Daryl headed out early the next morning to hunt. He couldn't sleep anyway, so he figured he would make himself useful.
He had this ability to completely shut off his mind when he was hunting. Daryl had used hunting and tracking as an escape mechanism his entire life. When things got rough he would slip into the woods and just forget. But for the first time ever it didn't work. When he missed the same rabbit for the third time Daryl gave up and headed back to camp.
He had hit two rabbits already - those would have to do. He actually wasn't hungry at all but since Carol often helped with the cooking it would be a good reason to get to talk to her, even if it was only for a second.
When he got back he went to work skinning and gutting the rabbits. Once they were ready he headed towards the fire where they did most of their cooking. Carol was there with Jacqui, preparing something in a big pot.
"Hey," he said to both of them. "Got a couple rabbits for supper."
"Ohhhh," Jacqui squealed, "you are a life saver!" He handed her the rabbits and Jacqui passed them on to Carol. "You're better at cooking these, I always burn them," she laughed.
Daryl noticed that Carol was avoiding eye contact. She had never done that before. "Thanks," she said to him, without even looking in his direction. She immediately went to work preparing the rabbits to cook.
His mind was racing as he walked away. He wondered if she was mad at him? Or if she was just being cautious with Jacqui there. He couldn't wait until night time to find out what the hell was going on.
Daryl went into his trailer and attempted to sleep. With very little sleep the night before and the expectation of being up talking with Carol a few hours later he figured he really needed a nap.
It was dark when Daryl woke. He had missed supper, but he didn't care. He just wanted everyone to go to bed so he could finally talk to Carol.
He decided to go to the fire. Only because he wanted to see her and couldn't wait any longer. Carol sat with Sophia in front of her leaning back against her legs. Daryl took a seat alone, far enough away that he could watch them without others noticing.
Sophia was adorable. He could see a lot of Carol in her features but even more so in her mannerisms. The way she held herself and the way her shoulders shook when she laughed were exactly like her mother.
Carol looked tired but not any less beautiful, her face lit by the flicker of the flames. The asshole sat off to her left smoking a cigarette.
Daryl listened to the chatter and stories but didn't say a word. When people started to disperse Daryl got up and headed back to his trailer.
A while later, about the time Carol would usually meet him he headed back to the fire pit to wait. He waited, and waited, and soon realized she wasn't coming.
As he walked slowly back to his campsite he felt empty. He felt like he did as a kid all the times that Santa never showed up at Christmas. He always assumed it was because he had been a bad boy, and perhaps this was the same thing. Daryl knew he had hurt her feelings the night before but he was still so sure she would have come.
He climbed defeated into bed and attempted again to sleep. At some point he drifted off but the sun was already rising outside. The buzz of the camp woke him late in the morning.
Daryl rose with determination to talk to her. He would find a way. He sat outside and worked on the wood carving he had started. About an hour later he saw his chance. Daryl jumped up and grabbed his crossbow.
He watched as Ed made his way towards the makeshift bathrooms they had set up on the edge of the camp. As soon as he was inside Daryl made a beeline for Carol. She didn't see him coming and jumped at the sound of his voice. "When he gets back tell him you're going to look for berries in the woods. I'll be waiting."
He didn't give her a chance to reply, Daryl was confident she could figure out the right thing to tell Ed so she could meet him. He slipped into the woods, not far from where Carol's tent was set up and waited.
Daryl could hear their conversation when Ed returned. "Hey, I'm just gonna go into the woods right there and see if I can find us some berries."
"Whatever. But if you find anything you fucking bring them here for us. No sharing with all your little girlfriends."
"Okay," Carol replied sweetly.
The moment she steeped into the trees Daryl grabbed her hand and led her deeper into the Forest. She followed willingly and he was relieved.
When he felt they were deep enough that no one could hear them he stopped, released her hand and turned to face her. "You didn't come last night," he stated.
Carol looked at him a moment before speaking, finally meeting his eyes again. "I thought you were mad at me. I didn't think you would want to see me after what I did," she looked away shyly. He had never seen her shy before, with him, and Daryl realized that he had wounded her deeply.
