By her side
Chapter 4:
It wasn't long before Callie had made an escape and all but ran out of the conference room directly back to the bathrooms. When she barged in the few nurses that hadn't been, being nosy and not so discreetly peering into the conference room quickly fled the bathroom. Callie sunk to the ground of the bathroom once they had all left her frame shaking. Her body, her mind was overwhelmed.
She stared at the papers in her hands.
Anger overcame her as she realised that he had never sent the papers in. She had been waiting all these weeks. No wonder it was taking so long. How selfish of him. He was screwing around with Stevens and yet he'd hidden their divorce papers in his family drawer! Who did he think he was...
And now his parents expected, wanted her to make the decision to...
No. She couldn't do it, she wouldn't. It wasn't her place. It should be their decision his loving mother and his loving father should be the ones to decide not the estranged ex wife who had been cheated on and then demanded a divorce. Or Stevens and Grey even Christina and Alex, this was their decision, the decision should be theirs. They loved him, they were crying for him, they were missing him too.
You always loved him Arizona's accusation floated back to her...It made her chest heave as the tears came back.
The door of the bathroom swung open and Christina walked in. She took one look at Callie and walked over to her sliding down the wall next to her.
The two women sat in silence, far away in their own minds, but finding comfort in one another. They were both unsure of whom it actually was that reached to grab the other woman's hand but they found themselves sitting quietly clutching each other's hands.
Christina and Callie both jumped at the loud page that pierced the silence of the bathroom,
All available medical personnel please make your way to the ER. Multiple person MVA involving a bus en route. ETA 2 minutes. All available medical personnel please make your way to the ER.
Christina tuned her mind out for the first time ignoring what usually comforted her, what usually allowed her to feel normal when nothing else did. All she wanted to do now was to sit here, numb, with Callie and not face the world on the other side of that door.
The door opened again and this time Mark stepped in shutting it behind him making them both jump again. He looked at the two women and moved towards them crouching down in front of them.
"How're you doing?" His concerned voice made her heart ache and she squeezed Christina's hand tighter.
"I'm ok" Mark nodded,
"Chris do you reckon you can drive?" He asked her softly and she nodded,
"Why don't you two head home"
Christina shook her head,
"The bus..the accident we...surgeries..." Mark looked at her,
"We've got it covered Chris, you just get each other home and Owen and I will meet you there later, ok?" Callie who hadn't even heard the page to the ER looked at Mark,
"Will you come over later?"
"I promise love"
Callie looked at Mark, as if considering him,
"Save an extra one for me" She whispered and Mark smiled and leant forward to kiss her head,
"I will"
He leaned back smiling slightly and grasped one of each of the women's hands pulling them both up.
"Now I have to run but as Owen said we'll both be checking that you're home within the next half an hour, understood" Christina rolled her eyes, it was just like Owen to say something like that.
Mark opened the door for them and they moved out, Callie's eyes flickered to the conference room but it was dark and vacant. Mark caught her gaze and offered an explanation,
"Grey and Stevens took them back to their place to settle in" Callie nodded
Ten minutes later Callie and Christina were in the dark, scarlet red car Christina had recently purchased, the latter driving. It was a relatively silent drive back to the apartment yet not an awkward one. The only words spoken were when Christina made a de tour to the local take out place where she ordered a hell of a lot of their favourite foods.
They took it home and spread out in the lounge room with the food. Callie retrieved blankets and pillows for them while Christina put on an old movie. They settled down and the movie started. It was only then in the comfort and privacy of their apartment did Christina find tears spilling down her face. Never one to cry and hating when she did it she swiped the tears away annoyed focusing her attention on the film. Callie had just thrown the box of tissues she had been using at her and then had almost genuinely smiled when it hit her in the head causing Christina to flip her a bird and turn away from her again. Callie didn't mention it though, but she smiled when Christina fell asleep twenty minutes later happy her friend was finally getting some rest.
...
Hours later Owen and Mark moved into the apartment, as they quietly dropped their stuff onto the floor and the table they took in the scene before them, Christina was sound asleep in the armchair while Callie was wide awake staring into the distance unblinking. Owen glanced at Mark who was watching her with worry. As Owen moved further into the room Callie jumped suddenly realising they were there. She clutched her heart as Owen whispered,
"Hey Cal, sorry" She shook her head and looked to Mark,
They watched Owen pick up Christina and turned back to them briefly,
"We'll see you two in the morning, yeah?"
