The next few days flew by as the Weasley twins and the rest of their year had their first taste of each different lesson. They experienced: Charms where Fred managed to float a tomato but lost control and ended up shooting it across the room so that it hit Professor Flitwick slap bang in the middle of his forehead; Astronomy, where they studied the sky using telescopes at midnight or at least they would have done if George hadn't fallen asleep half way through the lesson, woken with a jolt, kicked out his leg, which resulted in him launching the telescope across the room where it hit Fred slap bang in the middle of his head; Herbology; where the twins combined their efforts and somehow managed to kill most of the plants in Greenhouse One within half an hour and Care of Magical Creatures, where they completely failed to show any of the natural talent for the subject that their brother Charlie had, although they did manage to help Hagrid's poorly dog, Fang, back onto its feet, unfortunately this was due to the fact that Fred had accidentally trod on its tail causing it to bolt away in pain, knocking George over as it headed towards the forest.
The lessons they had been looking forward to most both fell on the Thursday: Defence Against The Dark Arts and Potions.
"Brilliant," said Fred as they trundled into the room, which had many portraits of vampires, werewolves, banshees and other dangerous creatures hung on the walls.
"I can't wait," admitted George as he sat down between Lee and Fred, all three were sitting eagerly at the front of the class with their wands ready. Looking around they saw that they weren't the only ones, everyone was sitting forward on the edge of their seats, either staring at all the portraits or flicking through the first few pages of their books.
"Welcome students welcome," said a friendly voice, the students looked to the back of the room to see their new teacher step boldly into the room, "I'm Professor Quirrell, and it's my duty to start you off down the path of Defence Against the Dark Arts."
He covered the distance to the front of the room is a few easy strides, then turned to face the class of Gryffindors with a wide smile on his face.
"By the time you leave these hallowed halls you will have learnt how to deal with Vampires, Zombies, Trolls and Giants," he pointed to each of the creatures represented by the portraits, "as well as a curses, counter-curses, hexes and sickleworths."
"Er… what's a sickleworth?" asked Lee equally as confused as the rest of the class.
"About twenty nine knuts," answered Quirrel before laughing at his own joke, "I always find a quick gag breaks the ice nicely with my new students," he explained to the bemused class, "now, I'm sad to say, that before you can go around with your wands firing off counter-curses and hexes left and right we have to cover a lot of theory work. So wands away and turn to chapter one: the fundamentals of Dark Arts Defence and begin reading."
Fred, George and the rest of the class slowly began to read quietly to themselves, while Quirrel gradually paced around the room going to each student in turn and talked briefly to them. Eventually he filtered down to the front of the class where the twins and Lee were sitting.
"And that means that you three must be Lee Jordan, Fred and George Weasley," Quirrell said looking down at his register, ticking them off.
"That's us," agreed Fred looking up from his book eagerly, "so what's it like being involved in the Dark Arts?"
"Well to be honest," admitted Quirell, "I've only ever studied the Dark Arts, you know, learnt the theory but I've arranged it with Dumbledore to take a year off next year."
"What are you going to do?"asked Lee animatedly.
"I've got it all planned out," explained Quirrel excitedly, "I'm going to travel all over the world to areas that are rife with the Dark Arts and I'll use my extensive knowledge to help out the people there."
"Wow," said George impressed, "I'm mean aren't you worried about…well all that?" he waved his hand over the portraits of beasts.
"Oh no," said Quirrel shaking his head, "I think it's all rather exciting, I've read all the books I can on the subject so I've sure if I'm confronted with a Zombie or the like I'll be more then able to cope with the situation. I wanted to travel after I had left Hogwarts of course, but mother wasn't really keen on the idea so I started work as a researcher for the Ministry, and then luckily I managed to be made a professor here. I must say I'm really looking forward to getting out there, its so frightfully thrilling."
"What do you think?" whispered Lee as Quirrel made his way back to his desk.
