Sorry for the eye strain.
-Chapter 3-
Night
Robin had texted Zoro a series of rules and instructions to follow. And although Zoro had said he would take each order to heart and without question, lo and behold; he asked question.
"I'm to give him an extra two if he complains about the pain?" Zoro had asked via a text. Of course, it wasn't written exactly that way. "Isn't that a bit too much?" mind you, Robin had said to give him two immediately following the soak, and then have some bandages wrapped around the soles of his feet. Two and two made four, which was quite a bit considering the dosage of the medication.
"He'll hopefully be asleep, and won't have to take extras," Robin texted back. The words were all spelled correctly and were not abbreviated into regular text slang, whatsoever.
"Didn't you say to keep an eye on him while he slept," Zoro continued to question. "And why would I have to keep an eye on someone who's asleep? I doubt he's lost that much blood."
"It's not him falling asleep that I'm worried about," Robin replied back.
"What is it then?"
Instead of an answer, he received, "have him sleep in the guest room."
"That's my room," Zoro had text angrily as he waited outside the bathroom. And he made sure Robin knew he was angry too; he made a frowny face using the keypad.
"No, your dorm-room is your room," Robin had replied. "Only during weekends and holidays is the guest room your room."
"My stuff is in there," Zoro hastily text back.
"I doubt material goods matter much to him at the moment," was what he read soon after.
"How can you be so sure?"
Thievery was not uncommon. How was he supposed to trust someone he hardly knew? Robin wasn't telling him enough, and there were some pretty personal items in that room. Whatever he couldn't take to his dorm was kept in that room, and he would hate to discover those precious goods of his gone.
He really would.
But Robin never text him back on the answer. Not after ten minutes, or eleven minutes, or after that; and it brought Zoro to the conclusion that she either really enjoyed to watch him writhe in frustration, or she couldn't come to an answer herself. And as much as Zoro wanted to believe the second, he knew it was more likely toward the first.
That, or she was busy teaching class.
And so, about twenty minutes of silence between both men, Zoro pulled the drain and let the dirtied water sink through. He washed his hands thoroughly as he let Sanji place a few soft sheets on his raw soles, making the occasional glace at the reddened flesh as fingers delicately tried to wrap a layer of medical bandages around it.
Zoro wanted to say something, especially since he could tell Sanji was stressed over the possibility of having to deal with losing a limb, seeing that he was stumbling with wrapping his feet up, as well as having a very strained expression on his face. He refrained, telling himself that Sanji must have done something to get himself in that situation. Only an idiot would walk around barefoot in this weather. Zoro had gone out shirtless, in those attempts to better his inner strength, but even he knew that there were limits to the human body.
After washing his hands for several minutes, thank god Sanji was to busy to have noticed this, he came to see that the silence between the two of them was not working out.
He wasn't sure what had bothered Sanji so much about his question, other than Sanji doing something really stupid to get himself in this position, but watching him trying to wrap his bloody feet made Zoro feel a tad…emotional.
It was a pathetic sight to behold.
"You're leaving it too loose," Zoro muttered nonchalantly. He made sure he was looking away from the blonde direction when saying this. "You don't want bacteria grouping up…you need it nice and tight."
He heard Sanji move around a bit on the seat. Zoro continued to look off and pretend he really didn't care about Sanji's sad attempt to bandage himself.
"It needs air, doesn't it?"
Zoro glanced over at the blonde.
"Not when there's a chance of skin rot," he replied.
Sanji's face paled as he looked down to his feet. Zoro watched the blonde move his toes, tightening and releasing his muscles over and over again.
"I can move them," Sanji retorted dryly.
"It's not that simple," Zoro said, frowning at the blonde.
"They can feel," Sanji said. His tone was a bit more desperate.
"Still, it's not that simple," Zoro said again. He removed himself from the wall that he had been leaning on and leaned over down to Sanji. He faced the nervous blonde, and then brought his gaze down to the blondes poorly covered feet. "You can feel because of muscle pressure…but there may be nerves that are beyond repair."
"It might be a small amount," he heard the blonde mutter. Zoro looked up at Sanji and smirked.
"Or it could be a lot," he replied in a cocky tone. "That's why you have to wait several hours before coming to any sort of conclusion…unless you were to go to the hospital."
Zoro watched the thing body move in a strange matter, as though the very thought made the blonde sick. He felt his smirk dwindle as he though about Sanji's current position. The blonde may very well be scared. Nobody wants to lose a limb, especially one you use to walk on. When he got down to it, he was being a real dick to Sanji. He barely knew the guy, and even though Sanji had appeared out of nowhere, made out with Robin, and refused to tell Zoro where the hell he came from and why his feet were so screwed up, he still didn't have a right to scare the fuck out of him.
"Hey…" Zoro said in a soft tone.
Sanji moved a bit, though he still seemed glued to the seat and his face to his bandaged appendages.
"I…I shouldn't have said that," Zoro said. He felt his face prickle with heat as he felt himself sink from embarrassment. "Sorry…"
Sanji looked over and stared at him, though he didn't respond to Zoro's apology. He soon turned his attention back to his damaged soles and bean unwrapping them.
"Do….you need help?" Zoro asked.
"No."
Zoro looked up and stared at the ceiling of the bathroom before letting his jaw clamp tight.
The man was difficult! There was absolutely nothing he could say to Sanji that would relieve any tension that had been created between the two of them since meeting. And it wasn't so much that Zoro wanted their meager excuse of a relationship to get better, because he figured he'd never see the blonde after today-tomorrow's tops-and therefore had no reason to be kind in the first place, as much as t was him wanting to just not have to deal with the poor attitude.
