E's Note:

*this will now be pasted on every chapter from now on*

TFA Fangirls, or Fanboys, or Special Edition- whichever one you're reading, isn't the only one in this series/whatever you want to call them, we have TFA Fangirls, TFA Fanboys, and a Special Edition 5th year story as well. Go check them out! :) Thank you for reading our stories and we hope you liked them!

-E, C, F, N, B, L, H, L, Em

I, Joe Walker, have a problem.

No one, I repeat, no one, came to my birthday party.

Sure, I'm twelve years old. I weighed out my options, and realised that maybe having a birthday party at my age is not exactly the cool thing to do.

But I take pride in not knowing what's cool. That's probably why I have no friends.

Okay, there's Charlie. But Charlie doesn't always count, not in my eyes. But we sat next to each other in orientation, then Charlie sat next to me in the first class, and before I knew it, BAM! We're friends.

I set up the party yesterday morning, so it was ready in time for the afternoon. Put up streamers, set up food, even the gross Korean stuff that Mum wanted. Like, ew?! Who wants to eat noodles and soup for afternoon tea? Not me! And definitely not anyone from school. Besides, Mum can't cook to save her life. Literally. The kitchen's almost burnt down more than once and it was my quick thinking that saved us, not the Korean "delicacies".

Of course, I'm only half Korean. Mum's full born and blooded, but even though she hasn't grown up in Korea, never even been to Korea, she still considers it her heritage. Which means weird food for dinner, every day.

That's the deal. I choose food for lunch, Mum chooses food for dinner. But since the party was afternoon tea, Mum had insisted on half-half. "Maybe that's why they didn't come to my birthday party," I mused. "Maybe someone told them there was gonna be strange food."

Or maybe, said the voice in the back of my head, it was because you didn't invite them. When you post a letter, Joe, you need to put a stamp on it. That's right, I remember now. I'm bankrupt, so when sending out the letters I could only afford one stamp. That letter went to my friend Charlie, and Charlie couldn't come anyway, due to suddenly coming down with the chicken pox.

Lying on my bed, just as the sun began to peek through his blinds, I realised I had to get up sometime. I spoke aloud. "Oh well. The party was yesterday. No one came. I'll get over it." I sighed. "This pep talk sucks. Okay, get up now. Come on, foot, snap awake! It's morning. Get up! Maybe school today won't be so bad. Maybe, she'll fiiinally acknowledge your existence."

I yawned, stretched, and pulled myself out of bed. I walked downstairs for breakfast, with dreamy and maybe slightly inappropriate thoughts of the irresistible fiery year 10 that I was hopelessly crushing on.

"Hey dude, what's up?"

"Hey, Charlie." I slammed down my food onto the almost deserted lunch table. "Aren't you so glad we don't have a cafeteria in our school?"

Charlie rolled his eyes. "Yeah, Joe, I know. You tell me that. Every. Day."

I ignored him. "Yeah, well, it's true! I mean, look at all those American movies-"

"Like Mean Girls?" Charlie interrupted.

"Mean Girls?" I frowned. "What's that- what would I know about Mean Girls? What do you know about Mean Girls?"

"Um, nothing." Charlie didn't meet my eyes. "Go on." He opened his lunchbox, and took out the sandwich.

"Where was I?"

"The American movies."

"Oh yeah. Well, in American movies the schools always have a cafeteria run by grumpy old fat ladies, and they serve food made out of slop. Like, actually. It slops. Onto the tray. And then it slops on the way into their mouth. And then it slops and slithers down their e-so-pha-gus."

"E-so-pha-gus?'

"The oesophagus," I explained. "And then it slips into their stomach. Then it churns round and round and round and finally-"

Charlie held up his hand, effectively silencing me. "Dude. Thanks, but no thanks. I know where the food goes next. And besides, I'm eating." He bit into one half of his sandwich.

I bought out his own lunch, delicious non-Korean food. A perfectly normal chicken egg salad. Minus the lettuce. I hate lettuce.

"Anyway," I said, "I'm just so happy we live in Australia, go to an Australian school, in fact, we're here right now-"

"You don't say."

