"Oh my god! Deidara give me that fucking flat iron before I kick your ass. Look I have frizz because of the humidity…GIVE IT TO ME NOW DUMB ASS!"
"Would you please relax, yeah? We have plenty of time until we have to get out of this dressing room. I'm almost done I only have three more….AAAAAGGGGHHHHHHHH! I WASN'T DONE WITH THAT YEAH!" Deidara was upset that the flat iron had been stripped from his hands.
"Oh my god! Look at the sign I made to hold up tonight if they win!" Marisol said showing the sign to Lola.
"Um…Marisol? That sign has your phone number on it." Lola said completely puzzled.
"Yeah, I was going to put my bra size but I thought this was better…that way Deidara can call me after the game show!" Marisol squealed. Lola didn't say anything for a moment.
"Marisol…..haven't' you and Deidara been together for like 7 months? Doesn't he already know both of those things?" she asked. Marisol thought for a moment.
"Oooooooooh. You know, I never thought of that but you are so right." Lola shook her head in disbelief. However, Dana's sign read 'Itachi, we're supposed to pick up margarita mix and the latest issue of Vogue on our way back home'. Lola assumed that those two had gotten together to make those signs…
"Hey this thing starts in 5 minutes and Deidara and Itachi STILL aren't ready. We really need to make those two get a grip. From now on each of them have 20 minutes to get ready….not an hour." Kisame said.
"Oh….My……God! You are so mean to me Itachi, yeah! First you totally fuck up my hair because you rip the flat iron out of my hand. Now, you totally STEAL my orange Dolce and Gabbana shirt, yeah! I was so going to wear that, yeah!"
"Deidara, wear something else look how good I look in this." Itachi said.
"But I was going to wear THAT because Marisol so got that half price at Saks, yeah!" Deidara argued.
"Seriously half price?" Itachi said surprised.
"I know can you believe it, yeah!"
"That reminds me, we so have to use those 150 dollar Saks gift cards 'The Leader' gave us for Christmas. I mean they expire in one year." Deidara shook his head in agreement.
"We totally need to go this weekend, yeah. Oh my god! We could look for new swimwear, yeah!" This lovely conversation was interrupted by Zetsu.
"Oh my god! Would you two get the hell out here! The show is going to start and you two have done nothing but bitch for the last 5 minutes!" Zetsu said angrily.
And so, everyone was ready for the game show to begin and they took their places on the stage before the tacky theme song music began to play. The audience clapped and a hidden announcer made the opening comments.
"Ladies and gentleman. Please join me in welcoming our host on today's Quiz Show….Tsunade of the Hidden Leaf Village! She's everyone's favorite blonde who loves sake and gambling! Rumor has it that she and Orochimaru are friends! Ladies and gentleman….Tsunade!" The audience clapped again.
"Thank you, thank you." Tsunade took a sip of sake. "I would like to introduce to you tonight the teams that will be playing for the prize of a year supply of microwave popcorn. First, team Orochimaru! Featuring the snake Sannin himself Orochimaru! The Uchiha prodigy Sasuke, the obese henchman Jiroubou, the two-headed freak Sakon, Spderman Kidoumaru, the man who gives boner a whole new meaning Kimimaro, the girl power of the group Tayuya, and Orochimaru's bitch Kabuto!"
"Hey!" Kabuto yelled after that last part.
"And playing for team Akatsuki, the sexier of the Uchihas, Itachi!, More brains than braun, Sasori! The man with gills and a salt-water fetish Kisame! He has the ability to photosynthesize, Zetsu! The blonde who has more fun Deidara! He's got money in the bank Kakuzu! Religious and proud of it, Hidan! And he's the ultimate cheerleader, Tobi!"
In the audience, Dana and Marisol screamd their heads off while Lola clapped politely.
"Now for some official rules. Each team picks a player who will start the round and then determines a playing order. The playing order must be maintained unless a lightning round occurs in which case you may choose your unknown wild card player or any other player for your team. The first team to win 30 points is the winner!" Tsunade was ready to begin the game show. "Teams, please select your first player." Both teams started whispering. Akatsuki watched to see who Orochimaru would choose to play first for their team. Kidoumaru was at the podium with the buzzer so it was obvious that Akatsuki's choice was Zetsu.
"Okay players, Kidoumaru would you tell us a bit about yourself?" Tsunade asked.
"Well, I think Hyuuga Neji is a bitch and my favorite food cheese."
"Um…thanks. Zetsu?" Tsunade redirected the attention.
"I'm Zetsu, I have no social life and few friends."
"Alright, let's get started there are 7 categories: Religion, undersea life, art, plants of the world, Wall Street, Pop Culture and grab bag. Kidoumaru, you are first to choose the category." Tsunade said.
"I would like plants of the world, Tsunade!" Tsunade took the fist question card. Zetsu got ready to hit the buzzer.
"This plant is commonly found in the desert. It is characterized by a thorny exterior and water can be found in it's center." Zetsu was too slow.
"A cactus!" Kidoumaru shouted as he slammed the buzzer.
"Damn it!" Zetsu was not pleased.
"That is correct! One point for team Orochimaru!" Naturally, Orochimaru's team went wild for the first point. "You next players please!" Tsunade announced. Akatsuki sent Itachi up to the podium.
"DON'T WORRY BABY YOU'LL GET THE ANSWER, YEAH!" Dana yelled. Team Orochimaru sent Sasuke up.
"Okay, Itachi would you care to tell us some things about yourself?" Tsunade had made a mistake giving Itachi the stage. He smiled and flipped onyx hair around his shoulders.
"Well, as you can see….I'm gorgeous. My girlfriend is amazingly hot and if you piss me off…..I can totally fuck with your mind if you look into my eyes."
"O……k……..Sasuke."
"Um…..Itachi is my brother…..um….Orochimaru is a good teacher."
"God, like that's really an introduction!" Itachi yelled at Sasuke.
"Okay, okay Itachi would you please choose a category." Tsunade said ending things before they escalated into a sibling argument.
"I want pop culture, Tsunade." Itachi said.
"Okay, this French fashion designer made her debut in the late 1960's. Her perfume today is one of the most sought after perfumes for women." Itachi slammed the buzzer.
"COCO CHANEL!" he yelled. Sasuke rolled his eyes. "Take that BITCH OF A BROTHER!" of course Itachi had to follow that comment up with a finger snap. Sasori rolled his eyes.
"See, why is he not gay?" Sasori whispered to Hidan.
"Alright, now the score is 1 to 1, teams please select your next contestants." Tsunade moved the game along. "Next players!" Tobi and Jiroubou stepped up to the podium.
"Hi I'm Tobi! I LOVE Akatsuki and it's my favorite group EVER! Deidara is the coolest partner/friend EVER! And…"
"Okay Tobi thanks." Tsunade cut the overly excited Tobi off.
"I'm Jiroubou and I'M TAKING THE SUBWAY CHALLENGE!" Orochimaru's team cheered for him. "I've already lost 6 pounds."
"Jiroubou would you please select a category."
"I'll take undersea life Tsunade!" Jiroubou shouted.
"Alright, this deep sea predator has a beak and catches it's prey with tentacles." There was a long pause. Jiroubou slammed his hand on the buzzer.
"Squid!"
"That's right and with a score of team Orochimaru 2 Akatsuki 1 we'll continue play after these brief messages!"