Disclaimer: I don't own anything related to Disney, least of all Zootopia (yet)

No matter how close two mammals are to each other, there will always be new distances between them. This stays true for an entire lifetime and the trick is to learn to love these distances as well.

As they allow you to rediscover each other anew.

Limits and Potential

The video continued and Judy started holding her breath subconsciously.

Nick looked into the camera somewhat sheepishly when he continued,"but this is not really easy for me."

He paused for a moment and looked straight into the camera as if he was searching for something. Something that wasn't there. And it felt like he was staring straight into her eyes before he broke 'eye-contact' by chuckling.

"You know, this is my twelfth attempt at trying to say this and it seems to get harder every time."

He put his head into his paws and gave a sigh.

"Aww...what the hell!"

He slapped his paws against the side of his muzzle as if he was trying to wake himself up before he hammered them down onto the desk. The impact of his fists startled Judy and she almost missed the look of steely determination on Nick's muzzle when he said.

"I love you Judy!"

There was a pause where Nick just stared at the desk while Judy's brain was still busy trying to understand the words which Nick had utter just seconds ago.

Had he just...?

Judy looked at the screen intently as if Nick might give a hint as to what he had just said.

She was sure that she might have misunderstood since she had been prepared for the absolute worst.

Did Nick just confess to her?

The fact that Nick seemed rather down made it hard to tell and she wondered if she had just been imagining things.

Maybe she was going insane as her mind was protecting her from the bad news that he had uttered instead.

That was a possibility right?

She was still confused when Nick finally continued.

"There I said it, I love you, and I really mean it, I do."

He said with sadness in his eyes.

Why was he so sad?

"I realized it a few days after you went away."

There was another sigh but he straightened his shoulders and continued.

"And at first I thought that maybe I was just being sentimental. That you leaving made me reevaluate your worth to me. And I thought that it would go away."

Judy's heart was pounding harder than it ever had before in her life as she watched Nick who was currently silent once more.

"But it didn't. And so I started building this machine."

He gestured into the rough direction where she knew that the machine was located in the room.

"So that I could communicate with you. So that I could send you messages and make you happy."

It was now that his eyes actually teared up and that was not fair thought Judy as her eyes started doing the same.

"But then I realized that you would never be able to actually send anything back. That I would never know if you actually received anything because I would already be long gone when you receive these messages."

Nick sniffed and wiped his eyes with the back of his paws before he continued, and Judy was sure that he was really close to crying.

"And that was okay, because even if I never get to know if you are happy, I have to at least try. Because I love you and you deserve being happy."

He was now back to staring intently at the camera.

"And I want you to know that no matter what happens I will always send you messages even if you might never see them. Even if you stopped caring, because you know that I am already dead. There is still that chance that you want to see my messages and that is enough."

Now it was Judy's turn to wipe her eyes.

How could he even think that she would stop caring about her best friend?

She would never do that!

A tear started rolling down her cheek.

Even if he was already dead.

"But that is not why I am so scared of this or why this whole thing is so hard on me."

He looked down onto the desk as if looking her in the eyes was something he would like to avoid when he said.

"And I caught myself thinking that I wish I wouldn't love you. Just so that I do not have to fear."

He sighed once more and Judy wondered.
What was it that Nick was fearing?

"I know that there are two possibilities. Either you love me back or you do not. And to me...both are equally terrifying."

She could see that he finally started crying as well.

"Because if you do love me then you might be sad because we can not be together. And even though I want to be there and make you happy, I can't."

Judy knew exactly what Nick felt and to her that made the whole situation even more heartbreaking.

She just wanted to be there, by his side, and hug him so that she could tell him that she loved him as well and that everything would be okay.

"And if you don't, well I do not have to explain that do I?" He said before breaking down into a sad mess.

For Judy it was just too much to watch. But like when watching a horrible accident there was no way for her to take her eyes of.

The video went on for a few more minutes before Nick found the composure to end the message.

Which left Judy on her own with her feelings.

Her sadness, her fears and her regrets.

For the first time since she had started working on this new planted she called in sick and stayed in her room for a week as she dealt with her love sickness. She felt outright lethargic and did not even open the messages that Nick sent her.