"-And just have a canteen instead of cafeteria. All sorts of bad things happen in a cafeteria. See, isn't this courtyard lovely?" With this, I threw my hands up in the air, forgetting I was holding the chicken salad.

The contents flew over the brick pavement, salad and all, and then splatted onto the pastel blue school building, one of the maths classrooms, to be exact. Mayonnaise and dressing slid down the wall.

"Don't you dare."

Charlie looked up, stifling a laugh. "I wasn't going to say anything! I swear!"

I crossed my arms, and looked away.

Charlie sighed. "Want half my sandwich?"

"Thanks."

"Hey, is that her?" Charlie pointed across the yard, towards a tall redhead coming out of the canteen.

I looked over. "Oh, yeah. Baby," I sighed dreamily. "Isn't she great?"

Charlie wasn't amused. "Remind me again, who is she?"

"Rachel Elizabeth Dare. Tenth grade. Came to our school two days ago. Fiery red hair, about maybe…170 centimetres. Totally out of my league, but you know," I sighed again. "Who knows?"

"O-o-okay then…that name sounds familiar though…" Charlie speculated, but then realised I hadn't even heard him. "Look, dude. You can't just sweep her away. You haven't even talked to her, have you?"

"Well, no, but-"

"And she's what- sixteen? Sixteen, Joe! That's four years older than you. Four!"

"Four years won't mean nothing when we're legally married."

"What the hell?! Where did that come from?" Charlie demanded.

"It came from my-"

"And stop with the creepy accent!"

Meanwhile, Rachel Elizabeth Dare crossed the yard and sat down at a table about fifteen metres away.

Charlie took a quick breath. "And besides, you only turned twelve yesterday, on Sunday. So really, it's probably closer to a five year difference."

I wasn't listening to a word he said.

"Honestly, I've probably got a better chance than you. I turned 13 in April. And you turned 12 in June, which is literally the youngest you're allowed to be in year seven. Are you even listening? I'm talking to myself, aren't I?"

No response. I was busy ogling the fiery older girl. Charlie sighed.

"Hey, Joe, your salad slid down the wall and landed on Marie-Rose. She's shooting you angry glares," Charlie tried.

Silence.

"Holidays are in ten days." He tried a different tactic. "No school for two weeks. Aren't you excited?"

Silence.

Charlie rolled his eyes. "I think Rachel looked at you."

"Really?!" I asked excitedly.

"No! I was just trying to get your attention. Geez, is that what it takes?" Charlie said. "Anyway, I was just saying that since you had your birthday yesterday, you're even younger then you think you are."

"Birthday? Oh yeah…" I trailed off, and started thinking. "Hang on, didn't you say you had come down with the chicken pox? And that's why you couldn't come to the party, hmm?" I narrowed my eyes.

"Whaaat?" Charlie said, way too loudly. "Don't be ridicu- Did I say the chicken pox? I meant, um, a cold. Achoo." Charlie looked as awkward as a deer trapped in the headlights.

"The flu. Really."

"Yep!" Charlie crossed his arms. "Really. But I've had a miraculous discovery, so I'm good now."

"You are, are you?"

"Uh-huh. As well as a whale."

I frowned. "I don't think that's a saying."

"It is now."

"You are so stubborn, you know that?"

"No I'm not." Charlie paused. "Oh wait."

Just as we were speaking, Rachel Elizabeth Dare stood up, and walked out of the courtyard, obviously finished eating.

I glared at Charlie. "Now look what you've done!"

"What? How does that even- How is that my fault?"

"Chill out, dude. I was just joking," I laughed. "So, why'd you skip the party?"

"Hey, I wasn't-" I gave Charlie The Look. "Okay, maybe. Come on, it's embarrassing to be seen in public with you, okay? And if anyone actually turned up, it would've just been really awkward. I don't do awkward moments."

"I was alone." I stated. "All. Alone."

"Look, I'm sorry."

"By myself. ALONE."

"I won't do it again. Sorry, again. You know I wouldn't ditch you if it was something actually important. Like, moving schools or something."

I smiled. "Yeah, I know. Don't worry, I wouldn't ditch you either."

We both looked at each other for a moment, our lunch forgotten.

Charlie rubbed the back of his neck. "Okay, can we stop now? This is getting awkward. I'm not good with heart to heart moments."