Obviously Sanji didn't want to make friends with him. Ok, he could live with that. And it was also obvious that the blonde didn't want to talk about his current situation, and Zoro understood that as well. If the blonde didn't want to talk about how he fucked up his feet, then fine by him.
But the awkwardness! The god awful silence that pushed Zoro down and made him grit his teeth in agony!
No human could naturally handle such a feeling. If this was taking place out in public, Zoro would have just left the blonde where he was, and would figure that another good soul out there would come to the blonde's aid. But this was not the case. He was stuck with this…person! He couldn't leave Sanji, not after promising Robin that he would watch over him, and he couldn't call anyone to help ease the tension either. Sanji was this responsibility that didn't want anything to do with him.
And then there was this obvious, blatant stupidity.
Why didn't Sanji want to go to the damn hospital? What reasonable human risked losing a limb when there was wonderful medicine and twenty first century technology? Yeah, it was frostbite, but any good doctor in the city could probably save the foot.
It wasn't so much that Zoro was frustrated with Sanji's unwillingness to not give an explanation to why his feet were such a mess. He just wanted to know why he wasn't being driven to the hospital right now. Why didn't Robin take him to the emergency room? She, of all people, should have known better.
"Are you legal," Zoro asked suddenly.
Subtleness had never been Zoro's forte.
This actually got the blondes attention, which was no real surprise. Zoro had an eye glaring at him with a mixture of repulse and confusion within a matter or seconds after asking that question.
"What," Sanji asked. Zoro couldn't find a word to describe the tone in Sanji's voice, and it made him surprisingly nervous.
Yes, that was a stupid question. A very stupid question and Zoro would admit that asking it was probably a bad idea and that he should have left it as a thought rather than just blurt it out like he did. But it sorta made since. What kind of guy walked around with an ID? And he was afraid to go to the hospital…right? He didn't want to go, that was for sure. Yeah, sure, there were people with actual phobias that feared hospitals for a various amount of reasons, but it really didn't add up well. Of course, Zoro didn't think about any of this when he had asked, all of this had just sprung up in his head now, but it did add to his defense.
Not that he would try to defend himself in this case.
"That…was a stupid question," Zoro said.
"Yes, it was," Sanji said, that offended look on his face still very apparent.
"Sorry." Zoro said, trying his best to redeem what little dignity he had left.
Sanji didn't say a thing. He continued to stare hard at the young man, his facial expression easing a bit as time moved on.
"Whatever," he finally muttered. He looked down at his feet and bunched himself up into a tight ball. He looked away from Zoro, keeping himself quiet as he silently thought to himself.
"So…Robin asked me to give you some medicine," Zoro said awkwardly. "You know, to help ease some of the pain you're probably in…?"
He watched the blonde continue to stare out into space. Zoro had a feeling much of what he was saying wasn't really reaching Sanji. Maybe drugs were involved. That could be another reason why Sanji didn't want to go to the hospital.
"I don't need any," Sanji said, getting up from the toilet seat. He flinched a bit, his face twisting in pain as he let his weight rest on his poorly bandaged feet. Even Zoro couldn't help but wince a bit as he watched the blonde stumble a bit from the shocking sensation.
"You look like you do," Zoro muttered, his eyes lowering down to the bathroom floor. "If you're not careful you'll bleed." He took a step closer to the blonde. "At least let me help you over to the bedroom…"
"I don't need the rest," Sanji said hastily. He lifted his hand made for the doorknob, his back to Zoro. "Just tell me where my stuff is…"
Zoro frowned. "You're not really just going to leave, are you?" He shook his head and made a nervous smile. "It's snowing; you have no money on you."
Sanji faced Zoro and produced a rather strained expression.
"I…can walk."
"Barely," Zoro said, his face showing more worry by the second. It wasn't that he was afraid of getting Robin upset by letting Sanji leave. No, Zoro had the ability to show human compassion as well. And the image of a pale, limping blonde in the increasingly bad weather made Zoro feel uncomfortable.
Nobody deserved to be in that weather in that condition….even if they came off as an asshole.
"Don't worry about it," Sanji said as he made his way out of the bathroom. Zoro stood there for a few seconds, letting the sight of the obvious limp settle in him before realizing that he might need to persuade the blonde to stay a bit longer.
"You'll ruin your feet," Zoro said as he hurried down the hall.
"I'm not too worried about that right now."
"It's fucking snowing," Zoro said, stopping at the entrance to the living room. He watched the blonde hurriedly put his coat on, his hands burying deep in his pockets as he huffed a bit and looked around frantically.
"Where are my shoes," Sanji asked, turning to Zoro.
"Your keys are on the table," Zoro pointed.
Sanji looked down at the coffee table and stared blankly at the keys lying on it. His visible eye then locked on back to Zoro, his expression turning dark as he lowered himself and grabbed the leys from the table.
"Shoes," Sanji hissed through his teeth.
"…they might have been left in Robin's car," Zoro lied. He made it his duty to keep his eyes away from the kitchen.
Sanji's jaw dropped, his chest heaving up and down at a faster pace.
"You should wait till she gets back," Zoro said, forcing himself o talk in a calm and slow tone. "I mean…you need to thank her…she did her best to fix up your frostbite. Just relax for now."
"I really need to go," Sanji said again. He stomped over to Zoro, his facial expression not changing despite the fact that he feet were red raw.
