Author's Note: This is a follow up to the last chapter for those who wondered how it turned out. I hope you find it satisfying! Thank you so much for letting me know what you think of this series. Your feedback keeps me going!

Chapter 4: Date Night

Jane put Clarissa's dinner on her high chair tray with a flourish, drawing an answering grin from her. "My lady is served," he intoned, making her giggle.

"Where's yours?" she asked when he didn't sit down. Just past her second birthday, her verbal skills had taken a dramatic leap forward, and she mostly constructed sentences now.

"I'm eating later with Mommy. It's date night." Jane was practically giddy with anticipation, and he let it show. They hadn't had a date night since the twins were born, too busy and too tired even after they'd hired a nanny so they weren't outnumbered. But Teresa's maternity leave was ending, after she'd twice extended it, and Jane had suggested they have a night out before she got sucked back into an erratic work schedule. "Uncle Cho is coming over to help Laurel look after you and your brothers."

"Yay!" Clarissa loved her Uncle Cho with a passion that amused Jane, but also made him happy. His children would never lack loving adult guidance.

"Yes, yay. Now, eat your spaghetti. I'm going to see how Mommy is doing." Jane started out of the room, pausing only to remind her, "No throwing!"

It was a waste of breath, he knew, and he only had a couple of minutes before she'd start trying to unbuckle herself and get down. Fortunately, in the hallway he met Laurel, the nice young lady they'd hired to help out after extensive background checks and an interview by Cho at his most formidable. "Laurel, could you oversee Clarissa's dinner?"

"Sure." They both winced a little at a splat from the kitchen, and she grinned. "The boys are both bathed and put to bed."

"Great. Thanks." Jane headed up the stairs to check on Trevor and Connor. They were both awake but sleepy, yawning after their dinner and bath and content to lie in their cribs for once. He kissed them and went in search of his wife, feeling that everything was coming together nicely.

Teresa was standing in their closet, frowning. Uh oh. "You don't need to dress up," Jane remarked as he joined her. He laid a hand on her shoulder, feeling the tension there. "I don't have anything fancy planned."

She relaxed a little. "You don't?"

"No. I knew you didn't want one more thing to worry about." He kissed her briefly. "We'll improvise. Your favorite steak place, maybe, or takeout in the Airstream."

Her expression lightened, and he saw that he'd been right. She'd wanted to cancel but felt guilty doing so, knowing how much he'd been looking forward to this. He wondered if she assumed he wanted to make love tonight. It had been six months since the twins were born, and they'd managed a few times, but with three young children they always knew they could be interrupted. He longed to take his time with her again. But he was also determined to keep their sex life and Teresa's martyr complex as far apart as possible.

"Takeout in the Airstream sounds wonderful," she said. "Just the two of us. Maybe we can take a nap after."

Jane grinned. He loved being part of a big, busy family where a nap was considered a treat for the adults. "Perfect. So put on something comfortable and think about which drive through window you'd like to patronize."

"Let's go to your favorite taco truck," Teresa suggested.

Jane chuckled; he'd been thinking about that truck just yesterday. "Have I mentioned lately that I love you?"

"Not today that I recall," she smiled.

He pulled her into his arms and kissed her soundly until they heard Cho call out as he came in the door. "Better go say hi," Jane murmured against her neck.

"Mmm." Teresa lay her head against his shoulder. "Can't we just stay in here?"

Jane snickered at the image of Cho catching them making out in the closet. "My fantasies always featured a supply closet, not our master bedroom one."

"This is much roomier." Teresa grinned at him as she stepped back. "Go say hi and let me get dressed. I'll be quick."

Jane stole another kiss, then went out to greet his old friend. Cho had been a regular visitor ever since the twins were a few weeks old, when Jane and Teresa had been at the end of their rope. He'd not only found Laurel for them, but he'd also pitched in himself at least twice a week until things settled down. If not for him and Wylie, Jane wasn't sure their family would have come through intact.

From Clarissa's cries of excitement, Jane deduced that Cho was in the kitchen. Sure enough, he found Laurel scrubbing the wall while Cho tried to explain to Clarissa that her dinner was not a projectile. "Hi, Cho. Thanks for stopping by."

"No problem. We wrapped the case today so I have the night off. Thanks for pointing us in the right direction."

Jane shrugged. All he'd done was review the file and make a few obvious (to him) remarks. "You're welcome."

"You ever want to come back, just let me know."

"Not until they're all in school, at least," Jane replied. "We're not going far, so call or text if anything comes up."

Cho said, "I got this. We're the FBI."

Jane smirked at the old joke. "Striking fear into the hearts of bad guys and keeping little girls from launching spaghetti missiles."

