Philophobia

A/N: Philophobia is the fear of falling in love. I'm doing alternate themes in a kind of random order for Yullen week as I get inspired for different themes at weird times. Allen and Lavi friendship so don't get worried it's clearly Yullen, Allen and Kanda are soul-mates we know this by now It's hard to believe we're already on day four guys! And Christmas Yullen special on the 24-25th so stay tuned. Yes I'm writing for Christmas eve.

Xoxoxoxoxox

White hair, came in a flurry, as a young British boy raced across the hall. He began to knock upon another door, quite a distance from his own room. The knocking began to quicken. "Alright, alright.." a male voice spoke out as footsteps were heard approaching the door.

A red haired man, rather disheveled, lines under his eyelids looked outside the door. "Oh it's you Moyashi-chan." The male's eyes lit up in a hurry as he smiled at his friend, slinging an arm around Allen's shoulder, and pulling him into the room.

The white haired boy blinked, before speaking his friends name. "Lavi…"

"Come in, come in…" Lavi said, in such a carefree tone, as if Allen was going to have a choice. Lavi's eyes trailed right and left over the halls of the order. "So what can I do ya for-ah you're flushed...did you breathe at all before coming over here?" the red haired boy got worried, a hand tracing the young teenagers forehead.

Allen breathed heavily, eyes reddened, and panting as he held his hands to his knees. "Lavi I…"

"Hm what is it Moyashi-chan get in another fight with Kand-" he began, preparing to tease at the boy's obvious weakness, only hearing light sniffling. He poked him against the cheek, as Allen's eyes remained down. Lost in an eternal abyss of thoughts…one Lavi hoped could end. The boy thought too much for his good, it was hard to really believe he was only a teenager at times, with all he took on upon himself.

"Allen-cha-" Lavi stumbled over his words as he felt two slender arms enveloping around his waist. Allen breathed into the fabric of his friends shirt.

" . . " Allen spoke, his words scrambled and rushed, and his cheeks were still flushed.

"W-what? What are you talking about aren't you-" Lavi started.

"Don't say that. I just want you to kiss me…please, "Allen said, face leaning closer to Lavi feeling his breath upon the red head. The older male gave him a light smile, pressing his hand over the boy's lips. Allen opened his eyes blinking in confusion. Lavi took a step aside, sighing slightly.

"Allen…take a seat...okay?" Lavi advised leaving the boy to sit on the mattress as Lavi pulled out a chair from his desk, draped with a mountain of paperwork. Lavi placed the pile unto his desk, lifting the chair across from his bed to look at Allen. He decided on sitting backwards on the chair, legs straddling the side, as he crossed his arms, crossing his arms over the head of the hair, as he rested his head against his arms. "Allen.." Lavi sighed.

The older male shifted his gaze upon the boy who seemed to find the floor to be of some interest. And listening seemed to be the last thing on Allen's mind. "Why are you asking me that? I mean I feel it's pretty clear who you really wan-"

"Stop it!" Allen shouted, feeling a bit embarrassed at his outburst, he had all but bolted out from his seat, looking across at Lavi. "S-sorry", he turned his face away, eyes hiding a bit of shame. "For…everything." Allen said, eyes moving towards the door, as he bowed before the red haired man.

Lavi caught him by the wrist, holding onto the boy. "Wait. Wait. Wait Moyashi-chaaaan~ You can't honestly think I'm gonna let you go without an explanation, What the hell happened? Why did you ask me that?" Lavi held tight onto the boy's arm urging him to face him.

Allen averted his gaze biting hard on his tongue. "I just… thought that it'd be easier.."

"Easier?" Lavi pointed his statement back at the boy, his eyes quizzical. "Should I be taking that as an insult, Moyashi…" The red haired man took the edge of the boy's cheeks on both sides, and flicked him in the center of the forehead.

"No…no that's not what I meant..", Allen explained, breathing out deeply, eyes closing. "I mean to say…I thought it would make my situation easier…I feel comfortable with you…and if I could kiss you, it may clarify things.."

"Clarify things," Lavi asked baffled, a hand held to his forehead. "You're not making any sense Mo-ya-shi-chaaan, This has to do with Yuu doesn't it?"

Allen averted the older male's gaze, it was confirmed.

"Explain"

"It's nothing"

"Allen"

"Yes.."

"Just tell me already before I ask Kanda directly.."

"You wouldn't"

Lavi grinned, "Try me"

Allen sighed, hoping to calm himself down, hearing Lavi's request. He lowered his shoulder blades and sat back on the bed. This time Lavi sat right beside him. "I…kissed Kanda."

"What?"

"Yeah I just…we we're arguing about him being just such a jerk again, running off with Tieldoll to the Asia district without letting anyone know and…I, heat of the moment."

"Allen," Lavi's eyes were rather amused. " You're worrying to much. I'm surprised this is your first kiss. The way Yuu looked at you, Allen the other day…I swore you to had done…much dirtier things before..."

Allen blushed, eyes ablaze in a mix of emotions, as he reached for one of the pillows next to him, throwing it directly into Lavi's face. "Of course not! I mean I can't imagine Kanda wanting to…not that I want him-ah dammit he hates me okay?" he screamed out his worry head fallen, as he slowly began to curl his body into a ball, legs up against his chest.

"So by making things easier…you meant?" Lavi shushed Allen, rubbing circles against his back as if he were a child.

"I just felt…maybe if I kissed another guy like I did with Kanda, I'd be able to just forget it…forget what I did, and feel as though he's not the only one I possibly would ever want to-" Allen groaned, preparing to throw another punch in Lavi's direction by the gleam of pure bliss on the red-head's face. "What?" Allen demanded.