He sighed, "I'm not mad and I didn't say I didn't want to talk to you anymore." Carol was avoiding eye contact again so Daryl reached out and gently touched her chin, moving her eyes in the direction of his own. "I only asked you to not make me want what I couldn't have. But..." Daryl paused to search for the right words. "But it was too late," he said. "I already wanted you."
It only took a moment for his words to sink in and when they did Daryl had no idea which one of them closed the gap between them. He wrapped his arms around her body and crushed Carol tightly against him. When their lips met there was an explosion of built up lust and sexual frustration. This kiss was not soft and tender like the first, it was fuelled with a desire and longing they had both kept buried inside them for too long. As much as it was about them as a couple it was also about them as individuals. Daryl had never given this part of him to anyone and Carol had given hers to a man who had never deserved or appreciated it.
Daryl had no clue how long they had been kissing when Carol finally pulled away. "We shouldn't be doing this," she said, rather unconvincingly. It was actually more of a question than a statement.
"Not now," was the only logical answer Daryl could get out. "But will you come tonight? I, uh, I have something for you," he said timidly. It wasn't anything exciting and Daryl knew there was a chance she wouldn't even want it, but he was hoping, if nothing else, curiosity would bring her to him.
Carol nodded and smiled at him. The damn smile did its usual thing to his heart. "I'll walk you back closer to the edge, then you get the hell out of the woods." He took her hand again and started to walk. "Your big dumb husband never should have let you go off into the woods alone." Daryl looked over at her and grinned. "Lucky for me he's an idiot." When they were close enough he could watch her until she was safely back at the camp he released her hand. "Tonight," he whispered.
Carol didn't answer him, she just gave him a flirty grin and walked away. Daryl didn't know how many more of her smiles his heart could take.
1-1-1-1-1
Carol was sure that at some point time had stopped. It was the longest afternoon of her life. She took a short nap to kill some time but it was very brief. She hadn't slept well the night before. Three times she had climbed out of bed to go meet Daryl, but changed her mind.
She had to fight back tears every time she caught a glimpse of him the next day. She knew if she met his eyes she was done.
But now, after their meeting in the woods, everything was different. The feeling of dread and the sense of loss had lifted. She was happy and excited to see him again. They only missed one night of talking but it felt more like a week.
Sophia came to her with a deck of cards and they played Go Fish until Carl found her. Shane was taking him to the water to catch frogs and he wanted Sophia to go too.
"Can I mama?" Sophia asked, her voice filled with excitement.
Sophia was a great swimmer and Carol knew Shane would watch them both carefully. He was a bit of a hot head but he still had the responsibility of a cop and Carol knew he adored Carl. "Sure baby, but make sure you're both back in time for dinner."
Shane walked up as she was responding. "I'll be sure they are back, hopefully with some frogs legs to add to the menu!"
Carl and Sophia both groaned in disgust and Carol laughed. Sophia hugged her and they left.
Ed was laying in the tent being anti social as usual. Carol had no idea how someone could spend most of their day lying around and still sleep like a log at night. Though she was thankful that Ed was a sound sleeper.
When bed time finally rolled around Sophia was exhausted. She was asleep before Carol even kissed her goodnight. She planted a soft kiss on her forehead and smiled. If there was anything she could be thankful to Ed for it was their daughter.
Carol climbed silently into bed but before she was even fully under the covers Ed was reaching for her. She knew it was inevitable. They hadn't had sex in a while. But she tried to put it off anyway. "Please, not tonight, I'm tired," Carol tried.
"Shut the fuck up," Ed said, tugging down her pants and underwear.
"Ed please, Sophia..." she tried again.
"I don't give a shit," he hissed in anger. Carol knew if she pushed any harder he would hit her so she gave up. She let him do what he wanted, closing her eyes and praying it would be over soon. Sometimes she just tried to enjoy it, but it never worked. It always left her feeling violated and dirty.
Carol felt tears stinging her eyes by the time he was done. Luckily her back was to him, and it was dark. Ed hated it when she cried and he had hit her several times in the past for no other reason than simply because she was crying.
