Chapter 4
"As the smallest initiate and the only Abnegation born, initiation seems close to impossible, for me at least.
The odds, it seems, are not in my favor."
Christina's eyes follow me down the hallway as we follow Eric and Tobias. I know she wants to question me on what happened in the lunchroom so I stay five feet in front of her, dreading our confrontation.
Where are we even going?
All of us, every one of the initiates are thinking this, but we're not dumb enough to ask Eric the question, especially while he has that smirk on his face.
After what seems like hours of walking, Eric stops in front of a pair of wooden double doors and turns to face us, smiling at our pained expressions.
My legs ache, and I bend to rub them, but the gleam in Eric's eyes stop me.
"I can see your all out of shape." he says, his voice dangerously low.
Peter scowls, but even he knows better then to talk back to the Dauntless leader who exudes such a dangerous aura.
"Listen to these rules, because if they're not followed..." Eric trails off, his eyes holding a dangerous intensity. "you must be in the training room by 8' o clock sharp, every day. Training is from 8 to 6, with a break at 4 for lunch. Free time is after training, then you are free to do whatever you like."
We nod, though dread twists my stomach. "That much training? Where will Tovyia be during this?"
Eric's eyes follow mine down to Tovyia, and he smiles eerily.
"Babies are not allowed in the training room, and we don't have a daycare area here at Dauntless." he says.
Peter, and a few others snicker at his jibe which is clearly directed towards me. I lower my eyes as my cheeks burn.
"Behind these doors," Tobias says abruptly. "are the rooms you will be sleeping in."
Eric shoots him a look before he starts talking again. "Dauntless-born's and new initiates are kept separate for the first level of initiation, though that doesn't mean you will be evaluated separately."
"But isn't that unfair?" Christina interrupts. I shoot her a glance as I wait for her to be reprimanded, but Eric doesn't seem to mind.
"I'm glad you asked that." his voice is a purr as he turns to face Christina. "fairness? No such thing in Dauntless. If this offends you in any way, you are welcome to leave, right now."
Christina doesn't move, though her eyes narrow.
Eric smiles as he turns back to the rest of us initiates. "At the end of the initiation process, your rankings and the dauntless born rankings will be put together and evaluated. And only ten of you will make it."
My mouth goes dry as I try to process this new bit of information.
As the smallest initiate and the only Abnegation born, initiation seems close to impossible, for me at least.
The odds, it seems, are not in my favor.
..
The question I was dreading from Christina never comes, and the walk into the dorm room is quiet. I wait for everyone to sleep to get up, in the middle of the night and enter the bathroom.
I shut the door and undress myself.
My reflection catches my eye and I peer at myself, almost disappointed at what I see.
The girl staring back at me is lanky and thin. She's flat chested, her nose is much to large, and faint stretch marks cling to her belly, a faint reminder of the experience I can't seem to escape from.
Her eyes shine with faint nervousness, and her face is much to pale to be considered pretty.
Tovyia lets out a soft whine and I stare down at her, my beautiful mistake.