Chapter Four
After the plane landed and started to clear out Mellie slung the backpack over her shoulders and grabbed the hands of both of her young children. Once off the airplane she went to baggage claim. After getting her bags and found the driver that would be taking her and the children to her new apartment, well, her old apartment. She had kept it even when she and Fitz moved to Santa Barbara. She used it as her escape from it all. She had always like New York more than California. When Mellie opened the door she smiled.
"Home sweet home." She thought with a small sigh, it was exactly the same since the last time she left it, which was during the campaign. She set down her suitcases and sat both of her children down on the couch. She had made sure everything was perfect weeks before. Making sure that the children's room was okay and even had someone go grocery shopping for her the day before. She wanted to start over and she wanted to do it right.
"Mommy!" She heard her son call for her, bringing her out of her thoughts.
"Yes?" She responded turning her attention to Jerry.
"I'm hungry." Jerry said.
"And what would you like sweetie?" She asked him.
"Peanut butter and jelly." The four-year old said replacing the 'L's in jelly with W's. Mellie went into the kitchen.
She made a sandwich for each of her children, cutting Karen's into fours. Mellie sat both of them at the table and watched Karen and Jerry eat, not really feeling hungry herself. After that, she felt as if the rest of the day passed her by. By the end the day she had noticed that this was the first time she had ever watched the children by herself. She had always been with Fitz or a nanny or some other family member. Mellie felt horrible, realizing how bad she had been before. How power, ambition and pain got in the way of everything, even her own marriage and children. She realized how close she was to becoming her own parents.
When she tucked Karen and Jerry in at bedtime she kissed both of them on the forehead before leaving the room. Mellie went into the kitchen and poured herself a glass of water ignoring the bottle of wine in the cabinet.
"Liv!" Cyrus said as Olivia approached him.
"How is he?" Liv asked.
"He's drowning in scotch! He refuses to leave the oval and he just requested a second bottle." Cyrus informs her and she feels her chest tighten.
"You need to help him Liv, you're the only one that can." Cyrus says and she nods as they walk to the oval. When they got there she knocked on the door.
"Come in." She heard Fitz yell, his voice slurred. She walked in and saw Fitz at his desk, facing the window. The empty bottle sat there on his desk next to the empty glass.
"Leave the bottle on the table, Tom." Fitz slurred.
"Fitz…" Liv started and he turned around facing her. He looked an absolute mess.
"Olivia! What..what are you doing here?" He asked her.
"I...Cyrus told me that Mellie left." Olivia started not really knowing what to say.
"Oh, did he? Did he also tell you that she took our children and then he blamed me for it. Or that I blame myself too." He said, drunken anger and pain in his voice.
"Fitz... this is not your fault, she did this to hurt you and to manipulate you. She.." Liv tried to comfort but it didn't work.
"But it is! I hurt her to the point where she left, she disappeared and took the children. I was supposed to be there for her and I wasn't, I left her and forgot she was human, forgot she had feelings." Fitz admitted and Liv just stared at him speechless. She shouldn't feel hurt, she knows she has no right to but she does.
"I let her cry her heart out in the bathroom and did NOTHING. I caused that, all of it." Fitz continued, standing up.
"Fitz…You didn't know this would happen, you didn't know she would leave and you didn't know she would take Karen and Jerry. That's what she does." Olivia said. The end of her sentence accusatory.
"No!" Fitz boomed startling Olivia. "This isn't what she does. She stays and she fights! She fight for what she wants, she's an animal. She doesn't just stop and give up and leave. She didn't do it the first time, why would she do it now." Fitz said his voice slurring. He unaware of what he had just said, of what he just admitted.
"The first time? What first time?" Olivia asked, her voice cracking.
"I've cheated on her before." He sighs. "When she was soft and caring, nice and sweet. I turned her into who she is now. I made her cold and manipulative. I broke her." Fitz said harshly, judging himself. His drunken state letting out his hidden feelings, his true emotions. Guilt he'd hidden and buried over the years. Olivia stood frozen in her place. His words hanging in her mind. "I promised her I would always be there and help her and instead I made her life worse than her parents did. Messed her up more than her own family." Fitz muttered regretfully and Liv stood in place, her heart breaking in pieces.
"Fitz, you still love her." Olivia told him quietly.
"What?" Fitz said shocked.
"Just say it! You still love Mellie." She says pushing back her tears. He walked closer to her but she just moved away.
"Livvy..."
"No, don't do that. Don't 'livvy' me. Do you still love her?" Olivia asked angrily.
"She's my wife, the mother of my children." Fitz says and Olivia shakes her head.