As usual he was snoring less than a minute after he was through with her. This time Carol didn't wait, as soon as he was asleep she jumped up and took off. She grabbed a towel on her way out and ran as fast as she could to the lake.
Carol knew it was dangerous to be even a few feet from the camp, alone, especially at night, but she had to wash herself. She felt disgusting and there was no way she could meet Daryl until she washed the memories of Ed off her.
The moon was bright and full giving her enough light to see what she was doing. Carol stripped and plunged into the cold water. It was freezing, but it was clean and that was far more important to her. She took a deep breath and ducked under the water. It took her breath away and she gasped when she resurfaced.
Carol scrubbed herself with her hands until she started to feel clean again. By the time she stepped out of the water she was shivering. She dried off and dressed quickly. On her way past her tent she put the towel on the line.
Daryl was waiting. She was still shivering when she approached and he looked concerned. "What's wrong? Why are you so cold?" He didn't wait for a reply, Daryl simply led her to his trailer and sat her down with a warm blanket around her. "Is your hair wet?" he asked. Carol nodded. "Why?" Daryl asked, waiting for her answer with a look of confusion.
Carol decided to just be honest but as the words came out her emotions followed. "Ed, he wanted to... I had to." The last part came out as a sob. She didn't want to come across as pathetic but she needed Daryl to know it wasn't something she had wanted. "I just felt dirty. I'm so sorry."
Daryl pulled her into a hug without speaking. She could feel his heart pounding and his body was stiff. He was trying to comfort her, but he was angry. "You have nothing to be sorry for," Daryl said. "But that fucking bastard does... I'm going to kill him."
Carol pulled back immediately. "Don't," she pleaded. "I know you're mad. I get it," she fixed her eyes on his. "I need to be able to talk to you about stuff. I need to tell someone and I know I'm being unfair, maybe even cruel, but I want that person to be you."
Daryl took a deep breath. "I'll try. No promises. That's all I can tell you."
Carol had no choice but to accept it so she nodded and they both relaxed. She decided it was time to change the subject, "you said you have something for me?"
Daryl smiled but followed it up with a blush. "It's not much, and if you don't want it it's ok." He stood up and fished something out of his pocket. "I've had this since I was a kid, carried it around for years. It can be for you or you can give it to Sophia if you want." He placed a tiny white rabbit's foot in her hand. "I think it's just from one of those stupid machines at K-Mart but it was the only thing I got one Christmas and I thought it was the coolest thing in the world." Carol smiled as he told his story. "It's supposed to be lucky," he shrugged. "I've survived this long."
Carol turned it over in her hand. The fur was smooth and it was warm from being in his pocket. Ed never gave her gifts. The only gifts she ever got were little drawings and crafts from Sophia. She was truly touched especially since it obviously meant so much to him. "Thank you," she gave him her brightest smile. "I love it."
Carol clutched the rabbit foot in her hand, the entire time they talked. "You look exhausted," she said, after a while.
"I haven't slept well in days. Even worse than usual," Daryl said, trying unsuccessfully to hide a yawn.
Carol yawned too and stood up, pushing her gift safely into her pocket. "Get in bed," she said. When Daryl didn't move she rolled her eyes, "just trust me. I have to go soon but I want to try something." Daryl had a shocked look on his face and she laughed, "don't get excited, it's not what you think."
Daryl got in bed and she climbed in beside him. She was enjoying the fact that he had no idea what was coming. She settled comfortably beside him. "Now give me your hand," Carol said. "This has always worked for Sophia to calm her down after a bad dream. Puts her right back to sleep." She gently started to rub his hand, drawing tiny circles in his palm. Daryl yawned again. Just like Sophia within a few minutes Daryl was asleep. Carol gently placed his hand across his chest. She couldn't help but watch him for a few minutes.
The last thing Carol remembered was thinking she really should get up and leave. The next thing she knew she woke to a loud banging on the door.
Both her and Daryl sat bolt upright and looked at each other. "Oh fuck," Daryl whispered.
They heard Dale's voice, "Daryl, wake up, we need your tracking skills, Carol is missing."