Because she knew that if Nick was feeling as bad as she was, then watching him break down once more would most certainly break her.

And after being a bed for a whole week she slowly started to get back to work.

Jack would ask her what exactly had been wrong with her but she just evaded the topic as much as possible.

Once she was confidently back to form she also started watching Nick's messages again. She saved that messages that she had not watched yet in a folder that she labeled:

'Deal with Later'

Nick actually went back to normal in his latest messages and it was like the incident from two weeks ago had never really happened.

Life was pretty peachy for Judy once more, the harvest was plentiful this year and Gazelle brought out a new album which Nick sent to her in his usual spread out way.

Yeah life was decent once more and Judy knew that Nick loved her which made everything that he did that much sweeter for her.

But it also made what happened about a year later hurt even more.

It was a relatively normal day and Judy returned to her room to watch Nick's daily video message.

So here she was on her bed with the datapad in her paws ready to click play.

And there he was taking his place behind his desk like always.

Judy wondered if he would ever figure out how to start a recording without standing behind the camera. And the thought that Nick was smart enough to figure out how to send video messages across the stars, but not smart enough to use a remote for his camera was incredibly funny to her.

Nick had his signature smirk on his muzzle when he greeted her.

"Hey there Carrots! How are you doing?"

There was a pause when he shifted to a more comfortable sitting position.

"I am sure you are killing it over on your end."

And Nick was right, she was actually doing pretty decently.

Not only was the harvest good but Katy was having her first litter together with another tiger named Ron. Which was not that special all on it's own, but the thing that was special was the fact that Judy would be a godmother for one of the cubs once it was born.

And she sure hoped that she would do a good job. She had no idea how to be a role model for a tiger but she would figure something out.

"Something really surprising has happened here on my end since the last message I sent you." Nick said happily and his smirk turned into a genuine smile.

Judy's mind immediately focused one hundred percent on the video once she heard that.

What kind of surprise would make Nick react like that?

It sure was nice to see him that happy and seeing him this happy made her smile as well.

"I am sure that you remember Emily from high school?"

Judy felt like her insides were suddenly turning into hot lead.

And she had a dreadful idea where this conversation might be going.

Her smiled turned into a frown when she remembered Emily.

Emily was a vixen that had transferred into their high school one day and she also had been put into their class.

Judy still remembered the immediate hatred that she had felt for the beautiful vixen when she had first laid eyes on her.

And that was for one simple reason, they were in high school and Judy had heard from her older siblings how easily friends could stop being friends once one of them got into a relationship. Especially if the mammals in question were male and female.

Not to mention predator and prey.

So when Judy had seen Emily she had immediately thought this vixen would steal Nick away from her.

Which was stupid since Nick had not shown interest in her once for the whole duration of high school.

But this had not mattered to past Judy.

She still remembered the hidden rivalry between them, a rivalry which was kind of one sided, but a rivalry none the less.

She still remembered comparing herself to Emily at all times.

Be it about grades or sports or, yes, even beauty.

Which was really stressful since Emily had been a real smart cookie. This therefore made her one of the reasons why Judy's stubbornness made her a great student and in a way she was thankful for that.

The funnier thing to look back on must have been the beauty thing though.

Judy was now far more secure about her looks.

But past Judy, teenage Judy, had not been so sure.

And while Nick had never really cared to groom himself when he was a kit or even during the first half of high school.

Emily sure did!

Judy still remembered how she saw her fluffy tail for the first time and how she wondered if only female foxes had tails that puffy.

And how nice it would be if Nick had a tail with that much fluff, which he later did when he started actually taking care of himself.

But when Judy compared herself and thus inevitably her stubby rabbit tail to the young stylish vixen, well there was no way that could end well.

So the answer was yes, she did still remember Emily.

And while she wished that past Judy had been less hostile towards her, since future Judy was sure that they could have been great friends.

Judy also still wished that Emily would back the hell off from Nick.

"I meet her at a coffee shop during lunch break yesterday and we had time to catch up."

Nick said with that dreamy look on his muzzle that made Judy want to punch him in the gut.

How dare he feel that way about another female, she thought angrily.

Nick you are mine you are supposed to love me...forever, her mind added and she felt a little bit sad.

