Whee!!!! Hello there, peeps!!! Thanks for the reviews, again! I looooove you all! Anyhoo, I think that's all I can say, besides that Valentine's Day was particularly lousy for me. I almost got banned from the computer!!! *pouts* But I didn't. *grins* So I was able to indulge myself in slashy goodness. Yey! *waves little Harry/Draco flag around* Slynedel, FINISH YOUR GODDAMN FIC!!! Umm... Ok, then...

Formalities:

-Don't own 'em, but wish (in the name of peanut-buttered Oreos™) that I did.

-This is SLASH. Don't go blaming/flaming me for not making some squicky Harry/Cho fic instead.

~*SWISS!!!*~

***

Silver eyes scanned a piece of parchment, lazily, not caring exactly what the potion was supposed to do. At the same time, he was trying to pay no attention to the disturbing appearance

~*MONSTER!!!*~

of his partner.

"He ain't that distressed."

A hushed voice piped up, amidst the almost inaudible chatter in the room. Students were all absorbed in their work, discussing the potion's ingredients and preparation instructions. Nobody heard Mr. Malfoy's unusual conversation with a band of metal.

Draco looked at the bracelet and cocked his head to the side.

"Oh really?"

"He~ll yeah! He's just— oh, eww!"

"What's 'eww'?"

"Sick, sick, sick!!!"

"What's sick?"

The armlet seemed to shudder, then a noise strangely reminiscent of somebody taking a deep breath was heard.

"Snape. In. Lingerie."

Malfoy choked, obviously nauseated.

"Ugh."

"Green negligee, at that… With be~lls."

He blanched, "TMI, thank you…"

"You're wayl~come."

He closed his eyes tightly, muttering about 'not wanting to see the world from Harry's point of view. Ever.' Then reopened them after clearing some spectacular mental images from his perturbed mind. And also after he heard peculiar banging sounds from his left.

Bang.

Bang.

Bang.

People stared at Harry, who kept his head steadily colliding with the table.

Bang.

Bang.

Bang.

His friends were apparently too shocked to do anything.

The blond shot the piece of jewellery a questioning glance, and it simply replied, "He's in denial."

The banging unexpectedly stopped, as if Harry had decided to listen.

"Denial? What about?"

"How gooooorgeous he thinks you are."

"He thinks I'm gorgeous?"

"Like a go~d!"

"Specify."

"Adonis. Nooo, wa~yt—Narcissus."

"Hey!"

"He thinks yer quite va~in, but still a 'bloody handsome git'."

"Ah.

Draco grinned, a devious look passing fleetingly over his features, and leaned towards the brunette next to him. Almost brushing his lips against the other's ear, he whispered.

"Is that right?"

There was a muffled 'no' coming from Golden Boy, who's head was now inertly connected to the desk.

"He's in de~nial, remember?"

Carved lips quirked up in a smirk.

"But he thinks you have an irresistible voice…"

Another mumble of protest.

"And beautiful eyes."

"How beautiful?"

"Enough to get him sickeningly poetic."

A loud 'Never!' was said through gritted teeth.

The Slytherin rolled his eyes.

"De-ni-al…"

"Yep."

The Boy Who Lived

~*Stupid™*~

shook his head vigorously, indicating his disagreement. But that only provoked the bracelet into doing some sort of dance and twirl on Harry's wrist and chirping in a singsong voice.

"He wants to seduce you, Drakkie!"

"Drakkie?"

"Drakkie."

"Seduce me?"

"Mm~Hmm!"

Draco placed a delicate finger on his rival's thigh and traced a gentle circle on it. Potter shivered educing a chuckle from him.

"Well, well, well…"

"…Shag you…"

He caressed it some more and he could have sworn he heard the other boy moan softly.

"Shag me… Heh."

"He wants to pin you to the classroom floor with kisses."

"Why won't he?"

"Snape. And he's a bit lost, too."

"Ah."

"And has no tact whatsoever when addressing precious magical objects. The nerve of him. I am not a deformed toenail clipper!"

"No, you definitely aren't."

There was a snort and Harry raised his head a bit.

"Ooh, siding with an inanimate object, eh? I suppose you've gone stark raving mad? It took you long enough, what with hanging around with those."

He gestured towards Crabbe, Goyle, and then Pansy.

~*Goldi-slut and the Two Half-brains*~

"It helps me humiliate you."

"Fuck you."

Draco suddenly grabbed his enemy's chin, forcing him to look into his eyes.

"Be my guest."

Harry's breath got caught in his throat, then, abandoning all sense, he pulled the blond into a searing kiss.

The other boy pulled away instantly, surprised. But in the process, he knocked their bubbling cauldron of the desk and spilled its (made beforehand) contents all over the floor.

The whole class, which was previously oblivious to the going-ons with Harry and Draco, were now looking at the two intently.

They watched in… horror (I think? Or maybe awe… or shock?) as ice formed over it (meaning the floor!) immediately, and soon the dungeons were at least three degrees colder than before.

Oh, so that's what the potion does!

Draco looked very distressed, but not as much as his partner, who moaned and buried his head in his hands.

"I so did not do that…"

***

Bad, worse, or worst? Worst? Hah! I knew it! Am I psychic or what? Hehe. R&R? As usual, I wouldn't mind if you didn't, but would be very happy if you did.