T&E chapter 4
A/N We do not own Twilight or it's characters. Stephenie Meyer does. Iluvthecu11ens and emsmom01 own Trial and Error. Please comment, we love to hear from everyone.
I heard the guard approach my cell. He had and annoying habit of jingling his keys whenever he walked by. At least I can hear him coming though. I had been crying again and shot up quickly when I heard him say, "Check." I was just put into this cell so I had nothing to get in trouble with. I had nothing at all. My cell was empty, except for me and the cot they call a bed.
This was the first time I actually took a look at the guard that was there. The phrase 'Greek God' does not even begin to do him justice. He had to be at least 6'3" tall. He had a head full of this messy bronze hair. He was completely gorgeous and could easily be on the cover of GQ instead of being a prison guard. He had these brilliant green eyes… "Stop it, Bella." I said quietly to myself. Even when I had my freedom, I would have never been in the same league as a guy like this. I would have never had a chance. I am not free and never will be again, so what was the point in even appreciating his beauty.
Since it was my first day here, it was explained to me that I would not have any privileges. That meant that I even had meals in my cell. It was almost time for dinner. Five O'clock was early for me to eat, and the schedule of this prison would take some getting used to. The only reason I look forward to meals here is because they break up the monotony a bit. The only other activities I have at the moment are staring out of my cell at the brick wall, laying or sitting on my bunk, and crying about my mother and this extremely horrible situation. I am sure a time will come when things get easier or at least tolerable. When I get used to the new routines, and accept that this is how I will spend the rest of my life, this will be a cakewalk.
Dinner was a disgusting, unidentifiable mess. I think it was a beef-o-roni type thing, but I can't be sure. I ate just enough so I wouldn't be starving. Prison food is a lot like school cafeteria food, with much less flavor. Before I went to prison, I loved to cook for me and Renee. She was always eager to try what I made. Cooking was one of the few passions I had. Renee and I even took a cooking class together once… It was a fad she was into briefly. I just wish that Phil was a briefer fad for her and that she was still here. Her favorite was Chicken Fettuccini Alfredo; I wish I was having that tonight instead of this slop.
I am determined to be on my absolute best behavior. Maybe then I can get my books back. Passing the time will be so much easier for me then. God, I even miss the way books smell. I am so pathetic. I have never had many friends, so the characters in books became my friends and family. Getting lost in a good book is when I truly lived.
At around 7:30PM a female guard came to take me for my shower. This is what I hate most about being imprisoned; that someone watches me shower. The guard not only watched me, I could feel her staring at me. It was almost like she was leering at me. I really hope she is not a lesbian. I showered quickly and was escorted back to my cell. I fell asleep quickly. I was happy that one more day in prison was over.
The next morning my breakfast tray arrived at about 5:30AM. I guess I am still getting meals in my cell. I know I won't get to have meals with the general population, but I was looking forward to getting out of my cell for a little while. Breakfast was the prison version of an Egg McMuffin and there was some sort of orange drink with it. I didn't drink coffee every day, but I am even missing that. No caffeine is killing me. This stupid breakfast had to go and remind me of my mom. We would go and get Egg McMuffins and hash browns with juice every Sunday morning and then we would drive around and look for yard sales. Renee loved to look for something she could turn into something else. She was always so creative. Great, now I am crying again. Why does everything remind me of her? I miss her so much.
Here comes Mr. Jingles again, I thought to myself. I heard the guard jingling his keys again as he approached my cell. I tried to pull myself together as he said, "Check." My eyes were red and puffy and I think he knew I was crying. "This is your uniform. Please change and leave your clothes at the cell door." He said to me kindly. I nodded and said "Thank you" in a whisper as I picked up the uniform. I was still wearing the county jail uniform. It was an ugly orange color. The new uniform was white with black lettering. Much better, I hate orange. The guard locked my cell and turned his back to me while I changed. Thankfully he is a gentleman. I said, "Okay" letting him know it was alright for him to turn around. He reached down and picked up my old uniform and put it with the rest of my belongings.
After he left, I was thinking about how the guard had a kind gentle way about him and that he treated me so much better than the female guard did last night. I wondered what made him choose this as his career. That got me thinking about how I missed working in the library. The small town of Forks must be gossiping about me and my mother non-stop. My mother was well liked by everyone and Phil had a good reputation in the community, but I was just mousy little Bella. I can just hear them having whispered conversations all over town. None of that matters anymore. I won't ever deal with the townspeople of Forks again.