"And she asked me whether you and me got together."

Judy's eyes went wide.

She did?

Why would she do that?

Why would she think that in the first place?

"And I told her that you are taking part in the Genesis program. And that I only found out that I loved you after you left."

Judy was confused.

He had told her all that?

Maybe there was nothing going on after all?

Dumb bunny why do you have to jump to conclusions like this?

She was still mentally scolding herself when Nick went on.

"And she told me that she had a huge crush on me in high school."

"I KNEW IT!" Judy exclaimed as all her teenage fears were validated in one sentence.

Good job past Judy!

You showed that roach who's boss.

"But she never dared to get between you and me because she knew that we were destined for each other."

This conversation was a literal rollercoaster for Judy.

Emily had known that they belonged together before they even knew?

How?

And why would that stop her from trying to get Nick for herself?

Hadn't she told him that she had loved him back then?

"I think she might actually be the right one." Nick said somewhat happily somewhat reluctantly.

Judy looked at the screen as if she had just been slapped in the face. And for a moment there she actually wanted to just turn of the video and cry.

But she didn't, she didn't and Nick continued.

"I actually think she might accept the fact that I will never love her as much as I love you. And that she will stay with me regardless and love me for who I am."

Judy wondered if she could feel any more confused than this.

"And you know what Judy?"

Her heart was not sure what to think at this moment. Part of her wanted to be angry that Nick might be dating Emily and that she could do nothing about that.

Another part of her was happy that Nick considered her number one, that he loved her the most.

But how long would that last?

And another part of her melted away happily when she heard him say her name. It was funny to her how happy he could make her just with that one thing.

"I will give dating someone else a try. Just like I said back when I confessed my feelings to you. If I don't try, I might actually go insane from having nobody by my side."

He looked at her with a somewhat saddened impression and Judy wondered when he had said that thing about dating someone else. Until she remembered the messages that she had not even watched until this day.

"I am sorry if I am hurting you with this. And I hope that you can forgive me for trying to feel better after you left. And if you cannot forgive me that is understandable, since I am a horrible friend who says I love you and then finds another female to go out with."

Judy felt guilty, she understood what his angle was. He wanted someone to be with and to have someone he could share his love with who was physically there. Someone who would love him back. But he wanted to also make sure that this mammal understood that he loved her, which was really stupid to be honest since she doubted that he would be able to find a mate this way.

And yet she was angry at him for trying, even if it was her fault that put him in this position in the first place.

If she had not left then they would be happily living together and Nick would love her and they would adopt kits and...and Judy had now officially brought herself to cry.

She almost did not notice his last words while the tears streamed down her cheeks while she wondered what could have been.

"But maybe I am being stupid and you are actually happy for me. I mean you are the greatest mammal I have ever known and you always try your best to make everyone happy. If anyone can find it in their heart to forgive me and support me then that mammal is most definitely you."

Judy felt another sting where her heart was and the tears would not stop flowing.

That was not fair Nick!

How can you think of me this way?

How can I be that pure and good in your eyes when I am this selfish and petty?

"Whatever option it may be Judy, I love you and I will always love you regardless! So have sweet dreams and sleep well." He said with a smile that was just as happy as the one that he had started out with.

The video ended there and thus left a somewhat sad and confused Judy behind.

Authors Note:

Damn did I have little time to write this chapter. This also means that I did not have the time to proof read as much as I usually do (I usually read it 3 times).
I only went over this once and that means there might be more mistakes than usual, deal with it.
And I sure do hope that I can wrap this up in the next chapter.
AT: Metal Amadeus, first of all I could not find out what a 'Hatiko pose' is therefore I dont know how to react to that. Thanks for being concerned times are actually pretty hard for me and I might need to stop writing all together. As for the challenge I hope I can win with the next Chapter since this one was not that sad.
AT: Guest, you saw that I can just hope that I wont again.
AT: Jackel Skyhawk thanks for those kind words. As I said the end shall hopefully come soon.
AT: Tantio all good options and I was tempted to throw the smell thing in there somewhere but I'd like to think that Nick secretly has some things from Judy back in his home that he keeps around for comfort. He would never tell Judy though.