Koutetsu: What's crackin' guys and welcome to another-damn it
TAKE TWO
Koutetsu: Heeeello everybody, my name's Markiplier and welcome back to Switch Shock. Last time we-fuck!
TAKE THREE
Koutetsu: Hey friends, it's Akidearest-god fucking dammit!
TAKE FOUR
Koutetsu: Hey everybody it's Misty/Chronexia and-ARE YOU SHITTING ME?!
TAKE 153
Koutetsu: -yes! Yes! Finally!
Souta: *Runs over and gives Koutetsu a bro hug*
Koutetsu: We finally-huh?
Souta: Um...does the red light mean it's recording?
*Koutetsu and Souta glance at each other before looking comically sad*
Koutetsu: *Holds up finger guns, pretending to shoot them* BANG BANG! What's hapenin' ya'll? Koutetsu here with-FINALLY! I GOT IT RIGHT! *Ahem* Anyway, hey guys, i wanted to add a few quick notes. I apologize for the scene in the last chapter concerning Souta in Nep's room checking his body…*Cough* He's sixteen, cut him some slack. And finally, i want to apologize for taking so long to get this out, but, i have a life, so, yeah...plus, procrastination.
Souta: Hey, did we return the book to-
Blanc: *In HDD form* KOUTETSU! SOUTA! YOU BASTARDS ARE DEAD!
Koutetsu: SHIT! *Runs*
Souta: *On Koutetsu's shoulders* Faster, dude!
Blanc: *Charges* RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
*Technical errors. Please hold*
Chapter 4: Backtrack
"Where is it!? Where is it!?" I yelled, frantically looking around. IF chuckled lightly as she and Compa followed me into the cave i was in. "It's there. The monsters have it." I brought out my sword, slayed my foes with gusto, and frantically searched their corpses. "Hey! They don't have any pudding on them!" Compa giggled at my reaction. "That's because we tricked you Nep-Nep!" Cue the large sweatdrop and the crushing feeling of disappointment. "How am i supposed to trust you two?" IF shrugged. "As long as we get you to do your work, it's a win for us." She receded back a little bit in fear, though, when she saw the burning fire in my eyes. "THAT'S TWICE IN A ROW, YOU NEPPING JERK!" I yelled, running at them with my sword drawn. IF turned 180 degrees and sped off, with me right on her heels. "Hey! GUYS!" Compa yelled out to us, but no avail. She trudged behind us, being quiet salty about being left behind.
Y'know, living as someone else is great and all, but it wasn't until we went back to the Basilicom that i had realized i needed to figure out how i got in this whole situation. 'Quite embarrassing that i hadn't thought of that sooner…well, i do have Neptune's brain, after all, so i guess my thought process is like hers to a point...wait, where's the science in that!?' (A/N: I can feel Neptune's glare burning holes into the back of my neck…) Asking Nepgear or Histoire or anyone else is out of the question, they wouldn't believe me. Nope, i was on my own for this one.
I sat in Neptune's room, doing something very unlike her. Thinking. I went through various poses as i thought, being upside down on the bed, sitting in the middle of the room crossed-legged, hanging from the ceiling like a ninja, standing on my head...you get the point. I couldn't remember what happened that night, however, let alone finding the reason why it happened. I did remember my first and favorite anime, and put on its opening. Music helps me think more deeply than usual, as it does for many people "...unleash my fist, hero…" i sang softly as i racked my brain and all of its memories. It all started to come back slowly. 'It began when i was playing Neptunia late at night, and there was a storm then, due to that Typhoon back in Japan…' That's when a theory struck me. Hyperdimension Neptunia was made in Japan, and Gamindustri could be thought of as a cyber Japan, or at least four nations of it. What if a dimensional phenomena that isn't much of a phenomena in Gamindustri affected the real world, creating that Typhoon? 'It all links back to the game…but that still leaves the question of why Neptune, and not Vert or someone else? Because Vert seems like the most logical answer...unless she was playing games overnight as well!' And that does sound like something Neptune would do too. With that squared away, the only problem left was how i'd get back into my own body.