"To be honest," said George, "I think when he heads out into the big wide world, he is going to get eaten alive."
Fred looked up at the closest portrait that showed a snarling werewolf with huge teeth, "you know I think that might be a very real possibility George."
The first year Gryffindors filed out of the room at the end of the lesson, everyone a little disappointed with not having actually performed any magic. The twins traipsed outside the school to have a wander around the grounds during the break, Lee had to rush back to their dormitory to collect his Potions book, and they were absentmindedly talking about their first impressions of Hogwarts as the strolled along.
"HA, caught you!" screeched a voice, making the twins jump wildly.
"Oh hello Mr Filch," said Fred calming down.
"Who are you talking to?" asked a puzzled George looking over his shoulder.
"Don't act all innocent with me, I knew what you were trying to do?" Filch sneered waving an accusing finger at the two of them, "you were sneaking off into the forest."
The two twins looked around themselves and for the first time actually took in where they were, just a few paces ahead of them was the start of the forest, a dark thicket of trees meant that they could only see a little way in.
"See," cackled Filch gleefully, "going into the forest after you had been told not too, you'll get a big punishment for that," he looked longingly into the distance, "maybe they'll let me use the Rack."
"Er…sorry to spoil your fun there Mr Filch," apologised George breaking Filch's daydream, "but Fred and I haven't done anything wrong."
"Yet," added Fred.
"Well of course I meant 'yet'," pointed out George, "we aren't Percy are we?"
"Yes you have done something wrong!" Filch spat, "you were out of bounds!"
"No," corrected George, "if we had carried on walking without really looking then yes we would have been out of bounds."
"However," continued Fred, "because you jumped out at us you actually stopped us from breaking any school rules."
"But…" Filch stood there mouth open, finger still raised accusingly at the two.
"I mean thanks a lot Mr Filch," George said gratefully.
"Yeah, it was really kind of you to look out for us like that," nodded Fred.
"But… y-y-you were going out of bounds," whined Filch crestfallen.
"Quite possibly but now we'll never know. Of course, we'll have to repay you," admitted Fred before looking around suspiciously before beckoning Filch closer, "now normally I wouldn't tell tales on any fellow students, but I can't just let this happen."
"Let what happen?" responded Filch eagerly as all thoughts turned to punishing students once again.
"I overheard something this morning at breakfast," Fred continued keeping his voice low, while occasionally looking up and around to see if anyone else was listening in, "I think a couple of third years had a disagreement last night and they decided that the only they were going settle it was to have a wizard's duel."
"HA," said Filch triumphantly, "duels are against the rules."
"Shhhh," said Fred waving Filch into silence, "now I think that I heard them say that the duel was to take place during this break period."
"Damn," swore Filch looking back up to the castle, "they are probably doing it right now."
"Now I think that I heard them say," Fred placed a hand on Filch's shoulder and lowered his voice again, "that they were going to do it in one of the disused classrooms, number three I think."
"I've got them," said Filch eagerly, before grabbing Fred's hand and shaking it energetically, "I won't forget this you mark my words."
As he swiftly strode towards the school the twins could hear him muttering darkly to himself, "expelled that's what'll happen once I catch them…"
"Er…Fred?" asked George.
"Yes George," he replied innocently.
"Correct me if I am wrong but isn't classroom three where Charlie said that Peeves had put a bucket full of Stinkpellets above the door?"
"Did he?" smiled Fred before sticking a finger in his ear and giving it a wiggle, "you know I should really get something done about my hearing."
"Where's Filch going in such a hurry?" asked Lee who had got his Potion's book and had come back down to find the twins, "I doubt he has ever looked so happy."
"He has a date with destiny," informed Fred.
"Yep," smiled George, "or in the very least he has a date with a bath later."
"Come on we'd better get to Potions," said Lee, "you can tell me on the way."
"Right, we don't want to be late for Snape," nodded Fred, "Charlie says he is worse then McGonagall."
