Disclaimer: We do not own Naruto or the Akatsuki. Contains Kakuzu.
_________________________________________________________________
Kakuzu ate happily on the meat given to him. He was laying on a nice flat rock, taller than the others, and eating. One tigress came up to him a few minutes earlier, only to be scared away. He sighed when he had finished eating and let his thoughts travel.
Of course, he shouldn't care about the money the zoo is using, but still. If it were a lot, he'd pounce and rip their throats open. He sighed out a growl and rested his head on his paws.
He didn't want a mate. I know, weird thing for a tiger to think, but still. Tigresses are too picky!
Always saying, "Oh, I want a cave to mate in!", "Stay with me to raise the cubs?", and sometimes even, "I'm not stalking you! I'm just so in love that I want to have your cubs all the time!"
He shook his head. Just thinking about it was giving him a headache. Even human females were annoying!
Saying things like, "But, honey, this is a really rare purse for just $100!!", "Can't you just buy me some shoes? Don't you love me?", or maybe, "I don't have sex until i'm married."
He growled at his thoughts, hoping to chase them away along with some others getting too close to him. Humans passed by his cage a million times, and he had learned to ignore them. Sure he was the only white-and-tan Bengal Tiger in this God-forsaken zoo, and sure he was constantly being stared at, but ignoring it makes it easier.
Of course there was one time when a human got too annoying, yelling at him to roar or do something other than just lay on his comfy rock. And he did something alright. After forty minutes of listening to him rant, he finally got him away from all the other humans and cracked his neck using his threads.
Ok, turning from tiger to human and back again was pretty crazy, but amazingly he had been given the ability to extract threads- veins? -from his stripes- that looked a lot like stitches as his human form has- to attack from a distance.
Let's just say the zoo owner wasn't happy about cleaning up the body.
Kakuzu knew the owner as an acquaintance, but nothing else. The owner knew of Kakuzu's ability to turn forms, and to extract those weapons from his stitches. The owner let him stay there for protection.
Kakuzu, you see, isn't all that laid back. The only reason why he is in this zoo when it is opened is because when night comes, he is let out. His street clothes are held for him, along with his gun, and he goes out to con suckers and idiots left on the street for their money.
He wouldn't have been able to stay in the zoo if he weren't the Albino Bengal Tiger he was. The owner already owned a good amount of orange-and-black tigers, but never one looking so elegant or stunning as Kakuzu.
Now he sounds like an item to be purchased at a store. Hey, at least he would be paid for laying there, looking pretty.
Yep, he didn't pay for his stay, the owner paid him! What an idiot to accept such an offer!
Kakuzu chuckled at his thoughts now, only emitting a soft chuffle to human ears.
_________________________________________________________________
Kakuzu got up from his rock when the lights grew dim. He padded his way into the back where the vets and zoo-keepers were. Some jumped out of his way, others just nodding 'hello' to him, and the newer workers screaming and running away.
He liked scaring them. It was funny to see their expression change from happy and smiling to terrified and frowning. He chuckled when a few others ran away, then soon changed into the human he was.
He had jet-black hair, reaching to his shoulders. He was wearing a black t-shirt and black dress pants. He pulled on a similar black jacket and pulled on his hat and mask, covering the hair and the scars going across his mouth. He walked out of the zoo, hearing small 'Bye, Kakuzu. Come back in one piece."
What a pun.
________________________________________________________________
"Give me the god damned money!" Kakuzu growled, holding the gun to the poor mans' head.
"I-I-I-I have n-n-n-no clue w-what you're t-t-t-talking about!" He whimpered, shaking under the tall man.
"Give me all of your money! Are you stupid?!" He growled out, pushing the tip of the gun harder into the guys' head.
"Please! Stop!" He cried out, trying desperately to get his wallet.
"Hurry up and I'll leave you alone!" He grunted.
Then there was a loud 'slush' noise and the mans' head came off. Kakuzu gave a somewhat shocked look, not expecting it one bit. He turned to look, holding up his gun to see a silver-haired male wearing a black cloak with five clouds on it.
The cloak was split open at the chest, revealing a nicely built torso. Said male also had a nice looking scythe in his hand.
"Oi, having trouble?" He said in a somewhat annoyed voice.
"The hell are you?" Kakuzu snarled, keeping his gun up.
"Hm, I like the way you fucking talk. Names Hidan, asshole." He said, letting his head lean to one side in a tired way, "You get up late at night, huh?"
"Tch, what would you know!" Kakuzu said, rolling his eyes, keeping the gun pointed.
"Put that fucking toy down!" This 'Hidan' person said, lifting the scythe to point at the weapon.
"It's my protection against you. Why should I leave myself defenseless?" Kakuzu asked, frowning under his mask.
"Defenseless? I don't think you have a fucking clue. You're already defenseless, dumbass!" Hidan said, sighing and keeping his scythe up. The blade came off and started towards him. Kakuzu didn't flinch, knowing it wasn't aimed right to hit him.
