Chapter 4
The ship was enormous, easily four times bigger than any ship Hawke had ever seen in Kirkwall. Instead of being made out of wood, it seemed to be made out of pure steel, and was shaped like the head of a trident. People dressed in the same strange clothing as Shepard and her crew climbed all over the ship, carrying pieces of metal to and fro. Occasional geysers of sparks burst from the ship, making it look like mages were crafting an enormous magical weapon.
"This is the Normandy," Shepard said.
"Maker," Isabella gasped. "This thing could never possibly float. What kind of ship is this?"
"It's, uh, a starship," Shepard replied.
"A 'starship?' You sail among the stars?" Merrill asked. "You really do come from the sky."
"Close enough to it," the busty woman with black hair said. "You can set up camp wherever you'd like, although I'd imagine you'd like to stay away from the ship."
"Are you kidding me? I want to see what it's like inside!" Isabella said.
"Commander?" The woman asked.
"You really want to see what it's like inside?" Shepard asked.
"Do I ever!" Isabella said.
"Well...I guess you can. But not today. Don't want our new friends getting culture shock."
"What do you mean, 'culture shock?' I'm not going to keel over and die if I set foot in your ship, will I?"
"No, nothing like that. Culture shock is a term we have to describe the feeling of being introduced to a new culture," Shepard explained. "Once you get used to everything we have here, I'll let you on."
"I'll be sure to get better soon," Isabella swore.
"Attention crew," Shepard called to the working men and women. "This is Hawke and his group of friends. They are our friendly locals, so be nice to them! They'll be staying with us for however long we're grounded. If they ask for anything, help them get it."
"Thank you for the help, but we should only be needing food," Hawke said.
"That's one thing we have a fair supply of," Shepard said. "Not sure you'll like it, though. It's kind of made for our taste."
"So we get to experiment with food," Hawke said. "I could think of a worse."
"Good to see you're taking everything in stride."
"When trouble follows you like a faithful dog, you learn to go with the flow."
"Story of my life," Shepard said.
"Then that's one thing we have in common," Hawke said. "I think this is the start of a beautiful friendship."
"I sure hope so. Right now you're our only friends out here," Shepard said. "I got to make sure our repairs are going smoothly. If you need anything, just shout for us."
"Thinking of how to tell this story, Varric?" Merrill asked as she stirred the pot of soup.
"People from the sky, ships that sail the stars, and non-demonic abomination-like things that are actually our friends? Daisy, if I start telling this story, they'll throw me in the nuthouse!" Varric said.
"At least this Shepard keeps some good looking men around," Isabella said.
"Maker, can you stop thinking with your legs for one day of your Blighted life?" Aveline demanded.
"And the prig starts her bitching!"
"Ladies! Please! Calm down!" Hawke said. "What has gotten into you two? Just when you started getting along so well."
"By 'getting along,' do you mean not pulling each other's hair?" Anders asked.
Aveline shot Anders a withering look.
"I'm sorry, it's just...I'm worried," she said. "About Donnic."
"I'm sorry we couldn't leave without getting him first," Hawke said.
"No, I'm not blaming you; killing Knight-Commander Meredith, almost being killed by those Templars on the spot, we had to get out of Kirkwall fast. Donnic can take care of himself, and more importantly, the city guard and citizens. I'm just worried that the Templars in Kirkwall might try to torture him to find out where we are."
"We'll find a way to get him. Somehow," Hawke promised.
"Thank you, Hawke. And Isabella? I...didn't mean to yell at you," Aveline said.
"Did you just apologize?" Isabella asked.
"Yes, I did. Are you going to rub that in as well?"
"No, I just never thought I'd see the day when you'd apologize for calling me a whore, that's all," Isabella mused. "Actually, I don't blame you. I'm worried about what's going to happen to my ship as well."
"The one you stole from Castillon?" Merrill asked.
"Yep, the very same one," Isabella said. "All I wanted to do was sail it around, showing it off as the ship I rightfully stole; just rubbing it in his face. Apparently it was too much to ask for."
"And find a crew of good looking men?" Bethany asked.
"Well, well! Look who's man hungry now! The long years in the Circle Tower getting to you?"
"Gotten to me, you mean," Bethany said, blushing slightly. "This has to be the first time I've spent the night outdoors since I was taken in."
"All the better the Chantry and the Circle are gone," Anders said.
"That reminds me," Hawke said, getting up.
"Reminds you of what?"
Winding up, Hawke punched Anders squarely in the nose. The mage fell off the log he was using as a bench, a tangle of limbs.
