Okay, I lied. This has taken me a lot more time than I expected to post. Also, I haven't been putting it in, but I think it's obvious that this is all in Bella's POV. If I do a chapter in another POV, I'll let you know. :D -Aurora
Disclaimer: Yadda, yadda, yadda, not mine.
"Let's see..." Edward began, holding up a pen. "We should identify which rules we would actually want to break."
"Let's get started, then."
Before long, we had our list. Rules two, three, four, five, six, twelve, sixteen, nineteen, and especially twenty-five were the rules that we might want to break.
"Rule Two is easily dealt with. The term 'inside voices' is undefined," Edward said, making note of that fact on the rule sheet.
"Rule Three is my favorite to get around," I said teasingly. "The rule says 'limited', not 'forbidden'." I marked it down, and Edward grinned at me.
"You're becoming one of us," He pointed out. "That was a loophole worthy of Alice." I smiled. "Rule Four isn't one that we should be too worried about, but you never know. Emmett will definitely want to exploit this one, and he probably won't have a loophole. We will have one for him." I nodded. Emmett would certainly want to embarrass us with a swinging rendition of Barbie Girl or something like it.
"Do we really want him to be able to sing freely, though?" I asked. Edward chuckled.
"Not really, love, but he might have a loophole that we don't have. We would trade. As for the loophole, any attempt at singing made by Emmett isn't singing, it's screeching. Screeching isn't forbidden." I laughed, and while Edward wrote the loophole down, I pondered Rule Five.
"Technically, none of you ever use your real names," I pointed out. Edward looked at me, confused. "Well, Alice's real name is Mary Alice Whitlock. The rule says to use real names, it didn't specify that we had to use our real names. I could tell every person there that my name is Mary, and not specify which one. I would have the whole place thinking I'm the blessed virgin, though that might violate rules Eleven and Twelve." At this Edward laughed and gave me a kiss.
"You are diabolical." I beamed. "Rule Six shouldn't be too hard to get around. If we never let Helen get a word in, as in, talk over her all the time, she can't tell us to do, or not to do, anything."
"Good thinking." He wrote the loophole on the sheet. "Rule Twelve is easy. No one can say they're God, but the rule says nothing about saying you are a god. Also, there's nothing about saying someone else is God. Another one," I went on as Edward jotted my loopholes down, "is that it's limited to God. What about saying you're Allah, or something? Finally, It says that 'you' aren't God. Everyone knows how to lie." When I finished my loophole tirade, Edward looked at me and grinned, surprising me when he gave me a kiss that made my knees weak, making some corner of my mind glad that I was sitting down.
"This experience makes you more of a Cullen than any marriage ceremony ever could," He said, seeming breathless. I smiled.
"We still have some rules to break. Let's get cracking." He laughed.
"Alright. Rule Sixteen is easy. The term 'the family' is undefined. Which family?" I giggled as he wrote the loophole on the now heavily marked page.
"Rule Nineteen says that yelling Panic! At The Disco won't be tolerated. Screaming, stage-whispering, saying, and writing aren't mentioned." I wrote the loophole as I spoke.
"Very nice," Edward complimented. "I'm not sure how to get around Rule Twenty-Five. Maybe one of the other couples will have something." As if right on cue, Emmett burst into the room.
"How the hell do I get past Rule Twelve?" He asked, A manic look in his eye. Rosalie walked into the room then, holding up a piece of paper that was heavily marked with purple pen.
"We'll give you a way past Rule Seventeen," She said with a small smile. I smiled back at her.
"Sure thing, Rose. Emmett, we have four loopholes for Rule Twelve," Edward said. "All Bella's ideas." He showed Emmett our paper. After reading our loopholes for Rule Twelve, He ran over and hugged me.
"You rock, Bella! Who knew a human could come up with kickass loopholes?"
"Emmett--can't---breathe!" I gasped. Edward pulled Emmett off me. "Thanks," I said, beaming at him. He wrapped his arms around my waist.
"Any time," he murmured, putting his lips gently to mine.
"Hey you two! You want a way past Seventeen or not?" Emmett yelled. Edward frowned and we broke apart.
"What did you find?" I asked, swaying slightly. Edward put one arm around my waist to hold me up.
"Well, it bans 'pwn', but it says nothing about the normal spelling for 'own'. Also, it doesn't ban any other web speak. Words such as 'n00b' and 'w00t' are still permitted," Rosalie stated, reading off her paper. Alice and Jasper joined us then.
"We have a way past Rule Twenty-Five," Alice announced, looking around the room. All of us turned to look at her. "It's not really a loophole, because is doesn't get around the rule, so we'll give it to you for free. Rule Twenty-Five is pretty much obsolete, because all it does is clarify the other rules, which we'll already be able to get around." She smiled.
"Thanks, Alice," The four of us said in unison. Alice grinned.
"It was Jasper's idea," she said, looking at Jasper with love in her eyes. After a while, Emmett cleared his throat. "Okay everyone," Alice said, snapping back to reality, "it's time to leave."
A/N: There, my longest chapter ever. Sorry about the wait, the...two of you that read this. I told myself when I started posting fanfic that I wouldn't get sucked into the review-whore thing. I was wrong. Review, please. ^^ The next chapter might be in the near future if I get a review or two...
THE ACCOUNT NAME WILL BE CHANGED. GO TO MY PROFILE FOR MORE DETAILS. -Aurora