Chapter 4

Ciel found himself lying on a carpeted floor. He raised his head to scan his surroundings and he realized that he was in a church. Sitting in the pews around him were familiar faces as well as strange ones. Why did he feel as if he had been here before? After he raised himself onto his hands and knees to stand, he screamed and stumbled while clutching his chest. The boy looked down at his chest and saw that there was a hole straight through it. Dark shadowy viscera dripped from the wound. No blood or muscle could be seen. Ciel stared at his wound in confusion as the area around the opening throbbed in intense pain. Before the youth could study the opening any further, the church doors slammed open, causing him to snap his head towards the entrance. What Ciel witnessed caused him to scream in abject horror. He wanted to crawl away on his hands and knees and bear the pain, but his body was frozen as if under a strange spell. At first his heart jumped as he saw the strange shadowy figures walk towards him. Once the figures were close enough to be seen, tears streamed down his cheeks as he finally realized what stood before him.

The two dark figures staggered and limped their way down the aisle. They moved slowly and stiffly—as if they were severely injured. Aside from their feet shuffling against the crimson carpet, they were silent. As they moved closer to him, the sobbing boy felt his throat clamp up tight in panic. All of his air left his lungs. The figures were covered head to toe in black ash. Their faces were not easily discernable but the dress and heels of one figure revealed it to be a woman and the suit and ascot tie of the other figure revealed it to be male. Ciel choked and gasped for air as the specters advanced. They were now only a few feet away. The male wraith reached out towards the boy, but its arm crumbled to ash. Soon enough both figures were dissipating into piles of the wretched dust.

Ciel sat up in his bed screaming and sobbing. Sweat beaded his face and back. His throat was hoarse from the endless shrieking. Out of all of his most treacherous nightmares, he was never affected by them quite like this one affected him. Before the youth knew what happened, Sebastian was walking towards his bedside. He did not even realize that he was in the room until that moment.

"Young Master, are you alright? You had a bad dream."

The butler sat at his bedside and wiped away the sweat that drenched his bangs.

"Sebastian... " the boy huffed in between sobs, "It was...it was my parents. It felt so real. So real I could just...aah!"

Ciel was interrupted by his own cries. His face burned with fear and embarrassment.

"I'm just...so scared. I'm so scared!" he trembled. The youth grabbed at Sebastian's arms in desperation. Ciel had never felt this hopeless in his life. It seemed as if every one of his anxieties was suffocating him all at once.

The man frowned at the pitiful sight before him. His face portrayed an empathetic show of pain, but his cruel scarlet eyes briefly flickered in the darkness. He wrapped his arms around the boy in a close embrace.

"Don't be afraid, Bocchan. It's over now."

Ciel never thought that he would ever welcome a hug from Sebastian, but at that moment it was exactly what he needed. The boy returned it and savored the man's warmth. It seemed to be the only thing that could comfort him.

What is wrong with me? I'm never this afraid.

The boy felt weak and languid. Was it the crying that exhausted him? He was not sure. All that he knew was that he needed Sebastian to be at his side. He needed to feel secure. After a few moments, he could almost fall asleep against his butler's firm body. Sebastian seemed to sense this and whispered into his ear.

"Bocchan, do you wish to go back to sleep?"

There it was again. That familiar hot breath.

"Um. I don't know…I just. I feel comfortable."

Sebastian nodded and resumed holding his charge. A few moments later he lightly kissed the top of the teen's head. He then placed several more kisses in his hair. Ciel lifted his head until he was facing Sebastian. He wanted to tell him that he was being annoying but his mind felt fuzzy for some reason. Truth be told, he was enjoying all contact with his butler at the moment, but he knew that a line was being crossed. Sebastian placed more light kisses on Ciel's forehead—gradually moving down to his cheeks. Ciel felt strange. Was this really happening? Sebastian's kisses slowly traveled to the boy's lips. Once the man's lips brushed against them, Ciel felt an almost electric sensation. Before the teen could process what just happened, Sebastian's hand was entangled in his hair and his lips were capturing his mouth. As Sebastian deepened the kiss, Ciel's confused mind slipped away. The demon eventually broke the kiss and briefly tucked Ciel back under the sheets—almost as if he just realized his transgression.

"Back into bed, Young Master. Sleep well."

Before the butler could walk away from the bed, the boy grabbed him by his arm.

"Wait. Sebastian?"

A sinister grin crept across the man's face. His serpentine eyes flickered like embers. He remembered to instantly switch his grin to a look of concern as soon as he turned to face the young Phantomhive boy.

"Bocchan… I deeply apologize for my inappropriate behavior. I simply couldn't help myself."

