TITLE: An Accident of Fate
RATING: R
PAIRING: Sasuke/Hinata
SUMMARY: I took one (comparatively) well-adjusted Uchiha Sasuke, plopped him into the canon Naruto-verse, and threw poor Hinata along for the ride.
WARNINGS: This story contains sex, violence, bad language, improbable dimension hopping for the sake of my amusement, and lots of jokes at Sasuke's expense. Don't read if any of these things offend you.
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or its characters. Also, this is not beta-ed. You have been warned. ;)
A/N: Ah! I'm sorry this chapter took so long to write. I had a hard time with Team 7's dynamic and the action scenes. It was pretty difficult to try and keep close to canon while still making the chapter interesting. Hopefully, I managed! This chapter has a serious lack of Hinata, but the next one will more than make up for it.
Chapter 4: The New Sannin
Five a.m. the next morning found Sasuke standing by himself in a dew drenched field.
His breakfast had consisted of two scrambled eggs and a cup of tea. He hadn't bothered to warn Sakura or Naruto that their teacher would be holding lunch hostage. Hunger could be a powerful motivator. It was also revenge for the vomit stains he'd had to endure yesterday.
He realized he was being petty and he was perfectly okay with that.
Surprisingly, Naruto was the next one to arrive, though his eyes were shut and he was shuffling like an undead thing. Even though his orange jumpsuit was rumpled and his hair stuck up every which way, his Konoha forehead protector was spotless and shining with polish.
Sakura stumbled in five minutes later, looking much neater, but just as sleepy.
It took his teammates half an hour to realize that Kakashi's tardiness wasn't going to be a one time thing. He amused himself by watching their expressions twist with fury as they finally caught on to the obvious. Sakura and Naruto were always so loud, but it meant that their reactions could be really funny on occasion.
"Aw, man! You've got to be kidding me!" Naruto hollered as his outrage swiftly overpowered any lingering drowsiness.
"No, I'm pretty sure this is a habitual thing." Sasuke said as he casually swept his eyes over their surroundings. It was still fairly dark and there wasn't much to see, but it couldn't hurt to familiarize himself with the terrain.
There was a meadow with three training logs, a lightly wooded forest, some underbrush, and a river. There was also a memorial stone nearby, but aside from that, it could have been any of the other training grounds in Konoha.
"Um, Sasuke-kun, what do you think the survival training will be like?" Sakura asked, biting her lip uncertainly
He took a moment to carefully choose his words.
Sasuke knew people listened when he talked, that his words held weight even with those who disliked him. Naruto was stubborn and proud, but even he had unbent enough to follow Sasuke's lead when it really counted. This was his chance to draw the three of them together and to make them a unit rather than a collection of clashing personalities.
In theory, they were the perfect team; a genius with a frighteningly powerful bloodline limit, a jinchuriki with an insane amount of stamina and healing capabilities, and a girl with potential chakra control to rival Tsunada-hime herself. Unfortunately, in reality, they were more likely to take each other out than to actually complete a mission successfully.
"Kakashi will probably be testing us on ninjutsu, genjutsu, and taijutsu. We're on a team for a reason though, so I don't think it matters if we're proficient in them all or not, as long as we show a basic understanding of each subject and a willingness to work together."
Naruto snorted. "Yeah, like that's gonna happen."
"Part of that was my fault." Sasuke admitted reluctantly. "I shouldn't have let things get so out of hand. If we let our pride get in the way of our teamwork we don't deserve to be genin. Once we pass this test we're going to be real shinobi and we'll have to depend on each other during missions. If we don't, we'll die."
It was the unvarnished truth, but it irked him to admit it. Sasuke hated talking about personal things, but this was too important. It was inevitable that Team 7 would eventually end up in a life or death situation and the more trust there was between them, the more likely it was they would survive. His teammates were useless and irritating right now, but he couldn't let harm come to them.
Naruto and Sakura were still staring at him wide eyes and open mouths.
It caused him a strange sort of pain to look into their innocent faces. They had never been touched by death. They had no idea what it meant to be shinobi, what it meant to be a living weapon in the service of the village.
Sasuke looked down for a moment. They were young and immature, but they were still his comrades. "So we're in agreement then? No matter what, the three of us will work together to pass this test."
Sakura beamed at him. "Sasuke-kun, I promise to do my best!" It was altogether unsurprising that she had backed him up. Hopefully, her support would be enough to convince their most skeptical member.
