The Little Sleeping Slices

by ghostdrunk

Jane's a grad student just trying to make ends meet and stay below the radar. Joker's a simple clown just trying to blow up Gotham University Library. Jane would rather he didn't, and that just tickles him to death. This could be fun. Joker/OC Batman/OC- rated M for violence, sex, and all the other stuff in the "M" rating category.

4. Rocket Science

Chapter Four: Rocket Science

-This chapter was inspired by the song "Rocket Science" by The Pimps- Do check it out!(if you want) I'll put a link on my profile

I had things I needed to catch up on. She's quite the diversion. Her words-all the small little gestures…they get all twisted up in my head. She's like a plant, a vine- A vine that takes over everything and chokes the other plants. In this case, those other plants were all the things I needed to think about and get done. She still gets herself all worked up about the most trivial things. Her stressors are all based on circumstance and the opinions of others. Poor thing, but I'm confident all of that nonsense will soon change. She'll come around. She's really above all that drivel. This connection of ours- It's a mutual understanding, esteem if you will. I get her. I see her. She does the same with me but is just too startled to express it. It's not often someone tunes into my station. But Janie, she knows what the psychiatric community has taken years on and off trying to comprehend. It's not like it's hard. I don't hide who I am. I hate that air of mystery people try to falsely obtain. They pretend to be so layered. They live under layers and layers of naught. They like to pretend they're mysterious, yet they flaunt themselves around. I get it, people want attention. But I'm so sick of those who try to be special. Most of them aren't. But she's not like that. Janie's the opposite. She tries her best not to draw attention. She doesn't want you to know it but there's a mystery there. There's actually something stimulating…She has the makings of a cold hearted drifter type. There's a hint of schizoid personality disorder- the loner in there too. Problem is she doesn't fully fit the mold of that because she feels. Oh she feels. It's a complicated and thoroughly captivating case this one. I'll get back to you soon with my results…

Apparently I'm not the only one who has noticed her. She caught the attention of the Commissioner, and even Batman. She didn't tell me about his little middle of the night visit. She's a better liar than she thinks. It only works though when she's casual about it. That's pretty much her in a nutshell…ha-ha. She's calm and casual most of the time as long as she doesn't have to make up something. She has no problem leaving things out. Yeah Bats apparently came to see her. I heard Gordon talking to his new Lieutenant about it over the radio on their own little channel…I don't know why cops still use that… The Lieutenant and his partner are the new cops that are parked in front of her complex by the way. He seems at odds with all cops except Gordon. He's what they might call a "good cop." He and Gordon talk on their own frequency…I wonder how long he'll remain in that "good cop" category? Apparently Bats didn't get any new information from her. They're using her to try to "get to me." It won't work. She already slipped and told me about it. I don't like when they use people. I use people to make a point but I don't use them to get to others or to get info. Well, that's a complete lie. I do it all the time. But I don't like that they're trying to use her. She's not a pawn, she's not their little informant…she's not theirs! It's a good thing she's too smart for them. It's a good thing she has a hot little temper. She wasn't taken with the man in black. She likes men that wear color, men that don't hide behind a black cloak. She likes me.

Listen to me gushing… I've already gone off in my head about her again…but who can blame me? Well, no one since I'm alone. And I'd definitely give anyone that wanted to blame me a piece of my mind…Just not the piece where I think about her… But I needed to work. Focus, focus… A new problem had recently come to my attention- a copycat. I didn't know who he was. But it was all over the news last night. He'd killed a couple of women outside of a night club. When he was done with them he painted them up to look like me. They had smeared black around their eyes and red lipstick across their faces. Ugh, I get that the guy wants to kill but he needs to be original. He left a little Joker's card and on the back wrote "whose next?" First of all… "Whose?" Was he serious? It's "who's." The second problem was that he was holding a third one for ransom. He'd released a video to the news around the same time they found the bodies. She was tied up, all frightened and shaking. She was gagged and was holding cue cards. The first one read "who will pay my ransom?" She dropped it. The second one said "17,000 cash by midnight Thursday or I lose my life." The news went on to say that there was an address for the drop off for the money but police weren't releasing it. Good old media-they'd put up a video of a woman being held hostage but dismissed the notion anyone watching could possibly help. How comical…

This didn't make any sense. I get the fun of the mystery but why money? It's always about money for these people. Everyone always wants money. It's hilarious because it's so easily obtained. I don't understand how something so easily obtained can be such a precious commodity? Why not pursue something rare, something odd? - Something like a little red headed butcher. I have no patience for people with no ingenuity. I didn't like this one bit, it was embarrassing and sloppy. I never doddle over the details but this was absolute malarkey.

I had been so busy with blowing up the schools and making Janie's mix tape that I hadn't even noticed this had transpired. Someone was trying to get my attention. Someone wanted something from me. The guy, this copycat was a ghost. He didn't go on camera in the video. In fact, the video barely had any sound aside from the girl whimpering. Which should have been another clue it wasn't me…I'm in my videos. I watched it a few times. She was looking around in various directions. This led me to believe that there was more than one person in the room when they taped it.

Things weren't adding up. I have a theory about this though- my copycat doesn't exist. Well, he exists but he's deliberately being a mimic. This is just a method to draw me out. Who would want to draw me out? Well, lots of people. I certainly have more enemies then friends. This was most likely orchestrated by the mob. I'd have to be more specific. But I was pretty sure that's what it was. I made a few adversaries by burning up all that money-that and not killing Batman. After all, that's what they'd hired me for. But I couldn't kill Bats. They were boring and he was interesting. They were too scared to outwardly challenge me. That's why they hired whoever this guy was. There was the odd chance it could also be some crazy, someone trying to get my attention out of affection. But I doubted it. I wasn't amused either way. There could be other villains, there could even be other clowns but there could only be one of me. Anyone that wasn't a complete idiot could see inconsistencies. I've never asked for money from the public. It wasn't their pocketbooks I wanted. I wanted them to open their eyes and see. Maybe I had too much faith that the public would see past this though…People liked to compartmentalize things too much. It's the only way their small minds can make sense of things. Everything had to go into little boxes; everything had to be understood to go in their little drawers or compartments. Things aren't that simple. There's always a bigger picture. There is an undying energy that is existence. It can't be understood as one thing. It certainly can't be organized. It is chaos. It exists. It's energy. It's simply happening. But I digress…or do I? What Gotham must think of me now they've seen this little news reel… My goodness I probably look like a softy. That won't do. I had a repute to uphold. I didn't really care…but then again I did. But if this indeed was a trap I'd have to be covert in my investigation because the objective of this little project was most likely my head on a platter or plate, whichever.

The easiest route would be to get info from the police. There were plenty of mob informants working as policeman. I had a several contacts in all the departments. The problem with them was that they were my contacts via the mob bosses. They wouldn't give me much info being their bosses were the ones trying to off me. I could infiltrate the policemen. I could get info and such, but I had a little trouble finding recruits that were my own that could actually make it as law enforcement. See my guys usually had a bit of a background working against the cops. And for this I'd have to use my own guys and get to the bottom of this a different way.

I'd take care of the mob…whoever it was particularly…or all of them. I didn't care. They needed to be brought down a notch. While I did that someone else could find my impersonator. I had just the man for the job. I'd ask Blaine. Blaine was the most dependable crazy I'd ever worked with. He was a devout religious nut. He was into whipping himself and stuff like that. He had marks all over his body-mainly his back and shoulders from various leather belts or whips. Blaine had this compulsion for killing cops and all types of law enforcement. He believes them all to be crooked and corrupt. In Gotham, he was half right, but singling out one profession of people to kill just isn't just. That and he only kills when encouraged. Blaine disciplines himself for these homicidal acts by whipping his body. It's pure masochism if you ask me but I don't think he's asking. And as long as he does what I ask I really don't care.

I could usually find him at the big Catholic Church on 24th. This is because Blaine is a priest. His confessional was always empty. Most people would deliberately avoid him inside and outside of the confessional. You're not supposed to know who you're confessing to but people get wind of things. I didn't have that problem. I wasn't Catholic. Nor am I religious in any way. I wasn't afraid of the big, bad priest that was scary because of all his scars and creepy slit-like eyes. It was a quiet morning, about three. No one was around. I made it to the church and dropped my happy self into the confessional and started yapping.

"Forgive me father for I have sinned. When I was five I stole my father's wallet and snuck into a dirty movie. That's where I saw my first…"

"If you go that far back, we'll never get to the real reason why you're here." Blaine interjected- A priest who was a pragmatist go figure.

"I need your help getting some information."