Ciel paused as he realized what his butler just told him. He had been blushing this entire time but he felt himself grow even more flustered.

" 'Couldn't help yourself'? Are you...are you fond of me Sebastian? In an intimate way?"

The demon took a half step back in shock. Ciel was normally very guarded about emotional talk. He did not expect him to be so direct.

"Well of course. I have always been quite fond of you. And my fondness for you has only grown in these last few years. Just as you yourself have grown."

Ciel then turned away from the man's gaze to stare at his fidgeting hands. He had much to ponder over. The truth was that he always felt a strong bond with Sebastian. His companionship was the most intimate relationship he ever felt with another being aside from his late parents, and to a lesser extent, Tanaka. Was this the natural progression for their relationship? From reading countless novels, Ciel always wondered what his first truly romantic experience would be like. Even his arranged engagement to Elizabeth did not quite elicit the feelings of love that he expected he would have. Romance was not something that preoccupied him too much, so it always seemed like a nebulous concept. Due to his almost theoretical concept of love, it did not bother him that his relationship with Elizabeth was mostly devoid of it. He had deep affections for the girl and they occasionally crossed over into mild infatuation. But not enough for him to feel exceptional passion or lust. Could a male be his compatible lover? A demon male at that?

"Do not worry yourself over it," Sebastian quickly retorted, "Regardless of how I feel, I am certain that you are much too young for such affections."

The youth then glared at the butler. He clearly took umbrage at the remark.

"I am not. I am more than capable of reciprocating these affections. And in case you were also wondering, I have desires as well."

Ciel left the bed and walked towards Sebastian. He embraced the man and grabbed his chin to drag him into a forceful kiss. The demon was surprised by his Young Master's forwardness. He softly chuckled at Ciel's attempts to deepen it just as he had done for him.

-:-:-:-:-

It was the grey hours of early morning when Sebastian left Ciel's room. He could hear the boy snoring softly as he quietly closed the door. He silently walked down the stairs of the Phantomhive manor and traversed the cavernous hallways into the kitchen. The butler fastened an apron around his waist and began creating pastry dough. He could not help but smile wickedly as he replayed the events leading up to that early morning. The poor youth could have never known that his butler had been manipulating his dreams this whole time. Nor could he have known that Sebastian could use his scent to charm humans into letting their guard down. The boy fell into every trap he set for him. Like a desperate rodent that got its limbs caught in one mousetrap after the other. Like a moth to a flame.

The man then stored the pastry sheets in the icebox. He needed it to stiffen while he worked on the filling. He pulled several apples from a fruit basket and began slicing them in quick succession. As he sliced, he replayed the more intimate events from that morning and chuckled in delight. They did not go too far, thankfully. There would be plenty of time for more activities. He did not want to traumatize him just yet. Nor did he want the boy to feel used. Instead he let Ciel lead most of their actions. Well, as much as an inexperienced lad could.

He truly is a quick study. How cute!

Despite the sexual nature of this exploitation, Sebastian derived far more pleasure from corrupting the teen—as was expected for a demon of his nature. Except for his occasional nocturnal outings, it was rare that he was lascivious for his own sake. Usually sexual gratification was just a mere perk of a greater plan of his: extracting information, soul grooming, etc. Sebastian finished wrapping the turnovers and he placed them in the oven. He then retreated into the pantry to select a tea. While inside the pantry he could hear the other Phantomhive servants exit their dormitory and head to the kitchen to eat their breakfast. Sebastian sighed. He would have to make sure that all activities with the young Earl were conducted as discreetly as possible. The last thing he needed on his plate was for the servants to suspect impropriety.

Just as he did every morning, Sebastian rolled the breakfast trolley into the young Earl's room. Ciel was still in deep sleep, unaware of the presence in his chambers. Sebastian walked over to the windows and hesitated before pulling on the curtain strings. Instead of drawing them as he normally did at this time, he approached the boy's bedside and ran his fingers through his dark locks. Ciel slowly stirred.

"Five more minutes…"

The demon chuckled and leaned in towards the teen's face. He planted a soft kiss on his lips. Ciel's eyes instantly fluttered awake. A deep blush appeared on his cheeks when he felt his butler's hot breath so close to his face.

"Oh. Good morning."

"And a good morning to you, Young Master." His lips curled into the sweetest smile he could muster, "I see that I may have tired you out this morning?"

"Um...no. I'm fine." the blushing boy tried to regain his composure.

"Good to hear that, Bocchan. And now that you are fully awake, I believe that we should talk about some rather serious matters."

"Oh?"