"I get paid for the first one."

"You get paid for the second one, too. Containers are in the freezer." Jane was happy to supply home cooked meals for his bachelor buddies in return for babysitting.

"Thanks," Cho replied. "You guys have fun."

"You too." Jane leaned down to kiss Clarissa's cheek. "You be good for Uncle Cho, okay, lightning bug?"

"Okay Daddy." Clarissa put a handful of spaghetti in her mouth and smiled as if butter wouldn't melt in it. Jane recognized that look from his mirror, though it was disconcerting to see it on a face with so many of Teresa's features.

Cho obviously recognized that look too. "Good. Because only good little girls get stories."

Teresa joined them with a smile. "And good uncles are careful about the stories they tell."

"Of course," Cho replied.

"Because the last story you told her resulted in nonstop begging for a p-o-n-y," Teresa remarked.

Cho shrugged. "Not like you don't have room."

"That's what I said," Jane said.

Teresa narrowed her eyes at him. "Somebody wants to spend date night at the coliseum."

He held up his hands in surrender. "Only if they've moved the opera there. Ready to go, my dear?"

Teresa bent to kiss Clarissa's cheek. "Good night, sweetheart. Be good, okay?"

"Okay," Clarissa agreed, occupied by trying to grab more noodles than she could hold.

Jane held out his hand to Teresa, who took it but turned to Cho. "Thanks, Cho. See you in a few hours. You know where everything is, and you can text us if you need anything."

Jane began towing her out of the room as Cho waved a hand. "Get out of here. We'll be fine."

mmm

It was a beautiful night, and they ended up eating in the park near the taco truck, then taking a stroll arm in arm. Jane was content to wander under the stars with his love, but he could tell Teresa was wanting to move the evening along. That was interesting. Obviously she wanted to talk, but not in public.

"Shall we pick up some ice cream?" he suggested.

"I'm never going to lose the rest of the baby weight eating ice cream," she pointed out, tugging at her blouse in annoyance.

She'd gotten back in fighting form after Clarissa, but she was having a tougher time now. Jane liked her all soft and curvy, but he knew his preferences weren't what counted. "We could work it off after."

Teresa looked at him with an expression he couldn't quite pin down. Then she said, "I'll split a cone with you. How's that?"

"I'll take it." He steered her toward the nearest ice cream parlor.

They split a chocolate ice cream cone as they walked to the car, then listened to jazz on the radio as they drove back to the cabin. The Airstream was parked a little ways away, mostly unused as they waited for the twins to be old enough to take on a family vacation. As Jane opened the door for Teresa, he had a flash of deja vu, recalling the days when they'd lived here, from their first weeks together to their first months as newlyweds. "Home sweet home," he joked.

Teresa ran her hand along the table. "Yeah," she said softly. "Some good memories here. Not as many as the cabin, but they're special."

"Yes, they are." He locked the door behind them and leaned down for a kiss. "Have a seat, my dear, and tell me what's on your mind."

She gave him a look, but she'd finally lost the habit of asking him how he knew things. Or maybe she was just working up the nerve to broach whatever unpleasant subject she wanted to discuss. He wracked his brain but couldn't come up with a likely candidate. He knew they were in agreement that they didn't want a bigger family, and they'd been careful so he didn't think she was pregnant. She liked her management job and didn't pine for field work, and she knew he didn't care if she loaned her brothers money.

"I, uh, talked to my doctor yesterday," she began after they were seated at the table, and his heart nearly stopped. She wasn't sick, was she? "I'm fine, Patrick," she said quickly, reaching for his hand. "Sorry. I didn't mean to worry you. I'm fine. I promise."

"Okay," he croaked.

"I wanted to talk to her about how to prevent any more pregnancies." She tried to lighten the atmosphere with a nervous smile. "I don't think we'd survive four kids, much less five."

Considering how hard carrying and giving birth to the twins had been on her, he had to agree. "You might be right. Though I like to think we can handle anything."

She shook her head. "I didn't like who I was a few months ago. I hated the way you tiptoed around me like I was fragile. And I hated knowing that I was."

"The medicine helped, though. And I loved you through all of it, Teresa. Every minute."

"I know. But it was hard for me to remember I loved you, and I know you saw that. I know it scared you. And I never want us to be in a place like that again."

Scared was a small word for his bone deep terror when he'd realized how distant she'd become, but he didn't want to dwell on it. "Me either."

"So we talked through some options. I don't want to take more time off for surgery, and the other things all have a range of possible side effects, some minor and some not."

"We can just keep using condoms," he suggested. She wasn't likely to be fertile for more than another ten years, probably less.