I got a surprise at lunchtime. I was going to get to eat lunch in the cafeteria. The guard arrived at my cell without jingling those damn keys this time. "Please turn around and place your hands behind your back." He ordered gently. I obeyed and he placed the handcuffs on my wrists. He led me to the cafeteria. Once we were inside and the doors were locked, he unlocked my handcuffs. I rubbed my wrists and looked at the guard for direction. He pointed to the area where they served the food. I took a tray and walked down the line, while the guard waited at the other end. He pointed to a square table in the corner. He followed directly behind me as I walked. I sat down and looked at what passed for food on my tray. Once again disgusting, it was something like Sloppy Joes with mashed potatoes, peas and a brick that is supposed to pass for a brownie. Apparently the guard thought it was disgusting too, because just as I was about to take a bite of the mashed potatoes he said "Those potatoes certainly look good." He smirked at me, he actually smirked at me. I didn't take my eyes off of my food but said, "I think I used the same substance to hang wallpaper." I put a spoonful of potatoes in my mouth, "It tastes like paste anyway." He burst out laughing and asked "So what brings you to a place like this?" He said with a light chuckle. He and I were going to get along just fine. We have the same sense of humor. I couldn't help myself; I was always great with a snappy retort. "My mother's lousy taste in men, and my great taste in furniture." It worked; he looked at me slightly confused. We heard the other guard and his prisoner getting up.
"Sorry Isabella, but I have to take you back to your cell now." He informed me. "Bella" I corrected him. I hate when people call me Isabella. Better to get it out of the way now, since I am going to be here for a while. "Nice to meet you Bella, I'm Edward Cullen." He greeted me warmly. It was nice to have a name to put to the face. Edward had to cuff me again, but he made them a little looser this time. This is the best I have felt since the trial. A person actually treating me like a person means so much. As we approached my cell he told me "I was assigned as your personal guard for your lunch and yard time. I will be back in two hours to take you outside. "Thank you. You are being very kind to me Officer Cullen." I said to him as he locked my cell smiling at me.
The next two hours were the longest yet. I couldn't wait to go outside and if I was being honest with myself I wanted to see Officer Cullen again. Even his name was gorgeous. I know he was just being kind to me and would be the same with any other inmate, but I could almost feel like there was a spark between us at lunch. I also can't wait to get outside. I am not sure what I will do out there alone, maybe Officer Cullen will want to talk a bit. That is more than I can hope for though.
It must be nearly time for Officer Cullen to come and take me to the yard. I don't even have a clock in my cell, and they took my watch to keep in my personal effects. Not realizing that I was doing it at first, I started listening for the jingling of his keys. I was sitting on my bunk daydreaming when I heard "Bella." My head snapped up and I saw Officer Cullen standing at my cell door. "It's yard time Bella." He announced as he opened the cell door. "Hands behind your back again." Officer Cullen instructed me. "Yes, Officer Cullen." I replied. "I'm sorry, but I have to cuff you every time I transport you to a different area." He apologized as he placed the handcuffs on my wrists loosely. "I understand, and I think it's good that you respect the rules. After all, I am a murderer." I said playfully. "I don't know about all that." He said with a smirk on his face. "Officer, do you mean to say that I'm not dangerous?" I asked him and then I quickly stated, "All women are dangerous, or so I've read." He chuckled softly as he stole a glance down the hall at the guard station. "Come on, let's go." He ordered, escorting me out of my cell. He linked his arm through mine and we walked side by side down the long corridor. When we got outside he lead me to an area of the yard designated for prisoners in solitary confinement.
"Hold still while I un-cuff you." Ordered Officer Cullen. "Thank you, Officer." I responded, happy to have the cuffs off once again. "You have one hour." He stated and he stood near the back door. I saw a bench and sat down and I started watching the clouds. I drew in a big breath of the crisp fresh air and was thoroughly enjoying being outside.
After a while I heard Edward sigh, and he walked over to me nervously. "Would you like to sit with me Officer Cullen?" I asked him trying to be polite. "Or is that against the rules?" I added quickly. "Yes, Bella it would be against the rules." He said with a sad tone in his voice. I knew asking the question was a bad idea, but I was still a little hurt. He stood behind me leaning against the fence, while I looked down at my hands. "How does a sweet girl like you end up murdering her mother's boyfriend?" Edward asked breaking the silence. I was shocked that he asked me that question. "I'm not sure how to explain…" I said after a few moments had passed. "Well I have nothing but time, and by the way things look so do you." He said playfully trying to get me out of my shell. "I guess I have to ask what you would do if you walked into your home and saw a man strangling your mother? How would you react to that Officer?" I asked him bluntly. I could tell that he was taken back a bit. "Well, I'm not the one in prison trying to explain myself, now am I? He retorted. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't be like that. I would probably kill the motherfucker." He said in an apologetic tone. "Please excuse my language." He quickly added, looking around the yard.
