Dear Sasuke,
Sorry about the pee but I really couldn't hold any more at the time. I mean, way was I supposed to do, pee in my jumpsuit?
Sakura's been training real hard since you left also, Pervy Sage and I don't get in to Konoha as often as I'd like to anymore, and whenever we do Sakura's usually too tuckered out to hang out. I'm pretty sure she still misses you. I even asked Pervy Sage about it and he just said something really cryptic like "Absence makes the heart grow longer" or something. How can the heart get longer, does it stretch like my toad's tongues do? That'd be weird.
I wasn't able to ask Tsunade or Kakshi about Anko lately since we've been out for so long, but I sent Tsunade a letter asking about it. She said that when I get back she's going to punch me so hard me jaw bone could replace gaara's sand. Thanks a lot Sasuke, now I'm even more scared to return to Konoha.
We've been hanging out at a lot of colorful neighborhoods since we left Konoha. Pervy Sage keeps wanting to go to these areas were a lot of women walk around in bunny outfits. One time he said we were running low on funds and he needed me to use my Sexy Jutsu to pretend to be one of the ladies there to make some money, but I knew he had a lot more money. I saw his check book. I don't know why he thought I'd make some money doing that though. Would you pay to see me in a Bunny outfit?
Well, this snake is pretty cool, but I'm kind of grossed out by how he keeps slithering around my legs.
Anyway, Pervy Sage wants to teach me a new jutsu so I'm going to have to go, cya.
Yours Truly,
Naruto Uzumaki