"They're not foolproof. And I really want foolproof."

"Is that why you haven't been interested much?" He wanted to kick himself for not realizing she dreaded an accident.

"Partly. But anyway, what I wanted to ask you was..." She took a breath.

"You want me to have a vasectomy." He blurted it out as soon as he realized it.

"Don't say no right away," she said quickly. "Just think about it. I know it's not totally without risks, and I know how you feel about doctors."

Jane winced a little at the thought of letting someone use a sharp blade near his most sensitive parts. But he had to admit Teresa had suffered quite a bit of handling of hers while giving birth to their children. She wasn't being unreasonable; it just felt that way right now. "Okay, I'll think about it."

"You can always freeze some sperm if you want to," she offered.

"Why would I want to?" He frowned. They'd agreed they were done having kids.

"Just in case. So you don't feel like you're, I don't know, losing any possibilities."

"You mean when I have my belated midlife crisis and run off with a twenty year old?" He couldn't keep the sarcasm out of his voice.

"No. I know you're not going to do that," Teresa assured him. "But if something happened to me, or God forbid one of the kids—"

"I'd want a replacement? No!" Jane took a deep breath to calm down. "No."

"Okay. Sorry." Teresa squeezed his hand.

"It doesn't work like that," he said, swallowing against the lump in his throat.

"I know. I didn't mean to say it did. I just don't want you to feel like you're giving something up if you do this."

"Because you're the only one allowed to make sacrifices for this family?"

Teresa sighed, sitting back. "Well, that's one date night ruined."

"What did you expect?" he snapped.

"This, pretty much," she admitted. "I just thought we should talk about it without the kids around."

Jane rubbed at his face. "Yeah."

"Do you want to go for a walk or something?"

He had to smile a little at how well she knew him. "Yeah. I won't be long."

"Take your time. I've been looking forward to a nap," she smiled as they got up. Then she gave him a kiss. "Hey. It's okay if you say no. I'll figure something else out."

"We'll figure something else out," he corrected her. "We share responsibility for this."

Her gentle smile warmed him. "I know. I love you."

"I love you too. I won't be long."

mmm

A brisk walk in the woods always helped Jane think more clearly, and he hadn't gone far before he started to wonder how big an idiot he was for spending his rare kid-free time apart from his wife. He took a few deep breaths of the evening air, chilly with the oncoming winter, and made his way back to the Airstream.

As much as the idea of surgery made him want to run for the hills, he owed it to Teresa to thoroughly consider it. He at least needed to consult a doctor and do some research so she'd know he'd taken her request seriously, no matter his answer.

He hadn't realized how badly her experience had scared her, and he didn't want her worrying about another baby every time they made love. Some kind of permanent solution was called for, he knew. And hadn't he always said he'd do anything for her? He'd need a better reason than fear to deny her request, which she hadn't made lightly, he knew.

It was getting late, and their date night was drawing to a close. They weren't going to settle this tonight, so he wanted to put it aside and enjoy his precious alone time with Teresa. He grinned with anticipation as he opened the door of the Airstream.

Teresa was curled up on the bed, sound asleep. He smiled down at her, reminded of the early days of their relationship when he'd stay awake just to look at her, unable to believe she'd chosen him. Sometimes he was afraid he'd wake up and find it had all been a dream.

He'd let her sleep a while. Cho was a big boy; he could stay up past midnight without turning into a pumpkin. Meanwhile, Jane could get his thoughts organized. He tapped his lips with a finger, then turned to one of the cupboards. Sure enough, he'd left some paper and a pen here, along with his emergency tea stash.

My dearest Teresa,

Did I ever tell you I used to watch you sleep? There's not much chance to do it these days, but looking at you now I remember why I love it. You're so peaceful when you sleep, and if I whisper to you or touch your cheek, you'll smile in contentment. It's still marvelous to me that I can make you happy.

For so long I felt as if I blighted everyone I touched. I'm thankful that you and our friends managed to survive despite my bringing your world crashing down around you. That you're all thriving today brings me great joy. That you chose me to share your life and father your children is nothing short of astonishing. Sometimes the thought occurs to me that I might be locked up in a padded room somewhere dreaming all this.

Which is why I'm grateful that you still surprise me. I'm pretty sure even my twisted mind on its most self-loathing day wouldn't come up with you asking me nicely to consider surgical sterilization. If I were making this up, you'd probably just castrate me in my sleep. No doubt it would be well deserved.

I know you hate it when I say I'm in your debt, but I am. I demanded so much of you over the years, and you asked me for so little. So rest assured that I am giving your request serious and sustained consideration, as it deserves. I never want our marriage to become lopsided as our professional relationship was, with me doing all the taking and you doing all the giving. There's nothing I want to withhold from you, ever. Even this.