The three boys reached the Potion's class and slipped into the room, the Gryffindors had this lesson jointly with the first years from Slytherin House so it was already half full by the time they found some seats. The room was dark, and cold, mainly due to the fact that it was in the dungeons, it also had a strange musky smell, no doubt from all the jars and bottles of ingredients on the shelves and in the drawers.
"Any ideas what Professor Snape is like?" asked Lee wrinkling his nose at the unusual aroma filling the room.
"Well so far Bill, Charlie and Percy have all said that he is the meanest, cruellest and snidest teacher that they have ever had," explained George, "plus since he is Head of Slytherin he tends to only be nice to them."
"So I think we're in for a nice, laid back, fun filled lesson," said Fred smiling.
"Put you wands away, you won't be needing them here," said a cold voice softly from behind the class, the twins turned around and saw a tall dark manstanding in the doorway. Hehad long greasy black hair, a stretched hooked noseand an expression of pure contempt on his face as his gaze washed over the class.
Just then the patter of footsteps could be heard getting louder, and a few seconds later an out of breath Angelina appeared at the doorway opening.
"Sorry I'm late Professor," she gasped, "I had to go back for my book."
"If you can't be bothered to arrive at my class on time," Snape said coolly, "then I can't be bothered in teaching you, make sure to be here promptly next week," he went to close the door with Angelina still outside it.
"But what about today's lesson?" she asked incredulously.
"There will be plenty of time for you to go over what you missed in detention," and with that he slammed the door shut in her face, turning back around he looked that the stunned class, "I believe I said to put your wands away."
The first years quickly grabbed their wands and stowed them in their robes as Snape strode down to the front of the class, he stood behind a very large bubbling cauldron and faced the class, surveying them with his cold black eyes.
"You are here to learn the noble art of Potion making," he whispered softly, he face lit by the flickering light of the candles and cauldron fire in the room, "it is an exact science, requiring patience, timing, and attention to detail. For these reasons there are very few that show a more then average ability in this subject, for those that are adept," he gaze swept across the majority of Slytherin's in the class when he said this, "I will be able to teach you how to survive poisons, brew strength, and defeat your enemies without having to mutter a single incantation. As for the rest of you," his eyes glided over to the Gryffindor tables and stared down at the Weasley twins, "I'm sure you'll do much better in the lessons where you need to gesture wildly with your wands."
Snape put everyone in the room into pairs, expect Lee who had no one to be partners with since Angelina hadn't been allowed in, and set them the task of making a simple sleeping potion. Well, Snape had said it was simple, but from looking at the instructions on the board it was actually quite complex, especially considering it was their first lesson. As they were cutting and slicing ingredients Snape stalked through the pairings watching them preparing their potions, snapping criticisms at practically all of the Gryffindors while praising his own Houses students.
"Admirable work," as he examined one cauldron belonging to two Slytherin first years, he stepped over to look in Fred and Georges. Despite the fact that they had followed the instructions perfectly and the liquid within had gone completely clear exactly how it was suppose to, all Snape said was, "adequate."
At the end of the lesson one person from each pair brought a sample up to the top of the class for Snape to give to a bunch of rabbits that he had brought in. Most of them work, with varying degrees of success, some of the rabbits would stumble around woozily before lying down and nodding off, Lee's on the other hand turned all the rabbit's fur purple before it passed out.
"Foolish boy," sneered Snape, "clearly, you added the whole stem of the Strophanthus plant rather then just the tips."
Only two samples worked perfectly, the one from the twins and the one from Rachel Mungra and Stanley Bickerstaff, both Slytherins.
"Excellent," as Snape gave one rabbit a sip from the vial, which sent it instantly to sleep, "Bickerstaff, Mungra, a house point each I think. For your homework I want two feet of parchment on the potion you have just made."
"I can't believe he didn't award us any House Points?" Fred complained as they were walking out of the class, Lee had been made to stay back and clear away the ingredients, "ours worked just as good as theirs," nodding at the backs of the two departing Slytherin students.