"Night mate" Mark said,
"Goodnight" Callie's voice was hollow, detatched. Owen bidded them goodnight before carrying Christina down the hall to her room. Mark moved to Callie and sat down on the couch next to her. She almost fell sideways lying down along the couch and resting her head in his lap. His fingers moved to her hair running them through it.
"Hey Cal"
Her hand gripped his leg, holding it almost like she was hugging a teddy bear. He couldn't stop the smile spreading over his face at her position.
"Hi Mark, did you save one for me?"
"Course I did, I promised you didn't I?"
She nodded,
"Her name is Abby Reynolds, she is seven years old and she was one of the passengers on the bus. She had second degree burns and she kissed my cheek just like you do when I put the salve on her burns and minimised the scaring. Well it might have had a bit to do with the anaesthetic I put in her drip too but hey?" Callie smiled listening to him,
"George wanted a baby"
Marks smile faded as he frowned down to Callie,
"He wanted a baby and I told him I wasn't ready, I mean I think I was ready Mark ...I know...I wanted kids I'm ...I want to be a mum but..."
"Callie you had just made chief resident and you're parents had declared that they hated you, I think you had enough on your plate" His fingers continued to run through her silky midnight hair.
"Who was I to deny him from being a father, what was –"
"Callie" His voice was forceful and almost reprimanding.
"You didn't deny George anything, he did that when he slept with Stevens, he denied himself the chance to be a father, to be a husband, your husband, to have a family, he denied himself a chance to be loved by you"
"But I still love him" Mark nodded,
"I know you do baby, I know" Callie's chin quivered and Mark ran a hand down her arm caressing her skin.
"George knew that you loved him Callie, he knew you cared, knew you wanted to be with him, so stop thinking that you didn't love him enough or tell him enough or whatever way you're currently trying to blame yourself, I'm not going to let you do that to yourself." Her arms tightened around his leg before she untangled one of them and reached to the coffee table grabbing the papers she had barely let out of her sight all afternoon and handed them to Mark who inspected the papers.
He had heard what they were like everybody else but seeing them was different, he could see how much pain and anguish they were causing her.
"He didn't send them in" She shook her head confirming his statement,
"Mmhm I'm still a married woman"
He then looked at the other document his heart swelling for her knowing if there was one thing that would break her it was that. Obviously she knew what he was looking at,
"I can't" She whispered,
He nodded in understanding,
"Why do they think I can? Why do they think I should be the one to decide?"
"I didn't know that you were so close with them" Mark asked,
"George and I ..we went up to visit them most times me and him could get a few days off together, it was great, his family are beautiful. The last time we went up there together, about a week before we were coming back George said he had to come back because of Meredith and Izzie or something I never really found out exactly why. But I stayed up there so I got to know them all pretty well"
He nodded learning more about her as he did each day.
"But I still can't ...I...Meredith rang before" Mark's eyebrows shot up in curiosity. He had seen Greys hostility to Callie and wondered what on earth she had to say,
"She wants us to go to their place tomorrow night. Louise and Harold want to talk about the funeral and they want me and Chris there...and...I don't know if I can do that Mark. I don't know if I can take that as...I mean I knew there was going to be a funeral but...his brothers will be there and his cousins his little cousins who are so cute and..."
"Me." She felt Mark's eyes on her. "If you want me there I'll be there with you Callie and Owen and Christina will be there too. We've got you Cal, we'll get you through this I promise...I'll get you through this" He watched her tears flood back and resumed running his fingers through her curls again. After a while he felt her relax and it wasn't long before she spoke,
"Could you come with me please Mark?"
"Of course Cal"
He bent his body and dropped a light kiss on her forehead.
"Get some sleep Callie"
Within minutes she dropped off to sleep in Marks secure arms. Mark watched her sleep knowing that the thoughts of George, his family and the next few days were still plaguing her even as she slept. Following Owens earlier actions he picked Callie up, blanket and all and walked her through to her bedroom. He sat on the side of the bed and gently pulled her shoes off that she hadn't bothered with when she'd arrived home and even more gently and patiently pulled her jacket off very slowly trying not to completely wake her up. He mimicked his actions on her, putting his shoes where he had dropped hers and letting his jacket drop to the floor to join hers as well. He climbed into the bed and almost instinctively she moved towards his body. He wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her closer into his chest.
"Goodnight Callie"
What do you think?
Sorry that it took me a while to update I'll try and get the next one up much quicker for you