Notes: The fourth section is smut.
"Morning!" Sirius handed over Harry's cup while sipping from his own, then turned back to finish making Hermione's flat white.
"What are your plans for today?" Sirius swallowed and smiled as a clear thump sounded from upstairs. He set down the coffee and pointed up.
"Reining in the beast." Harry grinned.
"Ah, Misuse of Muggle Artifacts. Say hi to Arthur for me then." The Boy-Who-Lived made himself comfortable at the kitchen table, stealing the sports section as he did every alternate morning. Before he settled in to read, Harry noticed a large pile of letters. "What's this?"
Sirius glanced over. "Marriage Law letters. All of Hermione's suitors. Best not to disturb. We just finished sorting it all." Harry's scar crinkled as his brow furrowed.
"I'd have tossed all them out." Harry frowned at the name on the top envelope. Thorfinn Rowle. "Death Eaters are proposing to her now?" Sirius held out the flat white as Hermione flew into the kitchen in a whirlwind of sensible work attire and a delicate chiffon scarf. She grabbed it and plunked down on a chair, sorting through her black shoulder attache as her pumps floated in and fitted themselves on her outstretched feet.
"Aye. That's the reject pile, didn't make the cut. Not because they're Death Eaters mind you, just unacceptable according to the list." The list even had 'The List' printed in red capital letters.
"We didn't get to sending out her rejection letters yet." Hermione pulled out a yellow notepad and was busy scribbling something that couldn't wait long enough to finish her hair. Sirius started twisting her locks with practised ease before inserting bobby pins, and Harry grinned as he watched his godfather mumble through a mouth of metal strips. "Cutting it a bit close though. Only has, what, a month before they just pick someone for her." Hermione snorted.
"I don't have time for such nonsense. Not my fault silly purebloods can't mate without sharing 12.5% genetic material." Sirius finished the hairstyle with a gentle tap of his wand.
"Yes, dear. We're all sisterfuckers." The pen and notepad got shoved into her bag, and she carefully felt her hair before smiling with approval.
"Well, if you weren't, I wouldn't be hounded about my marital status." Sirius sighed and thanked Waffle for the steaming plate of scrambled eggs and bacon. He took his seat and watched Hermione eat a piece of toast, her wand flicking steadily to fold floating rejection letters, as Harry expounded on his latest imaginary adventure with Teddy Lupin.
The last Marauder felt rather content. The woman of his nightly wet dreams lived a floor above him, and he test trialed magic-powered motor vehicles for a living. It hadn't been hard to fall into a routine. He knew it wasn't part of Hermione's plan to continue living with him; she had certainly expected more women of nightly entertainment. But Sirius easily gave up his tomcatting for quiet nights of reading together. He woke up with dirty sheets either way. Though the last five months of avalanching Marriage Law mail kept them busy, meticulously eliminating candidates with her bloody List of required husbandly properties. The brilliant Hermione Granger was too thick for subtle wooing.
Hermione could feel her hair starting to fall out of the pins and whatever charm Sirius had used. She sighed at the clock It was rather late in the evening and impressive that most of the pins were still in their original configuration. The successful meeting had resulted in Nott moving their launch date up by a month, tripling the usual paperwork. Hermione put down her quill and stretched a foot out to nudge a mumbling Sirius with her toe. He looked tired, and switched hands to write while stretching the other out from a cramp.
"Time to pack it in, I think." Sirius brightened at her words and almost bounced up. He pulled her in with an arm about her waist and pecked her cheek before side-along apparating them to the house.
"Alright, out with it. You've behaved all day without excessive complaining. What do you want?" Sirius cocked an eyebrow at her.
"Darling, I'm hurt. To think that I'm not always on my best behaviour."
Another pin popped out of her hair, and in a moment of lunacy Hermione blew the falling hair from her eyes and said, "I'll do whatever you want, Sirius, just let me get to bed before morning." In that instant, the arm around her tightened and Hermione was pulled in against his firm chest. She also felt an equally firm nudge at her hip. His eyes darkened to a charcoal.
