Into Thin Air: Chapter 4
Marianne sat in the library, not knowing just how to keep herself calm. She had gone through this before, not knowing where Christopher was and whether he was all right or not. That time, however, he had been away with the forces ad there were so many other reasons why she had not heard from him. That time, he was far away and correspondence between distant countries was hardly reliable. Also she knew he was possibly in battle and there were many reasons why she wouldn't hear from him. That time she had just tried to keep all the possible reasons in mind to keep her hopes up: it was just as possible for him to be fine as it was to something bad to have happened. That had been hope enough.
This time was worse: he had disappeared on a half-hour ride on a familiar road. Even if he'd somehow come off his horse he would be home on foot by now if he was in reasonable health. As the hours passed Marianne's panic started to take over. She could no longer hold her tears back when one after another someone from the search party came back to the house to report that nothing had been found and it was hard to even try and find any tracks because of the dark. At midnight they had to call a halt to the search: they simply could not see what they were doing. Even moonlight would have helped but the cloud was low.
At this point Mrs Dobson was by Marianne's side and did not leave. She said nothing when she saw the tears emerge but wrapped her arms around the young mistress and held her close. Atfirst light she would send for Mrs Ferrars and perhaps even Mrs Dashwood, but meanwhile Mrs Brandon really was quite alone. She saw the fear in the younger woman's eyes and remembered the time when the whole household had been on tenterhooks, not being sure if their master would come back from battle. If their worry then was at all an indicator of how their master's wife would be feeling now, the young woman would need all the support she could get.
"You should try and rest a little, Madam," Mrs Dobson suggested quietly. She knew it was pointless to try and convince Marianne to actually go to bed, but she shouldn't just sit in the library all night either.
"I can't. I can't possibly until he comes back…" Marianne answered quietly. She was managing to keep her tears from turning into full sobs, but the fear she was experiencing was constricting her chest so hard she could hardly breathe.
"I know, I know, dear, but perhaps if I bring you a blanket on the daybed there?" Mrs Dobson tried. After a short think Marianne nodded. She wouldn't sleep, but she was feeling a little cold.
"Please, Mrs Dobson, you must retire for the night. You mustn't stay up." Marianne then said. It was one thing for her to wait up, but the staff had worked so hard today and the house needed running the day after as well. She was of no consequence, really, but the staff needed their rest.
"Nonsense, Madam. We've sent the younger staff to their beds for the night but Michaels and I will just be downstairs in our offices in case Colonel Brandon does come. We cannot go to bed no more than you can, Madam. Now, lie back at least and rest what you can so you'll be all right for when he does come home." Mrs Dobson spoke in a very reassuring voice, almost like tucking a child into bed after a nightmare. She pulled the blanket over Marianne's shoulder as the younger woman reclined onto the daybed.
"Yes, he will come home. My Christopher will make sure he'll come home." Marianne replied, gathering some of her resolve. It would not do to lose faith now. Mrs Dobson left her in the library, hoping the young lady would nod off even just a little. It would be a long night otherwise, waiting for sunrise and the search to start again. Mrs Dobson's own fears had been tucked away underneath her professional façade, but every step that took her deeper downstairs to her office made those fears rise closer to the surface. She cared for her master very deeply. He was a good man and Mrs Dobson had seen how lonely and miserable he had been over the years and how happy he was now. It would be so cruel if that happiness was to come to an end so soon.