Naruto was squinting at them suspiciously, but after a moment he squared his shoulders and nodded firmly in agreement. "I still think you're a jerk, but that Kakashi guy is even more annoying than you so I guess I'm in! Let's do this!"
"HELL YEAH!" Sakura's shout was so enthusiastic that it had Sasuke's eardrums throbbing. She blushed when the boys jumped back to look at her askance. "Ahem. I mean, go team!"
Naruto was smiling widely. "Sakura-chan, does this mean that you-"
"No."
"Don't hit him. We're going to need him in one piece."
"Sorry, Sasuke-kun!"
"Why are you apologizing to him?! I'm the one with the bruise!"
Sasuke cut in before the argument could get out of hand. "Since Kakashi's not here yet we should take advantage of his absence and check our equipment. What did you bring?"
"Just the usual stuff." Naruto shrugged, still rubbing his sore ear.
"Give it."
"Wha-?"
Sasuke impatiently yanked Naruto's shuriken pouch off his belt and peered inside it.
"HEY! That's MINE! Give it back, you bastard!"
He easily avoided the punch aimed at his head. Did Naruto always have to overreact so much? Right. Silly question. "Calm down. I'm just looking."
At least the blond been sensible enough to pack all his kunai and shuriken, even if they were dull and worn down.
Sasuke took one of the kunai out and flipped it end over end a few times. The balance was way off. Not only was it heavier on one side, but the handle was frayed as well. It certainly explained why the other boy always came in last at target practice.
It was a wonder Naruto hadn't stabbed himself in the foot with these things. Of course, that may have been the point. Fucking prejudiced villagers.
The pouch also had a handful of smoke bombs and a blank scroll, though how Naruto planned to use it was anyone's guess.
Sasuke packed the equipment away efficiently, making a mental note to buy Naruto some decent supplies. There was probably some holiday coming up that Sasuke could use as an excuse and if that didn't work he could just make one up. For someone who spent a lot of time fibbing, Naruto could be surprisingly gullible.
"Sakura?"
"Here. I didn't really know what to bring, so I packed it all."
Yeah, that much he could tell at a glance. The small bag was bulging dangerously. She had a full set of kunai and shuriken, three scrolls, some spare bandages, a new case of soldier pills, and... a hairbrush and a makeup compact? What the hell?
"Uhh... it's for the mirror... yeah." Sakura mumbled awkwardly, her cheeks pink with embarrassment.
Right. Sasuke wasn't even going to touch that one. He tossed both pouches back to their respective owners and folded his arms over his chest.
"We're all set. Between the three of us we should have everything we need."
Sasuke's gear consisted of a full set of kunai, several shuriken, ten exploding tags, a small coil of rope, and a spare roll of ninja wire. He did have a reel of wire hidden in each of his armbands, but since it was a requirement for several of his favorite Katon techniques he liked to carry extra. Not that he was going to be setting anyone on fire today, but he could always hope.
The sun was already peeking over the horizon, but Sasuke knew that his team was still in for a long wait. It was just like Kakashi to want them disgruntled and off balance from the beginning. Sasuke could understand his thinking, but he didn't have to like it considering he had several hours of twiddling his thumbs in store for him.
"This is soooo boring! Gah! I think I'm just gonna go back to sleep! Poke me if Kakashi-sensei shows up, will you?"
"Sure."
Naruto sprawled out on the ground carelessly. In minutes he was snoring.
That was fine with Sasuke. It only made sense to catch up on missed sleep. Unfortunately, it effectively left him alone with his self-proclaimed number one fangirl. She seemed to have realized it as well, because she had her hands clasped under her chin and she was looking at him with bright eyes.
Great. Just great.
Sasuke crossed his arms over his chest and looked up to gauge the position of the sun. He couldn't help himself from silently urging it to move faster.
No such luck.
"Isn't it such a lovely morning?"
He merely grunted in response in an attempt discourage Sakura from conversation. He didn't want her adoration or her silly confessions of love. Sasuke had no desire to break her heart, but that was what would happen if she persisted in pretending they were destined to be together.
In all honesty, Sakura would probably run away screaming if she had even the slightest idea of just how violent and tragic his past was. It would definitely get her off his back, but it would also make working with her difficult if she thought he was going to go insane over Itachi at any moment.
