His legs dangled over the cliffs edge. Looking over the village that he regarded as his home for so many years. The sound of a party could be heard clearly behind him. The sounds of people shouting and laughing as they enjoyed themselves without a care in the world.

'' this party is for you. You should enjoy it instead of running off by yourself.'' a familiar voice was heard as Naruto felt a weight pressed on his head. Turning around, he saw the masked face of his former teacher with what he presumed to be a smile.

'' I am enjoying myself Kakashi-sensei. It's just a bit too much to take in.'' Naruto replied as tears started to well up in his eyes. Before Kakashi had a chance to reply, naruto continued on.

'' nobody has ever arranged something like this before for my birthdays. Old man Hokage tried to make some time for me occasionally and pervy sage tried to make it special from every other day but it's not the same.''

'' your only seventeen this year Naruto, your birthday celebrations will keep getting better. Now lets head back to the party, can't let the food that Sasuke paid for go to waste can we?'' his trademark eye smile clear as day to Naruto as they both walked back to where most of the activity seemed to be centered around.

A large table was present and around sat some of Naruto's friends while the others watch on from the side. Cards were dealt to the players and sake was poured. No one questioned the presence of sake or the cards all which were most likely brought in by tsunade.

Looking from the outside, the scene was comical. The fifth Hokage was seated at the center of the table, dealing out cards with a tinge of red on her cheeks clearly drunk, shizune at her side desperately urging her to stop. Sakura, Ino, Tenten, Kiba were clearly drunk as well as they sat along the table, cards in their hands. Choji and Shikamaru was off to the side as they discussed things that Naruto could not pick up, Shino was silently observing the actions of his teammate. Kakashi had left Naruto's side to join in the games, taking a seat right between his student and the Hokage. Naruto was fine with this, even if it was his birthday every one should have the opportunity to enjoy themselves. He was fine as long as Lee had zero contact with any alcohol of any kind.

So much had happened in the short seventeen years of his life. Ever since he came to this world. From the sealing of Kurama moments after his birth. The day he met Hiruzen. The day he stole the scroll of seals and learned of his status as host. When he met Zabuza and Haku. His entering of the chuunin exams and the invasion led by sound and sand. Looking for Granny Tsunade and learning of the Akatsuki. He could go on and on and now that he looked at it, his life was extremely abnormal but he would have it no other way as each event had influenced him and left him with things he would not forget. It was such events that moulded him to be the person he was now.

As he was recalling about his past, something caught on the corner of his eye. A familiar dark blue colored hair and the unmistakable pupil-less eyes which belonged to the Hyuga clan. The sight of Hinata made Naruto's heart hurt, as he was reminded of Neji. They did not meet on good terms, but over time they had became friends and when neji laid down his life to protect him, it had served as a reminder of the weight he was carrying.

Hinata had also reminded him of another point in his life, the first confession of love he had received. A confession he had yet to reply to. He was still unsure of love and what it even meant. All his life he strived for acknowledgement and respect. To escape from the lonely abyss he was once apart of and he had never once thought of love. He had always said that he had loved Sakura but he knew it was just another way to compete with Sasuke.

Did he love Hinata? He knew that Hinata loved him but what if he did not love her? Was he even mature enough to be in a relationship. He honestly did not know. He looked up towards the stars hoping for an answer. The stars were bright and the constellations were clear.

'' Naruto, are you okay? You've been staring at the sky for a while now.''

'' Iruka-sensei, how do you know if you love some one?'' the question surprised the chunin, not expecting such a question to come from Naruto.

'' why the sudden interest, got some one you like?'' Iruka took the opportunity to tease Naruto and to lighten the atmosphere slightly.

'' not really, I was just wondering.''

'' I can't say much as I've never been in a relation before but love comes in many forms. Familial love, love between friends, love for an activity and love between a couple. In a way, love can be just chemical reactions but it can also be something more. Love can be different for everybody as well. You have to find it for yourself.''

'' thank you Iruka-sensei. For all these years.'' as he said it, Naruto turned his head and flashed Iruka his signature smile.

''your welcome, Naruto. Remember, you can count on everybody here when your in trouble.'' seeing Naruto smile made Iruka smile back.

Their conversation came to a close and soon the sky was painted by streaks of white as shooting stars traveled across the night sky.

'' I don't want to be alone again. I want to have someone by my side for the years to come''

Unknown to Naruto, the beast which resides in him was also having love issues of her own.

Kurama was lying down on her back, hand raised up in front of her. She was still shocked at the sudden change, it was a bit too much for her to suddenly change forms. She was still not used to referring to herself as a she and much less used to the idea of love.

Did she even want to love? Yes. Yes she did, if not she would not have even agreed to change but who did she love, what is even love. Was it the rush of heat and the beating of the heart when Naruto had called her ' Someone precious'?

