So, I'm back. I still can't decide who I should pair Katsuki with. I'm thinking between Izuku and Shouto? Who do you think would be the best? Please give me suggestions about the pairing, people. And if I can't decide by a certain point in the story, I'll... um... pair Katsuki with both of them? Yeah, I'll do that. But I've never written an OT3 before so I have no idea how I'm going to do it. Anyways, let's worry about that later. For now, just enjoy this chapter. Oh, and I should tell you, the violence isn't in this chapter, it's in the next.
Bakugou punches an asshole. The Bakusquad have a sleepover.
Chapter 4:
One of the problems of having shitty friends like mine is that I am constantly getting dragged into things I have absolutely no wish to be a part of. And the monthly sleepover is one of them.
I don't know when we developed this, but over the years, it has become sort of a custom for us to have a sleepover at Kirishima's house once every month. Last month, we could not uphold this tradition (fortunately) because of all the shitty schoolwork and Kaminari being hospitalized and all that. But now that Kaminari's been released from the hospital and we are all free, we are having the sleepover tonight.
And it's going to be extra fancy, since we missed one last month, and also because it is supposed to be a sort of welcome party for Kaminari.
If you ask me, they're just using that as an excuse to be more dramatic. Tch, fucking drama queens.
Basically, to sum it all up, the sleepover is that time of the month when Kirishima and Kaminari have an excuse to get drunk and do stupid things, Ashido and Sero cheer them on, while I drink myself to oblivion so that I don't have to question my shitty choice in friendship.
Right, now that I have given a satisfactory description of the dreaded sleepover, let's get to the real thing.
As soon as classes are over, I rush out of the school building, hoping to get to gym earlier. As the sleepover is tonight, I will have to finish all the homework before going, because God knows those party animals would never let me study during the sleepover. And if I am going to finish all my homework early, I have to finish my gym hours early as well, which is why I am rushing out of the school building right after the bell.
Unfortunately, luck does not seem to be on my side. Just as I am about to exit the building, I bump into our class's biggest asshole.
And yeah, believe it or not, there are even bigger assholes than me in our class.
The Asshole, as I will call him from now on because I've never bothered to learn the bastard's name, glares at me when I bump into him, but as soon as he sees it is me, his glare transforms into a sneaky smirk which I do not like at all. In response to his lips curling upwards, mine curl even more downwards than before. As if I was not in enough of a bad mood already.
"Well, well, well!" He drawls out, "If it isn't the delinquent! Mind telling me what sort of delinquency you're up to these days? One would think that getting suspended for three months would be enough of a punishment, but I guess you never know!"
I grit my teeth. I really want to punch him so bad right now, but I'm already on probation. If I commit one more act of violence withing the school premises, I'll be getting suspended. I bet The Asshole knows that and is taking advantage of it right now.
"Back off, jerk," I say, "Get away while you have the chance. You don't wanna mess with me."
He laughs. He fucking laughs. God, I don't know if I can handle much more of his idiocy. God help him if I loose my temper. If there is one person in the world who manages to piss me off more than Deku, then it's definitely this guy.
"Ooh, and what are you going to do to me if I don't? Hit me? Bite me? Well, I suppose that's exactly the kind of behavior expected from a delinquent like yourself!"
"Listen up, fucker. Back off while you still have the chance. I'm feeling fucking merciful right now, you see, but if you say one more thing, I won't be very merciful anymore."
Once again proving just how much shit his brain is filled with, The Asshole sneers obnoxiously. I don't know how it is possible for the mere presence of someone to piss me off so much, but this guy is currently making me want to bash his skull in.
"Ah, I suppose I can't expect anything better from someone like you," He said, as if I was some rug beneath his feet, "Such a shame too, a pretty girl such as yourself. If only you could just stop with those gangster ways and act tame and nice like a damsel in distress, you would be so desirable. I mean, such a nice body, wasted on fighting while it could be doing so much more. Like, say, pleasuring-"
CRACK!
I can practically hear his nose break as my fist lands on his face. He barely has any time to react as the impact pushes him onto the wall. He lets out a girly squeak, which is music to my ears, and the crunching sound of his nose breaking is just so utterly satisfying.
I can't believe that idiot tried to- tried to- objectify me. Like my body is supposed to just be a means of pleasuring people. How dare that bastard even suggest such a thing? I don't care if I land myself another suspension, The Asshole deserved that punch.
I take a few deep breaths to calm myself. I am still shaking with rage at that bastard.
"Bakugou?" A voice asks from behind me, sounding extremely tired. I immediately recognize it to be Aizawa-sensei, or Professor Bag-eyes, as I like to call him.
I turn around, fearing the worst. My fist is clenched and there is some blood on it, and The Asshole is lying on the ground with his back to the wall, clutching his broken nose and trying to keep from crying. It would be obvious to anyone who sees the situation to figure out what has just transpired here. Fuck, Professor Bag-Eyes really has the worst timing, doesn't he?