"That's for blowing up the Chantry, bringing the entire city down on our heads, and risking my sister's life!"
"Hawke!" Merrill gasped.
"No, it was fair," Anders said, trying to get to his feet. His nose was gushing blood. "I know I deserve worse than that."
"Spoken like a truly beaten wife," Isabella spat bitterly.
"I am responsible for countless mages' deaths; I deserve worse than this," Anders said.
"I'm not a fan of hearing Blondie saying he's 'not worth' anything. Too risqué for me. Anyone want to see if they have any space ale on their ship?" Varric said.
"That sounds like a good idea," Isabella asked. "Who should we ask?"
"I'm going to ask that rough man over there, see if he has some good stories to go with those scars," Varric said, pointing to the scarred man. He was walking around the ship, carrying his strange weapon.
"Be my guest. I don't want to be killed asking for a drink," Isabella said.
"I want to ask that strange woman where she's from," Merrill said, pointing to the alien called Tali. She stood by the machine that made 'holograms.' "The designs on her suit look Dalish."
"Well, if Kitten here is going to talk to the strange men, then I am too," Isabella said, standing up. "That black skinned man has practically been calling my name."
"Talk about building international relationships," Hawke said.
"What? It relieves stress and puts everyone in a better mood," Isabella smirked.
"Some things never change," Aveline mused. "Have fun."
"I plan to, darling."
"Well, if everyone seems to be talking to the sky people, I might as well join in," Hawke said. "I got a few questions to ask Shepard. Did anyone see her?"
"Hey! Hello there!"
Zaeed turned around. The man who claimed he was a dwarf was walking towards him.
"You need something?" He asked.
"Just a couple of things," the man said, walking up. "You're not busy, are you?"
"Busy? More like bored sodding stiff. Guard duty is a bitch."
"That's what all the city guards gripe about. Varric."
"Zaeed."
"Nice to meet you, Zaeed. Strange name for a human."
"Said the dwarf."
"I guess you got a fair point there," Varric chuckled. "You wouldn't have any alcohol on your ship, would you?"
"Aren't you a stereotype," Zaeed laughed. "All the stories I've heard about dwarfs we that they drank like no tomorrow!"
"Stories? Those are facts!"
"And now you come up asking for some booze! What a riot!"
"Nothing like playing up to a stereotype, right? What would be your stereotype? A world-weary man who's seen far too much?"
"What made you guess that?"
"Do I really need to say it?" Varric asked. "You must have some damn good stories with all the scars you've got."
Tali scanned the holographic projector for the third time.
"Creator-Tali, there is no irregularity in the projector," Legion said.
"I know there's a problem with the projector," Tali insisted. "It just doesn't sound right."
"There is a high level of stress in your voice. Are you alright, Creator-Tali?"
"No, I'm not fine! We're stranded on an unknown planet with no way to get back, and our best defense is a faulty holographic projector!"
"Um...is this a bad time?"
Tali turned around. The elf woman was slowly walking up.
"I mean, if you want to yell at the air some more, please go ahead, don't mind me."
"What? Oh, I'm talking to a friend, I'm not yelling at the air," Tali said. "Legion, I'll call you back."
"Really? You can use magic to talk to people?"
"It's not magic, it's a communication system. Oh, that's right, you don't have very much tech here."
"What's this 'tech' you keep talking about?"
"It means 'technology.' How do I explain it? I guess you can say we can make metal work for us," Tali said.
"How strange. You don't have magic to use?"
"Where I come from, magic is only a bed time story for children."
"You can't use any magic? Not even to light a candle?"
"No, we have machines to do that. They're big, metal...things that can do that," Tali explained. "Do you need help with something?"
"Oh. Um, I was just wondering what the symbols on your suit meant. They look a lot like the symbols of my people."
"Really? They don't mean anything, they're just decoration. But they mean something to you?"
"Well, they look like a symbol or two, but it's just a pattern. Oh, how rude of me, I forgot to tell you my name. I'm Merrill."
"Tali."
Jacob threw the used thermal clip on the make-shift table.
"Whatever, Mordin. I'm done for the night," he said.
"But we've just started on the problem. We can't stop now, not when we need ammunition at a time like this," Mordin said.
"You can keep working at it, but I gotta take a break. I've pulled three straight shifts to get the Normandy up to snuff after our suicide mission, and this trans-whatever warp situation isn't helping my sleeping schedule. I need to relax," he said, turning off his omni-tool.