I laughed. "Yeah, me neither. But remember, it's only awkward when you make it awkward!" I sang.

"Yeah, that might be true. But you just made it awkward."

Students began finishing their lunch. All around us, the chatter of the playground never ceased.

"She's just not your type, you know." Charlie stated, referring to Rachel Elizabeth Dare.

"Oh, then who is? Someone non-Korean? RACIST!" I cried.

Charlie held up his hands in mock-surrender. "Hey, that's not what I meant!" He smiled. "I just meant someone you know, a bit more muscular? Like me, perhaps?"

I snorted. "Pfft, of course. Because you totally work out every day."

Charlie grinned. "Yes, I do." Then he thought for a moment. "Hey, I thought you weren't fully Korean."

"I'm not. Only Mum is."

"Then what about your dad?"

"He's, uh, oh right, I forget you've never met him." I paused, thinking whether to say the next part or not. "Don't feel bad, I haven't either."

"What do you...?" Suddenly Charlie realised. "Oh."

I nodded. "Yeah."

"I- I'm sorry, mate."

"Don't be." I shrugged. "As I said, I've never met him, so there's nothing for me to be missing/ Mum won't really talk about him. But, I'm pretty sure he just took off."

Charlie swallowed, and reach for his sandwich, then remembered he'd finished it earlier. "Why didn't...why didn't you tell me earlier? We've known each other since the beginning of high school, which is like half a year."

I shrugged again. "It never came up. Anyway, uh, mum mentioned once that he was Australian."

"Technically he's English." Charlie stated.

"What?"

"I said, technically he's English." Charlie saw the opportunity to change subject, so he took it gladly. "You know? We did this in history."

"We did?"

"Yeah." Charlie rolled his eyes. "Oh that's right, I forgot. You don't listen in history. You sleep."

I smiled. "You got me."

"Anyway, what I was saying. Australia was colonised in the 1700's by the English. Before that, the Aboriginals had been there for thousands of years. So technically, the Aboriginals are really Australians. The rest of us, are just however-many-generation English. That makes you half-Korean and half-English."

"English?" I screwed up my face. "Gross. I don't wanna belong to England, all it does there is rain."

Charlie laughed. "Yeah, true."

"Who would wanna live there?" I folded his arms. "Not me, at least. I'm happy staying in Australia for the rest of my life."

And with that, the bell went. We both stood up, packed up our lunch, and started towards class.

"Pssst."

Students bustled down the hallway. Walking and weaving, the small and rather crowded school corridors were more like trying to navigate through Asian traffic than just walking down a hallway. It was so bad, the teachers expected us to be at least five minutes late to class each day.

And I could've just sworn that someone had tried to whisper to me.

I whipped his head around, accidentally elbowing a senior. "Year sevens'," she said, clearly frustrated, but luckily she kept moving.

Had someone tried to say something to me? I cocked my ear, listening for more, but there was nothing. I kept walking, almost at the maths classroom.

"Pssst. Hey, Joe." I frowned. So I definitely heard something. I turned around, but no one was paying me any attention.

"Hey Charlie, did you hear something?" I asked.

"Hear what?"

"Uh, never mind."

Charlie looked slightly concerned, but didn't say anything.

And then suddenly the mysterious voice spoke again, barely louder than a whisper. "Joe. Joe Walker. I'm talking to you. Pay attention!" It sounded like a girl's voice, which was strange. No girl would ever be caught talking to me.

And was it...? No, it couldn't be. It couldn't be coming from the nearby cupboard. That was ridiculous.

"Charlie, keep going without me." I decided. "I'll be along in a second. Save me a seat."

"What?" Charlie asked. "Okay, but hurry up. You don't want to be too late. It's maths with Ms. Sunshine, and you know how angry she gets." Charlie looked like he was going to say more, but before he could he was bustled away by the never-ending crowd of students.

I started towards the cupboard. Sure, this was ridiculous but I had to try, right? If nothing more than just to prove I wasn't going crazy.

In hindsight, maybe it was a bad idea. Now I look back on it as the incident that started everything

I felt the handle of the cupboard, took a deep breath, and then looked around. No one was looking at me, they were all just trying to get to class.