"I understand, but you can't just go out in your bare feet," Zoro said, crossing his arms, thinking of ways to make himself seem larger compared to the blonde. "Do you have somewhere you need to be?"
Sanji went silent again, lowering his head and, looking away from Zoro. He even went as far as taking a step back from Zoro.
Ok, now Zoro was getting desperate. Robin wouldn't tell him anything, and Sanji wouldn't tell him a damn thing either, and it was becoming more and more apparent that what he wasn't being told was something he ought to know.
Something that they didn't want him to know.
"What happened," Zoro asked.
"…"
"You're going to have to tell me something," Zoro said in an almost threatening tone. "That is…if you want to get whoever you want to go."
Sanji seemed a bit taken aback by this. But within moments of Zoro's remark, his expression eased a bit and Sanji went back to the same angered look it had been since realizing Zoro went through his belongings.
"And why should I tell you anything," he asked Zoro.
And Zoro felt pretty confident of himself once Sanji had asked this. In fact, a small part of him had hoped for Sanji to not cooperate just so he could answer the question. Because, being that Zoro was desperate for some light on the matter at hand, he figured complying with Sanji would get him the answers he wanted. And even though curiosity killed the cat, satisfaction supposedly brought it back to life, so Zoro figured that getting the answer he wanted, while offering up an ultimatum that may have unsettled Robin, he was sure things would work out to his advantage.
"I have a car," Zoro answered.
And like magic, Sanji's expression lifted quite a bit. He still has that exhausted, strained expression, but he no longer looked like he would strangle Zoro at any given moment. Still, the blonde was quiet, and he contemplated over whether or not to go ahead and explain to Zoro what was going on.
But Zoro wasn't afraid. He had a feeling Sanji wouldn't back away from tell him what was going on.
"…there…was an accident," Sanji said finally.
"Hmm?" Zoro asked. He stared carefully at Sanji, trying to get a better look at the blonde face. Aside from the half that was hidden behind blonde hair, the young man made it difficult to stare at him. Sanji kept his face away from Zoro's eyes, making it harder for him to figure if he was about to receive truth or lies.
"I had an accident…you saw," Sanji said, a finger pointing down to his bandaged feet. "And I need to hurry home," he then added.
"But how'd your feet get that way," Zoro continued to press on.
"Does that matter?" Sanji asked.
Zoro pointed at the blonde, arching forward a bit as he raised hi tone at Sanji.
"Yes, it does," he answered in a very rough tone, "I kind of need to know why you're so goddamn reluctant to go to a hospital…seeing that you are at serious risk of lowing your feet and all." He continued to stare hard at Sanji, watching as the blonde's expression become more and more worried by the second. "And why don't you have a phone on you? Or money? You expect me to believe that you decided to just take a stroll around in this winter? And when you arrived you didn't have your coat or shoes on…which means you took them off while you were outside at some point! Who the hell does that?"
Zoro took a deep breath after letting all his frustration out.
"…you can answer," he said finally, still trying to relax his breathing.
"You put a lot of thought into this," Sanji muttered in a hurt tone. His head was still lowered, and Zoro couldn't make out his hidden expression. "Didn't you?"
"I try to question the unusual," Zoro answered smartly. "And a guy with bloodied up feet, doing whatever he can to avoid help, isn't exactly normal."
"Right," Sanji said. "And going through someone's stuff is?"
Zoro didn't bother trying to defend himself. As far as he was concerned, he had every right to go through Sanji's belongings. He didn't know who the blonde was, didn't know why he was here, and not being told why gave him all the incentive he needed to check through.
"You're not going anywhere until you explain what's going on," Zoro said in a demanding tone. "And don't even bother trying to leave without your shoes…"
Sanji glared back.
"You'll attract attention from the cops just wandering around," Zoro said. He sat himself down on the couch, his eyes on the remote as he relaxed into the seat. "Of course, I'd call them myself…seeing that you're acting rather suspicious as it is." He rested his head on his arms as he congratulated himself on a job well done. He didn't have to look at Sanji to see that he was pissed and trapped in a corner. "So, either you stay and wait for Robin, who'll probably end up taking you to the hospital anyways, or you tell me what's going on, and I take you home or wherever you have to be-no questions asked from then on."
Zoro turned his head slightly and watched the blonde stare disdainfully at him.
He looked defeated.
Zoro looked over and stared at the blank television screen, pretending to not care that he was being a real asshole. He let his hand out and pointed over to the armchair, his eyes still locked on to the screen.
"Sit," Zoro said.
He heard Sanji slowly make a move, glimpsing, from the edge of his eyes, the blonde resting himself on the furniture. He could make out the sounds of the blonde's incoherent muttering, possible swears and comments about him and his attitude towards the situation.
Zoro continued to tell himself he didn't care. He probably wouldn't see Sanji again after today. Whatever impression he made wouldn't really affect him in the long run.
"So…" Zoro muttered.
"…yeah?"
"That accident," Zoro asked.
"What about it," Sanji asked defensively.
"Are you going to tell me what happened or not?" Zoro asked Sanji.
Sanji cupped his face as he lowered his head again.
"What happened," Zoro asked. He watched as Sanji's physical demeanor shrank, his body lurched over as he kept himself hidden from Zoro. It was just like before, when he had first set his eyes on the blonde.
"…I was drinking," Sanji said finally.
Zoro crept over a bit. He could hear Sanji just fine. However, he didn't believe it.
"Just drinking?"
Sanji tilted his hidden face, making a small portion of it now visible.
"You expect me to believe everything that happened was a product of you getting drunk," Zoro said in an offended tone. "That doesn't explain anything."