"Is this what you sky people do all the time?" Jacob looked up and saw the busty black haired woman walking towards him. "Talk at your glowey wrist things and fiddle with bits of metal?"
"Usually we get to shoot some things," Jacob chuckled. "You just had to catch us at a bad time."
"I bet," the woman said, leaning on the table. "Crashes are never a clean affair. Everything gets thrown tits up, and you try to get your shit together before someone catches you with your trousers down."
"Sounds like you have experience with that," Jacob said.
"Which part?"
"Hard to say. I don't know you well enough to guess."
"Let's fix that, shall we? Isabella."
"Jacob."
Hawke walked up to what looked like the front door of the strange ship. A group of uniformed men and women were gathered there, sitting on cartons, eating, or bringing things in and out of the ship.
"Can I help you?" One man asked.
"Yes. I'd like to speak to the Lady Shepard, please," Hawke said. "I'd like to ask her a few questions."
"'The Lady Shepard?'" The man laughed. "Oh, the Commander would get a kick out of that."
"I take it that's not her title," Hawke said, blushing a little.
"Technically her rank is 'Commander,'" the man replied. "But that's a military title, and we're not exactly a military organization. It's complicated." He twisted his wrist and the strange orange/yellow glow enveloped it. "Commander? I've got Captain Hawke here asking for you."
"I'm not a Captain."
"Just a regular old Hawke then."
"Tell him I'll be down in a minute," Shepard's voice said.
"Just wait a few, she'll be down," the man said, the strange wrist-thing disappearing.
"How do you do that?"
"Do what?"
"Make that glowing thing appear and disappear."
The man balked for a second.
"It's easy. You just kinda, you know, flex your fingers and sort of cock your wrist," he said. "Never had to describe it, before. You just get so used to it, you don't realize you're doing it anymore."
"And where does it go?" Hawke asked.
"It doesn't go anywhere. It's actually stored on this computer, er, box, right here," the man said. He pointed to a small purse-sized box attached to his waist. "What you see is just a hologram."
"And that would be..."
"Light," the man replied.
"You're not confusing our locals, are you?" Shepard said, walking out of the ship. Hawke was surprised; she wasn't wearing her armor. Instead, she was wearing a uniform like the ones the other men and women were wearing.
"No ma'am, he asked me first," the man said, snapping a crisp salute.
"Just giving you a hard time, private," Shepard grinned. "You need any help, Hawke?"
"Oh, right," he said, realizing that he was staring at her. "I just wanted to ask you a few questions about our situation right now."
"Sure thing," Shepard said, smiling. "You have any dinner? I'll grab you something before we start."
"So there we were, stranded in the middle of the Blood Pack camp, krogans all getting ready to kill us, and this dumb son of a bitch decides to be a hero. He leans out to get a shot off, and the sniper blows his head clean off," Zaeed said.
"Bullshit! There must've been something left," Varric laughed.
"I shit you not, he got hit with some kind of anti-material rifle," Zaeed said. "Nothing left but his neck. Blood spewing everywhere, it was a right mess."
"And krogans are like this Grunt we saw today?"
"Exactly the same. Now, Grunt is the biggest fucker you'll ever see, but other krogan aren't nothing to shrug off," Zaeed said.
"So what did you do?"
"We popped some smoke grenades. Couldn't see your hand in front of your face. The krogan just start unloading at us. They thought we would make a run for it in the smoke, but with that amount of fire all we could do was hunker down, sat it out.
"For three bloody minutes we sat there, the krogan shooting at nothing. Longest three minutes of your life, being pinned down under fire, especially that fire. Couldn't scratch your ass without having a few fingers getting shot off.
"Once the smoke started clearing, they stopped shooting. Now, I knew that they'd been firing nonstop for the past three minutes, so I take a gamble and guess that they're out of ammunition. So I lean up over the crate and start shifting heads. The bastards thought they were invincible! Didn't even try to hide, they just kept standing up and falling down! By then I got enough of their attention that they start walking away from our ship, so I hunker down and push my men forward. The krogan kept shooting at where we were, and we just snuck away."
"Just like that?"
"Just like that. Made it to the ship in record time. Now, once we turned the engines on, we get their attention. But we're already in the ship, and they couldn't hurt us. We figure that the only way the krogan could stop us is if they bomb their own camp."
"Did they?"
"The Blood Pack always did like their members incredibly goddamn stupid."
"I don't believe it!" Varric laughed. "They blew up their own camp?"
"Blew it sky high. Saved us the trouble of blowing it up ourselves. Got our payment and sold the bombs for a nice little bonus," Zaeed said.