She spent the next hour and a half stealing little glances at him. When he finally looked over and caught her at it she squealed in excitement. That was it, he couldn't take it any more.
"Look, could you not do that? I don't have any romantic feelings for you. Just because we were put on the same team doesn't mean I'll be your boyfriend and if you keep acting like a lovesick moron every time I look in your general direction you'll only be a burden. Understand?"
"Sasuke-kun..." Sakura's face began to crumple up as tears threatened. Okay, maybe that hadn't been the most tactful thing to say, but it was something Sakura needed to hear if she was ever going to become a capable ninja. Did she have to sniffle so pathetically? It was making him feel guilty.
He hated dealing with crying girls!
"What's the twenty-fifth principal of shinobi conduct, Sakura?"
"To never show your feelings, no matter the circumstances." She wiped her eyes hastily before staring down at her feet. "You're right, Sasuke-kun. I know I don't make a very good ninja. At the academy, I had the top scores for all the theoretical stuff, but whenever we were tested on anything real I barely scraped by. Ino-pig always beat me in our practice matches! I'm just... average. I don't have a bloodline limit or any special clan jutsus. Even my parents didn't expect me to pass the genin test."
"Then you'll just have to prove them wrong, won't you? You have to have something to fight for. Even Naruto has his dream of becoming Hokage."
Sasuke suspected his little inspirational speech sounded like crap, but it did it's job. Sakura was nodding firmly in determination, despite her damp eyes. "I'll try my hardest to pass the survival training... even if Kakashi-sensei made it sound really scary."
He gave her a thoughtful sidelong glance before nodding to himself. Sakura seemed honestly upset about not having any special techniques and he had plenty to spare. "Want me to teach you something that will help?"
"Really? Thank you, Sasuke-kun!"
"Don't worry about it. There's a genjutsu you can use to hide your presence. It doesn't take up much chakra, but you have to concentrate or the illusion will fail." In other words, it was perfect for Sakura. "Here, watch my hands."
He went through the seals several times before he was sure she'd memorized their order correctly. Just as he suspected, Sakura did well with the jutsu. She managed to make a good portion of her lower body blend into the background on just her second try.
"Good job. Now practice that until you have it perfected."
"I will!"
Sasuke's shoulders relaxed a notch when she turned her attention away from him to focus on the camouflage genjutsu.
He had the feeling he had been too soft with her, but he couldn't bring himself to completely crush her feelings for him. That would come soon enough anyway. Sakura was a smart girl; she would eventually realize that she was better off being his friend. Sasuke had droves of shallow admirers, but friends were much rarer.
Sasuke hoped it would be enough for her.
"Hey, uh, Sasuke?"
"Finally awake then?"
Naruto nodded and grinned, a little abashed, and popped up from where he had been sleeping. "You think you could, uh, teach me that jutsu?"
Sasuke gave him a measuring glance. "I could, but it wouldn't do any good."
"Why, you...!"
"You have too much chakra. It would just backfire like your bunshin. You might be able to do it if we had a few weeks to teach you how to conserve and control chakra, but we don't. The test is today. You'd be better off focusing on your taijutsu. You tend to pick that up pretty fast. I saw your practice matches at the academy. Even though technically they weren't legal, some of your moves were really interesting and unpredictable."
Naruto nodded rapidly, puffing up with pride. "That's right! That's why I'm Konoha's future Hokage!"
Sakura had managed to make herself properly invisible, but if the scoffing noise coming from her direction was any indication she was probably rolling her eyes.
Frankly, Sasuke was inclined to agree with her. Naruto was unreasonably proud for someone who couldn't even manage a single regular bunshin. Power was nothing without control.
"Don't get ahead of yourself, Naruto. At your level, you barely qualify for genin. Even your basic stances are sloppy. You waste too much chakra and you spend so much time showing off that you miss most of your opponent's openings. A lot of times you just charge with no thought to strategy. You have no subtlety."
"What the hell would you know about it?!" Naruto had bolted to his feet and was glaring at him fiercely. "I'll show you no subtlety!" Sasuke had to remind himself to be mature and not to snap back. He knew the other boy's temper was just a defense mechanism.
Of course, Naruto attacked him before he could think up a properly diplomatic response to diffuse the tension. Sasuke ducked his punch and grabbed the orange clad arm, using Naruto's momentum to throw him roughly over his shoulder.
