakashi snicker.

"What are you doing here... Kakashi-sensei?" Naruto asked warily.

"Saving you from your fanclub."

When Naruto just narrowed his eyes at him, Kakashi had to stop himself from rolling on the ground in laughter.

"Maa, maa... I was only kidding Naruto. You can call me Kashi-kun!"

Kakashi ducked the kunai that was launched at his face but didn't get up as he was laughing too hard. After a good two minutes of nonstop giggles, Kakashi sat up. He sweatdropped as he realized Naruto had run away.

'There goes my plan of rescuing Naruto...'

Kakashi stood up when he suddenly heard fast-paced footsteps approaching, along with a scream of terror and two unmistakable voices.

"We showed you ours, Naruto-kun! It's only youthful we get to see yours too!"

"Yosh! I shall help you experience the springtime of your youth!"

When the orange blur and two green blurs that were following it were gone, Kakashi let out a few snorts before he was once again rolling in laughter.

'I should probably go help...'

Naruto sweatdropped as he witnessed Anko beating the shit out of what looked like the corpses of Maito Gai and Rock Lee. Lee suddenly hopped to his feet and sprinted at Naruto.

"You can't stop my yoooouuth!"

Before he could take more than two steps, he was bowled over by a flying dumpster, courtesy of a ticked off Anko.

"Stay away from my man!"

Naruto rubbed the back of his head as he walked towards Anko.

"Thanks, Anko-sensei! I don't think I could have kept running much longer..."

"I thought I told you to call me Anko-chan?" Anko pouted.

"Right! Thanks, Anko-chan!"

Anko slung an arm over Naruto's shoulder as they began walking down the street. They were about to turn a corner when Kakashi dropped in front of them with an eye smile.

"Hello!"

Naruto hid behind Anko with his hands on her shoulders as Kakashi slowly walked forward.

"Maa... I was only kidding, Naruto."

"Yeah?! Then why'd you tell me to call you Kaka-kun?!"

Kakashi tried not to laugh as he replied.

"It was a joke."

"And Kashi-kun?"

Kakashi was now visibly struggling to hold in his laughter.

"Uhm... Also a... joke." He got out slowly. He couldn't say more than a few words for fear of falling into a fit of giggles.

"Besides, if I try anything, Anko-san can protect you."

Still glaring at Kakashi, Naruto gave a reluctant nod. With Naruto keeping his distance from Kakashi, the group started walking.

After a good ten minutes of walking, Naruto realized something.

"Uh... where exactly are we going?"

"We've just been following you." Anko answered with a sheepish grin.

Kakashi snickered at Naruto's annoyed expression.

Naruto was about to complain about wasting time when a black clad figure in a white mask slowly rose into his view. How had he not noticed someone crouching directly in front of him?

"Uzumaki Naruto... h-help me..."

"With what?" Naruto asked, quirking an eyebrow.

"Rushifā-teme himself, he's after me!"

Before Naruto could ask who he was talking about, he noticed an old bandaged man at the end of the road. He had two canes strapped to his back like swords and looked absolutely fucking pissed off as hell. He slowly raised his right hand before yelling.

"Go!"

A swarm of ninja suddenly sprinted at them. They were retired nin if their age was any indication. And also they all had canes or walkers. And they were more like fast-limping than sprinting. The man with the white mask paled as the elders approached at break-neck speeds. Literally, trying to go fast at that age, more than a few of them tripped on their own feet resulting in faceplants. Despite there only being roughly seventeen of them, the masked man seemed horrified. When the bandaged man at the end of the road began running at him, the masked man suddenly grabbed Naruto and ran the opposite direction.

"Hey, what the hell!"

"Get your ass back here you little fucking piece of laughing shit!"

Naruto sweatdropped as a cane was suddenly embedded in a tree next to his face. This guy was even more violent than Tsunade.

They came up on a river where the masked man put Naruto down.

"Quick, how ar-"

He was cut off when Naruto suddenly chucked him over the river.

"Hey, than-"

He was again cut off as Naruto used Kawarimi on him. He was now in a heap in front of Danzo and his crew of elderly nin.

"Why, Kami-sa-"

He was once again cut off as he was smashed over the head with a cane before rolling away to avoid being impaled by another cane.

Naruto grinned as he wiped his hands together.

'I never thought Kawarimi would be so useful...'

When Anko and Kakashi landed next to him, Naruto grinned cheerfully.

"Let's go!"

They shrugged as they followed him out of the forest and back to the streets.

AN: I should really write out a plot, 'cause it's hard to just write without knowing what the next sentence will be... oh well. Next chapter will be out within the next two days. That's my goal anyways, one chapter every 48 hours or less. Sorry literally all the chapters are 1.5Kish. Do you think I should start a more serious story on the side? I dunno. Review! Flame! Give me some suggestions and shit! That's all for now,

Ja!