"This is rich! Please tell me you got more!"
"What do you think? I'm actually curious to see what kind of stories you've gotten. You dwarfs are supposed to live a long life, aren't you?"
"That we do. And I got the perfect story for you. Should complement the one you just told."
"Hold on, I'm going to call Chambers out here. She loves a good story."
"See if she can bring back a few pints, too."
"And you just left?" Merrill said.
"We had to. We lost the war to the Geth. If we stayed on our planet, they would have killed us all," Tali said.
"That's so sad. I couldn't imagine what it would be like to lose a planet. And you still haven't gotten it back yet?"
"No, never. It's been hundreds of years since we walked on our own planet. Staying in space for so long changed us. That's why we have to wear these suits; it's far too easy for us to get sick."
"You are just like the Dalish," Merrill said sadly.
"Is that what your people call themselves?" Tali asked.
"Yes. Dalish elves are the descendants of the ancient elven empire. It stretched from coast to coast, all across the world," Merrill began. "We were proud, and we were immortal. The only time we actually had to die is if we willed it. From what my Keeper told me, rest her soul, the elves would craft the most exquisite magical items. We had...mirrors...that would let you talk to someone all the way across the world."
"That sounds incredible," Tali said. "I'm scared to ask what happened."
Merrill hung her head. The small fire she built was burning bright, but she still added another stick.
"The humans happened," she said. "We don't know where they came, but they brought tainted magic and dark desires with them. When they were around, time seemed to catch up with the elves. They aged and died. And the humans wanted what we had. They waged war on my ancestors, destroying home after home until the Dales were all that was left.
"Like the Quarians, we left. We abandoned all we had to live in whatever freedom we could find. The elves that stayed behind were conquered and became the city elves. The humans made them stay in alienages, and made them their slaves. Now we're just a shadow of our former selves."
"And you are not angry at the humans?" Tali asked.
"No, why should I be?"
"They took your homes, destroyed your family!"
"How can you travel with this Legion if he's one of the Geth who took your planet from you?" Merrill asked.
Tali balked for a second.
"I'm not sure," she said slowly. "I didn't like it when Shepard saved him, no, it. And I started to hate her when she activated Legion. After all they did to my people, and to Shepard, too. We spend so much time fighting them, how could we work with one?
"I don't know why I don't hate Legion. I should, but I don't. He helped us out so many times, and had even more chances to kill us, but didn't. But he does make a fair point. We made the Geth to be our slaves. I find it hard to hate them for wanting to be free."
"No one should ever be a slave," Merrill agreed. "If only Fenris was here. He'd be so glad I said that."
"Who is Fenris?"
"He was a friend of ours," Merrill said. "An elf, like me. But he wasn't a Dale. He was a city elf that was a slave to a mage. He hated magic, almost as much as he hated slavery."
"What happened to him? Why isn't he here?"
"It really is all Anders fault. Remember when I told you about the mages and the Circle?"
"The Circle wanted to control all mages, right?" Tali asked.
"Yes, and the Templars wanted to kill all the mages, or make them Tranquil. Anders blew up the Chantry, the one thing keeping the peace. So the Templars went crazy, with Meredith planning to kill all the mages. Hawke didn't want the mages to be killed, his sister being one. Fenris didn't like Hawke helping the mages, so he turned on us. We had to fight him. Hawke didn't want to kill Fenris, but he gave Hawke no choice."
"I'm sorry. That must've been hard for you to deal with," Tali said.
"I liked Fenris. He was grumpy, and angry, and hard to deal with, but once he started warming up to us, he was alright. Still grumpy and angry, but he was bearable. I hate to see elves die."
"Now do you believe me?" Isabella asked, putting the bottle down.
"Alright, so I can see the booze drinking, sword fighting part of you, but I still can't picture you as a pirate," Jacob said, refilling his own glass.
"This is some good stuff you got here," Isabella said, looking at the bottle. "Let me guess: it's the fact that I'm a woman?"
"Not so much that..."
"Is it because I'm so pretty?" Isabella grinned.
"That, too," Jacob admitted. "We've ran into pirates before. Usually they're shipping drugs or slaves. That's why I can't picture you as a pirate."
"Your pirates only sell drugs and slaves? What about pillaging ships?" Isabella asked.
"Most ships worth raiding are protected by warships," Jacob said.
"Ugh, if piracy only comes to drugs or slaves, I think I'll go legit," Isabella said. "Had to ships slaves once. Killed the men who wanted to sell them and freed them."
"That's a very good thing you did there," Jacob said, taking a drink.