"Oof!"
He crossed his arms and looked down at the blond sprawled at his feet. "Are you finished?"
"NO! I haven't even started, bastard! I'm gonna kick your ass!"
Sasuke stumbled back as Naruto threw himself at his legs. The fight that followed was hardly a challenge to Sasuke, in fact, it was more like a playful tussle. On his part at least. The screamed death threats implied that Naruto was taking it a bit more seriously.
"Ow! No biting!" He clamped his foot down on Naruto's head and squinted at the teeth marks on his left hand. Great, now he probably had rabies.
"Pffffh!!" When Naruto began to thrash for air, Sasuke let the other boy up enough for him to spit out a few clumps of dirt. "Get off me, asshole!"
"No. You'll just attack me again."
"AAARRGH!! I HATE YOU SO MUCH!!"
He put more weight on his foot, driving Naruto's face into the earth again.
A bored voice cut in. "Please don't suffocate your teammate. Do you have any idea how much paperwork I'd have to do if you killed him?"
"YOU'RE LATE!!" Naruto and Sakura screamed in unison. Naruto's face was streaked with dirt and his hair was mussed from Sasuke's sandal, but other than that he was none the worse for wear. Sasuke was far too skilled to accidentally damage him.
"Ahh, well, this black cat crossed my path and-"
"GRRR!!"
"Now, now, don't get testy. You guys are so uncute."
Last time Sasuke had checked, cuteness wasn't a requirement for becoming a ninja, but he really didn't want to encourage Kakashi by acknowledging his strange statements.
"Can we just get on with it?" He prodded.
"Sure, sure. Let me just set this alarm clock for noon. Your task today is to steal these two bells," Kakashi paused to jingle them teasingly, "before that alarm goes off. If you fail in your appointed task, you won't get any lunch. I'll not only tie you to a post, but I'll eat it right in front of you! Sounds fun, right?"
Naruto and Sakura's stomachs seemed to disagree.
"Wait a minute! Why are there only two bells?"
"Whichever one of you doesn't get a bell will be tied to the log and you'll be sent back to the academy. Of course, it's entirely possible that all three of you will fail. To even things out, I'll let you use your shuriken. You won't be able to get a bell unless you come at me with intent to kill."
Sasuke knew that much was true. Copy-nin Kakashi was no ordinary jounin. If capturing the bells had been the real test, Naruto and Sakura would have been screwed. Of course, the other two were completely unaware of what they were up against.
"But you'll be in danger, sensei!" Sakura exclaimed worriedly.
"Yeah! You couldn't even dodge that blackboard eraser!"
Kakashi gave them a blank look. "Well, you know what they say. Those with the least talent often bark the loudest. We'll just ignore the dead last, shall we? You may begin when I say-"
Naruto was already charging, his kunai aimed at Kakashi's stomach.
"Slow down. I haven't said start yet." The jounin drawled. He was holding Naruto in place by the head, his arm twisted around so that the kunai was pointed at the back of his student's neck.
Naruto was so impulsive. It was embarrassing.
"Well, at least you're prepared to come at me with intent to kill now. I guess you guys aren't so bad after all." Kakashi chuckled. "Okay, let's get this thing started. Get ready..."
"GO!"
All three of them darted away in search of cover.
Sasuke settled himself in a tree a fair distance away from the clearing they had been standing in. Basic instinct prevented most humans from looking up for predators, which meant there was a larger chance of him slipping past an enemy-nin's notice in this position. Of course, he knew better than to think Kakashi would fall for something that simple, but it would lead him to believe Sasuke's skill level was only slightly higher than the average genin's.
A quick sweep and he located Sakura hiding under a bush. She hadn't bothered to use the jutsu he had taught her, either to conserve her chakra or because she just hadn't thought of it. At least she had bothered to hide, because Naruto sure as hell hadn't.
He was standing in front of Kakashi as bold as you please.
Sasuke settled in to watch the show. He could collect the other two afterwards and browbeat them into working together. It would be much easier once Kakashi took their trouble-making teammate down a peg or two.
He spent so much time laughing at Kakashi's One Thousand Years of Pain technique that he almost missed Naruto getting dunked in the river and the shadow clone free for all that followed. Kakashi used the kawamiri no jutsu to escape, quickly planting a trap while Naruto was still occupied with fighting himself.
Sure enough, as soon as the blond haired boy noticed the bell glinting in the afternoon sun, he leapt on it.