"I wasn't just drinking," Sanji said.
Zoro's eyebrow lifted a bit.
"What else were you doing," he asked curiously. "Does it have to do with you not wanting to go to the hospital?"
"Yes," Sanji answered quickly.
"So…were you high or something, "Zoro asked.
"I didn't have anything on me," Sanji said. He lifted his right foot up and stared at it for a few moments. Zoro watched as a smile appeared on his face. "And why else would I just take off my shoes?"
Zoro's eyes widened in disbelief.
"I was drinking, I decided to take a little something more, since I didn't have much else to do," Sanji added. "I'm sure I must have had some good reason to take them off, along with my coat…I don't remember them now, but I'm sure it made some sort of sense then."
"And Robin found you?"
Sanji nodded his head.
"She knew there was something wrong," Sanji said. "She must have been watching me." His smile softened a bit. "It's nice to know that she was worried."
"You know," Zoro said, "I'm pretty sure the doctors would have been soft on you, if it was your first time getting caught." He sank in his seat, wondering whether it would be appropriate or not to ask what Sanji had taken.
It did make some sense. Aside from the cold, Sanji's pale skin may have had to do with whatever he took. And Robin had asked to watch over him if he fell asleep. She didn't know how much he had taken, be it drugs or alcohol, and it would be safe to make sure nothing happened while he was out. And even Sanji noted himself that everything about his current state-not having anything on him except for his keys-was a bit odd.
That, and Zoro was still having problems getting over the kiss. The idea of Sanji being buzzed helped ease the horror of it.
"Taking illegal drugs will get you into trouble," Sanji said. "No matter if it's your first or second. They'll make you go to rehab, or call the police…"
"So that's why you asked to not be taken there," Zoro muttered. "Even though your feet are freezing?"
"I'll deal with it," Sanji answered halfheartedly.
"Not sure if that's worth it or not," Zoro replied. "But, I guess I'm not the one who has to live with it."
"I need to go," Sanji then said, ignoring the latter part of Zoro's comment.
"What?"
"Home," Sanji said. He stood up from the armchair and folded his arms. "I need t pick up my roommate. He has work after school -"
"School? You're in high school," Zoro asked.
"No," Sanji answered. "The guy I live with, he's a friend, and he still goes to high school. I drop him off and pick him up after he's done with work." Sanji's face weakened a bit. "He'd…be worried if I wasn't there…"
Zoro could see the anguish in the blonde's eye. He looked sad.
He looked really sad.
It was odd. Ok, there might have been guilt about what he had done, and the worry over his friend, but it seemed as though there were something more to it.
But Zoro could conclude that Sanji was serious about something; the blonde definitely wasn't faking this story. Or, at least, he wasn't lying about this part of the story.
"Ok," Zoro finally said.
Zoro got up from his seat and stretched himself out. He looked over to the kitchen, wondering whether he ought to give Sanji his shoes. They were still most likely wet, and the blood made them bad enough to where wearing them would definitely risk infection.
"What size shoe do you wear," he asked, still making his way to the kitchen. He walked over to the round kitchen table and grabbed hi neglected keys.
"You're taking me, right?" Sanji asked.
Wow. His tone was so much softer now.
Zoro resisted the urge to smile, merely nodded his head as he turned around and faced the blonde.
"Yeah," he said rather plainly.
For once, Zoro was glad that he had been given a GPS system for his birthday. At first he wanted to smash the thing into a billion little pieces, when he had unwrapped the present and stared at the picture on the box he almost went berserk. Yeah, he knew he wasn't the best when it came to directions, but he certainly wasn't the worst either, right?
That, and he knew Vivi had bought it with only the best intentions. He could never be mad at her, even if the gift was a mockery to his pride.
But today he was very grateful that he had the little device, so much that he didn't even have to force a smile on his face when he plugged it in to his car. And there were several reasons for this, since any other day, Zoro would have kept the thing hidden within the mess in his trunk.
One; Sanji lived a little more than an hour away, which meant it would be a long drive in this weather.
Two; it was snowing, and in the case that the traffic called for a change of route, he could rely on the device to pick the next quickest route.
Zoro looked over, giving a quick glance to the silent blonde that sat in the passenger seat. They had been on the road for less than twenty minutes, with Sanji pointing and remarking which way was quicker, when he suddenly went silent. Now, Zoro hadn't been relying on the GPS up until this moment. In fact, it had been in the trunk up until found himself forced to pull over and go through his trunk, pulling out the device and placing it within the confines of his car.
Which brought Zoro to three; Sanji had passed out due to exhaustion, making him unreliable.
Yeah, he had noticed that Sanji was going in and out of consciousness as he continued to drive on, and he had done nothing about it, seeing that Sanji appeared sober enough where sleeping wouldn't put him in any danger. Plus, the man looked tired as hell, and Zoro figured sleep would only help him.
So Vivi had done right…at least in this one and only situation. And Zoro would never tell her about it either, because he still didn't think it was that necessary. He knew his way home, even if it did take him three hours longer and a couple more galleons of gas.
Zoro sighed as he leaned in closer and squinted through the front window. The weather was getting pretty crappy. He couldn't see a damn thing in front of him, white snow aside. He had been driving on the surface streets the whole way, figuring it to be the safer option, and soon found that traffic was just as bad. He had no idea how close he was to the car in front of him, and he had no idea how close the car behind him was either. He could barely make out the red, green, and yellow behind the gray and white.
Zoro looked over to the clock and groaned.
Three thirty.