"I think it had to be one of the dumbest mistakes I ever did," Isabella said. "Don't get me wrong, I'm glad I freed those slaves, but what happened afterwards was such a pain in the ass."
"What happened?"
"Well, like it or not, those slaves had a high price on them," Isabella said. "Castillon, the man who owned them, rightly wanted his money back from me. I didn't have that kind of money, so to make up for it, he had me steal a Qunari artifact."
"And Qunari are...?"
"Big, ash-skinned horned people. Very serious. Out of all the years I've seen Qunari, the only time I saw them show any emotion was anger. Anyways, I stole this artifact for him to sell, when a Qunari dreadnaught starts chasing me. To get rid of them, I sailed into a storm. We both get shipwrecked at Kirkwall for the next few years."
"A few years? I'd think that Castillon would get pissed it took you that long to steal something," Jacob said.
"Er, yea. Well, you see, in the wreck, I kind of lost the artifact," Isabella said, blushing.
"You lost this ancient artifact? How did you do that?"
"I told you, wrecks are nasty affairs," Isabella shot back. "I barely got away with my life. So for the entire time I'm in Kirkwall, I'm tracking down this artifact. Meanwhile, the entire city gets all kinds of uptight with the Qunari."
"So there's still racism here."
"I don't know, I've never given two shits about Qunari, unless they're trying to kill me. Most people hate them because they don't believe in the same blighted religion. Anyways, for the entire time we're there, people are getting more and more put off with the Qunari, eventually trying to set them up to seem like bad guys and killers. Finally, after a few years, the Qunari strike back."
"Sounds like a war broke out."
"It kind of did. The Qunari kind of struck first by seizing power of the city."
"How can you 'kind of' strike first?"
"Until then, people would only assassinate an odd Qunari, or try to frame them for some kind of crime. The Qunari took real military action. Just hours before they took over the city, I found the relic, stole it back, and caught the first caravan out of Kirkwall."
"You skipped town?"
"Well, for a little bit. Damn that Hawke, saving my hide and helping me out. It felt like I owed him more than I was giving him. I turned around and went back to return the artifiact."
"Sounds like all his good deeds were rubbing off on you."
"They must be. When I got back, the entire city had fallen to the Qunari. I snuck through the city, trying to find Hawke."
"In all that chaos?"
"Well, after following him for a few years, I got to know him," Isabella said. "Hawke always goes for the heart of the problem, and that problem would be the Arishok, the leader of the Qunari. They weren't at the compound given to the Qunari, so I snuck to the Viscount's chambers, the man who runs the city. Sure enough, Hawke was there, as well as the Arishok and his bodyguards."
"I take it they weren't too kind to see you there."
"Who, Hawke for the Qunari?"
"Both."
"I thought so, too," Isabella laughed, "but it turns out Hawke is a more forgiving than I thought he would be. The Arishok wasn't, though."
"If he was stuck there for years, looking for that artifact, I'd imagine he'd be," Jacob said. "Did he try to put you in jail or something?"
"More than that, they wanted to take me back with them. Probably torture me or turn me into some kind of brainless, drooling laborer," Isabella said. "But Hawke challenged the Arishok to single combat, with me as the trophy."
"Sorry, he what?"
"The Arishok wanted to take me with him, and Hawke didn't want that. So they dueled for my fate. Oh, you should have seen it! The Arishok was a huge blighter, but Hawke just wouldn't give up! Even when the Arishok broke his shield, Hawke still pressed on! And when he won, oh, it was the best!"
"I'll bet. You got to live another day."
"You're telling me. After that, the Qunari left as they had promised, and that was that," Isabella said.
"That's one hell of a story," Jacob said.
"It isn't. You should at least let Varric tell it to you."
"This is some good stew. What's it called?" Hawke asked.
"Chili. It's a classical Earth recipe," Shepard said.
"'Chili?' We have a similar stew we make. It's called 'mystery meat.'"
"You're joking!"
"I'm not."
"People just cook up a stew and fill it with whatever meat they find lying around?" Shepard asked.
"Just about. Of course, this stew is much better, with its spices and vegetables, but it's not that far off from the good old 'guess the meat of the day.'"
"I know I'm in a different world and all, but how do you eat something when you don't know what kind of meat is in it?"
"When you're trying to grab some food before your house is destroyed by an army, it's easy to forget where something came from," Hawke said.
"You were in a war?" Shepard asked.