"Well, that's why I'm here. My mother was my world. Did you know that I couldn't even go to her funeral? Your language is not my biggest problem." My words just seemed to tumble from my mouth all at once. "Please express yourself as you see fit, Officer Cullen." I managed to say once I got some of my composure back. "Thank you, and I think it's awful that they wouldn't let you go." Officer Cullen said sweetly.
"I am grieving for my mother under the worst possible circumstances, Officer Cullen. Please forgive me if I seemed angry." I explained. "I completely understand, and I am so sorry for your loss." He responded kindly. "Thank you, you are the first person to say that to me. It really means a lot." I looked down at my hands again, and I could hear Officer Cullen fiddling with the chain-link fence. I couldn't help it; even though I was trying so hard to hold it together I began to cry softly. I heard Officer Cullen sigh and then I felt him stroke my back to comfort me. I couldn't believe that he was touching me and I swear that I felt that spark again. I put my head in my hands and sobbed harder as I thought about Renee and how much I had truly lost.
"Please Bella, don't cry. I hate to see a woman cry." He whispered to me gently. "I'm sorry." I said with my voice shaking. "Shush." He said softly. "Thirty minutes." He informed me after looking at his watch. "Thank you." I said quietly. I had thirty minutes to pull myself together. "May I call you Edward when we are out here?" I asked without thinking. "I don't know Bella…" He said hesitantly. "It's not that…" he started to explain. "I understand Officer Cullen. It's okay. Really. I shouldn't have asked." I interrupted him. "Look Bella, it's not that I don't want you to call me Edward. It's just that I have to be professional here. "If another guard or inmate heard you calling me Edward or me calling you Bella, it would be a lot of trouble for both of us." He tried to explain. "I realize that I was out of line, please let's just forget it. Really." I pleaded with him. "Don't ever think that it's out of line to ask me anything." He said.
"Is there any activity that you would like to do while you are out here?" He offered. "Could I have a book to read?" I asked knowing I was pushing my luck. He inhaled sharply. "I might be able to swing that." He winked at me. "Oh thank you!" I exclaimed, "Maybe this hell won't be so bad then." I gushed feeling my face redden. I always blushed so easily. "Who is your favorite author?" Officer Cullen inquired. "I absolutely love Stephen King." I told him. "Stephen King, huh? He is one of my faves too. I'll see what I have on my shelf tonight." He said thoughtfully.
"How much do you know about me, Officer Cullen? Did you know I am or I should say was a librarian?" I asked quizzically. He had to know some background information on me and I wanted to be on an even playing field. "Oh, I know a lot about you Bella." He teased me. "Really? Then I should get to know some things about you…to keep things fair." I looked at him seriously. He chuckled. "Well, fair is fair. What do you want to know?" He asked clearly afraid of what my question would be.
"What made you choose to be a prison guard? I asked. "It has to be boring, but a lot of people thing being a librarian is a boring career choice, but I always found it fascinating." I butted in before I let him answer. "Well, I was going to school to become a doctor and the bills became overwhelming. So, I got a part-time job at the local detention center. "The longer I worked there, I realized that I liked being an authority figure." He winked at me. "After awhile I was promoted and I started taking less classes. The next thing I knew I was offered a job at another prison, and I took it." He continued. "The only thing I hated was the drive, so I put in an application to transfer to WSP, and here I am." He finished looking lost in thought.
"Interesting story, Officer Cullen." I pressed further "Where did you grow up and what is your family like? I asked quickly. "Look at the time…it's time I got you back to your cell." He smirked at me, clearly stalling. "Saved by the bell, do I get to continue asking you questions tomorrow?" I asked, still pushing my luck. He furrowed his brow and ran his fingers through his messy hair. "Wait a second, tomorrow should be my turn to ask the questions." He said after a minute or two. "I guess fair is fair. Tomorrow is your turn, Officer Cullen." I conceded, with a smirk. I stood up with my wrists out.
"I'm sorry but it is time to cuff you again." He said. He handcuffed me and linked his arm through mine once again. We walked back to my cell slowly. This has been the best day since my mother's murder." I said in a voice that was barely above a whisper. "Well I'm glad I could be a part of it." He whispered back. He opened my cell door and I walked inside. As he removed the handcuffs I whispered "You talking to me was the reason for it." But I don't think he heard me. He stepped out of the cell and walked slowly back down the corridor.