PRESENT.

Spencer's heart hammered in her chest as she hurried to straighten up her house. She didn't care what anything was, she just threw in into the trash. Upon picking up random things off her floor, she overcame a photo that her sister, Melissa, had given her in jail. It was the last time she or her parents had ever visited Spencer. The rim of her eyes filled with tears, still exploring the photo of her and her family. The picture was taken on their only family trip to London. She remembered because it was where Melissa met her later on to be husband, Wren Kingston.

Spencer laughed as she remembered the day she and Wren played the Hastings family game of "High Low" and shared his drink with her. She knew she would like him which wasn't normal because Spencer never liked any of her sister's boyfriends. Coming to think about it, Spencer never liked any guy because she only had her eyes on one girl, her best friend. Her crush, Emily Fields.

Still, after ten years, Spencer couldn't stop thinking about the former swimmer. During her time in prison, she wanted to hate Emily so bad but she couldn't. Every time she tried to, like now, her mind would always drift off to all the kisses, the touches, and the whispers she and Emily would share with each other.

She took a deep breath and sat the family picture on the nearest table and plopped onto her couch. She knew today was going to be hell, she knew today, everything had to be said and admitted and forgived. No, not forgived. I won't forgive her. She thought to herself running her fingers through her thick, chocolate brown hair. But I have to. She's my always and forever. Spencer pounded her hands on her head, letting the tears fall. She ruined your life and plus, she's getting married.

"God, I'm going fucking crazy." She mumbled to herself. "Why can't I just forget about her? There's plenty of girls that'll want me."

But you're not going to want them. You'll always want her. She's your forever and always, she's your happy ending. And you want her, no matter how much you think or say you don't, you want her and you will have her. Come on Spence, you're a Hastings you should know this. Spencer's conscience rambled in her head.

"It's not that easy," She buried her head in her hands and began to breathe heavily. "Don't cry, don't cry." She whispered to herself. "She'll be here any minute now, you can't cry."

And she was right because a few seconds later, there was a shy, hesitant knock at the door. Spencer jumped from the couch and took one final look at her house. It looked..decent. At least there wasn't any random papers on the floor, like her old room had been. She walked slowly to the door as another knock echoed throughout her ear, this time more confident. The journalist opened the door slowly to reveal the person that made her heart flutter, but also made her heart hurt.

"Hey," the former swimmer whispered. "I didn't think you would answer to be honest." Emily let out a dry laugh and Spencer remained silent, but opened the door enough for Emily to enter.

As Emily passed her, Spencer's eyes closed just enjoying the scent of vanilla that explored the air and it was the scent she hadn't smelled in a while. "Nice home." Emily said, trying to ease the awkward silence. The journalist only shrugged as she shut the front door and locked it. Spencer then made her way over to the couch and sat down.

Her eyes were suddenly interested in her hands as Emily was now standing above her, trying to get her to look up but she never did. Emily rolled her eyes and kneeled down, using her index finger to lift Spencer's chin. "Wanna know what I do for a living? I'm swim coach at Xavier University. I know it's not much but I want to be as close to the water as I can be because it's the only thing that keeps me going. It's the only thing that I know will never let me down."

Spencer pushed Emily's hand away, but now she wasn't scared. She let her eyes connect with Emily's and she let her mouth say, "What does that have to do with anything?" Spencer's eyebrows furrowed as she watched Emily's mouth twist into a small, soft smile.

"Nothing, I just wanted you to say something." The swimmer whispered, "You're still stubborn. Nothing has changed, has it?"

"Everything has changed." Spencer replied, her eyes now stone cold onto Emily's. "And it's all your fault." The brunette let out a dry laugh as she let her hand fall onto Emily's cheek. "You are so lucky that I'm in love with you because right now, I want to kill you." She felt tears brewing and she didn't even try to stop them. She let them fall freely and when she saw Emily try to wipe them away, she swiped her hand away. "No, don't wipe them away because I want you to see how fucked up this is.

Emily, it's fucked up because I forgive you. I forgive you and I would keep on forgiving you because you're the love of my life. I tried so hard to hate you and to forget about you, but I couldn't. Every time I tried, the kisses, the touches, everything would just come floating back in and wiping all my anger that I had for you away."

Tears continued to flow down Spencer's cheeks as she continued, "And you know what else is fucked up? You're my happy ending, but I'm not your happy ending. That's fucked up, Em. You and Alison are getting married god knows when and the two of you are going to have a family together, which was what I wanted for us until you messed it all up."

"I'm sorry, okay?" Emily's voice broke. "I'm so sorry, Spencer. I should have listened to you. I was young and stupid and heartbroken. But it's too late, the damage is done and I understand that. Spencer, I came to Louisiana forget about everything too. To get away from Rosewood just like you did. I haven't spoken to my parents in years just like you, I barely speak to Aria and Hanna anymore and-"

"Well at least your parents don't hate you, you just fell put of touch with them. At least you still talk to Hanna and Aria, even if it is every once in a while. I don't speak to them at all because they probably freaking hate me too."

"Why do you think everyone hates you, Spence? No one hates you. Not your parents, not Aria, not Hanna, not Melissa. You should have seen how broken she was about you going to jail."

"Then why did they all stop visiting?" Spencer yelled, and Emily stepped slightly away from the lanky brunette. "Why did they stop fucking visiting me? What happened?"