Lavi chuckled, patting the boy against the shoulder, "I didn't think I'd see the day…"

"What are you thinking?"

"That someone would fall-"

"Stop!"

"In love with Kanda Yuu, the way you did." Lavi finished, a satisfied grin on his face, as Allen settled to punch him against the shoulder.

"I'm an idiot.." Allen noted, burying his face against his knees. "A hopeless idiot." Lavi gave a sympathetic smile.

"Not all hope is gone, Moyashi-chan~"Lavi spoke in a cheerful tone again, grabbing the boy by the hand and leading him down the hall."

Xoxoxoxoxo

Kanda eye's opened again realizing the girl was not going to leave. Lenalee with her traditional twin-tails grown out, sat right next to the formerly meditating man. She had been prying at him all morning.

"You need to talk to him." Lenalee explained, "You know that right?" And it was hardly a question ,but a statement based on true concern.

"Che," Kanda scoffed again, his scowl not quite as fierce around the girl he could refer to as his sister. The girl had her moments but overall really seemed to respect his privacy, and she saw him as family so it only felt right to do the same.

"I'm not exactly the one who ran off now am I?" Kanda noted, having explain the little incident before. Arguing back and forth, as per usual, until Yuu Kanda had to be brilliant and say that. He just had to ask him, "Why did he concern himself with me?"

Lenalee smiled over at him, "I think you know the answer to that."

"Hmph," Kanda rolled his eyes, "Shouldn't you be chasing after the boy yourself?"

Lenalee looked at him eyes opening and then fell into a fit of laughter. "Aha, haha, Kanda-kun..I-look I admit Allen is very attractive and he's so precious to me. But I just haven't thought of him as anything more than a friend, Not since-"

"The damn rabbit" Kanda interrupted, "What made you decide on him anyway?"

Lenalee blinked at the question, biting her lip before truly forming an appropriate response. "I didn't exactly decide at any moment…It's more something I felt." She explained eyes off in a bit of gaze before turning to the sourly expressed man. "I don't think you or Allen really have had a choice in your own feelings. About anything…"

"Ah.." Kanda sighed, "I guess there's nothing I can do to stop you two then?" he spoke, letting his 'sister' go. Lavi was an idiot but he wasn't a heartless one. He could trust Lavi with her, assuming he kept him on some sort of watch.

"Nope," Lenalee grinned, "I think things will go well for you and Allen-kun as well, you just need to be more honest with each other.

Kanda growled, "Are you done now..?" he rolled his eyes, seeing his sister smile earnestly.

"Ah-ahhh…what-what the hell Lavi?" a young male's shriek came into the training room. A form of white fluffy hair dashed through the room as Allen nearly tripped over himself, having a 'push' from Lavi.

"Moyashi," Kanda spoke in a rather deadly tone. His Mugen sword was not exactly far from his reach either.

"I-just.."Allen couldn't look at the older male now, his cheeks flushed, while Kanda appeared to remain as calm as ever.

Lenalee took a clue from Lavi, who was currently the next to face the wrath of Yuu Kanda. She pulled onto Lavi's wrist tightly dragging him away and closing the door to the training room. Allen noticed a bit of a gleam in both of their eyes, seeming rather satisfied.

Allen however was now alone. With Kanda, he could hardly say he felt safe anymore.

He wanted to do the same act as before and leave out of the room.

"Don't pull another stunt again, Moyashi?"

"Ah, Kanda look it just happened and umph-" Allen started. In the blink of an eye he felt himself being backed up into the walls of the training room. Kanda roughly placed a hand under the boy' chin forcing him to look at him. His eyes seemed rather…concerned if not for a moment.

"I'm not going to run away from this Allen, I expect you to do the same…" Kanda began eyes looking into the boy, his lips clashed against Allen's. The white haired boy felt himself in a rather uncomfortable position. Kanda had, all of his body, pressed between himself and the wall. The worst part being Allen hadn't even wanted to escape. That was the part that scared him the most. Kanda closed his eyes, seeming rather focused on his task.

Kanda broke for air, before tilting his head to capture the boy's lips in a more vulnerable position. "Kan…umgh…ah.." Allen groaned into Kanda's mouth, feeling the older man smirk against him. Kanda's tongue pressed out of his mouth, caressing the boy's lips as his hands locked over the boy's wrist holding him in place, and close against Kanda's own body.

Kanda tongue entered into Allen's mouth, meeting Allen's own, as they began to move together. The deepened kiss lasted for a few seconds before they both were choking on air. "So don't you run off like like. Stupid Moyashi." Kanda said preparing to leave the boy there, feeling the warmth against his lips.

"K-kanda Wait!" Allen stammered out, feeling the older male's gaze on him made him terrified. He turned to wrapping his arms tightly around Kanda's neck and reaching on his tiptoes to kiss Kanda straight on the mouth.

This time Allen's eyes were closed and Kanda seemed to be remotely surprised at his actions. For now the words were terrifying to say.

Allen had kissed Kanda once again, the touch of their lips rather innocent, but Kanda could see the boy attempting to put his all into it.

I love you. Allen would have said, copying the older man's action, kissing him deeply.

I love you. Kanda's hand trailed across the back of Allen's white shirt, feeling the skin underneath.

I love you. Allen was nearly screaming as he felt a shiver down his body.

I love you…Allen wanted to moan out feeling their positions change back to their first kiss with Kanda pressing Allen to a flat surface of the wall. This time he moved to press his knee in between the gap of Allen's legs, massing Allen's hips with his hand, his other now laying on Allen's cheek, feeling at last the boy wouldn't try to escape from him. They continued their kiss

I love you. They were both going crazy, Allen losing himself to Kanda's touch.

I love you, but for now the thought of the words we're more terrifying than life itself.