But you know me, better than anyone. You know my fears and my tendency to avoid rather than confront them. Somewhere in your mind I'm sure you're worried I'll pretend to agree and then lie to you about having surgery, probably orchestrating an elaborate scheme to deceive you. It's not an unreasonable concern on your part, I'm ashamed to confess. But I promise you I won't. I try not to lie to you anymore, you know. And never about something so important.

But I must ask of you something in return. If this turns out to be the best option for us, I'll need your help. I'll need you to help me talk to the doctor and make sure I don't give him a strong unconscious desire to sever an important vein while he's cutting. We both know I inspire that kind of reaction sometimes. And fear makes me very hard to deal with.

I'll also need you to hold my hand and understand, as I know you do, how frightened I am under the arrogant bravado.

I never told you this, but from our very first time I have always considered making love with you to be an act of creation. Each and every time I'm inside you, you create another piece of me, rebuilding me from the ruins of the broken man I was. Even when making a baby hasn't been a possibility, the act of joining our bodies made my identity more solid, first as a lover, then a husband, and then a husband and father.

The man I am today could never have existed without you, Teresa. If we go all the way back to our first meeting, I think that I'm more your making than anyone else's. You are Pygmalion and I am your flawed but faithful Galatea.

Or perhaps you'd prefer me to put it this way: I made myself a better man trying to be worthy of your friendship and then your love. And my first impulse will always be to give you what you want, or at least what I think you want. So since you've made a direct and specific request, I will need a very good reason to deny you. If I don't find one, I will do my utmost to face my fear and do as you ask. You've done as much for me, over and over, from lying to your superiors to pretending to be a psychic to facing childbirth. I'll try to take courage from your example.

Just stay with me through it all, please. I can face anything with you beside me. You were my guardian angel long before you were my wife, fierce and radiant as if you stepped from a stained glass window. 'Be not afraid,' the angels always had to say first in the Bible, because they were wondrous and terrifying to mortals. You are wondrous and awesome, in the old sense of the word as well as the new. And I will go through anything for you as long as your hand is outstretched to pull me to you on the other side of it.

But for now I will lie down beside you and hold you while you sleep, like I did so often when it was a new and magical thing to watch the moonlight paint your breast alabaster or feel your fingers flex against mine as you dreamed. Even now when all of that is far from new, it is still magical, and I am enchanted by it. Our lives may seem normal, our days filled with chores and dirty diapers, but our story is still a fairy tale, even after the evil sorcerer has been vanquished and the obstacles to our love overcome. You are my heroine. I will always do my best to be your hero.

All my love,

Patrick

Jane folded the letter and toed off his shoes, carefully lying down beside Teresa. As she sensed his heat, she rolled toward him and slid her arm around his waist, humming a little. He kissed her forehead and whispered, "Go back to sleep, love. We have time."

She yawned, then murmured, "Don't you want to have sex?"

"Always." He nibbled her earlobe.

Teresa chuckled sleepily. "You wrote me another letter, didn't you?"

"What makes you say that?"

"Too long to be a grocery list. You okay?"

"Yeah. I'm good." He tucked his face against her neck. "Really good."

"Good." She kissed his hair, then rolled him onto his back and climbed over him.

"Where're you going?" he asked plaintively, trying in vain to stop her.

"To get my letter. I want to read it." She picked it up and then climbed back into bed, turning on the overhead light.

Jane grumbled, "It'll still be there in the morning, you know."

Teresa unfolded the letter. "Cheer up. If it's anything like your other ones, it'll save you some foreplay."

He huffed out a chuckle, then put his arms around her waist and pulled himself into her lap while she read, pressing tickling little kisses against her ribs through her blouse. She worked the fingers of one hand into his hair, stroking and scratching until he wanted to purr like a big cat. This was far more like the date night he'd envisioned, he thought.

At last, Teresa carefully folded the letter and tucked it under her pillow. Then she began unbuttoning her blouse. "Okay hero," she said softly. "Better get moving. We turn back into parents at midnight."

"I think our fairy godmother will forgive us if we're late," Jane murmured, sitting up to kiss her.

Teresa snorted into his kiss as she imagined Cho in a gown holding a magic wand, just as he'd intended. They were momentarily distracted from undressing each other by a fit of giggles, which in its way was almost as good as sex, Jane thought.

"Fairy tale, huh?" she said skeptically.

"Absolutely. We're living happily ever after, aren't we?" He certainly was.

She smiled, the big glowing one he loved. "Yeah. We are."