"Fuck it," he hissed through his teeth. Traffic wouldn't really settle now, being that everyone was going home, and it wasn't like Sanji had any right to complain.
Not that he could at the moment.
Zoro turned on his blinker and pulled himself out of the traffic. He'd park and wait it out a bit. Sanji had said his friend had a job after school. People get out school around three, so he had a few hours to kill before having to worry about it. He parked himself in front of a drug store, turned the heater on full blast, and took off his seat belt.
…
Zoro looked over and stared at the sleeping passenger next to him. Once again, Zoro couldn't help but notice how different Sanji's appearance was compared to what it had been when he had first seen him. Being asleep, the blonde appeared much softer, his face no longer showing off the tension it held while he was awake. It was nice.
So what had he seen, in the few hours he had known the guy? Sad, angry, pissed, desperate, frustrated, almost happy…
Maybe he was bi-polar.
Back to staring.
By now, Zoro had come to terms with the fact that Sanji had most likely lied to him about the reason why he had been taken to Robin's house. Zoro knew better. Although certain points did add up, the fact was was that Zoro had to help create the story. He had asked questions that tied into the reasons why Sanji avoided the hospital, or why he didn't have anything on him, or whether it was risking having his feet lose all sensation. Zoro was sure that, if he hadn't asked Sanji a damn thing, the blonde would have stuttered throughout telling the story.
But why did Sanji have to lie? Even Sanji must have understood that they would never see each other after today. Sanji could have said anything, and Zoro was quite sure it wouldn't have affected him. He knew Robin, and if Robin had considered the ultimatums and come to the decision that brining him to her home was an option, then Zoro figured the same. He'd hate to admit that she may be right, but…well, yeah, she was probably right. And if Sanji could tell her a few secrets, then why not him? Was it because Robin was a woman, and therefore better capable of compassionate understanding?
But these questions did no good for Zoro. In the end, he came full circle, then asking himself this question; why does it matter? He's not your friend, he's barely an acquaintance, so why bother trying to get into his head and figure out more about him?
Zoro gave another glance at the clock, surprised to see that twenty minutes had quickly gone by since asking himself all those pointless questions.
He gave another glance to Sanji.
He seemed at peace. Yes, he definitely looked a lot nicer when he was asleep. If it weren't for the fact that Sanji had left such a "wonderful" first impression, that being making out with Robin, Zoro say that Sanji almost looked cute. Almost.
Zoro grit his teeth at the god awful thought.
Zoro leered into the window and groaned. He pressed the lock on the key and went outside, braving the harsh cold winds as he made an attempt to take in a breath of fresh air. He stared into the car and closed it, making sure the door was still unlocked.
He'd go inside and get some food, or look around…or just not be near Sanji until the thought died out.
Then again, maybe he really did despise the blonde that much.
Zoro looked inside the car, making sure the sleeping figure was still asleep, and then proceeded to walk into the store.
He cared about his friends though, that much Zoro did know. That look of guilt Sanji had produced was real.
Why was he still thinking about this?
Zoro blushed and hurried over to the aisles.
And it wasn't like he wanted to be friends with Sanji either.
No, no he didn't.
He was in his room.
Sanji rubbed his eyes, his body sitting upon his messy, disheveled bed, having just woken up. He looked around the room once more. He recognized the posters, the clothes, the shelves full of familiar, personal items, as his own. This was definitely his room.
A dream?
Sanji lifted the blanket that had been covering his lower half, tossing it aside as he stood up, looking around the messy room. His bare feet could feel the carpet flooring, tingling a bit from the sudden sensation. But it didn't hurt. Sanji looked down, lifting a foot up and staring at the sole.
There were no freezer burns on his sole. He wiggled his toes, staring at the pink being produced by his muscles and blood.
Was it a dream, everything that he had happened?
Sanji sat himself on the bed, staring down at the floor. He could hear the sounds of the cars passing by from his window. He looked over and stared at the closed blinds, noticing that light cracked in between each and every one.
How long had he been asleep?
Sanji jumped from the bed and walked over to the window, his fingers going in between two blinds as he checked to see what was going on outside.
It could have been a dream. He could have fallen asleep right after the debating what he would do. Thoughts of suicide often lead to dreams about suicide, right? Did it work that way? Or was it all just one continuous dream?
He squinted his eyes as light beamed down on him, causing him to let the blinds go.
It had to be at least noon.
Sanji pulled away from the window, walking over to the drawer.
If it was just a dream after the other, then what did that mean? It certainly wasn't a horrible dream. It was emotional, it was emotionally painful, but it was physically painful. He didn't end up with broken bones, burning; fall apart, or, most importantly, dead.
He lived.
Sanji pulled out a plain shirt as he continued to try to remember everything.
The death…
He was going to kill himself. He was going to numb himself up, and have himself drown. He was going to sink and disappear and cause so much pain.
What about Usopp? You had mentioned it yourself to that one guy…Zoro?
Even Sanji had thought about it. He knew that killing himself was going to bring such misery to his friends, once they realized he was gone and never coming back.
But at the same time, there was that consoling feeling that he remembered, that sensation that killing himself was going to make thing better. He really had thought that. He remembered feeling so good about it too, once he came to that conclusion.
It was all so confusing, so complex and conflicting. All of those different thoughts and emotions, mixing around him…and then he was trying to keep silent about what he had tried to do.
Scared…that was another one. He was so afraid of being caught. He was so afraid of them knowing.
It was more than just guilt…he knew what he was doing was messed up from the beginning. That's why Robin had kept him in the house under Zoro's supervision.
She was so kind…she had to be a figment of his imagination.
