Chapter 4-Natasha

By: MysticFantasy

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Natasha carefully sat herself on the edge of Steve's bed, turning enough to where she was looking straight at him. She noticed that some of the bandages had been removed and no scars from the fire were present.

She reached over and carefully took his hand in both of hers. She wasn't use to seeing Steve be so still for so long.

He was the super active type and only stayed still when he was sleeping. And even then, sad as it was, wasn't for very long. Four or five hours at the most.

Natasha figured that there were other reasons he had for not being able to sleep much other than having been under for seventy years.

But Steve kept his personal problems to himself. The others wanted to question him about it but they knew better than to try. Steve being upset or angry was almost as bad as Bruce getting angry.

The difference between the two was that Steve has the mind to plan out destruction where it would hurt the most and last just as long. It was one feature of his that even Thor admitted he felt intimidated by.

Having read Steve's file before they first met, Natasha knew a lot of the things he'd done during the war once he proved he could be the world's only super soldier and still get the job done.

All the things he had done, all of the things he'd seen, all the pain and suffering he felt when things hadn't gone according to plan.

There was only one blemish on his plan's record but it wasn't held against him. It was the train mission where Bucky Barnes had fallen with Steve having seen it happen. It was the only time that Steve had lost someone on his team.

Not even a whole day later, Steve had beaten Schmidt and was making the ultimate sacrifice.

"Steve, it's Natasha. Thought I'd come visit you for a while." she said softly. "You're looking a lot better than the day you first came in here. The burns are almost completely gone. You'll be the same handsome face as before. It'll probably make Tony and Clint more determined to get you out into the night life like them. Don't let them corrupt you Cap. They're both corrupt enough for all of SHIELD to last a few years. I think you're the only one that balances them out. Guess that's why Fury put you in charge of the team. He needed someone with a clear and innocent mind to lead us. He picked right."

Natasha lightly smiled and reached over to brush aside a few stray hairs that fell across his forehead. She briefly wondered if this was something Coulson had done when Steve had completly thawed out from the ice.

She knew that someone fixed his hair and Phil claimed that he had been the one who did it. Either way, his hair had looked great when she saw the footage of Steve waking up and throwing two guards through the fake wall.

She could see the surprised faces of the guards and agents when they saw Steve up and about and beating the daylight out of everyone who dared to get in his way as he tried to run for it.

"You know, Steve, you and I have a lot in common other than the super soldier serum." she said taking his hand in hers again. "Granted that mine isn't very much like yours. We're both older than we look, saw a lot of horrible things during our youth, fought for things we believed were right, both became orphans at young ages...I wonder how things would have been if we had met back then.

"I mean, you're still about twenty or so years older than me but we're almost from the same time frame. Probably about the time that you stopped Schmidt was about the time I was born. Still, I wonder if you and I would have met at one time in the past. Maybe you would have been the one to stop me and I wouldn't have so much red in my ledger. I'm grateful to Clint for helping me though. You probably don't know it but I'm grateful to you for a lot of things you've done for me."

Natasha lightly smirked.

"I bet you don't realize it." she said. "Not that it's a bad thing. You've taught me ways that I can respect myself better. Learn to trust a little better...I can honestly say that you and Clint are the two people in the world that I can trust with my very life. I've never been able to trust anyone like that before. Guess when wrongful memories are implanted in your mind and you're trained to be the ultimate assassin, you learn not to trust. Being with the Avengers has taught me a lot of things. You have taught me a lot of things. One of those things is that you showed me that someone was willing to protect me."

Natasha paused in her talking and gripped Steve's hand a little more.

"I still can't believe that you would do that for me. You found me and got me away just in time but look what happened to you. This is all my fault. I'm never going to forgive myself for this. I'm sorry Steve. I don't know if you can hear me but I really am sorry. Even if you forgave me, which I won't blame you if you don't, I can never forgive myself. If...When you wake up, I'll find a way to make this up to you. I promise."

She quickly leaned forward and pressed a lingering kiss on his forehead before leaving with a glint of tears in her eyes.