Sasuke sighed as his teammate's indignant shouts drifted over to him.
The idiot was hanging upside down from the tree as Kakashi calmly collected the bell and proceeded to lecture him on exactly the same things Sasuke had chided him for earlier that morning. Hopefully, hearing it twice would help the information sink into Naruto's impossibly thick skull.
Sasuke sat up quickly as soon as he noticed Kakashi deliberately lowering his guard.
It was obviously another test. Well, who was he to disappoint?
All of his kunai and shuriken unerringly hit their target. Kakashi jerked as the weapons imbedded themselves in his body, blood flying everywhere. Naruto started freaking out, unaware that Kakashi had used the kawamiri no jutsu again.
Sasuke was moving before the log hit the ground. He was fairly sure that his sensei would leave their confrontation for last, but there was no sense taking chances. He doubled back as soon as Kakashi was a safe distance away. Sasuke took his time gathering his weapons from the shattered log while Naruto hollered at him and generally made an ass of himself.
"Stop smirking and get me down from here!"
"Only if you shut up and follow my lead. There's no way you can get that bell on your own. We're supposed to work together, remember?"
Naruto grumbled and cursed, but finally gave in... after he managed to get himself free and promptly fall for Kaakashi's second trap.
"Come on. We've wasted enough time here. You need to make a few kage bunshin and have them henge into me." Sasuke was perfectly capable of preforming the jutsu himself, but it would drain most of his chakra and he had the feeling he would be needing it.
"Why?"
"To distract Kakashi while we go and collect Sakura."
Before Naruto could question him again, a shrill scream echoed through the forest.
"Sakura-chan!!"
"Wait! Don't forget the kage bunshin."
"Oh right."
Sasuke sighed. It was like trying to herd cats.
They found Sakura unconscious in a shaded meadow. He hung back and let Naruto fuss over her, but it made no difference. As soon as her eyes popped open she leapt for Sasuke with open arms. Only a quick kawamiri with a certain blond kept her from latching on to him.
"Sakura-chan!" Naruto shouted in glee before hugging her tightly.
"Wh-what?! You're not Sasuke-kun! Let me go!" No matter how hard she tried, she couldn't pry him off. Naruto, who was nuzzling her shoulder, hardly seemed to notice her efforts to escape. A few bonks on the head finally earned Sakura her freedom.
Sasuke could only roll his eyes at the spectacle they made. "Are you two finished wasting our time? Kakashi's probably hunting down Naruto's shadow clones right now, but that won't keep him occupied for long. We need to come up with a strategy."
Sakura was shaking her head wildly, her pink hair flying everywhere. "No! He's too strong! There's no way we can beat him."
"Sakura-chan, it's too early to give up now!"
"We can win if we play dirty. He's a jounin. That means he has tons of experience and a variety of high level techniques so just ganging up on him won't help us at all. An ambush would be our best bet."
Naruto grinned ferally and cracked his knuckles. "Ha! Now we're talking!"
"How will that help? Kakashi-sensei doesn't have any weaknesses!"
Sasuke smirked. "Yes, he does. It's just lucky for us that we have someone specialized in a certain type of jutsu on our team."
"But, I don't understand..." Sakura scratched at her cheek, her brows furrowed thoughtfully. "Do you mean your katon jutsus? Sasuke-kun, you're awesome, but do you really think something like that will work against a jounin?"
He gestured them both closer and then bent down to whisper his plan in their ears. Sakura collapsed in shock at his suggestion. Beside her, Naruto began to convulse with laughter.
Sasuke flashed them both a rare smile before sticking his hand out in front of them. "So, are you guys in?"
"You can count on it! We're gonna beat the hell out of him!" Naruto's hand looked startlingly tan against the Uchiha's paler skin. "Come on, Sakura-chan, you too!"
"All right. It's crazy, but it just might work." She placed her smaller hand on top of theirs. "From here on out, the three of us have to work as one!"
"Yeah!"
Sasuke smirked a little in response. They'd made the same promise this morning, but now it felt real. They meant it this time.
They were a team.
Sasuke was sweating heavily and his breath was coming in quick pants despite how he had tried to conserve his energy. Satisfied with the false trails he'd set down, he finally backtracked towards the river. He flipped off a branch and landed on the water, his footsteps splashing rapidly over the surface as he ran towards the clearing with the memorial stone where his teammates were anxiously awaiting him.
