Written July 14 and 15, 2011.

Disclaimer: This is fan fiction. That means I possibly own the plot, the snake, its eggs, and nothing else. That also means I do not own Harry and Co.

Warnings: A great deal of sexual stuff including but not necessarily limited to: masturbation, future bestiality with a snake, male Veela, slash of the male on male variety and heterosexual relations.

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Chapter 4: Problems in Potions

For once Harry's troubles did not leave him while he was flying. He pulled up abruptly and just sat on his broom, back to the late afternoon sun. His eyes drifted to where Hermione sat. He knew what she had been thinking when she moved on from the black. Black hair perhaps could be anyone of nearly a quarter of the school. As for favorite color, who knew? But black eyes, well, only one person he knew had black eyes.

Snape. Bane of Gryffindors. Harasser of Hufflepuffs. Ridiculer of Ravenclaws. The greasy git, the dungeon bat, the childhood rival of his father, the bastard who went out of his way to make Harry's life miserable.

Snape, who had confiscated his snake, and done who knows what to it for three days. Harry conceded to himself that he now had a much better idea of what that unmitigated bastard had been doing.

Flashback- Late August

He had gone down to breakfast with Ron and Hermione, only to be pulled aside by Ginny. She handed his snake back to him, the pale scales luminous in the dim hallway. She pulled him close, kissed him, then pushed him back. He looked bemusedly at her.

"Harry, that toy is a rip-off; it hardly does anything at all. It doesn't even vibrate on command." Harry felt rather disturbed by her casual tone. She said very seriously, "I hope that you can get a refund."

Harry choked.

"What's wrong, Harry?" She stared at him, concern clear in her chocolate brown eyes. "Are you not feeling well?"

Harry could hardly tell her what was wrong, so he came up with another 'brilliant' lie. "No, Gin, I'm fine. It's, well, you see…"

"Spit it out Har," she grinned at him. Harry felt weak in the knees. Her hair seemed to glow slightly with its own light, her eyes sparkled brightly, and that dimple. He kissed her again. She pushed him back.

"Harry…" Her tone was somewhat ominous. Harry grinned unrepentantly at her

"Well, Gin, I've been messing around with some ideas…" Harry hesitated, and then continued, "Sort of about what I'm going to do after school, and what if I invented stuff? I mean, as famous as I am (much as you know I dislike it), unless the stuff I'm selling is awful, people will buy it, right? So, what if I invented a …um, adult toy?"

She interrupted him, "This is your 'invention'?" Harry nodded sheepishly. Ginny threw her head back and let out a bright bell-like peal of laughter. "Harry, if that's what you want to do, then I'm supporting you all the way. But it really needs work. See if you can find a vibrating spell, and I'll think about what else you could add." And with that she turned away and headed towards the Great Hall for breakfast.

Harry sighed. More spells to put on his already enchanted member. It blinked at him, more evidence that it was not a real snake, it had eyelids. At least she didn't think that there was anything else going on. Harry pushed himself off the wall, and followed. No reason to go to Potions class on an empty stomach after all.

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"Potter, ten points from Gryffindor for tardiness." Harry glared hatefully at the Potions Professor. Malfoy strutted through the doorway after Harry, but the greasy git had turned away. Harry stormed over to Ron's and his lab station and sat with a quiet but no less angry huff. Ron gave him a sympathetic look but did not dare say anything; the Bat's keen ears were always pricked for students speaking out of turn.

Harry got to work, chopping, dicing, cubing, shredding… The class was almost over and he was racing against time, just a few more steps… It's got to turn green, stir three times counterclockwise, then a figure eight clockwise. He stared incredulous at his finished potion. He looked to Hermione's, then back. It was exactly the same silvery blue. He almost felt like cheering aloud, until Snape called for the class's attention.

Harry was horrified. There, in his Potion Professor's slimy hands was a white snake with gold eyes. It seemed pleased to be the entire class's focus and flushed slightly pink as it curled around Snape's narrow fingers. Harry could feel his arousal, even as he was thankful he could not also feel the hands holding it up for the class to inspect.

"Which of you idiotic dunderheads brought your pet to class?" Snape hissed as he stalked through the students. Harry reluctantly raised his hand. While he would very much like to have it back now, if not yesterday; it was clear the Bat was on the warpath.

"Potter, I might have guessed." Snape loomed over him, and Harry felt the height difference keenly as he shrunk away. "For reckless endangerment of an animal, fifteen points off Gryffindor; for reckless endangerment of your classmates, thirty-five points off; for disobeying school rules on which animals may be kept as pets, twenty; and another five for thinking you could get away with it." Here, the bastard raised one fine, black eyebrow in anticipation of backtalk. Harry stared sullenly up at him. "I shall also keep the animal until you have a note signed by your head of house giving you permission to have it." Harry paled as Snape's thumb rubbed across the snake's head. Harry was disgusted when he realized that given the man's short distance from himself he could feel that thumb and those hands and it felt very good. He almost said something that surely would have resulted in more point loss when Hermione boldly interjected.

"Sir, surely," she had hardly begun when Snape cut her off.

"I do not wish to hear it, Ms. Granger. Potter, furthermore you shall have an hour of detention with me each day until I have that note in my hands. It will start at 7:45 tonight. Do not be late." He sneered around at the class, all of whom tried to pretend that they had not all been watching the drama unfold. "Bottle and cap what pitiful excuses you have for today's potion and turn it in now." Snape strode to the front of the class, snake in a robe pocket.

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It had taken Harry three days to get his appointment with Professor McGonagall, and while she saw nothing wrong with him having two pets, provided he could manage them (he assured her he could) he still had undergone three back breaking cauldron cleaning sessions courtesy of Snape. More disturbingly still, he had been frequently hard, as though someone was stroking him and had ejaculated a number of times, though not noticed by others, in public.

Damn Snape.

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