I opened it, and before I could say another word, slim hands reached out and grabbed my arms, quickly pulling me into the dark, dark closet. A cloth covered my mouth, and in a few dizzy moments, the world turned to black.

I woke up to someone staring down at me.

"Hello? Oh good, you're awake." The hazy figure (girl?) said. I blinked a couple of times; my vision was all weird. "Whew, thank god. I thought I'd killed you." She laughed nervously. "Sorry, I'm still new to this."

I just looked at her, my brain still messed up so I didn't catch a word she said. Slowly, I realised I was lying on the ground. Her features came into focus: red-brown frizzy hair, and green eyes. Oh yeah, the year ten girl. Then suddenly my brain registered what she'd said.

"Wait, whaa? Ya keeled me? I don geddit." I stumbled over the words. Oh god, I sounded like I was drunk. My tongue was swollen, although I didn't know why.

"Yeah, sorry. Chiron said I had to get you alone somehow, and since you're always with that other kid it proved difficult. Sorry about the, you know, chemical cloth over mouth though. Don't worry, the side-effects will lessen after a few days."

My head was still woozy, so I didn't register everything she said. "Kai-ron? Who's that?" Then I frowned, and suddenly I was wide awake. "Wait! Did you say side-effects?"

The girl waved a hand dismissively. "Don't worry, it's not that bad. Oh! I forgot to introduce myself." She stuck out a hand. "Hi, I'm Rachel Elizabeth Dare! Nice to meet you."

I slowly put my hand out too, thinking she was going to shake it, but instead she pulled me up into a standing position. "Joe Walker," I said, "But I think you already knew that." Then my brain made the connection. "Rachel Elizabeth Dare? Oh, I know you. You're that tenth grader girl." I didn't dare say anything else. "Hold on, where are we? And why did you drag me into a closet?!" I demanded.

I looked around for the first time. Exercise mats lay in one corner, and the room was large enough for a game of basketball. The only windows were up high, and then I realised.

"This is your gym," Rachel confirmed. "And I bought you here because, how do I put this… well, you're not entirely normal."

"I'm perfectly normal!" I protested.

"Really? The two lumps on your head?" She asked.

I put my hand on my head and felt the two stumps, hidden under my hair. "Results of a near fatal bathtub accident," I said, repeating what mum's told me. I don't remember it, but it happened when I was young. Don't ask.

"And the fact that you can't run properly? That your feet are shaped weirdly?" The way Rachel spoke was like a rapid-fire machine gun, constantly shooting questions at him.

"I was born with a missing bone in both feet." I said. How come she knew so much about me? This was just weird.

Rachel Elizabeth Dare's expression suddenly softened, as if she were regretting what to say next.

"I don't know how to say this, but…" She took a deep breath. "You're not just half Asian, Joe. You're half goat."

For a moment I couldn't say anything. Okay, this girl was officially crazy.

"I know you don't believe me, Joe. But just take off your shoes, and look at your feet. Like, actually look."

I was annoyed, angry, even. Who did this girl think she was? First she kidnaps me, then makes fun of my feet, then insults my vision. There was no way I had a crush on her anymore.

But I took off my shoes, anyway. I wanted to prove her wrong. And you know, there might have been that teeny, eeny doubt…

"Fine. But don't think I believe you for one second." I said.

I kicked off my shoes, and peeled off my socks. Okay, so my feet were a bit weird-looking, they were more of a round, stumpy shape than everyone else's. But that didn't mean they were anything to gawk at.

I stared back at Rachel. "See? They're normal."

She sighed. "No, really look. Pretend your toes are an illusion, and your feet aren't really there."

I rolled my eyes, but tried it anyway. And then, suddenly, they began to flicker. My eyes opened wide, as if I were seeing a whole other world. And as I watched, my feet disappeared altogether.

And two mud brown hooves were in their place.

Disbelievingly, I reached my hand down and fingered the hooves. Yes, you heard correctly. Like the ones on a cow. My legs were hairier than I remembered too, almost…shaggy. Like the ones on a goat.

"What the hell is wrong with me…?" I whispered quietly. I looked up at Rachel, her eyes were nothing but pity.

"What in the holy flipping hell is wrong with me?" I half-shouted. "I'm a goat from the waist down. How could I not know this?!"