"Hello, Sir," I say, trying to seem polite and hiding my grimace, but knowing myself, I probably looked like a murderer caught while trying to escape. Everyone knows being polite isn't my thing.
Aizawa-sensei glances at The Asshole and then back to me.
"You broke Monoma's nose?" He sounds more amused than anything, which makes me really surprised. Isn't he gonna scold me? Send me to the Principal's office?
"Yeah," I say, because there's no point in trying to lie to him.
Aizawa-sensei lets out a huff, half amused and half exasperated. He robs his eyes, muttering, "I'm not paid enough for this shit."
I give him a confused look. He finally stops muttering about his salary and turns to me, saying, "Just this once, I'm letting you get away, Bakugou. But only because Monoma's an asshole and I myself have been wanting to do that for quite some time now. Now get going before someone else appears and does not have this much mercy."
I am really surprised, but in the end, my common sense is much more. I mutter a bashful 'thank you' before speeding away from the school. Huh, it's no secret that Monoma(now I know his name) isn't very popular among the teachers, but to think it is to the extent of them letting me get away with breaking his nose in the school. You learn knew things every day.
I can't wait to tell the others I broke his nose. They'd be kissing my feet.
"You broke Monoma Neito's nose?!" Sero exclaims incredulously, "No way!"
I smirk as I pour a few more popcorn into my mouth. "Yes way."
I am currently lying on Kirishit-ma's bed, eating popcorn, dressed in my favorite pajamas with explosion designs. Shitty hair and Pikachu are on the floor, somehow managing to cuddle, fight, spread weird rumors on Instagram and laugh in their overly-obnoxious was at the same time. Ashido is on the other side of the bed, her eyes glued to her pink phone. Sero's on the chair, laughing at what I assume is the mental image of Monoma Neito, aka The Asshole, with a broken nose.
"And Aizawa-sensei said nothing? Nothing?" Kiri asks with awe, "Man, I wish I'd been there to witness that historical moment."
"It's not fair!" Kaminari complains, "Why is Kacchan always the one to get to see the special things? Even the time when Mineta got caught by Aizawa-sensei while trying to steal girls' underwear, it was Katsuki! Why is it never me?"
"That's obvious, because you're an idiot," I say, and wing my leg blindly, hoping to hit Kaminari's head. It works, and I feel extreme satisfaction at the sound of Pikachu hitting the floor and his agonized scream. I have such perfect aim, I don't even have to look to give that shithead a beating.
"No! What are you doing? I just got back from the hospital, you're not supposed to be hitting patients!" Kaminari whines, and earns himself another kick.
"OW!" He screams and I roll my eyes.
"Stop being such a baby," I say. Seriously, he is such a drama queen. I didn't even hit that hard. If he's planning on crying and whining like all those cliche girls in the movies, then he can just forget about ever getting revenge on those that did that do him. And if he's able to whine this much without getting tired, then he's definitely doing just fine.
"Hay, I just got an idea!" Kirishima says excitedly, cutting off whatever the Pikachu had been about to say next.
"Hey, that was really rude, man. I was just about to-" The Pikachu tries again, but this time, it is Ashido who cuts him off.
"No one cares what you've got to say, Hun," She says to Kaminari, and then turning to Kirishima, adds, "Now, what idea did you say you got?"
Kaminari pouts at being ignored, while Kiri gives Ashido a weird look. "Wait, you were actually listening? I thought you were too busy with your phone. Anyways, back to the topic. What I was saying is, we should prank call Midoriya!"
As soon as he says it, my interest in the sleepover increases tenfold.
"I'm in!" I yell, because I am all about seeing Deku embarrass himself. Tell you what, we've actually done this before, and Deku has never, ever managed to figure out who we are. Not once.
"Oh yeah! let's do it!" Kaminari says. He seems to have gotten over his grief of being ignored.
"I'm in too!" screams Ashido, though I think it's rather unnecessary. If three of us are in favor, the other two don't really need to voice their opinion. But Ashido's always been a little extra.
Sero doesn't say anything. Instead, he just climbs out of the chair and plops down beside Kirishima and Kaminari, showing that he, too, was totally in board with the idea.
Kaminari is chosen to be the one to do it. Partly because he was really good at it, and mostly because Kirishima did not want to upset him right after he had gotten back from the hospital. If you ask me, that's a load of bull. If he can still stand after getting kicked by me two times, then he can surely handle a little sorrow of not being able to prank someone.
Kaminari pulls out the cheap spare phone that he and Kirishima purchased solely for the purpose of prank calling. He dials Deku's number, puts it on loud speaker and the call is picked up in a second. I don't know how Deku does it, but somehow, he always manages to pick up the phone within a second of being called. I guess it's the one thing he's better than me at. That, and kissing All Might's feet.
"Hello? Who is it?"