It had been his job to draw Kakashi out while Naruto and Sakura set up the trap. Even with his knowledge as a jounin, it had taken every ounce of Sasuke's concentration to keep the older man from catching him.
Even now he could feel Kakashi closing in.
There had been several close calls, but Sasuke's cunning and his sensei's overconfidence had kept things from getting too messy. He could only hope that Naruto hadn't screwed up his part of the plan. Everything hinged on the blond boy's timing.
Like any other seasoned ninja, years of experience in the field had given him a sixth sense about approaching enemies and right now it was going haywire. That was the only reason he managed to avoid the nin-dog as it shot out of the water towards him.
It was the one with sunglasses. Sasuke hated that dog. The one time Kakashi had asked him to walk his pets, the mangy furball had bitten him.
If Kakashi was using his summons to track him down, he couldn't be too far behind. Damn it! Sasuke shunted chakra towards his eyes, activating his Sharingan without a second thought. He charged the overgrown poodle at a swift run. It was simple enough to avoid the sharp teeth aiming for his thigh and the blunt claws slashing at his shin. The hard kick he landed on its rib cage managed to propel the canine into the air.
Sasuke landed several more blows and ended the combo with an axe kick on it's back.
"SHISHI RENDAN!"
The summoned dog hit the water hard before bursting into a cloud of smoke. Sasuke landed easily and took a moment to check his surroundings, grimacing when he felt a flare of Kakashi's ki not too far from where he was. There was no way his sensei had not noticed the backwash of chakra from his dispersed summons.
It was almost time.
He leapt onto the riverbank and darted through the underbrush towards the bright flare of energy that was Naruto. Kakashi was headed straight for him, but it really wasn't a problem. Sasuke was sure that his teacher had figured out that he was setting a trap, but he doubted that Kakashi suspected the other two genin were involved, not when his teacher had already pegged him as a genius loner. Kakashi had too many preconceptions, having been a young arrogant genius himself once upon a time. He was right to a certain extent. If Sasuke didn't have the maturity to know better he probablywould have labeled Sakura and Naruto as dead weight and left it at that.
Sasuke did know better though and even if his young teammates were dead weight right now, they wouldn't always be. For the time being, he could shoulder their burden until they were strong enough to carry it on their own.
He reached the clearing they had agreed to meet at in record time. Naruto was hiding in the bushes to the left while Sakura was using her new genjutsu to hide behind a tree. Naruto was rustling about in a very obvious manner, but at least he was attempting to be stealthy this time. Sasuke gave them the signal and darted up into a nearby tree.
He didn't have enough chakra to reliably use the camouflage genjutsu, so he slowed his breathing and muffled his chakra. Sasuke settled behind a leafy branch and leaned against the trunk of the tree in the hopes that it's faint energy would overshadow his own. There was a trick to hiding in plain sight, of falling into a state of complete stillness that made it ridiculously easy to be overlooked. Hinata was better at it than he was, but Sasuke good enough at it to escape Kakashi's distracted notice.
And with Naruto around, there was little doubt that he would be distracted.
Sasuke smirked triumphantly when his teacher cautiously emerged from woods. Kakashi had officially taken the bait. Now it was time to reel him in.
Kakashi didn't even bother to look surprised when Naruto leapt out of the bush and planted himself in front of the jounin. His expression was almost theatrically long-suffering.
"HA! Prepare to be defeated, Kakashi-sensei!"
"You again? Haven't you learned your lesson?"
"The only thing I've learned is that you're annoying!" It wasn't exactly the best comeback ever, but Sasuke was willing to take what he could get. He was just happy Naruto hadn't made an even bigger fool of himself.
"Is that all? You're not a very good student, are you? So far, all you've done is waste my time and bore me." Kakashi turned his attention to his vest pocket and fished out his copy of Icha Icha Paradise before burying his nose in the orange book dismissively.
That was all Sasuke needed to see to know that his presence had truly been overlooked. Kakashi wouldn't have risked it if he suspected Sasuke was still hanging around, not after the run-around he'd been given. It galled him that he'd apparently been written off as a chicken who was too afraid of confrontation to actually stand his ground and set up a decent trap, but it did give them the advantage.
"Yeah? Well, this should get your attention! Now, Sakura-chan!"