"Yes. You see Bocchan, I adore you and care about you dearly. Would you say the same of me?"

"...Yes." Ciel mumbled softly.

"Right. Well as I'm sure that you are aware of, our arrangement would draw a great deal of judgment if others suspected that we had a relationship more intimate than master and servant."

"Of course!" replied Ciel sharply. He felt sick as he imagined anyone else finding out. Even minor rumors of such a thing could cause problems for his noble reputation. It would disgrace the Phantomhive name and possibly result in judicial action against both of them. Regardless of who initiated.

"For that reason it is very important that we keep our true relationship a secret and our activities discreet. Understood?"

Ciel nodded somberly. He shuddered as he began to think about what he had gotten himself into.

Sebastian then smiled and resumed drawing the curtains. He then rolled the trolley towards the Earl's bedside. It was as if the conversation never happened. Regardless of their new status as more than master and servant, the butler was still as professional as always. For some strange reason, the boy felt his chest lurch when he realized that Sebastian was about to leave him. Ciel waited patiently for Sebastian to touch him once more before leaving his room. Instead, the dutiful butler exited the chamber doors with the trolley. The boy sighed and bit into a warm turnover. The breakfast pastry was baked to perfection, but his mind was so preoccupied that it may as well had been plaster.

After the boy finished eating breakfast, Sebastian returned to dress him for the day. Although he did not receive a kiss this time, he could have sworn there were times when the man's fingers lingered on his bare skin a second too long. The possibility drove Ciel mad. For the rest of the morning Ciel felt as if he were in a daze. Soon it was late morning and he found himself slouching at his bureau and rereading the same paragraphs of a Funtom document over and over again. The young scion pinched his brow in frustration and threw the pen across his desk. For the first time in his life his brilliant mind felt like mush. Every thought about the Funtom contract before him morphed into thoughts about his contract with Sebastian. Every thought about his contract with Sebastian led to thoughts about his bond with the demon. And those very thoughts about that bond always led to him replaying events from early that morning. Is he doomed to obsess over his butler forever?

The truth was that he has always been fascinated with Sebastian. His preternatural instincts and wealth of experience was a true match for a precocious mind such as Ciel's. His stories of past lives and contracts often triggered the boy's innate curiosity even though he tried not to seem impressed. And then of course there was always that other part of him. That new Ciel that often envied the man for his sexual conquests. That new part of him felt intimidated by the man's prowess. Intimidated by his physicality. For months he suspected that Sebastian's skills were not limited to women alone, and now he knew from first hand experience that he is a far gifted lover than Ciel could have ever imagined at such a tender age. The question remained: did he want to be him or did he carnally want him? The Earl sighed and rested his head on the desk. He closed his eyes and tried not to think about the new anxiety that flooded his mind. What had he gotten himself into?

It was a little while after noon when Sebastian entered the Earl's study.

"Young Master, for lunch I—"

Sebastian paused when he turned and noticed that the boy was fast asleep and sprawled over his desk. The demon chuckled and walked over to his charge. He leaned over and whispered into the boy's ear.

"Wake up, Young Master. Don't sleep the day away."

The boy stirred and rubbed his eyes before lowering his head again. He mumbled something incoherent. Sebastian smirked. He whispered once more.

"Perhaps for the future, I shouldn't engage in nighttime activities with you. Lest you be too tired for the rest of the day."

Ciel's eyes opened and his cheeks burned crimson. He glared at the butler in annoyance.

"I was only joking. Must you be so cross with me?" asked the butler with slight concern.

The young Earl sighed and straightened out the wrinkles in his cobalt-colored frock.

"Is there any reason I shouldn't be cross, Sebastian? I don't know how to read you sometimes. You...do those things with me. And then you act as if nothing happened. Or worse; you treat me as a child. I'm frustrated. Do you even desire me?"

Sebastian sighed and cupped the youth's cheek. Ciel pushed his arm away.

"Bocchan. I understand this must be confusing for you. But I have to be discreet with these matters. It would not be fitting with my Butler Aesthetics if I mixed such actions in with my daily work. There will be times in which I need to act as your butler, but there will also be times in which we can put that aside. I know that you aren't used to this kind of arrangement. Believe me,

I am more than aware of that."

Ciel kept his eyes averted and stared at the documents on his bureau. The man's gloved fingers reached for Ciel's chin once more and turned it to face him.

"I care for you. Never doubt that."

Sebastian delivered a chaste kiss on Ciel's cheek. Ciel gingerly touched the spot on his face and marveled at the sensation the kiss left behind. Sebastian chuckled to himself darkly as he retrieved the lunch.

Always keep them wanting more.