A/N: Sorry I have been slow on the updates but like I said I do have a three month old.
WARNING: Some Teen Cutting in this chapter… You have been warned
Two long weeks had passed and Dawn still wouldn't talk to Spike. He didn't know how to make her talk to him; she wouldn't even open the door so he could see her. So he would sit outside her door talking to her or reading her his poetry. He didn't care about the looks he got from the Scooby Gang. He would sit there and talk to her for hours just trying to get her to open the door, he missed her. He could hear her breathing and when she would cry it broke his heart, "Come on Dawn open the door." He said through the door. He was standing up with his hands on the door, on the other side of the door Dawn was standing the exact same way. She wanted him to hold her and love her but he was in love with Buffy.
It had always been Buffy, Who could love something that wasn't even a person, who never really existed. She closed her eyes remembering the last thing Spike had said to her before she died; they were sitting in the cave hiding out from Glory. They sat on the floor playing cards, she was safe there. Spike had beaten her at Spades for the ninth game in a row, "Come on Nibblet. I know you're better than this." He teased making her blush. "Spike can I ask you something?" She asked as she started to deal out the new hand. Spike looked at her, a little worried about what she would say; he watched her brush a piece of her brown hair behind her ears. She was biting on her lip making him want to lean over and take it between his teeth and bite. He had to stop himself, he was getting too excited.
"Why does she want my blood?" She whispered not being able to look him in his eyes. She didn't understand why it had to be blood, she knew since she was the key that it unlocked a lot of things but why did she have to die? Spike sighed not wanting to think about Dawn dying, "Cause it's always got to be blood bit, it's life. But I won't let her get to you. You hear me? I promise." He reached out putting his hand on her cheek, feeling the warmth under his cold hand. Dawn reached up feeling the spot where Spike's hand had been. She started to cry again.
Spike could hear her crying and he hated it. He told her good night through the door and went back to his crypt to sleep for the day; as soon as the sun went down he would be back sitting on the floor talking to Dawn. He missed all the talks they used to share. After stripping he climbed into bed closing his eyes.
Dawn sat on the floor of her room with the butcher knife sitting in front of her. She had her sleeve rolled up tracing the scar from Buffy's birthday. She wondered if anyone would care if she was dead again, who would cry? Spike would be happy because then he could go back to Buffy. She looked up seeing the sun was already down, quickly she picked up the knife pressing it into the scar before she started slicing away at the skin. Soft groans escaped her lips as she cut, she watched her blood start to fall to the floor and it reminded her of the tower and how her few drops of blood had opened the gate way. She put the knife down and waited for death to come.
Spike walked into the summer's house and was instantly hit with a wave of Dawns blood in the air. He ran to her room knocking on the door "DAWN?" He yelled banging on the door; he could hear her heartbeat so he knew she wasn't dead. If his heart could beat it would be beating a million miles an hour. He kicked open the door to find Dawn sitting on the floor; he could see the blood from her arm. He picked her head up putting it on his lap before pressing a shirt to her arm "Come on Dawn, your gonna be ok." He said to her. She opened her eyes to find tears running down his cheeks; he smiled at her "Hey bit." He whispered. Dawn reached up touching the tears on his cheeks; she gave him a funny look "Spike why are you crying?" She asked. "Thought I was gonna lose you again bit. Why did you do that?" He pointed to her arm. She looked at him not believing what he said, he didn't say thought we would lose you again, and no he said he would lose her again. She didn't get it; he was in love with Buffy not her. She could smell the cigarettes on him and she buried her face into his chest, it felt safe and familiar to her. He sighed holding her close not caring how he looked he just needed her in his arms, and for the second time he started breathing again.