Blaine sighed. I could see him through the flimsy screen. He was probably in his late forties. Well, if he was younger you couldn't tell. His scars were all over his face and body. They made him look like an aged meth addict with slightly effeminate features. Though I doubt he did drugs. His hair was pale orange and gray. He was balding a bit on the top. He was around 5'7, a little guy not that built and skinnier than a rail. Not a very attractive man, but unattractive men can serve their purpose. When not cloaked as a priest, he was quite the chilling figure. He looked too crazy for anyone to mess with. "What kind of information?" He asks me.

"There's a copycat out there. Someone is using my panache and killing some girls. I need you to figure out who it is and who hired them to do it."

"Why would I help you find some copycat?"

"I think the cops are behind it. They're trying to draw me out…" I paused. "By killing innocent girls…" It was easy to play on crazies' emotions. You just had to figure out what made them tick. The typical serial killer sees black and white. There is no room for the in-between. It's no different with this one. He saw policeman as evil and everyone else good. He didn't feel the need to justify killing them. He had no remorse for it. "Since you're so good at sniffing the cops out, I thought you perfect for the job."

"Swine," He seethed. "…The whole lot of them." He brought up his hand and pulled back the screen-no need for pretense anymore. "Do you know which ones did it?"

"Well I know they're working with a big crime syndicate somehow-one of the big families. You could get answers from them." It's funny he had no problem with organized crime.

"Those sinners, there's no hope for them. But the cops should know better. Judges 5:8 says – "When new gods were chosen, then war was in the gates. Was shield or spear to be seen among forty thousand in Israel?"

I wasn't paying attention to what he was saying. I was bored. This was boring. I didn't understand why I needed to give someone I used as an informant so much information. It was a little redundant. I thought about Janie. I wondered what she was doing right now. I wanted to hang out with her. I wondered what she thought of my mix tape. She liked it. She'd probably give me an ambiguous answer when I asked her about it though. Janie sees a lot of grey and tries to handle life as such. That's good. It's only reasonable. I wouldn't say I saw things grey though, nor do I see them in black and white…maybe purple, red, or green.

I tried to picture in my mind what she looked like when she was working. She was undoubtedly sexy as a butcher- I could fancy her thrusting that cleaver up and down. She probably cut that meat into perfect little slices. Blood would be all over her gloves. She'd be tired from a long day's work. I could see strands of that angry red hair falling upon her face, trying to escape whatever she used to hold it back… I had to shake myself out of it. This was a church confessional I was sitting in. And the homicidal priest was asking me a question.

"Come again?"

"I said do you know where I need to go to get the info?"

"Yeah, there's this club, the girls were found outside of-GQ. It's owned by some Italians. They're the ones targeting…they're the ones working with the cops." Almost slipped there…

"The cops…they go to this club? The ones you think killed those girls?"

"That or the men they hired to kill those girls." I had to cover my tracks, because the cops most likely weren't involved in this. But Blaine didn't know that. His mind was too clouded with bloodlust. I could see it in his little beady eyes. The coercion was almost too easy. That's often true with serial killers. The urge to kill, it's like an unquenchable thirst. Killing a person will quell their darkness temporarily, but it will always return.

-Let me be clear; I'm not a serial killer. By definition I could be, but it's not that simple. In my formative years I studied book after book of psychology. I was sure I'd figure myself and everyone else around me out. Not to toot my own horn, but I've found out a long time ago that I'm a special case. It doesn't make me better it just makes me different. I don't have to kill if I don't feel like it. Or I can kill if I feel like it. It just so happens that most of the time I do simply because it's fun. It's a thrill, a gaff to break the mundane lull of the day-to-day. I have control over my impulses but I don't have control over what kind of mood I'll be in. Life is random and erratic. No one can predict what's going to happen. But I'm pretty good at guessing. Just like now, I'd assumed and guessed correctly that Blaine or Father Blaine would be apt to helping me.

"I'll go tonight. Do you want me to call or text you to let you know what I find out?"

"I'll be close by if something goes awry-me and my men. We might even show up but naturally we won't be having a drink together. Contact me when you find something out."

"This night-club, it sounds expensive."

I rolled my eyes. Even the priest wants money! "I'll be sure to reimburse what you spend."

"Fine," He sat back upright on his wooden bench. "Say five our-fathers, and…"

I wasn't going to stay for him to finish. It was hypocritical for him to say that. Especially since he didn't let me voice my confession. People I tell you…

…

The snow from last night was all black and dirty now. The sky remained cloudy and kept all the cold in. Not that it would go away soon but the snow usually melted after a few days. It just remained there like a wet dog or blanket. It was like a reminder. It was worried we'd forget its eminent threat to snow hell of a lot more. We didn't need to be reminded of that…silly snow. This would be a bitter winter. How I loved it…

Like most mornings around four the trash men were making their rounds. I hitched a ride on the back of one for a few blocks. I popped off and headed back toward my place. It was too cold to be outside for extended amounts of time. Despite the temperature, I was all hot and bothered. It was so frustrating- I had all this stuff to do but when did I get a break? All work and no play make me a dull boy- and I only wanted to play with Janie. She wasn't at work, they weren't open yet. I changed my course and walked by to get a look at the place. An overweight Italian was there taking a shipment. I wasn't going to bother him. I have no qualms with the butcher. That is, unless he dated Janie or something but from the looks of it there was no way. And Janie might get mad if I did. She might be out of a job. And I really liked the idea of her being a butcher.

She wasn't at the school cause; well I blew it up and burned it down. She was most likely at home, at her apartment. It was still very early. She'd probably be in bed. I got around her neighborhood around five fifteen. The new cops were "guarding the outside." I'd have to go in somewhere other than the front. I slipped in the back of the parking garage. - I often rely on people's laziness. In this particular case, I assumed they hadn't reinstalled the security footage for the garage yet. I assumed correctly. I took the elevator to her floor, and walked right in. It was too easy. If there actually was a threat towards her, she definitely wasn't safe. The cops were lazy and stupid. Blaine wouldn't be happy. He'd probably kill the cops out front for being negligent, ha. That wasn't a bad idea…

I'd briefly forgotten which one was hers, then I remembered-27-6. I thought about knocking but she'd been stubborn last night with her trying to break up with me and all. She probably wouldn't answer and she possibly might alert the cops. I picked the lock and opened the door carefully. All the lights were out. It was pretty dark. The curtains were drawn and all I could hear was the hum of the heater. To the right was the kitchen and the left, the living room. It was nice and cozy- the kind of couch one could really relax on. Her bedroom was straight ahead. She had the door cracked open a bit, but mainly shut. I pulled it open and walked through.

Her bed was an amiable size, a full or a queen. I couldn't tell. She had this thick extremely cushy red comforter. Pillows were scattered everywhere. A yellow blanket was draped across it as well. It had a black frame- very stylish, very stylish indeed. Problem was she wasn't in it. I sat down on it for a second, how perplexing. Her bathroom was in her bedroom, and it was open with no sign of her there either. I walked to the window and peered outside. Her bodyguards were sitting there idly, none the wiser. Where had she gone? I'd say it was impressive she'd evaded the cops but, it's not like it's hard with Gotham's finest on the job…

I was a little heated. I was looking forward to seeing what she looked like sleeping…to see her hair all messy. I loved her hair. It was pretty every time I saw it. But every time it was also just a little bit disheveled…like supermodel-photo-sex-hair. She's confident enough where she doesn't try so hard, that's sexy. I took off my jacket and shoes and stretched out on her bed. It smelled good. It smelled like her-clean and sweet. Her heater kept her place warm. I clung to her soft comforter and closed my eyes.

…

I hadn't imagined it, her front door had opened and shut. I got up and sifted through the shadows of the apartment. It was dark, but I assume she was used to it because she didn't turn on any lights. She sat her keys on the counter and went to the kitchen. She poured herself a glass of water and took her hair down. It had been pulled back. She was wearing an army-green jacket. She really liked the color green- She'd obviously been working out. She had earphones on. I could hear the noise bleeding out from them.

I walked closer and the floor creaked. She wouldn't hear it. Well, that previous statement was wrong. She tensed up and grabbed a knife from her collection. There were several cutting knifes in a holder next to her stove. Okay it takes a lot to genuinely scare me but I swear I actually jumped a little. No lie- she took the knife and threw it in my direction like a ninja or something. I moved over in the nick of time. "Nick" really wasn't the word for it. More like jab. The knife landed firmly in the wall next to me. Poor wall…

"Who are you?" She demanded to know as she grabbed another knife and walked towards me.

"Did you sync the CD I made you onto your MP3 player?"

She evaded the question and put her earphones in her pocket. "What are you doing here?"

"I came to visit you."

"You weren't invited."

"It was a spontaneous visit."

She stared in silence for a second.