"Neptune!" Ah, i should've known that Histoire would eventually find me. She zipped around the doorway, floating in at a remarkable pace, and nearly rammed into my face. "What's up, miss pisty?" I asked her, throwing in a slight grin. "You know very well "what's up". You-!" She was cut off by me placing my finger on her small, but annoying mouth. "-need to do your Goddess duties, yadda yadda yadda…" Histoire visibly reddened in anger. "Mmffmffmammmmf!" Her words came out as a muffled lecture, which didn't make my ears bleed, thankfully. "Yeah, if you're done talking my ears off-YEOWCH!" The reason i didn't get to finish my sentence was because Histoire chomped down on my finger, surprising both me and the author. (A/N: WHERE IS THE LOGIC!?) 'I guess i underestimated her jaw strength...if that's a thing you underestimate at all…' I puffed my cheeks out and said to Histoire, "Could you hurry up with the lecture? I'm a very busy person, you know…" Histoire's left eye twitched as she tried not to blow up in my face. "You don't work at all!" "Whoa, Histoire, take a chill pill, I'm just messing with you~" "Yes, yes, of course…" She replied, rubbing her temples. After she calmed down, she motioned for me to follow her. "You need to come see this, Neptune." "Kay~!" I replied, adding a little Neptune zest. On the outside i remained as though i was really Neptune, but on the inside i was disgusted and disturbed by my actions. 'I feel like an anime trap…'
Histoire led me to the room where the Sharicite was contained. I studied the object closely, greatly captivated by it. 'I've never seen one up close...sure, the anime and games show you pictures, but it's not everyday that you get to see and touch a Sharicite…' I noticed that the Sharicite, which was supposed to be pulsating with the nation's shares, was dimmer than it should be. Histoire went over to the Sharicite, turned around and faced me. "I see you've noticed the Sharicite has visibly weakened. I ask you, how did this happen?" 'She's being sarcastic…' And she had perfect right to. I had been lazy and performed few share raising missions. Those recorded in this story were the only ones i've done since i've gotten here, which was a month ago. Histoire was not finished, however. "Did you think this was a video game where you are free from all responsibility? Did you think that you could escape what people have to do in order to live?" "Uh...yeah, kinda…" I said quietly, avoiding eye contact. Histoire sighed and closed her eyes in annoyance. "Really, Neptune, I'd thought you'd get the hang of this by now, but it seems my trust was displaced…" I felt a tug on my heartstrings. 'Man, if i had known i was doing this sort of thing to Histoire...does Neptune even know?' Deciding to earn Neptune some points with Histoire, I yelled out loudly, saying, "Well, if that's the case,what do i gotta do!?" Histoire brightened up. "Really? You'll voluntarily work for some shares?" I nodded vigorously, failing at concealing my grin. And it only grew larger as i watched her smile the tiniest and cutest smile. "Thank you Neptune. It does mean a lot that you'll work with me for once." As i jumped up onto my feet, a little "boing!" escaped my lips. 'I'm getting way too into this...better not go too far…' Histoire floated up beside me, and after exchanging a smile, we left the room. Just as the elevator door closed, i asked Histoire, "What am i doing, anyway?" "You'll see…"
Oh, yeah, i see alright…"Histoire, why do i have to work here!?" "Well, you did say you wanted to help. Plus, it's the only way to get shares fast." I crossed my arms and huffed at the sight before me. "But did it have to be a maid cafe!?" Yes, the building standing in front of Histoire and I was a nefarious maid cafe, or at least it was evil in my eyes. Why, you ask? Because i am the soul of a self respecting boy who does not cross-dress nor do i wish to. But, here i was, standing in front of one, ready to accept the job offered, and wear an outfit with stockings and take people's orders, whom which are not all nice. Histoire, however, gave no fucks and pushed me right in. "Hey, whoa whoa! Hold on there! Be gentle~!" That last remark was unintentional...anyway…
Histoire did not cease shoving me across the cafe against my will until we arrived at the counter. "Now we wait for the owner. I made an appointment…" I looked at her with tears in my eyes. "You would've done this whether i said yes or no!?" Histoire nodded, not even bothering to look at my pained expression. After waiting for some time, Histoire suggested that we go into the backroom. I did some quick thinking, and came up with an excuse. "But, we have no clearance to go back there!" She made a "tsk" sound, and told me, "We have reason to be here. On top of that, we are the top authorities, we are essentially allowed to go anywhere. However, since you act like a child, you must refrain from doing such actions until i can trust you." I crossed my arms and huffed. "I'm not a little kid…" Oh, the irony…