"More like a slaughter," Hawke replied, finishing his food. "Kirkwall isn't my home city, I'm from a city called Lothering far in the south, in a country called Fereldan. About six years ago or so, there was a Blight, and my family and I had to run for our lives."
"What's a 'Blight?'"
"A Blight is when a dragon is corrupted by the Taint of the darkspawn, becomes an Archdemon, and leads the darkspawn horde above ground to destroy everything."
"I've heard about these darkspawn a couple times now. What are they?"
"They're...human-like, I guess," Hawke stammered. "Maker, how do I describe them? The Chantry says they're the descendants of the people who tried to meet the Maker in the Fade, but their sin corrupted them, turning them into monsters. But that really doesn't do much justice to them. They're like regular people, only completely feral, have evil looking teeth, and have poisoned blood."
"Their blood is toxic?"
"They carry the Taint in their blood," Hawke explained. "If you get poisoned by the Taint, like through a wound or getting blood squirted in your eye, you get the Taint. You either die slowly from it, or you turn into a darkspawn."
"That's terrible. Is there any cure?"
"The Grey Wardens might have a cure, but you'll have to ask Anders about that, he's a Grey Warden. The only cure I know of is a mercy killing."
Shepard shifted in her seat.
"Is it really that bad?" She quietly asked.
"It's worse," Hawke said. "Aveline's late husband was infected with the Taint. He asked for a quick death before a long, painful one. He begged her to be the one, and Aveline accepted it. She drove a blade into his chest."
"Dear God. No one should have to kill a friend or a loved one," Shepard said.
"I agree. Aveline has to be one of the strongest people I know; she barely batted an eye when her husband asked for death. Somehow, we all made it through, and got to Kirkwall. Aveline became a guard, Bethany and I joined a mercenary group for a year, and our mother was taken in by our uncle."
"Was Aveline okay? She didn't try to do anything...rash, did she?"
"Like take her own life? No, Aveline is stronger than that."
Shepard stiffened.
"Is everything alright?" Hawke asked.
"How dare you?" Shepard spat. "You have no idea what it's like to go through something as terrible as that."
"I don't know what it's like?" Hawke said. "Have I offended you?"
"Yes, you've done a pretty good job pissing me off," Shepard said.
"I apologize, I didn't mean to offend you," Hawke said. "And I do have an idea of what it's like to lose someone. I lost my brother Carver to the darkspawn when we were trying to flee."
"Your brother?"
"That's just from the darkspawn. Just recently, my mother was killed by an insane killer."
"I'm sorry for your loss."
"Thank you. If you don't mind, can I ask what made you so offended?"
"No, Hawke, you can't ask. That's very personal to me," Shepard said.
"I understand," Hawke said, playing with his empty bowel. "Can I at least thank you for all the help you've given us? Like saving our lives and giving us a place to stay?"
"That you can do."
"There were how many pirates?" Yeoman Kelly asked.
"Fifteen. All of them armed to the teeth and mean looking like Zaeed over here," Varric said, finishing his beer.
"Bollocks," Zaeed said. "Fighting fifteen pirates? That's a one-way ticket to the afterlife."
"That may be true in your world, but not in ours," Varric said. "So as I was saying, we get out of the cave on the Wounded Coast with the kidnapped girl, and there in the moonlight are fifteen pirates. They're a real mean bunch, scars you can see from a mile away, carrying big, scary looking weapons. Broadswords that are the size of a human kid, chipped and battered from long years of hacking off limbs, maces stained rust brown from countless skull bashed open, and long, needle-like daggers with worn blood grooves."
"Oh my," Kelly gasped.
"I had a few choicer words to say about the matter, but Hawke didn't. He just turned to me and said,
"'Well Varric, this is a good mess we've gotten into.'
"'A good mess?' I say. 'Hawke, we've gonna die! What were we thinking, rescuing the magistrate's daughter from a band like this?'
"'What's done is done,' Hawke said. 'Protect the girl, I'll take care of the pirates.' Before I can say anything, Hawke charges into the pirates, bellowing like an ogre! He knocks down three of them before one pirate with a hammer brings him to a halt. He's about to bash Hawke's head open when his blade shoots out, a blur in the moonlight, and the pirate is staggering off, his arms severed at the elbow.
"The pirates are charging him, but Hawke just keeps on fighting. His blade is arcing over raised shields, sneaking past parried blows, and finding pirate flesh with each swing. When a pirate tries to slip past him, Hawke bashes his head open with his shield! He took a few blows in the side when that happened, but it doesn't seem to slow him down. In fact, each time he gets hit, Hawke seems to fight harder and harder!