"You gonna put the knife down?" I laughed a bit. Maybe it wasn't good to laugh, but it's in my nature to laugh under several different circumstances.

A few seconds later she lowered it and put it back in its slot. She walked past me and yanked the other one from the wall.

"Where did you learn to do that? Some uh…" I fluttered my tongue. My mouth was suddenly very dry. "…Martial arts self-defense class?"

She sighed as she took her coat off. "Leave Joker, I'm tired."

What an interesting reason for me to leave…She didn't seem alarmed or fretful just annoyed. "If you're tired let's go to bed."

"You're not getting in my bed."

I already had. "Oh I see the temptation is just too great."

"Stop it; tell me why you're here."

"I've told you, I came to visit. If you're so tired why weren't you already in bed?"

She shrugged and sat on the couch. "I couldn't sleep."

This was interesting. "Got a lot on your mind Janie girl?" I propped next to her.

"Yes but," She stopped. This was getting easier. I'd already got down to the personal stuff. "Look, I don't need to discuss this with you…you have no right to be here leave."

"It's too late to act anxious now." I propped down beside her. "You're at least half excited to see me."

"I'm not."

"You are."

"Look, I really do need to get some sleep. I have work tomorrow and I intend to spend today resting."

"You don't look tired to me."

She gave me a strange look, she even smiled slightly. It was the kind of smile you like to get from a woman. "That's weird because everyone…" She shook her head. "Never mind… get out."

I growled a bit. "Oh come on, what if I don't have anywhere else to go?"

"That's not my problem."

"Ouch, aren't we cold and heartless. What about brotherly love?"

"I think that's Philadelphia."

"And this is Gotham?" I laughed. "Is that you're point?" I moved a little closer. "Well, at least we agree we're all morally bankrupt."

"I'm not morally bankrupt; I'm just not going to let you stay here. If a little puppy was in my apartment I might feel differently."

"Fine, fine, I'll leave you be."

She nodded. "Thank you."

I went to her room and got the yellow blanket and a pillow. I brought it back into the living room. She eyed me curiously. "What are you doing?"

"You told me to go."

"I meant leave entirely."

"Oh, you're just trying to keep a strong resolve. I'll stay out here for now."

"Haven't we been through this?"

"Yes," I simply replied. "So what did you think of the mix tape?"

"Don't try and change the subject."

"It was worth a shot."

"Leave."

"You're crossing your arms in an attempt to show me you are closed off. But it's all about the body language-so unnatural. I'm telling ya, you don't want me to leave."

"Must you try to read into everything?"

"Sure I do. That is until you start being honest with yourself. No one knows I'm here. The cops are pretty inept if they didn't even check in to see if you were gone…Now, is it really going to kill ya to spend some time with me?"

"That's a feasible assumption." She got up and started pacing. Janie was all worked up again.

My response was stopped by a knock on the door. – "Miss Archer?"

Janie looked through the peephole. She cursed under her breath. I looked through. It was one of the cops supposed to look after her. Well, talk about irony. She looked at me. I started to laugh but she shook her head.

"No!" She mouthed.

"Miss Archer?"

Janie grabbed my hand and pulled me back into her bedroom. "Oh so now I'm allowed back here?" I voiced as I was pushed into the bathroom.

"Just, stay here and don't make any noise?" She whispered as she started to take off her clothes.

I tilted my head. I was both excited and confused. "What are you doing?"

"Just a second…" She called to the policeman and started taking her pants off. She was standing right in front of me.

"He's going to come in here and check the apartment." She reached to turn the shower on.

"How do you know?"

"The only time they come up is to check the apartment."

"What, so we're going to take a shower?"

"No, I'm going to make it look like I was." And there went her shirt…it was replaced with a towel that wrapped around her. She was wearing a nice black bra whose straps were lowered and tucked into the towel. It was all I could do not to grab her and…"He won't check in the bathroom because he'll be distracted. You have to get in the shower and hide."

"Such tenacity! Have you done this before?" I was thoroughly charmed.

"No, I'm just not about to take any chances." Janie took another towel and wrapped her hair in it. "Now get in the shower." She started for the door. I took her arm to stop her and turned her towards me.

"If you don't want to; take your chances of jumping out the window." Her voice was indifferent. She stared me straight in the eyes…I had to kiss her. I grabbed her chin and pulled her to me. She moaned slightly as she pushed herself away and headed for the door. She glanced back at me; I threw up my arms and headed for the bathroom.

…

Well the plan had worked. The cop apologized repeatedly. He kept saying that somebody had called to report someone was lurking in the parking garage. She explained that it was her. He chided her a bit for leaving without notifying them. She apologized half-heartedly promising she'd just needed a brief walk and she stayed at the complex. He went on to say he just wanted to check the locks on the windows and such. He did this quickly and cleared his throat in embarrassment. He soon left.

I didn't wait for her to come get me. She was too angry with me to do that. I emerged to find her in her bedroom pulling on some clothes. Her long sleeve thermal and shorts were cute, but she didn't need to get dressed on my account.

"I didn't see where kept your towels." That was a lie, I'd saw her take them out earlier, but I really like getting a rise out of her. It's becoming one of my favorite pastimes.

She walked behind me to the bathroom and got two towels from a cabinet. She walked back in front of me, trying not to look or acknowledge the fact I was practically naked. "Here." Her voice was quick and deliberate. She sighed a little. "Look even though your being here is your fault, I'm not an impolite person. I didn't want to be rude to you."

I didn't understand why she was apologizing. Though I assumed it was engrained at some point in her life to carry the unnecessary burden of guilt. "You shouldn't apologize for that."

"Yes I should. There's no excuse for being brash."

"Really?" I pondered this. "Then I have an awful lot of apologies to make." Someone was checking me out now. I raised my brow and grinned. "Please Janie, I'm a respectable guy." I wrapped a towel around my waist.

"So, somehow you're stuck here."

"How fortuitous."

"I'm not going to go to jail just because you broke in."

I smirked.

"I can, I'll put your clothes in the dryer."

"Aren't you a sweetheart?" I went to grab them and handed them to her. She weighed them in her hands. "You'll have to take out all of your…weapons.

I chuckled then followed her to the kitchen bar to disarm. She watched this with great interest. But mostly she just stared at me. I hadn't looked in the mirror but I'm sure my face had come off some. Curious, curious little Janie…

"I was right." She started.

"About what?"

"Your hair, it's brown." She spoke as if she was talking to herself.

"Oh you learned my secret. It's not naturally green."

She smiled a little. She was more relaxed now. Now that she was forced to spend time with me. Oh me oh my.

The dryer was in the corner of her kitchen. It wasn't a very convenient place. But having your own dryer in Gotham is quite the luxury.

"Okay," She started. "I'm going to sleep. You can watch T.V. I guess." She threw up her arms. She was so flustered.

"That's it?" I teased.

"Uh, yeah pretty much."

"Did you listen to my mix tape?"

"Yes." She crossed her arms again.

"…and? Be honest I don't want you lying to me."

She pursed her lips. "It was a nice gesture, I guess. No one's ever made me a mix tape before."

I doubted that. "Well did you listen to it?"

She nodded. I shrugged.

"It started off entertaining."

"Started off?"

"Yes, but it quickly got," She paused. "Disturbing."

"Disturbing?"

"That's right."

"Well good. You understood what I was going for-my motif."

"If your goal was to creep me out then yes I totally got that theme."

"I didn't creep you out." Now I crossed my arms. "You knew every song."

"They're all very intense…considering." She was being ambiguous…what did I tell you?

"I woke you up."

"Woke me up?"

"That's right. To the fact that you and I, we're…"

"I'm still not entirely woken up. I'm going to bed." She slyly remarked and went back to her room.

"Cute Janie," I shook my head and started to explore. The light of the early day was shining in. And I was too energized to sleep. I guessed she wasn't sleeping either but I'd give her some time to pretend.

…

I'd gone through all of her DVR. She didn't watch much TV. All she recorded was Anthony Bourdain back in December. I watched an episode, a special on him going to Chile. He was a fun guy who had a way with words. He was also blessed with a very easy job. After that I flipped to the news. There were no leads to my whereabouts and the girl that I was supposedly holding ransom was killed. This was an interesting development. My copycat was upping his game. Killing her before the deadline was unpredictable. I'm unpredictable. He was trying to look more like me. I shut her TV off. She had some DVD's but I didn't want to watch a movie unless I watched it with her. I wandered to the kitchen and opened the cabinets. She had gone shopping recently. Everything was new.

"Janie, can I eat some of your food?" I called out. I wasn't going to ask but I wasn't going to miss an opportunity to bother her. She didn't answer. I shook my head and pulled out some cereal.