And Zoro…he was fake too.
They both were.
Sanji frowned as he fished for a clean pair jeans. Really, this was the first time he had dreamt up new beings. Before, when he had regular dreams full of the usual strange and unexplainable, he would come up with characters, usually with no names or with generic personalities…but these two were different. The people in his current dreams were part of the scenery, never paying attention to him, even when the most horrible acts were committed. Robin and Zoro had names, had their personalities, performed actions, and interacted with him.
They…couldn't be simple constructions of his imagination. Right after dreaming up his friends, he goes and creates people? That didn't make any sense.
Sanji stopped what he was doing, dropping the clothes and standing up, his arms crossing and his expression darkening.
Fuck, he was dreaming.
And just as he thought this, the energetic sound of pop music filled the room. Sanji turned himself around, looking over to where the bed was, and where the source of music was coming from.
He walked over, getting down on his knees once he meet with the side of the bed. He didn't need to think twice about what he would discover as he stretched his arm out and began to feel around the bed. He let his hand trace the floor, and soon his fingers met with the smooth plastic covering. Sanji bit his lip as he felt his hand wrap around it and began pulling it closer to him. He moved a bit as he pulled his arm out, the music soon ending as his eyes met with his cell phone.
He had one missed call.
It was real. It was all real. Everything he had done. Everything he attempted to do. He had really almost jumped off a bridge. He had really almost killed himself.
"What kind of dream is this," Sanji asked, placing his free hand on his chest. He held in the urge to break into a sob, to fall apart. He knew better.
But this wasn't the usually pattern.
Sanji looked around his room, expecting something to happen. He knew he was dreaming now, which meant the dream had to end soon. He was still completely intact. Sanji knew it wouldn't end like this; he never let himself end like this.
"A nightmare," he yelled. He forced himself up and stared angrily at the ceiling. "Or am I just gonna die? Make up my fucking mind already!" He stomped on the floor, his teeth clenched together as he griped tightly to his phone.
"Or does it not matter anymore," he asked himself. "I'm dying inside…right now. And I'm pretty sure, once I wake up; I'm going to finish what I started." He looked down at his hands. "No point in telling myself what to do anymore." His voice was dark, too full of anger and spite to be full of sobs and pain.
Sanji threw the phone against the wall, watching the bright screen snap and go dark.
"It's not fair…"
Sanji's eyes widened in surprise. He turned himself around, hearing the sounds of whispers and weak cries, and stared shockingly at the figures that had appeared out of nowhere, standing before him in his room.
"Luffy…" Sanji watched as he stared at the tall, slim figure standing in the middle of the room. The boy was dressed rather plainly, his face up as he stared out into space, while his arms held on to the frail figure that was crying into his chest. Her long hair was a bit messy as she clung on to her friend with one hand, the other covering her chest, sobbing uncontrollably into his chest, while her boyfriend leaned against the wall, his face stained with tears as he tried to keep himself from falling.
"Usopp…Kaya," Sanji muttered.
"What did I do," Kaya wept, her face hidden from Sanji's. "Why couldn't he tell me anything? Was it something I said to him? I thought we were ok…" Kaya hiccupped into Luffy's chest, burying her face even deeper. "I would've listened to him."
"Kaya," Sanji said, in a slightly louder tone. He reached out for her, forgetting for those few seconds that this was all a dream. She looked so real. He wanted to console her. He couldn't stand seeing her cry, especially with him being the cause.
"H-he…he just can't be gone!" Sanji heard Usopp say from the side. He closed his eyes, trying his best to funnel out the sounds of Usopp's loud sobs. "Sanji…Sanji…you can't be gone!" Sanji held on to himself as he heard the body fall to the ground with a thud, followed by the sound of fists hitting the ground.
"It's not fair," Usopp cried. Sanji kept his eyes closed tight. "Why would he…it's…it's not fair!"
Sanji held his breath as he began to leave his room. He still kept his eyes closed, knowing his way out of his room.
"Sanji…"
He let his hand out as he felt for the door knob.
"Sanji…why?"
Shut up. Just shut up. You're not real.
"Sanji!"
Sanji opened the door, making a mad dash out of his room. He felt his eyes burn, his chest fill up with weight, causing him to stop at the very end of the hall and lean pathetically against the wall. He took a small breath, keeping himself from crying.
This wasn't real. You don't know what would have happened.
Sanji let a hand cover his face as he tried to calm himself down. He knew the dream couldn't last much longer. He knew it wasn't real now…he'd end it sooner or later.
"…I'm so sorry…"
Sanji lifted his head, hearing a familiar soft tone in front of him. He opened his eyes, staring at the two new figures in front of him. Two women…both dressed in dark clothing.
Sanji grimaced as his eyes laid on the first.
Nami.
"I…I can't imagine how you must be feeling," Nami said, her hand caressing the shoulder of the other. "Losing your brother…it must be really hard." She bit her upper lip as she let a few tears run down her face. "I'm really s-sorry for your loss."
Sanji turned over and stated at the older blonde, her face covered with one of her hands, the other holding her stained glasses. He could make out a bit of her face. He wished he couldn't.
What makes you think Kalifa would fly all the way here? She can't stand you!
"Kalifa," Sanji said weakly.
Don't cry.
Please don't cry.
"Nami…"
Please, no more…
Why couldn't he ever get the peace that he wanted? Why did he always have to suffer?
Why is it that, even when he isn't dying, he has to watch his own friends die a little in front of him?
Why can't he just get what he wanted, for once?
