Camilia was not present when Anders the apostate, a female warrior named Mhairi, and Oghren took the Joining. It wasn't her place anymore. She was the queen, not the Warden-Commander. The girl, Mhairi, didn't make it. And she was reminded of something Duncan had once said about the sacrifice being made sooner or later.
As Camilia sat there in the dining hall at Vigil's Keep, eating dinner, she couldn't help but glance in Sidona's direction from time to time. She was a rather attractive woman, but Camilia had already given her heart to Leliana and besides she was also married to the king. But she wondered if the Orlesian knew something about Grey Warden fertility that she didn't.
"Ser Andras," she addressed the elf. "Could I please talk to you privately after supper?"
"Of course, your Majesty!" Sidona's face brightened considerably. "I'll be in my quarters tonight. We can talk there without interruption."
And so she waited. The room was not as fancy as she had expected. Most Orlesian abodes were downright tacky. But then, the Warden-Commander had not been permitted much time to unpack either with all the darkspawn about and apostates to Conscript.
At last she appeared. Sidona entered the room, apologized for her tardiness, and took a seat across from the queen. She then proceeded to let down her dark hair from its various clips and ties. Then she sighed and smiled wearily. There was a certain grace about her that was far greater than even the queen's own.
"Ser Andras-" Camilia began, but was quickly cut off.
"Please call me Sidona," the elf implored her. "We are both Wardens here, yes?"
"That's actually part of why I need to speak with you, Sidona." The Orlesian grew very attentive and gestured for her to continue, but she didn't know how to begin. "You see, King Alistair and I are both Wardens as well, and that raises some questions about...producing an heir."
"You wish to know if it is possible for two individuals who share the taint to have a child?" Camilia could only nod. She suddenly didn't trust her voice. "It is a topic I have researched thoroughly. I loved a man once - sadly, duty parted us in the end - but I was after the same answers you seek."
"And did you...did you find anything?" the queen asked.
"I did," Sidona confirmed, looking at her with pity in her eyes. "It is not impossible for a Warden to sire or birth a child with someone who is untainted, though it is quite rare, and in the case of two Wardens together..."
"What?"
"I'm sorry," the Orlesian said genuinely. "It has never happened before. That does not necessarily mean it cannot, but you don't have forever to try, especially when the throne requires an heir. You and your husband are the last of your lines, no?"
"It can't be..." She refused to believe it. "There has to be another way. What about magic?" Sidona shook her head. She would know, after all. Magic could not remove the taint from their blood, at least not yet anyway. "Then I could go to Weisshaupt and-"
"Camilia - may I call you Camilia?" The queen nodded. "Camilia, believe me when I say that the First Warden himself would not be able to give you a better answer, nor the one you want to hear. I truly am sorry."
Had she married Alistair for nothing? And what of Leliana? Had she ruined the bard's life because Maker, she loved her? She loved her so much and she'd ruined all their lives, hadn't she? How could she have thought it would all work out somehow? True, the Blight was over, but that didn't guarantee a happy ending.
"What am I going to do?" she wondered aloud.
"It is not unheard of, in Orlais," Sidona began slowly. "For an emperor to wed a barren woman and sire a child by another. Of course the empress has a say in who will bear the child. The surrogate is then highly respected."
"I've never heard of any such thing taking place in Ferelden."
The Orlesian shrugged. "It is something to consider."
Indeed it was. What choice did she have, after all?
Camilia lay awake that night next to Alistair, knowing she would have to tell him eventually but unable to bring herself to do it just yet. It was more important that the heir have Theirin blood than hers, so he truly would have to bed another woman. There was no other way.
What pained Camilia wasn't that she could not have a Warden's child, but that she could not fulfill her duty.
She missed Leliana whose singing and mere presence somehow made everything all right.
They left Amaranthine the next day since the situation appeared to be more or less resolved aside from the troubling detail of a talking darkspawn. Camilia believed the arling was in capable hands even so. Sidona wished her luck and bid them farewell, then the king and queen as well as the small army of guards they were obligated to travel with embarked on a long journey home to Denerim.
The nation could not run itself, that was for sure.