"The term's satyr, actually." Rachel corrected. "And it's the Mist. It keeps things hidden from mortal eyes, including things to do with your very own self. You believed you were mortal, so the Mist made you believe you were mortal."

"What do you mean, mortal?!" I asked. "And what's this 'mist' stuff that you're talking about?!" I shouted.

Rachel looked at me pointedly. "You'll find out soon enough."

Suddenly, footsteps stomped by outside. Rachel froze. The door squealed open, and someone walked in. Hidden in the shadows, we couldn't be seen, unless the stranger decided to take a better look.

"Joe?" The stranger said. "Are you in here? I thought I heard voices."

I relaxed, well, sort-of. It was just Charlie.

Rachel mouthed the words, 'You know him?' I nodded, but didn't move. He couldn't see me like this.

Charlie walked into sight, looked to the left and then to right, and (damn it) spotted me. "Oh, thank god. Dude, Ms Sunshine's flipping out. She hates when anyone skips, and you've been gone for at least half the lesson-" His eyes widened when he saw Rachel. "No way. No freaking way."

Despite the fact I was in shock, I frowned. "What?" Charlie hadn't seen my feet yet, had he?

"That's…that's Rachel Elizabeth Dare," Charlie said. "You know, from Percy Jackson? Those books I've been trying to get you to read for ages! Oh my god, this is awesome! I knew her name sounded familiar."

I pretended nothing was wrong. I didn't want Charlie finding out about me, when I'd only just found out today. "Oh…so this is all real, huh?"

Rachel nodded. "Sorry, but yeah."

Charlie looked confused. "What do you mean, this is all real?"

I wanted to run, but I couldn't. He'd notice. Rachel looked down at my feet.

Charlie followed her lead, and then his eyes widened. "No way!" He grinned. "That is beyond cool! Joe, you're a satyr?"

"What? No! I mean, yes, apparently." I corrected. "But that's not cool!"

Charlie gave me a duh look. "Yeah it is! Like…god, I would give almost anything to be in your position right now! That's awesome. So, what happens now? Are you-"He addressed Rachel "-Taking him to Camp Half-Blood, or what?"

My head was spinning. "Wait, what? What's this camp thingy?"

Rachel completely ignored me. "No, Joe's a special case. Usually satyrs come to collect the demi-gods, but he's not a demi-god, and that would've been awkward, anyway. He's…okay Joe, here's another shock." She paused. I didn't like the sound of it. "Usually satyrs – half human, half goat, they're from Greek mythology if you're wondering – are the spawn of another satyr and say, a wind spirit."

"So…mum's a wind spirit, then?" I suddenly realised, mum must have known what I was. Why didn't she tell me?

"Uhh, no." Rachel fidgeted uncomfortably. "Thing is, we did some background checks, and your mother is completely human."

I didn't want to hear what she was saying next.

"Which means…your dad is a goat."

I was almost so shocked that I didn't realise Rachel was still talking.

"Don't ask me how it happened, okay? I don't know, and I don't want to know."

Charlie just stood there in shock, and then slowly started mouthing 'so awesome' over and over again.

"But anyway," Rachel said, "we can't take you to camp, like we would with everyone else. You don't really fit in, since you're so…different." I got the feeling she was about to say something else. "Instead, there's this boarding school called The Fandom Academy. Now, it's not ideal, and since you're not a fanboy you might find it a bit strange, but…sooner or later monsters would come after you, and apart from camp it's really the only safe place."

Charlie was dumbfounded. "What about me?!"

"Sorry, but you're just a mortal. Nothing special." Rachel said.

"So are you!" He protested.

"Yeah, but I'm the oracle." She smiled. "Sorry again, I didn't mean for you to get caught up in this, but I guess you deserve to know why your friend is moving to England."

I couldn't think straight. "What?!"

"Yeah, that's where The Fandom Academy is located. Enjoy your last ten days of term, cause when it's over you'll be on a plane to Britain." She winked. "Oh yeah, and here's your letter of acceptance. See ya later, Joe."

Rachel threw an envelope to me, and I fumbled to catch it. When I looked up, she was gone.

And BAM! – That's the moment when my life changed. For better or worse, I was still to find out.