"Just fucking end," Sanji cried. "I don't care! I don't care about how they feel, or what they'll do! I don't! I don't! Just end already. End! End! End-"
Wake up.
"…wake up…"
"Wake up!"
Sanji's eyes burst open. He frantically looked up; staring at Zoro's panicked expression. Sanji breathed hard, his chest heaving up and down, his body shaking and soaked in sweat. Everything looked blurry, and everything literally felt like shit. It really did. Sanji felt his stomach violently twist in him, causing his mouth to dry up and go sour on him. Without much thought, he pushed Zoro away from him, his hand grabbing at the door handle as he felt his stomach lurch and perform flips. Luckily the car was parked, and the door was open, giving Sanji the capability of" letting it all out".
His hand clung on to the edge of the car seat as he kept his head lowered. He huffed a bit, spitting out the remains of his "duty" in a poor attempt to rid of the taste. Unfortunately for him, the one expulsion was not enough. His eyes widened for a moment as he felt more rise up, and he closed his eyes tight as he continued to relieve himself on the pavement. A hand rested on him, lightly rubbing his back. No, awkwardly was better fitted for it. He was sure Zoro was panicking right now.
He did feel better after this one. He was sure nothing would follow now, seeing that everything was literally now on the cement pavement. Sanji blinked a few times, his eyes watery from the experience, and slowly lifted his head. Everything still spun around in circles, and now it smelled like bile.
"Are you ok! ?"
Sanji looked over and stared blankly at Zoro.
"Holy shit…" Zoro shook his head in disbelief. "You look like crap…"
Sanji closed his eyes.
Everything was real. You really did attempt a suicide today. You really did make out with the woman who stopped you from doing so. You really might lose your feet. And you really did throw up all over the sidewalk…and a bit of the bottom flooring of this guy's car. Cheers Monday, cheers.
Sanji would have laughed at the very end of the thought were it not for the fact that he felt like he had been hit by a car.
He sank into the car seat, his hand covering his mouth as he stared into the darkness.
"What time is it," Sanji muttered through his hand.
"Six," Zoro answered.
"Six?" Sanji looked at Zoro with an estranged expression. "Why six?"
"Bad traffic," Zoro responded. "I had to pull out and wait till about four-something, and then I made my way to hear…even then, everything was so jammed up." Zoro leaned to the side to get a glimpse pf the mess Sanji had made. "…bad weather…are you going to be ok?"
Sanji weakly gave a nod as he continued to stare out.
"Where are we?"
"Hopefully, across the street from your place," Zoro answered. "You live in an apartment complex, right?"
Sanji nodded his head.
"Good, then we're here," Zoro said, opening the door and getting out from the car.
Sanji sat in the car seat, still in a semi daze. He closed his mouth, despite the taste, and looked around the car, out the windows, all over. His body was still shaky. He couldn't feel a damn thing right now. He heard the sound of Zoro's footsteps to his side and looked up to see the man offering a hand.
"Come on," Zoro said in an annoyed tone.
Sanji leered down at the sidewalk. He looked back up, a hand unbuckling the seat belt, his other hand outstretched to Zoro's, and grabbing hold of it. He felt himself being pulled up, and Sanji let one of his long legs reach out as far as possible as to avoid the mess. Zoro pulled him in closer, and Sanji soon found himself, though just barely, standing up. He breathed hard-his other hand still covering his mouth-and inhaled the ice cold air. He could see a few mounds of snow surrounding the area; the whole rooftop of his apartment was covered in snow. There were no more harsh winds. Everything was rather peaceful.
Sanji glanced at his side, nearly jumping back a bit when he realized how close Zoro and him were. He wasn't in the mood for surprises. Not now. Not anymore. He took a few steps toward the complex, stopping as his feet meet with the dark, wet asphalt.
"Thanks," Sanji finally said as he looked up at the huge building.
His eyes landed on the second floor, seeing the dark windows that told him he was still safe. Kaya's parents would most likely drive him home in this weather. He knew he didn't have much to himself now.
"Do you need help getting over there," he heard Zoro ask.
Sanji shook his head.
"I can get there myself," Sanji replied. "You want me to return your shoes, right?"
There was a modest pause before Zoro finally answered, "I really don't care…you can keep them. It's not like you'll be getting your old shoes back."
"Right," Sanji said with a weak chuckle.
He looked over and stared at Zoro, trying to make out the other's expression in the dark.
Zoro looked so worried. It was strange. He was sure Zoro hated him. He was sure the guy couldn't stand him. He had made him wriggle underneath him when he forced him to confess what had happened, and although Sanji had lied though his teeth, had thought bitter thoughts about him, he felt a bit guilty. Sanji really hoped Zoro was only upset because of the whole vomiting thing. He didn't want to think that Zoro might have actually cared.
And then there was Robin too.
Robin had tried to save his life. Even though it made no real difference, her act made him feel really happy. She didn't know him, and she had no real obligation to help him out and risk getting herself late to work, just as Zoro had no real obligation to miss his classes just to watch over him. Why did she have to care so much? Why did she have to be so kind? Why did they have to care at all about him, even if it was only a little?
"Sanji?"
"Yeah, Zoro?" Sanji asked.
Zoro sighed, his face heavy with doubt.
"Take care of yourself, ok?" Zoro said to the blonde. He closed the door and walked over to the driver's side, his eyes still leering at Sanji. "Don't…just be careful."