…

It was nine o' clock now. I was bored. My mood was starting to dampen. All of her really personal stuff was in her room. She didn't have any personal pictures hanging in her living room I could take. There was only a decorative painting and a couple of books. I suddenly remembered; I hadn't given her the library books yet. I'd have to save that for another time when she wasn't so touchy. Today would not be that day. Which was fine, I enjoyed her temper. I went to the dryer and pulled out my pants. I pulled them up, zipped and buttoned. I headed for her room and opened the door.

"You don't have to get up." I told her and leaned beside her on the bed.

Her eyes slowly opened as she growled angrily. The light from the window made her hair shine.

She was lying on her side facing me. "Oh that's right, you broke into my apartment."

"I didn't want to wake you."

"Then why are you talking and hovering over me?"

"Every guy likes to watch his girl sleep."

"I'm not your girl."

"Whatever you say..."

"Don't you sleep? I need sleep, I'm going back to sleep."

"Alright then…" I hopped over her body on the opposite side of the bed.

She was a little more awake now. "What are you doing?"

"It's not all about me, if sleep is so important to you…" I crawled in beside her.

She pulled the comforter over her head. "No, no no…" She spoke. The sound of her voice was muffled as she sunk under. I went under as well. We were in our own little world-Under the covers, nice and warm…

"This is a comfy bed."

"Yes, now get out of it!" She rolled over towards me.

"Give me one good reason."

She furrowed her brows. "You're getting make up on my pillows."

I laughed. She was so witty. "Do you really want me to leave?"

"Absolutely, leave my apartment!"

"I would see, but the police are looking for me. And you don't want them to know I'm here or I was here."

"At this point I don't care."

"Oh yes you do." She was so damn cute.

"Aren't you tired of this arguing? Can't you find some girl that wants to be with you?"

"Where's the fun in not arguing? But you do want to. You're just too stubborn. You're having trouble leaving your safe little station in life. It's too scary." I could see her a little bit. But as I said the comforter was really thick. I moved my hands around to find her. She swatted them away.

"You're right. It's definitely an obstacle. One I'm not going to get past."

"Why don't you kiss me?"

"No."

"Fine, I'll kiss you then." I leaned forward and wrapped my arms around her. But she slithered out of them. She hopped out of the bed. She knew I didn't want to just kiss her. Kissing her was nice. But I could think of things that would be much nicer. I got up and went towards her. I guess I looked like I was ready to pounce because she looked like she was ready to fight right back.

"You need to get out now." She wasn't smiling. She wasn't joking. I took a breath to cool myself down. "You're a bad idea" She shook her head.

"What, you can't trust me? Or is it you can't trust yourself?"

She shrugged and threw up her arms. "Both."

I was surprised by her honesty. I'd barely realized we'd moved into the kitchen. She was pulling the rest of my clothes out of the dryer. She held them in her arms out towards me. I stared at them, then her for a second. I finally took them.

"We really need to work on this little problem of ours." I started to put on the rest of my clothes and re-arm myself.

"Why can't you just leave me alone?"

"I like you too much."

"If you love something, let it go."

"Who said anything about love?" I chuckled. "We both know this isn't love. That's not what made you jump out of bed. That's not why you're afraid of being around me." I buttoned up my vest and rolled up my sleeves. "This is so beyond," I clenched my jaw as I put on my jacket. "This is so much deeper. It's like…I can feel you without touching you, your energy..."

She stared back at me. Her head was slightly lowered. But we'd locked eyes a while back. She hadn't broken the stare and neither had I. She looked like a predator. There was something so feral, so wild about her. That is, until she started laughing. It wasn't a chuckle, or a scoff. She was full out laughing. She walked up to me and put her hand on the small of my back. She guided me to the front door and opened it.

"Get out Joker." She smiled. I wasn't quite sure what had happened, but I'm pretty sure I was just beaten at my own game. But perhaps she was a little closer to losing her resolve, so close that all she could do was laugh.

"What are you doing tonight Janie?"

She shook her head.

"I'm going to pick you up at one." It would only take one more time. I was sure of it. Tonight would be it.

"Look as I've said before I like you…I like your company." She quickly corrected. "I'm so messed up for saying that…but unfortunately for you I like myself more."

"Come out with me tonight. If by tomorrow if you haven't come to your senses…or been honest with yourself, with me…"

"Then you'll leave me alone?"

I was a little bit startled for a moment. There was no way I would agree to that. I gave her the smallest nod I could muster. A nod could mean anything.

She took a breath. "That's tempting- Anything to get you the hell out of my life."

"Geez, you don't have to lay it on so thick!"

"Give me an address. I'll meet you there if I decide to go.

"Oh you better come. It will be so boring without you." I walked to the dry erase board on her fridge. I wrote down the address to the club. I'd for sure go if she was going. "We'll meet up outside here and do something afterwards." I was scheduling things a bit close but that was fine. I needed to make time for my personal life. "If you come early and go in…you'll get a chance to see your guy in action. It's going to get rough though so it would probably be best to pretend you don't know me until I come to you."

"I don't understand why you think I would risk being seen somewhere with you. Evading you in public is a natural assumption. I don't have a death wish. Nor do I want to be locked up in jail."

"You're such a meanie…Don't worry, the good cops don't go there."

She looked at the address, her eyes widened. "Why on earth would you want to go there? Are you…friends with them?"

I gave her a squinted look. "How would you know who owns that club?"

She smiled. "You didn't answer my question."

"I have some business with them."

"What kind of business?"

"So you're suddenly interested in my activities?" She just stared. But I was more than happy to tell her. "They ticked me off Janie. And I'm going to have a chat with their head-honcho or whatever he calls himself. Some…copyright infringement issues."

"I don't understand."

"That's because you don't watch the news."

"Why would you want to invite me to a place where I could get hurt? - Where you're most likely going to get hurt."

"Trust me; we're not the party that will be getting hurt. And you'll just be a bystander."

"But they're dangerous."

"What's wrong? I know you're not worried about me… Are you afraid? I won't let anything happen to you."

She rolled her eyes. "That's a popular promise…How about I don't let anything happen to me?"

I shrugged. "I'll just be your backup then."

…

I doubted she'd come. I wanted her to, but it was fine that she didn't. That way she wouldn't give me flack for not keeping up my promise to leave her alone. Oh yeah, I decided to go to the club for sure…I needed to entertain myself. If Janie wasn't coming I wasn't going to sit around and wait for Blaine to call. That was boring, boring and desperate. But I knew I couldn't show up in the club this early. Blaine would be doing his research and people weren't near inebriated enough. It didn't take long to figure out who owned this club. I suddenly realized how unnecessary it was to even investigate. This was all Maroni's doing. Leave it to the dodgy Italian. He'd done me in and revealed my plans to the Commissioner. Who would have thought- a mobster with a conscience and boundaries? I was getting tired of all these surprises and inconsistencies in people's characters. I admired his betrayal in a way. It was bold, but on the flipside it was cowardly. He couldn't try to face me himself. Luckily, Harvey, two-face faced him. Ha, see what I did there? Well he got banged up a little in a little accident. Maroni flew from the vehicle. He walks with a limp now and had to have skin grafted from his leg to save his face. His jaw had to be realigned. Needless to say he's not the pretty boy he used to be. But I digress. What I was getting at was he's had it out for me ever since. It's some strange crusade of his since the cops and Arkham couldn't keep me down it's somehow his responsibility. Once again; since when did Mobsters dwell out justice? Well, justice is a loose term. Maroni didn't really care about justice. He cared about his repertoire. The girls were murdered at his club. He knew a little more about my M.O. than the general public. Thirdly, he knew this would tick me off. I wasn't like him and all his pals. I didn't want money and I didn't kill people without putting myself in the spotlight a little. I'm a performer. That was part of who I am.

Blaine texted me around midnight saying there were no cops but he thinks he has a lead. Some guys were talking about the murdered girls. I wanted to see for myself, but it was still too early. I'd have to wait for a little bit longer.

I'm no idiot. I brought men with me tonight. We'd have to take the club and corner Maroni. -Maroni and the guy he hired to imitate me, I had a bone to pick with him as well, or several. I'll bet he was banking on me showing up eventually. This could have been a trap but I had a few tricks of my own. And besides, I wanted to get this house cleaning out of the way. The club bouncers were big fellas. They were no nonsense but somehow not above bribery. Now that was consistent to their stereotypical character. I liked that.