Emily took a deep breath before answering, "Because someone, they never told me who, told them to never speak to you again and if they did, they would make sure you spend the rest of your life in jail. Your family didn't want that. They wanted you home as soon as possible. If you would have read any of my letters, you would have known why. I was so worried about you."

Spencer scoffed. "Yeah right, if you were so worried about me, you could have-"

"How many fucking times do I have to tell you that I'm sorry, Spencer?" Emily snapped. "Can we please just forget about this?"

"I will never forget about it." Spencer scowled. "Let me show you something." She whispered, grabbing the edges of her shirt. She pulled her shirt upwards, enough for Emily to see the scars on her abdomen. Emily let out a gasp as she looked over Spencer's long gashes on her abdomen. "How can someone forget about this? This will always be here."

Emily said nothing as she let her fingers explore the journalist's wounds. She traced her fingers through each one, her eyes never leaving them. Spencer's breath caught in her throat at the feelings of Emily's soft fingers grazing her stomach. "I'm sorry..." Emily whispered, once again and Spencer shut her eyes. The lanky brunette then used her index finger to connect her eyes with Emily's.

"I told you already," Tears brimmed in her eyes. "No matter how much I hate you at the moment, you're already forgiven. Stop saying sorry."

Emily's hand fell onto Spencer's cheek as she leaned in slowly. "Let me kiss you, please." Emily pleaded. "I really want to kiss you right now, just let-"

The journalist pressed her lips onto Emily's quickly before pulling away. "I love you." She whispered. "I love you so much."

"Spencer, I love you too."

"Stop."

Emily whispered, "Stop what?"

"Stop saying that to me, you will never love me in that way." Spencer rolled her eyes, backing away from the brunette and heading towards the door. "And I don't want to ruin your marriage so I suggest you leave."

"What is wrong with you?" Emily snapped, her voice rising. "One minute, you're calm and understandable, and the next minute you're confusing and unpredictable. Tell me what I'm doing wrong."

"Nothing, I'm just trying to process everything. So leave? Please?" She opened the door wide enough for Emily to walk through and the swimmer did, before pausing half way through the door.

"Well um," Emily cleared her throat. "I'll see you around."

Spencer nodded and Emily walked out of the door, the lanky brunette closing it and letting her body glide down in. Sobs escaping her mouth freely and loudly. Little did she know, Emily was still standing on the other side of the door, listening to her sobbing. The broad brunette let tears fall from her eyes, listening to Spencer. She then pulled put her phone out of her pocket and began typing.

Spencer, listen. I'm sorry for everything I've put you through and I know you may not believe this, but I do love you in that way, and I'll prove it to you until you actually believe me. Alison and I do have a connection, but you and I have been in love with each other since junior year. I've known it since then, but I was convincing myself that you didn't feel the same way so I dated Paige. I dated her and it was horrible. That's why I did what I did, okay? She used to get really angry and it's like everything that she ever said to me meant nothing. She used to hit me and yell at me. Want to know why? Because of you, we fought every time over you. And me, you know me, I would never hurt anyone but that day, she made me really mad because she kept calling you all these bad names and talking shit about you. Butthe thing that really made me black out was when she told me that you would never love me. I convinced myself that what she said was true and I blacked out. I ran from her house to yours and you were telling me to calm down and...and I wouldn't listen. I don't know why I didn't listen to you. That's why we're in the situation we're in now. That's why you can't trust me anymore. But Spence, just remember all the good times we had. Just remember everything we've been through together. Everything I said to you about wanting to take you to senior prom was true, everything I said about wanting to be with you was true, and when I said I was wanted to marry you, that was true. And I ruined it. And I know I should have said this to your face, but I'm a coward. I'm in idiot also for letting you take the fall for everything. Just remember though, how much I love you. You're my once upon a time and my happy ending..and you always will be.

-E

Emily pressed the send button and hurried quickly to her car, never looking back. She drove off quickly with tears and her eyes and the echoing of Spencer's sobs in her ears. A few seconds later, Spencer's phone buzzed. She quickly opened the message and read over it. Her heart fluttered as she read over the message. Now, all she wanted to do was kiss Emily and tell her how much she loved her. She dialed the number and it rang..and rang and rang until it reached the voicemail. "Crap," Spencer whispered to herself.

PAST WILL BE ONE WHOLE CHAPTER EXPLAINING EVERYTHING EMILY MENTIONED IN HER MESSAGE TO SPENCER AND MORE. THERE WILL BE SOME PAILY, SOME SPEMILY, BUT MOSTLY FOCUSING ON PAILY. PLEASE DON'T HATE ME FOR THE NEXT CHAPTER GUYS, WHICH SHOULD BE COMING UP SOON BECAUSE HELLO! CHRISTMAS AND NEW YEARS BREAK! WHOOP! WHOOP! BY THE WAY, THIS STORY IS IN PRESENT TIME AS IN ALMOST CHRISTMAS. YAY! I WILL HAVE A CHRISTMAS CHAPTER BECAUSE I HAVE SOMETHING PLANNED FOR THAT AND IT WILL BE AFTER THE PAST CHAPTER. I HOPE I HAVE IT IN ON TIME FOR CHRISTMAS THOUGH. HAHA. PLEASE REVIEW. THE MORE REVIEWS, THE QUICKER THE UPDATES GUYS.