"I'm staring at this, wondering if my friend can make it out of there alive. I could only get a shot or two off, but I can't do much because the pirates are too close to Hawke; if I miss, I could very well shoot my own friend."
"How did it end?" Kelly asked.
"'How did it end?' The man's sitting not ten meters away from us!" Zaeed said.
"It ended just as quickly as it started," Varric said, ignoring Zaeed. "Hawke was the only one left standing. He was bleeding from ten different wounds, but he didn't seem the least bit hurt. So we gather up the girl and leave before more kidnappers show up. The morning was breaking when we got back from the Wounded Coast, but when we get to the girl's home, we see that her parents hadn't slept a wink.
"They were overjoyed when we brought their girl home safe and sound. The magistrate wanted to pay us her weight in gold, but Hawke only took a few sovereigns for himself and his family. I took a few more coin than he did, but that's because I'm a lesser man."
"Let me guess: you rescued her from her kidnappers, then you rescued her from her virginity," Zaeed said.
"Zaeed, how could you! Hawke and Varric risked their lives to save that poor girl!" Kelly said.
"I can't pull the wool over your eyes, can I?" Varric chuckled.
"What do you mean, 'pull the wool over his eyes?'" Kelly asked.
"It means the dwarf was lying to us," Zaeed said.
"All that was a lie?" Kelly said.
"It's just as I told Hawke, doll," Varric said. "To make a good hero, you take one part down to earth, one part noble, two parts crazy fool, and then you sprinkle liberally with wild falsehoods. Next you know, you've got yourself a hero. Not that all my stories are lies; most good stories are based on real happenings."
"Then why tell stories at all if you're just going to lie through your teeth?" Zaeed asked.
"The way I see it, history is a big book of tales; all the ones that stuck," Varric said. "I want my stories to get in there one day."
"You're an alien, a different race than us. How can we understand each other so well?" Merrill asked.
"My suit has a built-in translator," Tali said. "It's translating your language into mine, as well as my language into yours."
"And that doesn't strike you as magical?"
"While I like your theory that our machines manipulate magic, I can assure you that there is no magic where we come from," Tali said.
"And you keep saying that our world has this 'science' in it, but that's the realm of magic," Merrill said. "There are things in the world that just need magic to exist."
"I can say the same thing about how a world needs dark matter to exist," Tali said.
"You mean mater that's in the darkness?"
"No, it means it's-right, no big explanations. It's complicated."
"But how can you say something exists if you can't see it?" Merrill asked.
"Have you heard of the theory of gravity?"
"What's gravity?"
"Gravity is the force that pulls things down," Tali said. "If I were to throw this rock up, gravity will pull it down."
"That's just the rock falling," Merrill said.
"But that's gravity working on the rock. You can't see gravity, but it affects you."
"I think my brain is starting to hurt," Merrill said. "All this talk about things that don't exist is exhausting."
"Once you start learning about things, it gets better," Tali promised.
"I think I'll leave the invisible-force-things to you," Merrill said. "I'll stick to my magic."
"How does magic even work here?" Tali asked.
"Well, if you're born being touched by magic, you can use magic," Merrill said. "I don't think anyone knows why magic happens, it just does. We all accept it, and use it as best as we can."
"Then how do you use it? Is it like using a muscle to pick up a weight?"
"Yes, it's exactly like that," Merrill said. "It takes some concentrating, but it's easy to do. See?"
Merrill opened her hand, creating a ball of lightening.
"May I?" Tali asked, holding up her omni-tool covered hand.
"I wouldn't touch it if I were you," Merrill said.
"It's not like that, I just want to get some readings," Tali said, waving her omni-tool by the small ball of electricity. "Fascinating. This is pure electricity you're creating. No static generators, no external or internal batteries, no laser-heated plasma, nothing."
"It's like magic, right?" Merrill asked, smiling.
"I would say so," Tali chuckled, reading the readings. "And here's the spike in Element Zero, just like a normal biotic effect. How strange."
"What's an element zero? Is it like fire and frost?"
"No, those aren't real elements to us. Element Zero is what we use to fuel our ship."
"Because your ship is different than the ships that sail the sea, right?"
"That's exactly right. And are those water skins you have?"
"No, those are lyrium potions."
"Can I see one? I keep getting a strange reading from them."
"Sure," Merrill said. She pulled a skin of lyrium skin from her pack and gave it to Tali, who waved her omni-tool over it.
"So you do have Element Zero," she said, excitement creeping into her voice. "These readings are exactly the same to our eezo, only more diluted."