One of them told me Maroni's men were a little heavier tonight…hmm…that there were five that followed him and three on the exits. There was one by the bar incognito in a blue pinstripe suit. Geez, it all was a little overkill if you ask me. Nine of them total. That's a nice number, but not as good as six. He gave me a general layout of the club, and even agreed to plant a few surprises in it…

We were congregated up in a van a few blocks down. There were seven of us, including me. I really liked the number six. I liked to always have six men. It had never let me down before. It was very symmetrical. In the event that something went wrong, I'd be the seventh man. I'd blend in and get the hell out of dodge…If they all died, well…then I'd just get six more.

I don't like group things though. They were all talking up a storm. They asked me various questions that I didn't want to listen to or answer. They only needed the instructions I gave them. I wasn't in the mood for talkative henchmen. I even thought about killing the one sitting to my left. He wouldn't stop yapping. But I needed my six, I liked my six. Maybe he'd get shot. I'd take joy in seeing that happen. No my mind was once again pervaded with thoughts of Janie. She had burst into laughter. She was losing her grip. But that laugh meant several things. One, she was resigning herself to the fact this wasn't one sided. Yeah she'd voiced it. But her laugh was more like accepting it a bit. I'm not going to waste my time on a girl that doesn't like me back. I'm not a masochist. I have no interest in torturing myself. Though I would have a seriously hard time after knowing her, to just giving up if she was never interested. Her laugh was also for catharsis. She couldn't let herself give in. She's too stubborn. I like that, but it's frustrating simultaneously. But what's a relationship if not torture? I'll be the first to admit I have some rather, dark intentions. If she wasn't who she was, I'd of broken her. I'd of kept her around for a while even if she was weak of mind and spirit. I would have, used her. It's easy to use people after a "trauma" like witnessing the bombing of one's school and chatting up and making out with a so called "terrorist." But not Janie, she couldn't be penetrated like that. Things that bother the masses don't bother her. Not in the same way anyways. Sure, she's troubled because she likes me. I'm a complicated guy, if you're genuinely into me there's something a little off about you. I'm just being honest. But there was the mystery. She liked me because she recognized herself in me somehow, we clicked. There's something dark in her that made her- shall we say predisposed to my charm. It made her somehow like me. Whatever it was gave her the ability to identify it in both of us. But whatever that is, it also makes her strong. She can like me, she can want me, but I can't control her. She's going to do what she wants to do. I don't like that. But I do. I still don't know if I like it. Because that makes me hers as much as she'd be mine. This wasn't something I was accustomed to. I didn't ever care what other people wanted. But I did with her. I wanted her as elated as I was. I just wanted her. I wanted her to let me have her. I wasn't used to this. What a conundrum. I just like using that word. I'll bet she uses it in her diary. Though I don't think she has one… I'd never met a girl like her though. Hopefully this relationship would evolve. She's delightful but she can't be that different. Eventually, hopefully I would break her. If not, I'd probably be sorry because there was always the chance she'd sail me up the river. She reacts to things in her interest and self-preservation. That's a little reckless for a so-called normal citizen. She also seems to lack empathy. Now, it might have been different if someone she loved was with her. If I threatened say her and her sister she might have operated contrarily. But who knows if she even has a sister. I don't care about her sister…

Blaine called me. He'd killed a cop, but the cop turned out not to be involved in this. Ha, but he found the place where the third girl was murdered. There was a back room with blood stains on the floor; he recognized it from the tape. Well that was gross. Why hadn't they cleaned that up yet? It's a place of business! I did need to wait a bit longer though. Things would unfold in due time…

I kept a sharp eye on the entrance. There was no sign of her. She wouldn't come. She wanted to. A part of me thought she'd also come as an attempt to get me to leave her alone. But she really needed some excitement. Young people well, interesting people in general shouldn't waste their time working and studying. It's not natural. With me, excitement was a guarantee. I thought I'd saw her once or twice but they were just normal girls. Maybe I'd drop by her apartment later and we'd have some coffee or sex or something…

I went in the club about one-thirty. It was dark and noisy. It was also pretty gargantuan. But I was very perceptive. I eyed the exits and the three men guarding them. I told my men to stay in pairs. Two of them would go along and get rid of the exit guards. Two of them would find Mr. Undercover at the bar. And the other two would stay behind me. I was important enough. I needed bodyguards too.

Whenever I go out, I always get looks from people. It's usually ones of horror and fright. Don't make me laugh I think to myself. I could care less about all of them. Baaaaaaaa…They say a sheep will kill over if you simply yell at it or scare it a bit. I think the same is true for most humans. They'll fall over in fear if you simply look at them the wrong way. Yeah I caused a little attention. Some people are surprisingly still sober. Most of them think I'm not the real me though. That instead I'm wearing a costume. I blame TV and movies and video games. It's all the CGI and special effects. People's suspension of disbelief has lessened in recent times. They're willing to believe less and less even when they see it with their own eyes. Some of them even want to give me a high-five for my excellent costume. Whatever…

I scan the exits again. Two of them are clear. My guys work fast. They're on their way to the third. I can't tell if bar-man has been taken out but he will be soon. I'm already joined by my exit men. They've finished the job already. So efficient! Tonight I'd picked ones all from prison. I have to be careful in my selection. These were some of my buddies from violent crimes. They knew how to get the job done. I see no sign of Blaine…but he's a slight fellow and could very easily get lost in a crowd.

Maroni's VIP section was on the right. The music was awful. Janie and I didn't like this…if she was here. I'm sure this place was over capacity it was very crowded. Kudos for him for having such a popular club though! That was easy though for mobsters. They liked to have a lot of "family" around. Loyalty to them was loyalty to your own neck in these parts. As long as you played their game- you got to keep your neck. Too bad I'm not like that. No, I'm an equal opportunity offender. This goes back to the killing conversation we had earlier. Yeah Maroni had several friends, lots of people for his flock. I barely saw his slightly disfigured face sitting down at a corner round table. He had a broad with him and of course his five men. We got two of them almost immediately. He gave me a frightened look. This pleased me. At least he had the good sense to know I was angry. I sat down next to him as my guys finished his guys off

"Candi, will you give us a little privacy?" I looked at the woman sitting next to him. Her mouth hung agape. That was a good place to put a bullet…

She stared at me in fright. "I, my name is Kelsey."

"Isn't that what I said?"

She looked at Maroni for a second. He gestured for her to leave. She got up and jetted off.

"Well she was nice." I straightened my jacket. "How's it going, I hear you've recently been in an accident. How you holding up?"

He decided to straighten his own jacket. He was going to play this cool. "Not bad,"

"I like what you did with the face, gives you that deformed mobster look all the big-shots aim for."

He pursed his lips. He was cornered literally and figuratively. There really was nothing he could say, but he said something anyway. "You got a lot of nerve coming in here."

I laughed. "Oh, well, nerve is something I have in abundance…by the way, how's your leg?" I took my knife and stabbed him under the table. He looked down and smiled as the blood trickled down his pant leg. "Can't feel a thing." He shrugged.

"Really, how bout in this one?" I took the knife out and stabbed the other one. He groaned and leaned forward. His head was almost resting on the table. I leaned to his ear. "Stop grumbling. You won't hear what I have to say."

"You're a madman. This is my club. You won't make it out of here alive!"

"Insult, statement, threat- none of which were things I needed to hear from you."

"You're never gonna…"

"Shh! I said listen, I was about to praise you. It's pretty clever- the copycat and all. They say imitation is the sincerest form of flattery…"

He raised his head a bit and faced me now. His eyes were glassy. "I don't know what you're talking about." He voiced facetiously.

"Do you like your fingers? Because you do have ten of them, we could have a good time guessing which ones are your favorites."

"I'm not telling you nothin."

"I'm thinking the index finger. It's everybody's favorite. But it is the pose able thumb that separates us from other primates."

"What do you want?"

"Oh, what happened to I'm not telling you nothing?"

"So I hired the guy, to lure you out. It worked didn't it?"

I shrugged. "Well yes but not in your favor."

"You're here aren't you? Just as I thought… Curiosity killed the cat…" He laughed a bit and looked behind me. I quickly turned.

The bouncer I bribed and another guy were in the process of finishing off three of my men. I had three more around here somewhere…and Blaine. But I couldn't count on him. These were all mobsters not cops…I reached in my lapel and pressed a detonator. Luckily it went off. This bouncer really played both sides of the fence- he set up the detonators but still double crossed me? People screamed and scads of them flew out of the exits trampling over each other on the way out. I took Maroni and pushed him out of the booth. I picked him up and pulled a knife out to his neck. It was surprisingly more difficult to threaten a cripple than someone with all their walking capabilities. He was having trouble standing up at the angle I held him.

"You'll never get away with this."

"That's such a cliché thing to say…hush up! Now Sal, I need you, to tell me who it was that you hired." I kept my request simple.