But Hidan never wanted to hit him.
Instead, the wire connecting the handle to the blade curled around the back of Kakuzu's neck to pull him closer and down to Hidan's height.
"Come with me and you won't get hurt." Hidan said, looking over the tan male.
"I wouldn't go with you. You have nothing to offer." Kakuzu said, frowning.
"Hm... good fucking point. How about... You come with me, you get to hear what Leader says instead of listening to me like that fucker agreed to do." Hidan said, looking into the black-and-green eyes of his target.
"Hm..." Kakuzu thought over it, looking over the pale man. He had magenta eyes, probably only pants under the cloak, and a complete buff fit. Probably from exercising his whole life.
"Will I be paid?" Kakuzu said, thinking about finally being able to leave that damned cage of his.
"Maybe. You'd have to speak with Leader-san about that." Hidan said, shrugging, "Come on, little fucker, let's go."
They walked off, Hidan putting the scythe back together and hooking it on his back.
"So... you're part of a group?" Kakuzu asked as they past multiple dim lamp posts.
"I tend to think of it as a mafia of some sort." Hidan said, shrugging and still walking.
"Mafia of what? Short people with pink eyes?" Kakuzu said, smiling under his mask.
"Bastard." Hidan grumbled, looking away from the man in anger, "No, a mafia of people like you. People who can turn from animal to human to animal again."
"Why'd you say 'people like you'? Why not 'people like me and you'?" Kakuzu asked, frowning.
"Because I can't change from shitty will alone. I need fucking help. I'm useless until I get it, asshole." Hidan said, getting a bit angry. Probably because he was still different.
"Hm..." Kakuzu said, not really knowing how to respond.
"So?" Hidan asked, frowning.
" 'So' what?" Kakuzu replied, looking down at the man.
"What the hell are you?" Hidan asked, looking at him through the corner of his eye.
"White Bengal Tiger. You?" Kakuzu said, shrugging.
"Grey wolf." Hidan said, also shrugging.
"Hm..." He kept walking, "So how far is this 'Leader' person?" Kakuzu asked, feeling a bit uncomfortable.
"Fucking far away as hell." Hidan grumbled, slumping over a bit.
"Great..." Kakuzu sighed.
There was silence for a few more minutes when Hidan changed his expression and smiled up at the tan male.
"Want to turn into our animal forms and scare the shit out of people as we go towards the fucking Leader?" Hidan asked, smiling.
Kakuzu smirked. Just what he loved to do. "Sure." He said simply with a shrug.
The both kept walking for a few more seconds, then Hidan sighed.
"What is it?" Kakuzu asked, frowning.
"Can't change by myself." Hidan reminded.
"Hm..." Kakuzu sighed, thinking about how annoying it must be to be like that, "What usually makes you change?"
"Hiding or sleep to become a wolf. A big fall or break to my head to become a human." Hidan said, shrugging.
"Ah..." Kakuzu thought about it.
Soon enough -after chasing the poor Jashinist halfway across the town, scaring him shitless until he transformed into a wolf- they were running towards their destination as their animal selves, growling and snarling at humans they ran past.
________________________________________________________________
"I am Pein. This is Konan, Tobi, Deidara, and Hidan." The leader of the supposed 'mafia' said, motioning to the other people in the car.
It was currently set out like this:
Drivers seat was filled by Pein, passenger by Tobi. Back left seat was Deidara's middle was Hidan's, right back seat was Konan's.
Someone had to move.
Tobi, being the more 'adaptable' one of the group -didn't complain at all- was moved into the trunk, Konan sat in the front passenger, and Kakuzu sat where Deidara was, moving Deidara to the other side of the car.
When they set off, Tobi poked his head up and said, "Leader-san!"
"What is it Tobi?" Pein asked, sighing.
"Tobi thinks Leader-san should get a van." Tobi said, giggling as all the others agreed in shouts.
Pein sighed, "Fine, fine."
"Where are we going next, Leader-san, un?" Deidara asked, looking from the window to him.
"Canada. In search for someone very important. He might either make or break my plans." Pein explained, then coughed awkwardly, "Um, Deidara?"
"Yes?" Deidara asked, frowning.
"There is something you need to know about the person we are going to try and get. You see... he lives in a very rich area and..." He sighed, " His name is Sasori. But to you, Deidara, He will be called Sasori-Danna."
Everyone turned to look except for Konan and Pein, who kept their eyes forward.
"I... I have to.... I HAVE TO MARRY HIM?!?!" Deidara yelled, completely shocked and terrified.
He'd never thought of marriage before and this seemed a bit out of place.
"It may be the only way to get him on our side. I'll explain exactly what to do when we track him down." Pein explained, sighing at Deidara's shock.
"I'm only eighteen! I can't marry someone, un!" Deidara yelled.
"Legally, you can." Pein said, glaring at him, "And you will!"