Could she even love Naruto? They were comrades, each others partner. Would it be right for the both of them to be in love with each other. Even if it was, would Naruto reciprocate her feeling?

What was her reason to even want to love?

Everything had a reason. It was something that Kurama believed in, there was a clear reason why she wanted to love. Something more than just a impulse, she did not do it on a whim. Was it because she wanted to give Naruto love? Something that would have been impossible otherwise.

She did not feel so, even she knew that most of it was just a cover up. There was something else at play, she was not the kind of person to do such a thing. She was far too shrewd to do it, there was something bigger at play that not even Kurama knew about.

That irked Kurama, she was used to being in control of herself, she knew what she was, what she hated and what she wanted to do but now, she did not know. She was turned into a female, her emotions was all over the place, the reason why she wanted such a change was lost to her, she did not know how to move forward and worst of all, she was falling for Naruto.

That was the only thing she was sure of. That she was falling for Naruto. The racing of her heart and the flushing of her face was not a coincidence, she was falling for Naruto. That was what she had believed with her rudimentary understanding of love.

Everything seemed to revolve around Naruto for some reason. She was sealed inside of Naruto, she had changed because of Naruto, Naruto had also a played in her decision to take the large change even if the part played was small, Naruto was also the one that was making her lose controls of her emotions as well.

She was at a loss. She was at a standstill with no where to go. All the cards laid out to her was not desirable. She could easily sweep her form change under the rug and pretend none of it happened or she could try to take a step forward into the dark and see where that path may lead. She did not want to do either, for fear of hurting herself on the latter or to abandon the chance given to her by Hagoromo-oji on the former.

She closed her eyes and let herself drift off, there was no point in overthinking things true. An image sprang to Kurama's mind as she had her eyes closed, a image of Naruto his trademark smile on his face with his right arm stretched out his hands in a fist.

'You're not the monster fox anymore. You're one of my teammates from Konoha' those words came to her mind as she saw the image. She felt a familiar rush of feelings, racing of the heart and flushing of the face. Even so, she was unsatisfied, she wanted more. Just being team-mates was not good enough. She wanted to be someone precious.

Her eyes shot open, she found her drive. She would take the step forward towards the dark path that she had not walked and see where it will lead her. She wanted something more from Naruto. If it leads her to the hidden reason then all the better if not, she would not fret over it. She had gotten a chance to love and she would make full use of it.

However, as one problem gets solved another takes its place.

How was Kurama going to return to her original form. After all, until she hopefully confesses to Naruto, she could not possibly stay in her female form and this was the problem faced by the lone female in the mindscape. A way to return to her original form.

And so far, her progress was basically non-existent. She had gotten no where closer to retrieving her original form.

'' Ahhhhhhhhhh! Why did Hagoromo-oji keep things so cryptic and complicated.'' she was close to pulling her hair out due to the fustrations she had faced.

All she knew so far was that she was a mental apparition supported through chakra mostly yin in nature. She was in essence like a genjutsu however unlike most genjutsus she could still interact with most things physically while in the mindscape. She still had mass and occupied space. She just needed to somehow make up enough matter to cover the difference in between a nine tailed mountain sized fox and a small female human. All which were easier said than done.

How does one make up such a large amount of matter. It is not like there exist a convenient and easily controlled substance in large amounts that she could use to magically conjure up a new body.

A convenient and easily controlled substance in large amounts.

'' How dumb am I?'' Kurama asked no one as she rested her head on her palm.

How could she have forgotten the most essential part of life and what she used to be mostly made of.

Chakra.

Looking at the large ball of chakra in front of her, with a simple thought the chakra flowed to her and soon she was encased in it. Soon the shroud grew in size and the beast which all people knew returned.

'' it's good to be back.'' she flexed her claws as the deep booming voice resonated through the room, a smile that showed of all her teeth on her face a smile which would give nightmares to event he strong minded people..

hi. I am back. After a really long break. And I can assure I had great reason other than pure utter laziness and extreme writers block. Reason which shall not be named. Also happy lunar new year. Its a bit late. Still. Happy holidays.

If you have not figured it out yet, the chapters are not in chronological order.

I am also really happy. The favorites and follow almost double I think. If this keeps up, I might even hit triple digits. Most likely not possible but a guy like me can dream can't I?

Well I really hope u enjoyed the chapter and any feedback or criticism or your own theories on what might be going on in the story is welcome is welcomed.

Guest(naruto): thanks for the review hope I can make this a good story not only for you but for others as well

Xerzo lotCN: now now I do think what I wrote was cute and somethings are better left till the end. I can't show all my cards now if not who would still read this story. Lets just say the unexplained or un-shown past of the tailed beast makes for great writing materials...As you can also see that hmm i'm also a weird guy so yes to all promises I cannot keep. ... you know i should also go to sleep (pulling another night shift)(its like 2 in the morning right now) i really should but I am suffering from stomach pain possibly hunger induced or maybe not. I am going to use the toilet.