"That's not an answer! Do you still love her?" Olivia demanded.
"I...I don't know." Fitz sighed.
"You don't know? What the hell do you mean you don't know? You know what, I should have known. I was your fucking midlife crisis, just a good fuck!" Liv yelled, refusing to cry in front of him.
"I don't know how I feel about anything anymore!" Yelled Fitz picking up a glass off the the table, throwing it and watched as it shattered against the wall. "I don't know. Tell me what you want me to do and I'll do it, Liv." Fitz says tiredly.
The next day:
Mellie was awakened the next morning by both of her children climbing into her bed.
"Mommy!"
"Mama" She heard both of her children say at the same time. She sat up and looked over at the clock seeing it was eight.
"Yes." She responds, her voice slightly tired.
"We're hungry." Jerry said and Karen nodded behind him.
"Really?"
"Yup, hungy." Karen said and Mellie laughed. Her children were truly amazing and the fact that she had missed so much made her determined to make up for it.
"Okay." Mel said picking up Karen and getting out of the bed and going into the kitchen she took out a box of cheerios. She poured some dry cheerios on the tray of Karen's high chair and made Jerry a bowl. When they were done she turned on the TV and let them watch NickJr, a channel she had just found out about a week ago. Once she finished eating breakfast of her own she checked her phone and decided to call Jacquelyn.
"Mel?" She heard Lynn answer.
"Hi." Mellie responded.
"How's everything? How are Jerry and Karen? You made it safely right?" Jaquelyn fired off question over the phone.
"Glad to know you care. Yes, we made it safely and Jerry and Karen are fine." Mellie answered.
"Good. How are you feeling?" Said Jacquelyn.
"I'm fine." Mellie lied.
"No you're not! You may be a good liar but it can't get passed me." She said knowingly.
"I'm okay, at least I will be." Mel said with a sigh.
"Take the kids to a park." Lynn said.
"What?" Mellie asked, confused.
"Take them to a park, it will distract you, trust me. I'll call you back later, there's someone at the door." Jacquelyn says.
"Okay bye." Mellie said before hanging up.
She took Jacquelyn's words into consideration and decided to take the kids to the park. She began taking things out of the suitcases before getting the children dressed. After that she got dressed herself and pulled out the stroller. Happy it was mid-spring, she decided that she walk to the park that she used to go to when she was having a hard time. It wasn't far away from the apartment and perfect for Karen and Jerry. After putting both children in the twin stroller and grabbing her keys, she left the apartment and began walking to the park.
Xx***xX
After Jacquelyn got off of the phone there was a knock at the door. She got up off the couch expecting it to be her husband and answered the door to two secret service agents and the President of the United States.
"Hello Jackie." Fitz said.
"Well isn't this a surprise. What do you want?" Lynn said not intimidated by him.
"Where is she?" Fitz asked, venom in his voice attempting to take a step closer but she stopped him.
"I don't know. And if I did, I wouldn't tell you. I would never hurt her like that, like EVERYONE else in her life has. I don't know where she went, she didn't tell me. Just let her start over." Jaquelyn said slamming the door in his face.
Xx***xX
Once Mellie arrived at the park she unstrapped Jerry out of the stroller and watched as he went straight to the slides. She pushed the stroller over to bench where she could sit down and see Jerry play. She turned the stroller around so she could see Karen who was content just playing with her teddy bear. It was the same teddy bear Mellie played with when she was little. When she looked back up she saw Jerry playing with a little girl with fiery red hair. For some reason the girl looked familiar but she ignored it. She looked back down at Karen and began to play peek-a-boo with her. When Mellie looked back up at the slides she couldn't see Jerry. She looked over at all the play sets and couldn't see him anywhere. She began to panic until she heard him.
"Mommy!" She turned her head and saw Jerry running over to her and the little girl he was playing with not far behind him.
"Hi baby, don't run off like that. You had me worried." She said, moving some of his hair out of his face.
"I'm sowwy." Jerry said and she smiled.
"It okay. Who is your friend?" She asked.
"She's 'lexis." Jerry said.
"Hi Alexis." Mellie said kindly and the little girl waves.
"Alexis!" They heard a man call. Mellie looked over to see Richard Castle, the man whose face was on the back of all of her favourite books. Alexis ran over to her father and he smiled. They watched as both of their children ran back over to the playground.
"Hi. I'm ..." He said to when he looked at her.
"Richard Castle." She accidentally said out loud, not meaning to.
"You're a fan." He jokes and her cheeks turn red.
"I am. I'm Melody." She says.
"Nice to meet you Melody." He says with a smile.
"Nice to meet you too." Mellie responds smiling back.