"I ain't telling you…" I pressed the knife to his throat, enough to draw blood. Now would be a good time to assess my situation. I looked up. The club populace was getting pretty sparse. There were three of his men. There was one of mine coming up from behind. He shot one of them. There were two of his men. But one whipped around and shot mine. Damn.

"Seems like, you're not a very popular guy." Maroni mumbled. These gangsters- so much pride they just won't stop yapping. But he did have a point; my numbers were dwindling if they even still existed. I had been hasty in this. I also heard some guys running up from behind. I reached around and let the second detonator go off. It was close enough that pieces of bodyguard came flying towards us. Maroni lost his footing and fell to the ground. I stumbled a little but caught myself. Because now I'd have to take cover. The bullets started flying. I made my way behind a booth. I was greeted by one of my men cowering next to me.

"Boss we got the explosives but…well I'm the only one. They're all dead. Boss I don't know what to do we're going to have to blow our way out of here I don't mean to be a coward but…" He went on and on. This was Mr. Chatty. He would have been the one to not get shot. I gave him another gun since he was out of bullets and made my way to the bar. There were a lot of structures so I made it around the club quite effortlessly. Though there seemed to be an abundance of bullets from these two guards. Mr. Chatty quickly started firing. It took them by surprise. He hit one of the light fixtures and it fell to the ground.

"Would you stop messing up my club?" Maroni shouted angrily.

Chatty got one of them in the leg I think. Just in time too. I ducked behind the bar and grabbed some alcohol. I started to pour it everywhere. Soon after the bullets resumed. I searched and quickly found a lighter. This was heavily varnished wood. It would burn easily, but the alcohol helped. It quickly set aflame. Giving me just enough cover to get up and get one of his men. Well, my mission was accomplished. All except finding out who it was that was copying me. Any question that it was Maroni after me was squashed after tonight. I could find out my impersonator later. But I had underestimated Maroni's paranoia. I'd have to try to shoot him on my way out or deal with him later as well. Right then, I needed to get out of there.

I had the third explosion go off. This time chunks of the wall flew about. Maroni and his men ducked. The left back exit would be my quickest strategy. I made my way and was almost there when I felt it. I'd gotten one in the arm. I whipped around in the angle I'd been shot at. It was the bouncer.

"Really?" I giggled as I spoke, and then shot him. But this brought me face to face with Maroni and his two men. Well, one of his men. The other I saw was pulling the body of Mr. Chatty out from behind the booth. Well, at least he got shot.

Oh well, it was a good day to die as any. I'm not an idiot. Life is short for guys in my line of work. But I wasn't really going to go out this easy. I was kind of glad Janie hadn't come. Things usually worked out more in my favor. I'd just been lucky though. My plans were always impromptu at best. But it was partially her fault. She'd distracted me…and she was distracting me now. Focus, focus… I was about fifty feet away. I could threaten him with a grenade but I didn't have a clear exit. I'd die with them. I didn't want to die really-not tonight anyway. I held up my gun and shot. Ha, I got bodyguard in the arm. He grabbed it for a second, but it was just a scratch he quickly recovered.

Maroni laughed. "Looks like you're all out of party tricks."

I needed to think of a clever rebuttal before I shot him. I wasn't the best of shots but I didn't have to be with an automatic…there's a guarantee you're going to hit something. I shot him in his arm. What was it with me and the arms tonight? My arm was killing me…I fired again but I was out of ammo…eh, oh well…

Maroni laughed and switched hands for his gun. He and the bodyguard aimed for me. Then, out of nowhere number seven showed up. He was a short little man with a classic clown mask upon his face. About 5'6-5'7 I would say. Good old Blaine. Who knew he had it in him? Blaine had his arm around Maroni's neck and a gun held up to the bottom of his already-bleeding throat. The bodyguard flipped the direction of his gun back and forth. Poor guy didn't know what to do.

Blaine murmured something. I wasn't close enough to hear. But I assume it was the ever popular "drop it," because that's exactly what the bodyguard did. This wasn't really a standoff anymore so I approached them.

Blaine was dragging Maroni to the exit. I picked up a stray gun and pointed it to the bodyguard and followed. The guy was smart enough to stay put. I shot the bodyguard running towards the scene. This time I got the head, not the arm. This one was out of ammo now. I sighed and threw it to the ground.

"Darius said, you only had six men." Maroni murmured as Blaine dragged him.

"Well he said you only had nine." We were at the exit now, Blaine dropped him. I bent my legs and knelt down next to him.

"Well this has been fun. But I must say you're not very kind to your patrons."

"You'll, you'll…"

"Tell your impersonator to find a new occupation."

Maroni was shaking now. From all the shock I'm sure. That and he wasn't a fully well man when this night began. He'd lost a great amount of blood. He slowly nodded. Whether he was telling the truth or not, it was the smart thing to do.

"On second thought, I think I'll just tell him myself." I took my gun and aimed it at his head. Blaine, who was standing by me quickly, swatted it away.

"What, just because he's not a cop I…" I got a closer look at Blaine. Blaine had filled out. His jacket was black and heavy so I couldn't initially see what was underneath it. This might be too much information-but I was aroused. I don't care. I was that ecstatic. My grin stretched all the way across my face. "Well it was awful nice of you to show up."

"Blaine" took my gun from me and walked right out.

"What the fuck?" Maroni voiced. He was probably getting impatient wondering whether or not he was going to die.

"Take it easy Sal I'll see you soon." I gave him a little punch to knock him out. I got up and left the club as well.

I caught up to her, but it wasn't easy. She really was a fast one. I could hear sirens in the distance. I shook my head- Maroni would have someone call the cops. I, we needed to get out of there. She wasn't going to come with me. I played along, acting like I still thought she was the priest.

"Blaine, the cops are coming. We got a car down this way. I also promptly took the gun. It would just be safer for me if I had it…I was an excellent slide-of-hand.

She shook her head and kept walking. Well, that didn't work.

"Janie, come one. I've been in a few of these situations; we really don't need to be walking near the scene of a mass killing- Particularly a mob killing." She'd already known I knew it was her. That's why she'd run out…

The sirens were getting closer and she still was walking. I didn't have time for this. It was only reasonable to give her a fair warning. "Janie, I'm going to pick you up and carry you if I have to. We need a quicker get away than on foot."

"I'm not going with you!"

She speaks. But she probably also speaks the truth. Then again, so do I. I came up behind her and stopped her path. I grabbed her legs and swept her over my shoulders. She responded by taking my arm and twisting it backwards.

"Ouch!" I had to lower her a little. That was my good arm, and now it hurt too! It was enough for me to drop her and for her to get down. She smoothed herself and continued to walk. I laughed as I shook my arm. Luckily, I saw my getaway car. A black Civic was sitting with the passenger door slightly open. I acted fast and grabbed her arm and dragged her to the car. I opened the door and unlocked the rest. I took us around and had her slide in the driver's side to the passenger's. She fought me along the way but I was too fast. I held onto her until I got in and drove off. She was so feisty! It wasn't a few seconds after I pulled off three cop cars whirred past us towards the club.

"See!" I reached over and pulled the mask off from the top of her head. Her hair went everywhere. She smoothed it back out of her face. I smiled again. I was so happy to see her.

"Well, this certainly brings our relationship to a whole new level."

She shook her head. "It doesn't. You had saved my life…" She paused for a moment. "So I saved yours."

"No, this implies you wanted my life to be saved."

"The whole point of me coming was for you to leave me alone."

"No, if that were true…you would have just let me die."

"Instead I end up saving your…I end up having to..." She rested her head in her hands. "Fuck, fuck, fuck…This is all so fucked up."

"It's not. Don't say that. It, that was…" I started laughing. I don't know how to categorize it. I was on edge, but in a good way… "You saved me." I voiced it slowly. "You just, took that gun and held it to Maroni's neck. We, you…we...did you shoot any of his men?"

"No, no!" She was having trouble with this.

"You were fearless, you just had that gun and you took action."

"I was stupid, I'm so stupid. What the hell was I…what am I thinking? I should have just left…I should have just let you…" She turned to me and stared in disbelief.