"Ahh well I have something much better then any House Point," George smiled smugly before pulling out a small bottle containing a clear water like liquid.
"Is that some of our potion?" asked Fred.
"Yep, I bottled some when Snape wasn't looking, thought it might come in useful to have some around," George pocketed it as they made their way up the stairs to the ground floor, "maybe we should offer it to Percy as a concentration potion for when he is studying."
"Urgh," Fred grimaced and held his hand up to his nose, "what in Merlin's beard is that stench?"
"YOU!"
George and Fred managed to turn enough to see that the shouting voice came from a rather ripe smelling Filch before he grabbed both by their collars and dragged them down the corridor with him. Within minutes the twins had found themselves back in the familiar surroundings of Filch's office.
The twins stood there in silence, trying not to breath into much as Filched pulled a kettle out from the fire, poured it into a teapot and threw some tea leaves in as well. This accomplished, he went to his file cabinet and pulled out Fred and George's ones, which he slammed down hard on his desk before sitting down and staring at them malevolently.
"So… did you catch them?" asked Fred innocently.
"NO I DIDN'T," shouted Filch spraying spit everywhere, "I went to classroom three and you know what I found instead of duelling students?"
"Some kind of cake?" guessed George, "possibly chocolate."
"You know what I found cos you put it there!" stated Filch firmly.
"You left him a cake in classroom three?" questioned Fred as turned to his brother, "it's a bit of a strange place to leave a cake."
"Stinkpellets!" shouted Filched red with rage, "a hold load of Stinkpellets, I got covered in them."
"Why would you cover yourself in Stinkpellets?"asked Fred frowning, "if you didn't want George's cake you could have just said no, it seems a bit of an extreme thing to do."
"I didn't do it!" Filch snarled, "they were in a bucket on top of the door."
"And you think we had something to do with it?" asked George.
"No I don't think," Filch spat pointing at the two of them, "I know it."
Filch grabbed a quill, dunked it into the inkwell as he pulled open Fred's file first, and started to scribble away on the parchment.
"Since you are updating our diary," Fred said breezily, "could you add in Lee's birthday?"
"It's the twenty second of November," a helpful George cut in, "we're gonna get him something nice."
"If you want you can come in with us on something," added Fred, "we can split it three-ways then."
Filch's eye's bulged and he looked as though he was about to explode, luckily before he could do so Professor Flitwick knocked on the door.
"Yes?" asked Filch gruffly.
"I'm sorry to disturb you Mr Filch," said Flitwick in his high voice, "but I thought you should know."
"Know what?" queried Filch distractedly as he carried on writing on Fred's file.
"Well it seems that Peeves has got hold of a supply of Stinkpellets."
The sound of the quill scratching against the parchment stopped, "Stinkpellets?"
"Yes, he placed them in a bucket over my door, I got absolutely covered," Flitwick pulled at the shoulder of his robes and gave them a sniff, "hence the smell. I was just wondering if you could check some of the other rooms while I go and take a bath to get rid it."
Flitwick disappeared from the doorway and Filch looked up from his desk at the twins who were now grinning from ear to ear.
"You can wipe those stupid smiles off your faces for a start," he said standing up and grabbing a broom that was leaning against the wall, "just because you didn't do it doesn't mean you won't get punished. You still sent me to that room knowing what would happen."
"I'll deal with you two later," he warned striding to the door, when he reached it he turned around and glared at them menacingly, "don't think you have got away with this, it'll be added to your report when I get back and I'll be keeping a close eye on the pair of you."
"You know George," pondered Fred as the two twins were now left alone in the room, "I think we have a friend for life there."
"I think you are right there brother," agreed George, "but you know what?"
"What?"
"Our dear friend seems very very stressed out," George said sympathetically, "what he could do with is a nice rest," George pulled out the bottle of sleeping potion, pulled out the stopper and emptied the contents into the teapot.