As soon as she dropped the illusion hiding Naruto's clones, a chorus of high pitched voices cried out. "HAREM NO JUTSU!"
"Ooooh, Kakashi-sama!"
"Kakashi-kun!"
"Take me, you stud!"
Hatake Kakashi dropped his copy of Icha Icha paradise in shock as the horde of buxom blondes leapt on him eagerly. His eyes were wide with disbelief, his nosebleed was noticeable even from behind the mask, and most importantly his guard was finally down.
Sasuke kicked away from tree he had been using for cover to land behind Kakashi.
The movement snapped his teacher out of his disorientation, but it was too late. Sasuke's attack landed before he could do more than turn his head. Despite the swift blow Kakashi received to the back of his neck, he just barely managed to stay conscious.
Sasuke avoided his clumsy counter-attack and made sure the second hit had much more force behind it. He stepped back as the jounin staggered before dropping heavily to the ground.
"YEAH! We did it!! We ROCK!"
"HELL YEAH!"
It had been almost too easy. There was very little satisfaction in taking down the infamous Copy-Nin Kakashi because he was a drooling pervert, but at Team 7's current level it was really the only way they could have managed it.
Oh well. Sexy no jutsu or not, it was still an impressive win for three rookies fresh out of the academy. Kakashi was probably going to die of embarrassment once this got out.
"So... what do we do with him now?"
"We're going to give him a taste of his own medicine." Smirking, Sasuke retrieved the rope from his pack and began to uncoil it.
Sasuke was disgusted to discover that the lunch his team had so valiantly fought for was barely palatable. The rice was overcooked, the vegetables were tasteless, and there weren't even any tomatoes. He had the dark suspicion that the cooking was Kakashi's. Scowling, he removed the lid from the bento and swiftly dumped half of his lunch onto it.
"Here, Naruto."
"Hey, thanks! Itadakimasu!"
Sasuke shot him an annoyed look and quickly turned his attention back to his meal when Naruto started pigging out. He had to move away a little to avoid flying bits of food, since Naruto had been forced to eat without chopsticks and was making a complete mess of it.
"Sasuke-kun, you barely left any for yourself! Here, have some of mine."
"I'm fine. I ate breakfast."
"But still! You worked so hard, you must be hungry. You can have my egg too. Naruto! Watch your manners! Geez, you're getting rice all over the place! I think you're getting more of it on your shirt than actually inside you! Here, I'm on a diet anyway."
"Sakura-chan! I love youuuu!"
By the time Sakura had finished donating bits of her lunch to the boys, the three of them had roughly equal portions.
"Maybe we should have saved some for Kakashi-sensei." She pondered aloud, turning to stare at their sensei.
They had firmly lashed him to the post behind them. Naruto had wanted to take it a step further and remove his mask, but Sasuke had quickly vetoed that idea. Kakashi was going to be hellbent on revenge as it was, there was no need to give him a reason to be creative about it. All shinobi were fiercely protective of their privacy, but Kakashi took it to a whole new level.
"He'll be fine. Jounin are trained to go days without food. A missed meal is nothing to him."
"Wow, really? That's kind of cool."
"I'm glad you think so."
Sasuke froze and then turned slowly. What little was left of the rope was loosely wrapped around the base of the training log. Kakashi was standing several paces away, looking none too pleased.
"KAKA-SENSEI?? B-but we tied you up!"
"Yes, I noticed that. The bells?"
Sasuke fished them out of his pocket and tossed them to his sensei. "Catch."
Kakashi plucked both bells out of the air and bent down to smile sadistically at his pupils. He was using a mixture of killing intent and genjutsu to make the air around him heavy and oppressive. Even Sasuke found it difficult to breathe with their teacher looming ominously over them like that. For an instant, he thought that he had misjudged Kakashi and that they were all going to die horrifically painful deaths.
"I want all three of you to report directly to the Hokage..."
He wasn't going to send them back to the academy, was he? That was worse than death! There was no way Sasuke was going to wait half a year to take the genin test again!
"...and tell him that you passed!"
"Whaaaat??" Naruto squawked, falling over out of sheer surprise.
Sakura exhaled in relief and wiped the sweat off her forehead. "Whew!"
It was such a small step, becoming genin, but Sasuke couldn't help but feel a fierce sense of pride and accomplishment. He had managed to convince Naruto and Sakura to work together and he'd bested the Yondaime's student. That was nothing to scoff at.
