Unsure, nervously shaking her lips gently parted as she moved slowly over his mouth waiting for a sign, for a single movement from him so she would know that her feelings were reciprocated.

It was the biggest risk she had ever taken in her life, a gamble of her heart, and the most important friendship she had ever had.

Seconds seemed like forever as she waited for the slightest validation that what had been building between them for years was not just mutual respect and understanding of a life spent in the shadows of abuse, shame and loneliness that ran deeper than an ocean of tears, but something much more.

She could hear the sharp intake of his breath as his body tensed against her, and then nothing, as if he was frozen unable to move.

His answer was obvious.

Blood rushed from her face realizing that she had made a huge mistake, that everything that Ed had told her was true, that she had just destroyed something very precious between them because she was greedy and selfish and just plain foolish thinking she could ever have more.

Carol backed away quickly letting her arms slip from around his neck ducking out from his towering body limping towards the cot she fumbled for words to fix what she had done.

"Just please forget I just did that, I'm dehydrated, exhausted ….after a good night's sleep I'll be able to figure out my next move from here, you need to get back to the prison. "

Covering her face she could hear Ed's words in her head, his repetitive alcoholic degrading ramblings that she could never forget no matter how much time had passed since he was dead in the ground.

Worthless

Pathetic

Ugly

'No.'

It was just one word, just one small whisper of a word inside her head but it was fierce, powerful, carrying with it the weight of the unwavering knowledge that she was not that woman, that she had faced hell and beaten it back more times than she could ever imagine possible.

Rubbing her leg feeling the sharp pain in her knee she swallowed back her tears.

She was strong, a survivor, and she would never be seen or treated less than what she truly was ever again.

Within her thoughts she was vaguely aware of his restless movements back and forth but didn't pay much attention.

She could her him packing, and unpacking, hear the arrangement of cans and water bottles but refused to look up searching for a way to move past this.

Ed was wrong about the woman she was inside but the reality of her age and the evidence of what she had been through marked with lines across her face and the grey in her hair was clearly not what men desired.

It was no one's fault, just the cold hard reality of life.

Lost in her thoughts she barely noticed the sagging of the thin mattress next to her as he sat down close enough so they were touching.

Building up the walls inside her again would take time, accepting the damage she most likely had caused between them would be harder, but she had faced worse.

Challenging God or the universe or whoever the hell was out there she silently laughed to herself trying to hold it together.

'You keep trying to break me, don't you realize by know that it's impossible… I cannot – '

That's when she heard him next to her; it was her name barely recognizable, but it was there.

Bracing herself for what was coming she sat very still pulling her strength from deep inside ready to take whatever he was going to throw at her.

Again he whispered her name…

"Carol."

It was louder this time, laced with uncertainty and a shyness that was beyond vulnerable and very much real.

"I'm not going anywhere without you."

Nodding she took a deep breath thankful for the loyalty of his friendship.

He knew she was missing the point, that she couldn't see him struggling, that she was so caught up in her own head and the bullshit that Ed had put there that she was blind to the fact that this was almost impossible for him.

Daryl had carried the pain of rejection, the years of humiliation and abuse from everyone he ever cared about, it was etched in his skin, always there just beneath the surface, a permanent reminder of what he could never have.

To trust, to let someone in that way was beyond terrifying, but she had crossed the line, taken the chance with him, it was either risk it all or lose her forever.

Gathering her courage she turned to look at him, she spoke softly kindly, releasing him from any responsibility that he felt he had for her.

"Daryl, you have to go back... "

Her voice trailed off when she felt his hand cradle her face angling her mouth close to his.

With each word his lips brushed against hers breathlessly finding his way awkwardly, clumsily pushing past all his fears knowing there was no turning back, realizing at that moment that he didn't have a choice, not with her, never with her.

"I thought I lost you… again. I'm not about to let you go…not now, not ever."