Kaminari immediately switches to his 'Todoroki Voice'. He answers in a perfect replica of Half 'n Half. "Hello, Midoriya. I am Todoroki."
"Eh? But you can't be Todoroki-kun! Todoroki-kun's right here with me! Is someone trying to prank me?"
All our eyes widen. None of us have been expecting that. But to our defense, how were we supposed to know that Half 'n Half was gonna be with Deku? Actually, what are they doing together at this time, anyway? Are they also having a sleepover. No, no, no, that seems a bit too convenient.
Contrary to our expectations, Pikachu does not crack and give himself away. He manages to make a quick recovery, although I don't think it's a very good one.
He switches to an exact replica of Tokoyami's voice and says, "Uh, you found me out. I am actually Tokoyami. I needed some help with Aizawa-sensei's homework. I called Ojiro but he did not know the answers himself. He gave me your number, though and told me to call you."
I facepalm. Because seriously? Tokoyami Fumikage, the mysterious emo boy of our class, is the last person on earth who would ever prank call someone. How could anyone ever fall for that?
But once again proving just how stupid he really is, Deku actually buys it. Really, his stupidity never fails to amaze me. "Oh, Tokoyami-kun! What did you have a problem with? I've already finished all the homework, so I can help with anything you need!"
Ashido and Sero are clutching their stomachs to hide their laughter, while Kirishima is squirming very uncomfortably, his mouth clamped shut with his hands. I am staring at the phone in amazement, because how could one person possibly be so trusting? Finally, Ashido and Kirishima can't hold it anymore and they start laughing. Sero follows soon after, and seeing them, I can't hold back a sneer either.
Kaminari makes a gesture for us to shut up and we do so with much difficulty. A voice comes from the other side of the phone, but this time, it's not Deku. It's the voice of Half 'n Half.
"Midoriya, who are you talking to?"
And Deku says, "It's just Tokoyami-kun, He says he need some help with homework."
I feel slightly disgruntled at hearing them talk as if we don't exist, but then I realize they probably don't know they are on loud speaker.
"Give me the phone, Midoriya," Todoroki says calmly. There are some sounds, probably Deku handing the phone to him. And then Todoroki's voice greets us, "Hello."
Kaminari struggles to keep his composure. But he manages to respond. "Is it Todoroki? I didn't know you were with Midoriya. Am I interrupting something?"
Kirishima and I let out a sneer at Kaminari's suggestive tone when saying 'am i interrupting something'. It's definitely not something Tokoyami would ever say in his life, but it's funny as hell. Especially with Kaminari wiggling his eyebrows, which only we can see. I don't know how the fuck Ashido and Sero are not laughing their asses off right now. Huh, guess they have a bit more self-restraint that I give them credit for.
"No, you are not interrupting anything, Kaminari. I wonder why you're pretending to be Tokoyami, though."
Immediately, Kirishima and I stop laughing and we all become still. Damn, how the fuck does half 'n half know that. Kaminari's Tokoyami impression is so good that it even managed to impress me, so how could Todoroki figure it out? Is he a psychic or something? I wouldn't put it past him, I've always thought he was a bit shady.
Clearly, that was sarcasm. I'm not superstitious like the Pikachu and Shitty Hair, fuckers.
"What are you talking about, Todoroki? I am Tokoyami, not Kaminari." Pikachu tries one last time.
A huff can be heard. It's that annoying huff Todoroki gives when he's amused or annoyed. I'm not sure which one it is right now. "Kaminari, it's clear you're not Tokoyami. I could hear Bakugou and Kirishima's laughter from the background, so don't even try to pretend. Otherwise, it was a very good impression, though."
"Eh, that was Kaminari-kun?" says Deku.
Finally, Kaminari cracks. "Man, Todoroki! Did you have to blow my cover?! But damn, you're really good at observing, aren't you?"
"Yes, if I do say so myself. If it's any consolation, I wouldn't have figured it out had it not been for Kirishima and Bakugou's sneers."
"Yes, yes, it's a great consolation to know that my mimicking powers are still top notch. Well, catch ya later, Todoroki. Bye!" Without even giving Todoroki a chance to properly respond, Kaminari ends the call and sighs with relief.
There is a moment of silence. And then, all of us are roaring with laughter.
It's a long time before we finally get to sleep. It's 4 am but we all agree that we are going to need all the sleep we can get, so we hastily make the bed and lay out blankets on the floor. Ashido and I immediately hog the bed to ourselves and force the guys to the floor. Sero is put between Kirishima and Kaminari because we don't trust those two next to each other. It takes some time, but we are all comfortable and ready to get some sleep.
Because we definitely won't be getting any sleep tomorrow. Because tomorrow, we are going to seek out our enemy's lair, pulverize their leader, and set fire to their hideout.
We are such courteous people, after all, returning the favor twice the amount.
Review, follow, and fav.