Kakashi turned and even with the mask obscuring his expression Sasuke could see the humor drain out of him. He was staring at the memorial stone.
"All three of you have the potential to become great shinobi... because you managed to rise above your petty disagreements and work as a team. That's what it means to be a shinobi of the leaf. A ninja who fails to complete his mission is trash, but anyone who refuses to take care of their comrades is worse than trash.
"I have to admit that I'm surprised you guys figured out that this test was designed to pit you against each other to see which of you could put aside your personal interests for the sake of the mission. Even if one of you is remarkably slow."
"HEY! Why are you looking at me?!"
"Because on real missions, you don't get second chances. You ran around on your own, without any regard to your teammates. Recklessness like that endangers your mission and your comrades."
Kakashi blurred and reappeared behind Sakura, resting the blade of his kunai lightly against her neck. "It's a common tactic to take hostages. You'll be risking your life out in the field. It's important to be strong as an individual, but if you can't work seamlessly in a group, then you're better off quitting right now before you get yourself or your teammates killed. Do you understand?"
He pushed Sakura away gently. She panted and clutched at her throat dramatically, though Kakashi had been careful not to so much as scratch her.
"You can't play around when people's lives are at stake. You see that stone with all the names carved onto it? All of those names are ninjas recognized as heroes of this village."
Naruto's eyes lit up and he latched onto the word hero with a fervor. "Hey, hey! That's what I'll become! A hero! I want my name on that thing!"
Sasuke had to repress a shiver. He wasn't superstitious, but hearing Naruto say those words sent a chill up his spine. It was entirely possible that some day Naruto's name would be carved on that stone.
"These aren't just normal heroes. They're all heroes who were killed in action. They died protecting our village. This a memorial... my best friend's name is carved here."
Uchiha Obito.
He had heard the story from his father, he knew the price Kakashi had paid for his lone Sharingan eye. Kakashi had never said that name aloud, but Sasuke heard the echoes of it every time his teacher looked at him and saw another dark haired boy with red eyes.
Kakashi shook himself out of his depression and faked a wide smile, his eyes curving above his mask.
"You know, you guys are the first ones to ever pass my test? The others were selfish idiots who did whatever I said. You started off slow, but once you got it together, the three of you completely surpassed my expectations. So, congratulations, you passed! Staring tomorrow, you are all genin on Team 7 and under my command!"
"YEAH! I'm a ninja now! I'm awesome!"
Naruto's cheers were ended abruptly when Sakura's fist came down on his head.
"Don't you mean we're awesome? You didn't do it by yourself!"
"Haha! I know, I know! Your genjutsu was perfect, Sakura-chan! We totally took Kakashi-sensei by surprise!"
"Ah, well, Sasuke-kun was the one who taught it to me in the first place! And he led Kakashi-sensei into the trap we set up."
"Hmph!" Naruto crossed his arms and turned away sharply, obviously offended at the mention of Sasuke's existence.
That was perfectly fine with him. Sasuke had things to do anyway and they didn't include sitting around listening to his teammates squabbling about him.
"H-hey, Sasuke-kun, where are you going?" Sakura skipped over, her hands folded behind her as she leaned into his personal space. He guessed she was trying to be cute, but mostly it looked like she was about to trip and fall on her face. Sasuke actually found all of her yelling and hitting more tolerable, because it felt more genuine to him.
"I'm going to the Hokage tower like Kakashi told us to."
"Wait up for me, Sasuke-kun! I'll come too!"
"Just don't walk off like that, bastard! You could at least say bye or something!" Naruto snarled before turning to grin at the pink-haired girl trailing after Sasuke. "Hey, Sakura-chan!! After this do you want to go on a walk with me?"
"Ha! Dream on, Naruto!"
Glancing back, Sasuke was unsurprised to see that their teacher was still standing in front of the memorial stone. Kakashi was watching the three of them walk away with a thoughtful look in his eye.
Sasuke turned his attention back to the road and slipped his hands into his pockets. He took a moment to enjoy the sunshine warming his face and hair while Naruto and Sakura bickered back and forth on either side of him. In a minute or two, he would have to worry about reporting to the Hokage, the grocery shopping he needed to do, and hiring someone to give him an estimate for the repairs needed on the Uchiha district.
For right now though, he was content.
TBC... Thanks to everyone who's reviewed so far!