Synopsis: After Ali's entombment Aria, can't get Jason off her mind, something she has been having trouble with for months since that day in front of his house when she left with Ezra feeling like she made a mistake.

Characters: Aria Montgomery, Jason DiLaurentis

This is part of the Welcome Back to Rosewood series of one shots. It is inspired by the song if You Only Knew by Shine Down

Pairing: Jason/Aria (friendship, but deeper feelings are alluded to) Ezra/Aria (discontent with relationship and things she has done to be with him)

~~~~~If You Only Knew~~~~~

Aria hadn't been able to sleep all night since seeing Jason at Alison's re-entombment. She looked at her bedside clock, it was 4:03 am fifteen minutes since the last time she had looked. She thinks a walk will help only to find herself standing in front of Jason's house. Much to her amazement there he is, as if he somehow knew that she needed to see him, to be with him. But, from the look of astonishment on his face when she called his name and turned, she knew that wasn't the case.

He looked so alone as he stood there a garbage bag clutched in his hands, he had been picking up what appeared to be bottles and throwing them away when she had walked up behind him she looked at the last remaining bottles and seen they were unopen fifths of whisky.

"Jason?" Aria hadn't been to his house since that day Ezra had showed up, had barely spoken to him because of Ezra's insecurity where Jason was concerned so his surprise at seeing her was understandable. If he only knew how she had longed to seek him out since that day. That day when she had ignored his hurt and the twisting in her own heart as if something inside her was breaking.

He shrugged and for some reason as if he needed to explain himself, "Someone left me a gift." His voice is bitter and then with an exasperated sigh he asks, "Aria? What are you doing here?"

He looked at her the question still in his eyes and she really didn't know the answer. She just knows that she wants to be here with him. She needs to be with him. She feels like she was losing a part of herself and that Jason is the only one who can help her find it. She feels like she left a part of herself that day, the part of herself that she liked most. She couldn't find it or get it back. This missing part isn't with Ezra, she has done things to be with Ezra that she hates? The part of her that is missing would never have allowed her to go so far.

"I... I couldn't sleep. I close my eyes and I see you, I've tried not to think about you for months, I feel like a part of me is missing now and it has been since that day." She rambles on in confusion trying to make him understand that he is the only one who can help. Jason just stands there looking at her, confusion and disbelief are swirling in his green eyes. She tells him about her doubts and fears and the awful things she had done to be with Ezra, and how she can barely stand to look at herself in the mirror, but still he stands there looking at her, eyes wide with astonishment and disbelief.

Aria thinks she needs to leave before he thinks she has completely lost her mind, she means to turn around and walk away from him, but instead she takes a step toward him, as though her feet believe he is the only one who can help her now. Jason just stands there clutching the garbage bag tighter, Aria mind screams at her feet, what are they doing, he obviously doesn't want her here. Her mind tells her feet to turn around, but it is like they have disconnected from the rest of her and she take another step in his direction, she hears the clank, of the bag as it falls to the ground just seconds before Jason sweeps her into his arms.

"I've needed you so much." He tells her in a harsh voice. "If you only knew how much I needed you next to me, by my side. But, you chose someone else. You've ignored me since, not even acting like you want my friendship." he told her pulling away from her searching her eyes with his own. Aria wished she could deny it, her treatment of Jason was just something to add to the growing list of the things Aria had done that she hated to be with Ezra. "Why are you here now?"

"Because I can't stand not being a part of your life or not having you in mine anymore. God, if you only knew how bad I've needed you too. Let me stay with you?" She is now the one searching his eyes and as soon as she sees the softening in his green eyes she hugs him to her tightly.

She lets him go and takes Jason by the hand and leads him inside. He turns and locks the door and then she leads him upstairs and into his bedroom. Jason knows she is not looking for sex, they are too exhausted mentally, emotionally and physically for that. She looks as weary as he has felt for so long.

They both lay down on his bed fully dressed and with a contented sigh they move into each other's arms and for the first time in weeks both begin to fall into a peaceful slumber almost immediately, wrapped in the security and comfort of each other's arms. Neither one knows where this will lead, but for now it is enough.

Before Aria completely gives over to sleep she wonders if Ezra only knew how she had longed for Jason these past months would he trust her, should he trust her? She wasn't sure if she knew.

~Fin~

Notes: I'm not sure what I think about this, I was listening to this song and it is just a flow of consciousness exercise. The only thing fixed in these are spelling and punctuation. Anyway, I hope you like it.

XoXo,

GrimLi