After we met up with the cafe owner, i was put right to work. I was told to wear this maid outfit, which was hugging my body tightly, showing every curve i had that was not hidden by the skirt. On top of that, i had to wear stockings and…"special" undergarments for the perverted ones. For, as a maid, i must attend to every need my "master/mistress" asks of me. 'Damn, i hate this job…' i thought as i wiped off one of the tables. The maid part itself wasn't so bad, it was the things i was asked to do that made it hell. Just as i finished wiping the table, a felt something grab one of my ass cheeks. I yelped and turned around, seeing a table of two girls and three guys. The one closest to me was looking smug, whispering to his friends. Once i heard "nice and firm", the gloves came off. I tapped his shoulder and asked him to follow me to the bathroom. That earned some hoots and whistles from his gang, but i didn't care, they were perverted idiots anyway. Once in the bathroom, i took out some tape and slapped it over his mouth. When he tried to take it off, it stayed on there, stuck. "Wondering why it won't come off? Simple! It's superglued on~..." His eyes widened with horror as i tied his arms to one of the poles in the stalls. I then proceeded to beat him with one of my highheeled shoes, saying things like, "Don't you EVER do that again!" and "Women aren't toys, dumbass!" After a full forty-five minutes of smacking the helpless fool, i ripped the tape of as hard as i could. It was painful, i could tell, but before he could scream out, i covered his mouth. "Yell out and i tack on thirty more minutes…" That shut him up. I untied him, and told him if he ever told anyone about it, i would hunt him down and do that to him for the rest of his life. The jackass stumbled out of the bathroom, and plopped down next to his friends. When they asked him about what we did, he said that it was "the craziest thing he's ever experienced". The two other guys shot me some flirtatious looks, but i shot them down with a slightly psychotic look. That'll teach them to mess with women like that and...wait a sec...I'M EVEN LOSING SOME OF MY PERSONALITY!
I thought nothing could be worse than torturing a man to protect women and their image, but apparently, i was wrong. It got a lot worse. To be specific, Noire, and the other two CPUs of Gamindustri were right there, sitting at one of the tables, orders ready. The one on the right was Blanc, the CPU of Lowee, who usually keeps her emotions bottled up and wears a poker face. However, anger her in some way, and she'll go ballistic, throwing cuss words everywhere. She has short light brown hair, blue eyes, and a mushroom like cap (A/N: Kinda like Toad from Mario. Her nation is Lowee, after all, representing Nintendo, so it makes sense) with a brown lining on the bottom of the cap, making a circle in the middle of the front part. On each side of the circle is a fold of the cap with light blue frills. She has a short, white sleeveless dress with brown straps and three X stitchings going down to her waist, ending at her crossed belt. She has no leggings or leg covers of any sort, which is kinda strange considering she comes from a cold country, and a coat that is very large on her, with brown fur at the shoulders and folded sleeves at the end. The coat is also white, with some brown here and there. The edges of the coat are blue, each with a red jewel on the end. When in HDD, her hair turns light blue in long sideburns, and a white suit with red in some places. In this form, she is angry and oppressive, and is not afraid to use her axe on anything that moves. The one on the left was Vert, the CPU of Leanbox, who is a feminine and refined woman with an abnormal breast size, which is larger than my Purple Heart form's size. When in HDD, she gains a more laid back attitude, however, and is often proud of her bust size. She had long blonde hair and blue eyes. She wore white gloves that go up to her elbows, and mostly green boots, with the feet portion white, and the middle of the top portion gold, with gold lining around the opening. The top part of the dress was green, with gold lining the edge of the cups that held her breasts. The lower portion was all white, with pink ribbon like cloths on each side of her hips. The edges of her dress were large and pointed. There was a sense of frilliness in her clothes. In HDD form, her hair turns from blonde to green, tied in a pony tail, and a white outfit showed more skin than the rest of us. Her stomach, her legs, even the bottom of her breasts were out for the world to see when in this form!