"There there." I turned over into an alley. I put the car in park. I grabbed the lapels of her coat and kissed her. It was my lucky day. Twice today I'd been able to taste those lips. I wasn't gentle, I wasn't gentle earlier in her apartment but I definitely wasn't now. I was so worked up. I could feel the blood in my veins. Everything was coursing quicker, my heart was beating faster. She responded. I knew she would. Her hand returned to my shoulder. She pulled it closer, clenched it so tight it kind of hurt. That's probably because there was a bullet in it a few inches down… I grabbed her neck and a handful of hair. It was soft, but quickly tangled within my grasp. I was going to have her. I moved back and we looked at each other. I knew if she showed up tonight this was going to happen. I'm good at guessing. It was that connection we shared. That part of me I recognized in her. It was the little spark of predictability. My personality and hers could only be patient for so long. It had been some time since I'd been with someone. But this was different. This was more than I ever could have expected. This was someone...this was Janie. She wasn't going anywhere. I could feel every particle, every little piece of her existence. It was on edge, just as much as I was. She wanted me. This was like a really good trip on some very mind altering drugs. But somehow everything was clear. Everything was as it should have been. I kissed her again, this time her neck. I was ready to explore. She tensed up. Her whole body did. No, no, no… She was trying to fight it off. She leaned back on her side of the car. I followed her, all of me. I couldn't help it. We were like magnets...or more accurately I was the magnet and she the metal. But I'll be damned if she didn't defy nature. She grabbed the door handle and swung herself out. My hands slid off her. My grasp wasn't tight enough to battle her inevitable apprehension. I stared at her. I hated her. I wanted to kill her. I wanted to punish her for being so stubborn, for defying what so desperately needed to take place. On the other hand, I should have known. Her resistant nature made her who she was. I would've respected her less if she wasn't that person. But at that moment I couldn't have cared less about respect. She straightened herself and looked up to me. She knew what she did. She was very astute. She knew that I knew. There wasn't a turning back for us. Our eyes penetrated one another.

"Don't do it, you'll regret it if you do."

She shook her head. "I'll regret it more if I don't." She shrugged and tightened her jacket around herself. She walked off.

She'd left me. The nerve of this one, I tell ya! She'd left me certainly wanting-wanting and furious. I could kill her. It would be fun, I'd be very creative. I was so wound up. It's not healthy to have so much unused energy. She was so obstinate…I could hurt her, I could make her scared. I could make her regret it. But that's just the thing. I could physically hurt her but she had me all twisted. I couldn't really do anything…I flashed back to accidentally cutting her cheek. I didn't want her hurt, I just wanted her. She was good for me. She was too good for anyone else. I moved uncomfortably about in the seat. I flexed my jaw and mouth. It had gotten very passionate there for a second…intensity was through the roof. There was this incredible wave of excitement and pleasure, and then the letdown. It would never be the same. I really didn't want to be in this car anymore. It had started snowing yet again and my line of vision outside was getting fuzzy. I backed the car up to the street and flipped on the lights. Her figure appeared almost a block ahead. It was still walking down the street. I clenched my jaw. She couldn't walk around here. She was tough but this was the narrows…I couldn't see them but I felt them. There were hunters and predators lurking in all the dark corners. They'd already been alerted of her existence. I needed to assert myself. No one was going to bother her tonight- No one except me. I drove a little then got out and followed her. If I let her go, if she even made it home she'd vex over what had happened. But she wouldn't apologize. And I wouldn't see her again until I made it happen. She's too much of a survivalist-helping herself in whatever way she deems best. That's how I would play this. Maybe she'd get back in the car if I could convince her it was in her best interest.

She had heard me, but she didn't stop. "Go away."

"Come on, there are a lot of weirdoes and crazies out and about in these parts."

She laughed and shook her head. I don't know what that was about…

"You're really going to walk all the way across town? You'll freeze before you get there. Well, freeze or end up dead in an alley. You're going to walk all alone on the bridge or tunnel?"

"I'll catch a cab."

"Not in the narrows doll- And not anywhere else since you're covered in blood." I grabbed my arm. I'd just reminded myself.

She stopped and looked down at her clothes. She finally turned to me. "I didn't get shot. Whose blood is this?"

"It's mine. Now will you get in the car?"

She stared at me for a moment. She was mulling this all over. "You got shot?"

"Why would it make a difference? Would you get in the car?"

She shook her head. She was contemplating it. She was still a bit wound up as well, but like I said-survivalist. "I don't particularly feel like freezing. But you can't attack me like some horny teenager. I'm not having sex with you."

"Okay, not tonight." I was beside her now, using my good arm to push her along.

"Joker, not any night, not ever. Try that again and I'll shoot you. And it won't be in the arm."

"You don't have a…" I'd reached in my lapel. She did have the gun. "Whatever you say Janie." Who would have thought it was me being shot that got her attention. She cared about me. I think I saw little cartoon hearts.

It was good to be back in the car. The thermostat read 11. That was cold. And it was only going to get colder. I turned the heater to high as I drove off. My phone illuminated in the cup holder.

"Could you get that for me?"

She gave me a bewildered look.

"It's just a text, just read it to me. It's not safe to text and drive- Especially when I have only one good arm."

She held the phone up and read. "It's from someone called Whip It?"

"Uh-huh."

"It just says Victor Zsasz."

That name sounded familiar.

"Oh wait…it also says tally marks?"

That was it. "Interesting." I voiced. "I didn't really think he had it in him. I knew good old Victor from Arkham. He was in one of the thirty nine rooms at Arkham. The guy likes to kill and cut a tally mark on his body for each of his victims. I guess he got out Fright Night…him and all the other crazies were let loose the night Ra's al Ghul decided to scare the hell out of everyone and almost destroy Gotham. That was a glorious night. Full of pandemonium and pure unadulterated rapture. I myself didn't do that much. I really just enjoyed watching. I'd never felt in such harmony with everyone…but alas."

"Well isn't that special." Janie's remark alerted me that I was thinking aloud.

"Where were you on fright night?"

"I don't remember."

"Sure you do. Don't lie."

"I was," She shook her head. "I was at a party."

"A party? You go to parties?"

"For my job at the school. I had to go. It was a fundraiser."

"Fascinating, and what did you see?"

"What?"

"Don't be coy, I want to know. What was it that you saw? Your fear?" Whatever it was she seemed to be envisioning it right now. "I can't articulate or put in words…" She swallowed. This was odd. I didn't know whether I wanted to ag her on or change the subject. I was conflicted. Luckily she took the lead.

"So, he copied you?"

"I know can you believe it? He starts…killing girls in front of Maroni's club and making it look like I did it."

"Wait…the club is, is that why you were there tonight…to get information?"

"Mmmhmm."

"Well, that makes more sense. But if Maroni was after you why would you go into his club, his fortress and attack him?"

"Now you're making it sound stupid."

"It is stupid."

"It's sweet you're concerned."

"That's not," She sighed. "That's not what I was getting at."

While she was getting angry again, I was getting a little woozy. Thank goodness we we're close to my place.

…

I'd made it. I didn't think I would but I made it. I put the car in park in the alley. Someone would come pick it up in a few hours. Now we only had a half-a block's walk.

"Where are we?"

"My place. You were just here…" I got out of the car. She followed suit.

"Okay well, thanks for the ride I guess. Stay out of my life now."

"Janie, that wasn't part of the deal…"

"Yes it was. If I didn't respond or change my mind by tonight…"

"You call what we started in the car earlier not responding?"

She was about to argue but she stopped herself. She knew her excuses had no validity. "I'm done." She shook her head. There she went walking again…I caught up with her.

"So what are you going to tell the police?"

"They don't know where I am."

"Yeah, but what about when you return with blood all over you? How are you going to explain that?"

"I left a note on kitchen bar in case they came in. I'll just spend the night in a hotel or something."

"No, you'll spend the night with me."

"That is not going to happen."

I put my arm around her. It was cold…but mostly I needed the support. Janie made my head spin but blood loss and an open wound made it spin even more. I fell on her a bit.

"Jesus." She murmured and braced me with her hand on my chest. "Where did you get shot?"

"My arm." I nestled my head to hers. I don't have a lot of inhibitions ordinarily. But at this point they were completely gone. "You're so stunning. Too bad you don't feel like having sex tonight." I kissed her neck. She tried to push me off but it was a bad angle.

"So you save me at the club but you're going to just let me kill over now?"

"Don't do this…don't make me responsible for you."

"All I'm doing is keeping us warm." My arm clenched to her tightly. She fit well in my clutch. I don't mind girls the same height as me, or even taller. But it was nice she was shorter. Janie, my little pillar of strength. I was getting dizzier. I'd felt like this before when I was shot in the leg. Though that had hindered my mobility even more than this was.

"Do you have some, underworld type doctor that you could go to?"

I laughed. "I'm not a mobster Janie. Besides, who needs doctors when we have the internet? Healthcare is just a farce to…"

"Save me the entropic philosophical theories please…" I couldn't see her face, but I hinted some despondency in her voice. She was either really worried about me or she felt obligated to help me when she reaaaaaallllly didn't want to. Probably a mixture of both…

My senses were getting a little hazy. Some of them were becoming stronger than others. Like, my vision was slowly deteriorating. But my sense of small was sharp. I could smell the cold, the wet air. But mostly I could smell her. She was my favorite smell.