"Marry me." If not for his expression, Hermione would have pulled away with a laugh.
"You're serious."
"You pulled me out from the Veil, love. We even live together, you should know my name by now."
"No, you prat. The new marriages require fidelity and fertility charms. You can't possibly want to be stuck with one woman and a gaggle of children." He shrugged and his chest shifted against her nipples.
"I haven't had sex in a year and half. Enough bints claim their child to be mine, the idea has grown on me." He was serious. "And I fit your bloody List."
He actually did. She only had a month to decide either way, but Hermione refused to be married without some chemistry. Lesson learnt with the Ron fiasco. And she was curious about the hype around Sirius Black. Might as well be practical about it. Her life plan was pretty blown up with the Marriage Law as it is.
"I refuse to lay back and think of England for the rest of my life. If you and I are sexually compatible enough, then sure." Hermione thought the rumours couldn't possibly be true, but it would be interesting to find out.
Sirius couldn't help leaning in and kissing her softly. Hermione always kept her word, if she agreed then it was as good as an Unbreakable Oath; he still couldn't quite believe it.
"Tomorrow then. There's not enough hours until sunrise to prove how good we'll be."
Sirius had a plan. It was simple. Easy day of paperwork, home for a nice dinner, fuck her brains out, sneak a proposal in while she was screaming yes, get married. Simple. Until a section of the lab blew up, when a new employee couldn't keep his wand holstered near flammable liquids.
They got home at a decent hour since the entire floor had suffered from flaming debris. He groaned as he smelled the dinner Waffle had taken great pains to prepare, and the tiny fountain of chocolate fondue merrily bubbling on the coffee table. Waffle vibrated with excitement, bowed and disappeared. Hermione's shoes clacked against the floors behind him as she kicked them off. She rounded the bulk of Sirius and drew up short at the candles and roses. He watched the tension in her shoulders melt away as she breathed out,
"Oh, did you plan this Sirius? It's lovely." Hermione hesitated before leaning up to kiss him. "Maybe today won't be so horrible after all." And so started two hours of sheer hell. While they had thought provoking discussion, and didn't splatter chocolate everywhere, Sirius was confident his dick would split his pants at any moment. Mid sentence he yanked her in for a kiss with a growl.
Whatever jokes of dog slobber she had thought up were dashed in the furious passion attacking her mouth. Not one bit of magic and somehow they were naked in his bed, her fingers running across his tattoos, sliding into his hair. The air cooled his line of kisses trailing from her lips to her mound, and he settled in like a starving man.
Sirius couldn't remember the last time he could indulge. He was rather particular, and usually his past one-night stands were bent on riding his girthy cock. He thought Hermione's pussy was the prettiest thing. It was all neatly kept, and he briefly wondered if she'd ever wax for him, before he flicked his tongue against her clit. It was intoxicating. Her nectar, the little bucks and clenches, the sexy moans and bossy mutters of 'There! More, more, more! Swirl.' He had to remember not to lick up all her wetness when she orgasmed the first time. Sirius couldn't believe it was real, as he brought her up onto her hands and knees and entered heaven.
Hermione shrieked at the stretch and it was all he could do not to come, fighting against the Pavlovian reaction while heavily thrusting. His lip would likely be bloody by the end of this. Focus, focus, that's the spot. Oh, thank Merlin! Sirius felt her fluttering clench before letting himself blast her inner walls with semen.
She breathed deeply in slumber as he slipped the ring onto her finger. Sirius was barely able to spell them hastily clean, but was satisfied his Pavlovian reaction was conquered after Hermione screamed herself hoarse.
Hermione Black. Granger-Black? Black-Granger? Hermione Black sounded best.
He managed to get a good seven and a half hours of sleep before he woke up to a furious Hermione. Neither of them remembered the contraceptive spell.
They got married at ten in the morning.
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