I could feel my stomach churn as i looked at them. I tried to convince the other maids to do it, but they had their hands full, either flirting with men/women or doing actual work. After a full ten minutes of stalling, i grew a pair and approached them. "Ah, there you are, Neptune. We've waited ten minutes for service!" Noire said with the most smug look. I stared back with surprise. "H-how'd you know I-!" "Nepgear, Uni, Rom and Ram saw you in the cafe and told us about it. They didn't go in since they said 'it wasn't their style'. I honestly think they're just afraid of walking into a maid cafe." Vert said, bouncing those damn breasts in everyone's faces. It captivated just about every man in the cafe, and a couple of women as well. Blanc had trouble concealing her anger. "Could you please refrain from showing us your oversized bags of-" I cut her off right then and there and asked for their orders. I did not want a fight in this cafe. If there was, i could get in trouble for it. So, i wrote down their orders and got the requested food and refreshments about ten minutes later. Just as i was about to walk away, Noire spoke up. "So, Neptune, what's the reason for all this? Don't tell me it's to get extra shares…" I felt my cheeks burn up, and that was all the verification they needed, and proceeded to laugh. It was a refined, laughter, of course, because they are posed women and not Neptune-like. I huffed and walked away, seemingly to nowhere in particular. Luckily, my shift was over and i could leave. I changed back into my comfortable clothes and walked out of the cafe. As i walked back to the Basilicom, something caught my eye. It was someone with their hood up, shadily walking into an alleyway. 'Classic…' I thought as i snuck in behind them. Inside the alleyway was a lair hidden under a manhole. (A/N: This gets cheesier and cheesier…) The entire area was filled with consoles i've seen in advertisements, and some that were still in development, while others were completely different from what i've seen. 'The thief from Lastation!' Then, the shady figure pulled down his hood and revealed...my face!? I couldn't stop myself from gasping, and the figure quickly turned towards my hiding spot. He grabbed a steel pipe and approached slowly. At the last moment i jumped out at him and pinned him down, knocking the pipe away in the process. He tried to fight back, but i was so filled with rage since this guy posed as me, i punched him in the face, and punched the side of his head, hearing a cracking noise. Satisfied with his dizzy looking face, i stood up. It was at that moment that his form fizzled, and he changed into a she. That she was Linda the Underling, an enemy Neptune has encountered many times. And on the side of her head was a weird looking device, cracked and in pieces.
END
Koutetsu: Whoo! I finally stopped procrastinating! How'd ya like that plot twist?
Souta: Pretty lame, but i'll give you points for creativity.
Koutetsu: Good enough for me! Now, i'd like to thank the people supporting me thus far, one of which is named Tf2Scout! He/she is the person who gave me the last push to get this thing updated, and i'm glad they did. Look how this one turned out!
Neptune: It's kinda shitty.
Koutetsu: Shut up. Anyway, thanks for reading my garbage, leave a review if desired, and remember to eat your flapjacks. KOUTETSU, OUT!