I never thought we'd get here, but Janie was in my apartment. Well, the one I was using at the moment. It was a loft style, just on the edge of the island in the middle of Chinatown. I kept odd hours so I hardly ever ran into anyone. Chinatown also has its fair share of crime. Most of the citizens stay put in the wee hours.

My door opens like a garage door. It's nice because it just looks like part of the wall. I was telling Janie all about it in attempts to impress her…I think. My memory is a little bit fuzzy. It fades in and out. I have this mental picture of her opening the door and helping me in. I don't think anything happened next except she kind of dropped me on the couch.

"Thanks for the help Janie. I knew you wouldn't leave me."

She took a second and sat down beside me. My hands were busy trying to grab her. She was busy swatting them away. "Mark my words Joker. Tomorrow, I'm not going to be so nice. I want you out of my life. I want you gone. I will take measures to assure that."

I heard her but I didn't respond. There was no use. I was thinking about hot air balloons. I've never seen one in real life but I've always liked them. Maybe I had a model of one in my room as a kid? I don't know- I might be making that up. Janie left then came back with some towels. She told me to take my jacket off…then my shirt. I made a crack about that but she ignored it as she usually does.

"I can see the bullet."

"Wonderful, take it out."

"What?"

"Take it out for me doll."

She was nervous; she didn't want to do that. I moved my hand upon her cheek. My gloves were off. I could feel her skin. "It's just like cutting tenderloin."

"I should just let it get infected. Let you die here."

"But you won't." I pulled out a knife and handed it to her. She held it in her hands and stared.

"Now don't you steal it, it's to help get the bullet out."

She got up and left for a minute. I got angry. I didn't know where she went. She always leaves. But this time she came back. She had washed the knife and was burning it with a lighter. Something about the flame- I was a little more alert now.

"This won't sterilize it completely I don't think."

"I'm not really worried at this point Janie."

She sat on the couch next to me. She gripped my shoulder and looked up at me. "You ready…because I have to tell you I don't know if it's going to work."

"Then I'll die in your arms. It will be very poetic."

She pursed her lips as she gripped my shoulder and stuck the knife in a bit. It stung but not that bad initially. That was because she wasn't getting anything accomplished.

"You're going to have to…" There it went. I grabbed her thigh right above her knee. That knife hurt and I really needed to relieve the pressure. She didn't say anything, even when I squeezed harder and felt around a bit. "It's not in deep but it's like, lodged…" She put down the knife and brought her fingers up to it.

"What are you doing?"

"Just a second." She stuck her index finger and thumb into the wound. Somehow, I don't know how, but it hurt more than the knife. But wouldn't you know it- her barbaric method worked. Out came her fingers and out came the bullet.

"Where did you learn to do that?"

"I saw it on Swamp People."

"And here comes the blood…" I murmured.

"What?" She looked at the wound. I've seen it many a times before. Blood oozed from it like a mini-waterfall. She took a towel on her lap and poured peroxide on it.

"Way to warn a guy…" She took several paper towels and placed them on the wound. She looked around the place then got up again. I hate it when she leaves.

She came back with duct tape. She took it and wrapped it around my arm to secure it. I chuckled.

She relaxed back onto the couch in sheer exhaustion. I sat back next to her.

"You've really saved me tonight."

"I'm still mulling that over. Don't talk about it right now."

"The generator powers everything. I get water if you want to clean yourself off." Whoever said I wasn't hospitable…

"No," Her voice sounded somewhere far off. "I think I'm just going to sit her."

I nodded. "Alright Janie." I relaxed my head in her lap. She pushed me off…I laughed.

The hours passed like that. It was still dark but barely. She had fallen asleep and her body naturally leaned to the other end of the couch. I just watched her. It was calming. When she's not yelling at me or taking a bullet out of my arm she generally has that effect. I wanted to touch her. Touch is important in a relationship. Though right now I suspect I wanted it more than her. All she wanted to do was sleep. She'd told me so this morning. I wasn't much of a sleeper. I didn't understand the practice fully. But I found myself wanting to right now. I wanted to be comfortable and complacent. I thought about moving us to the bed but she might get the wrong idea about that and shoot me with the gun she had. Where was she hiding it? No I just continued to let her lie there, while I sat there, just staring. I really liked her. It was then I realized that whatever happened, I now had vulnerability. I never had regard for life before, but I did hers. She mattered. She was different and special. She was the one that I wanted. She could be mine. She understood me. As I've said all along, she'll raise above all the propriety.

Bats and Gordon thought they would use her to get to me. But that wasn't a problem. They were predictable. And they were the "good guys." They wouldn't put her in harm's way. It wasn't them I needed to worry about. Well, they wouldn't physically harm her. Maybe I needed to worry about them a little. They'd do their best to sway or convince her to not be with me. Though she'd never tell them…I didn't like them trying to manipulate her- in a small way they'd already done it but I could see where this was going. They were going to try and take her. I couldn't have that. I had to protect her from all those poison devils.

…

I don't know what surprised me more- The fact that I actually woke up in the morning or the fact that I fell asleep. Janie was gone, that was no surprise. She was a mover…always bouncing about- the girl had trouble staying still. I wasn't going to wake with her next to me. Up I rose. My head hurt. Why did the sirens have to be so loud? My arm was throbbing. I made my way to the kitchen to get some water. I needed to hydrate. My mouth was completely dry. I wasn't being paranoid, but the sirens were getting closer. I looked out the window. Well, it was a party outside. Police were scouting the neighborhood. They were searching for someone-they were searching for me. I was feeling pretty ambivalent about this. No one knew where I lived. No one, that is, except her. I pursed my lips. She wouldn't call the cops on me. There was no way-not after what we went through...

They were in my building now. I had a way out. I always had a way out. But that wasn't the issue. I took a quick scan around the apartment. This was my favorite one. It was a loft; it was bigger than all the rest. I looked around with no avail. She wasn't there. Of course she wasn't. This wasn't good, to wake up and almost immediately become so angry. I gathered up my coat and picked up my laptop. I threw it across the room until it broke. I had to do something. I'm not the type of person that let's anger fester. I let it out. But I opened the window anyway and threw it out towards my greeting party. They hadn't made it to my floor yet. I can't believe she called the police. I must say; my suspension of disbelief was in question now. We'd been through stuff. She'd saved my life. I'd saved hers. We had a moment of clarity, a breakthrough in her conduct. Oy Vey! She did say today would be different. But I'd be lying if I said I wasn't surprised.

I pick these places for a reason. They're connected to the city water lines. There's an underground system that connects everyone to running water. It's actually quite peaceful. There's a walkway for the maintenance men and everything. Honestly though, it's a bit disturbing. It's quite scary to think we actually drink this stuff. There are all sorts of critters running down here and several cracks in the pipes. But I suppose that's about par. Everyone has their own pipes it runs through first so I guess it doesn't matter.

I emerged an hour later. My other place wasn't that far. All I had to do was go down an alley. It was risky but I had to go up and get some fresh air. It was a bit warmer today. Just enough to make you think you can walk in it. But not really- when the wind bounced off the buildings it bit you. In my case, it bit all my sore spots. It was particularly cruel toward my arm. Janie had fixed up my arm. She fixed it up just so she could sick the dogs on me. What a naughty girl. I didn't like this. I was mad at her again, like I was last night when she jumped out of the car. She had a lot of guts, I'll give her that. If I didn't know better, I'd say balls. She has a lot of balls. She certainly wasn't cowardly in her approach. There was no mystery that it was her. And we were doing so well…

I got into my other apartment and flipped the generator on, then the heater. It was even colder than outside if that was even possible. I wish I had some firewood. I'd start a fire in the middle of living room if I had some. But alas…I didn't have any firewood because I wasn't prepared. I didn't have my laptop because I'd gotten angry. In fact, I still was. I was very, very irritated with her. I was all about teaching lessons…I'd have to perform my magnum-opus for Janie. She'd gotten close to me, and then she betrayed that confidence. She deserved nothing less than my best effort. Because of her I didn't have my girl. Well, I didn't have her like I thought I did. I'd have to up my game. But this wasn't my fault. It wasn't my fault she was so stubborn. I'd never asked or wanted her to insert herself into my life. She'd done that all on her own. My girl was not ignorant. She was entirely cognizant of her actions. It was her fault, but not all hers. We'd have to have a little heart-to-heart about this. No, no- she'll come around. I'd already guessed this would happen. On the other hand, it was my job to step up and shield her, I'd been too indulgent. I needed to man-up. I needed to protect her from them. I couldn't say exactly who it was that helped her come to the decision to double cross me. But I'm really good at guessing.