"What does that mean?" Merrill asked.
"I think I might be able to get our ship to run on this 'lyrium' instead of Element Zero," Tali said. "I'll have to run tests on this, of course, but this just might be our way off this planet and back to our own!"
"Okay, I'm at my limit," Jacob said, putting his glass down.
"So soon? But we're almost through the bottle," Isabella said.
"Any more and I'll go from a good drunk to a sick drunk. I know my limits," Jacob said, trying to get up without falling over. "You can keep your coin."
"What's the point of having money when you can't win or lose it?" Isabella said. "Besides, it's just a simple game of coppers. It's not like losing a few would break me."
"I still can't believe you use real gold and real silver in your coins."
"Well, what else would we use?"
"Where we come from, we use credits. Credits aren't real, physical money, but electronic money that is based on how much gold or silver a country has."
"Where's the fun in that?"
"You can carry your entire fortune on you, and it won't break your back."
"Gold does tend to get very heavy very quick," Isabella nodded.
"Why is copper the least expensive currency?" Jacob asked, looking a copper piece over. "Don't you know how valuable this stuff is?"
"Copper? Valuable?" Isabella laughed. "If you think it's valuable, I'll give you as much as you can carry. Robbed some Templars blind before we left, and I've got too much to carry."
"Credits would come in handy there," Jacob said. He ran his omni-tool over the piece. "Damn, this really is pure copper! Can you seriously give me all the copper you have?"
"Sure, but it would cost you," Isabella said in a sing-song voice. "What would you need it for, anyways?"
"Copper is great at conducting heat, moving it around," Jacob said, sitting down with the copper pieces. "Our weapons generate heat when they fire, and use thermal clips to keep them cool. But we can make copper cooling plates to replace the ammunition!"
"You're getting awfully giddy over a piece of metal. Isn't there something else that excites you?" Isabella asked. Jacob looked up from the gun he was fiddling with.
"You're serious."
"What else would I be playing drinking games with you for?"
"I thought you were being friendly."
"That's one way of calling it," Isabella said.
"Well, shit, this can wait for the morning."
"If you want to help out, you can help carry things out of the ship, or help Rupert, our chef, cook food," Shepard said, getting up. "Good night, Hawke."
"Are you sure? I'm sure Isabella might know a little metal crafting. We can help with more than just grunt labor..."
"Good night, Hawke," Shepard said, storming away before Hawke could try to apologize for whatever he did.
"You sure got her angry," Tali said, walking up with Merrill.
"You made a woman angry? That isn't like you, Hawke," Merrill giggled.
"I don't know what I said," Hawke said. "I was just trying to be helpful."
"Thank you, but we need specialized workers to fix our ship," Tali said. "You'd just be getting in the way, no offense."
"None taken. I think."
"And don't worry about Shepard. She doesn't get angry very much, but she's fairly quick to forgive. Just don't insult her, she never forgives that."
"That's the thing, I think I might have insulted her," Hawke said.
"Oh boy," Tali said. "Well, just hope that she knows you meant no harm. It's easier to forgive ignorance than cruel intention."
"I sure hope so."
"Well, if she's in a bad mood, then I probably shouldn't talk to her," Tali said. "The good news would have to wait. Guess that means more time for me to run experiments. Doesn't look like I'll be getting much sleep."
"Would this good news be good for you, or good for all of us?"
"Only us, unfortunately."
"Tali thinks she can use our lyrium potions as fuel for their ship," Merrill said.
"First they come from the sky, then they have non-demonic abomination-like aliens, and now their ship runs on magic?" Hawke asked.
"Keelah se'lai, it's not magic, it's a simple mass effect field generator!"
"Um, Tali, you're talking about your magical 'tech' again," Merrill said, smiling.
"Oh, sorry," Tali said, shifting awkwardly. "Well, I better get to work on this. It was good talking to you, Merrill."
"I'll see you in the morning," Merrill called after Tali as she walked into the ship.
"Looks like you made a new friend," Hawke said.
"You'd never believe it, but she's just like the Dalish," Merrill said. "Exiled from their home and everything."
"I guess we really do have a lot in common."
"Hopefully we'll be able to meet the other 'aliens' Shepard said she had on her ship. Speaking of her, what did you do to get her upset?"
"I must have said something, because she got really, really mad," Hawke said. "Hopefully I can make it up to her later."
"I'm sure you will. Maybe Isabella is having better luck with getting to know these sky people than you are."
"I think we both know that Isabella has a way with being liked," Hawke said. Merrill giggled.