Sanji didn't reply, only staring as the young man got into the car, closed the door, and turned the engine back on. He made sure to not move, not until he saw Zoro change gears and begin to drive off. Only then did Sanji begin to cross the empty street and make his way to the huge building. By the time he was on the other side of the street Zoro had driven off, making a turn and disappearing from sight. Sanji stopped where he was then, his head lowered and staring down.
He wiggled his toes.
Nothing.
He stomped down on the floor with his right foot.
Nothing.
The left.
Nothing.
He scrunched his feet together, tightening the muscles for a few seconds before giving up and releasing them.
Nothing, he had absolutely no sensation. He could still move his toes, and work his feet, but his nerves were damaged.
And Sanji felt nothing. He knew he was supposed to be upset. But he couldn't.
He just…couldn't.
For all he knew, this could be a dream as well.
Zoro decided to drive straight to the dorms, rather than risk meeting up with Robin. He knew she would be upset. She had asked him to watch over Sanji and make sure he was properly healing, and instead he drove the guy home.
He would have to avoid the west campus with all his might for the next month or so.
In the end, Zoro had no real idea what he had just done. And perhaps that was for the best. Sanji didn't want help, nor did he ask for it. Sanji didn't want to talk about where he came from, and he didn't want to create bonds by talking about it either.
The man was an anomaly. Simple as that and very complicated. Zoro couldn't expect anything from the man, and now he would never have to. He was gone from his life, and Zoro could continue on without ever thinking about him again.
That being said, Zoro was already making plans for what he would have to do once he got back in his room. He had missed all his Monday classes, all three in total, and one of them being the class he was very close to having to repeat. He would have to study his ass off tomorrow. Thank goodness he only had Japanese to worry about, and that was early in the morning. He'd hurry and do his work, and then read through everything in hopes of catching up.
If he crammed for the next week, hopefully he'd get a decent enough grade on his next test.
Zoro smiled, finding his rather poorly constructed plan a shoo-in for at least a "C" in Chemistry. He continued to drive on, making the ever occasional glances as he tried to maneuver his way through the dark streets.
Winter, how it made things to difficult for him. Zoro looked over to his side mirror to check to see if there was anything behind him, hoping he could slow his speed down a bit considering he could barely see a thing in front of him.
And then he noticed the small, folded paper on the edge of the seat.
Zoro stared down, which probably wasn't the safest thing to do while driving, and stared at the small folded paper. He hadn't really noticed it before, not all this time.
Right from the bat though, Zoro knew it wasn't his. He would never use a thick sharpie marker to write down notes.
The paper was just…stained. Most of the black ink had soaked thought the folded sheets, and the wet weather caused it to smudge a bit from the looks of it. Of course Zoro didn't care. All he cared about was the fact that he had gone through Sanji's coat and had only come across the man's keys.
And now he had a little note.
Even though the chances of it explaining to Zoro were horrendously thing, he wanted to know what the note contained. He figured anything would satisfy.
Keeping his eyes on the road, Zoro leaned over and made a quick grab for the note. It took a few attempts, but he had it in his grasp.
Zoro kept on driving, once in a while making a glance as he tried to unfold the paper with his right hand. He managed to bring it to where it was only folded in half, but was having a rather difficult time getting it open all the way.
He ended up parking.
Zoro unfolded it, staring at the messy, smudged writing on the sheet of paper. From what he cold see, there were a few readable lines; everything else was beyond the point of literacy. He let the paper closer to his face, squinting as he tried to make out each sentence.
…
H…a…te…m…e…if…y…o…u…w…ill…
"Hate me if you will," Zoro muttered. He reread the few words over and over again, a daunting feeling creeping over him as he realized those were the words that had been written down. He tried to make out the words following it, but found it too difficult to do. He groaned and skidded through the letter, hoping to find another par that he could make out.
Y…o…u…don't….h…a…v…e…t…o…f…o…r…give….
What exactly was being written down?
Zoro had a feeling, but he refused to believe it.
I know this makes little sense. I've never mentioned ever having a problem, never in front of you.
Shit! Why didn't he listen to Robin? Why'd he have to go and drive Sanji back?
Hate me if you will, as you have more than any right to.
And he left Sanji alone! Dear God, he left the guy alone!
You don't have to forgive me, and I understand if you never do.
He left him alone to die!
Just promise me…
"Damn it!" Zoro hit the steering wheel, his body arching as he tossed the note away from him with his right hand. He didn't want to look at it.
…
Zoro lifted his head as he heard his phone call out to him. He felt guilt build up in his chest as he recognized the soft tone. Robin was calling him. Of course she was. Zoro hesitantly grabbed his phone from the drink holder and stared at the screen. He didn't know what he was supposed to say. What could he say? That he was being an idiot and decided to take Sanji home because he felt bad for him? That he didn't know that watching over him could be the difference between life and death? How was he supposed t know that? She never told him!
He felt awful. No, that wasn't even a faction of how bad Zoro felt.
He couldn't go back…chances were Sanji was long gone. Even if he was still alive, he doubted he would find the blonde sitting in his apartment…he didn't even know which one Sanji lived in!
Nevertheless, Zoro pressed the call button and placed the phone up to his ears.
"Robin," he murmured weakly.
So yeah. I've received word that some of you think the interactions between Sanji and Zoro are a bit slow. Yes, they are. I take my time when creating a relationship, especially in the case of one where the two would not get along. So yeah, this first part of the story basically relies on them creating some sort of relationship, be it good or bad, just as long as they know each other and can establish something from there on end. The second part of this story will go about at building the relationship, as well as character development and plot development-much like a real story, if you will. So, consider this a small bump, and that you've just about finished climbing it.
Compliments and criticism wanted.