Wow, looks like quite a few have watched the anime 'Danganronpa'. The laugh was inspired by our beary evil bear, Monokuma. Did you know, it was soooo tempting to write 'to make you despair' instead of 'because I can'. Yeah, in fact maybe I should write 2 versions? Meh. Anyway, on with the story!
Deciding not to think more on it, Harry unpaused the game. Once he did so, his Uncle began yelling at him. "Boy what did you do!" Harry just ignored him. At the side, the keeper of the reptile house was in shock.
"But the glass," he kept saying, "where did the glass go?"
The zoo director himself made Aunt Petunia a cup of strong, sweet tea while he apologized over and over again. Piers and Dudley could only gibber. Harry stared fascinated at the two of them. What were they saying? Something about disgusting pale alien snakes and monochrome bears? Shrugging, he continued listening, trying his best to push the murder of Eldrick Lerson out of his mind.
However, technically it wasn't his fault. Besides Eldrick was a AI. A very detailed one, but a AI nevertheless. So, it wasn't really murder. Yup, it couldn't be counted as murder. Feeling lighter now that the kill had been justified, Harry felt happier.
Unfortunately for him, when they got back to the house, Uncle Vermin-Vernon was so angry he could hardly speak. He managed to say, "Go - cupboard - stay - no meals," before he collapsed into a chair, and Aunt Petunia had to run and get him a large brandy.
Lying in his cupboard, Harry chomped on a piece of bacon from his inventory. It was delicious and Harry ate it with relish. Then, opening his menu, he clicked the 'fast-forward option'. Actually, the option was actually a cheat, but who cares? He refused to wait until the Summer Holidays before he would finally be let out of his cupboard.
After using the the fast-forward option, He was finally let out of his cupboard where he spent as much time as possible out of the house, wandering around and thinking about the end of the holidays, where would be going to Hogwarts.
At one point in time, Aunt Petunia took Dudley to London to buy his Smeltings uniform. That evening, Dudley paraded around the living room for the family in his brand-new uniform. Smeltings' boys wore maroon tailcoats, orange knickerbockers, and flat straw hats called boaters. They also carried knobbly sticks, used for hitting each other while the teachers weren't looking. This was supposed to be good training for later life. In other words, they looked like the gentleman he wasn't AKA a moronic imbecile.
As he looked at Dudley in his new knickerbockers, Uncle Vernon said gruffly that it was the proudest moment of his life. Aunt Petunia burst into tears and said she couldn't believe it was her Ickle Dudleykins, he looked so handsome and grown-up. Harry didn't trust himself to speak. He thought two of his ribs might already have cracked from trying not to laugh. In fact, he knew that if he started laughing, he would never stop. Dudley just looked that ridiculous.
There was a horrible smell in the kitchen the next morning when Harry went in for breakfast. It seemed to be coming from a large metal tub in the sink. He went to have a look. The tub was full of what looked like dirty rags swimming in gray water.
He couldn't help but thank every deity that he didn't have to wear it. He refused to wear pieces of old elephant skin. Wait, did that mean he could pass the clothes of elephant skin? Now, that was a thought. However, as soon as he thought it, the grey water flew upwards before forming words.
Hi! Do you miss me?
"Not really" said Harry.
Awww, so cruel to me. Your words wound me. Anyway, I have a new mission for you! If you manage to sell those rags, I will increase your charisma by 2 along with your willpower. I will even give you 100 experience! Though I doubt you'll manage. Upupupupupupupu…
Harry sighed. Looks like he'd be selling those rags. Now, how to go round doing it? Harry decided to pause the game just so he could think. That was when he got an idea. The mission said he had to sell the rags, just not for how much.
Smirking in glee, Harry swiped the rags from the water before going to the master bedroom and switching on the hairdryer. After a while, the clothes finally dried. Then grabbing some of his old clothes, he threw it in the bowl of grey water. He didn't want to be scolded for 'the disappearing rags'. Who would? Now how was he going to sneak out of the house? Perhaps he could use his so called 'Dark Aura'? Would it even work?
Sighing, he decided to try it out. Quickly saving the game, he began to glare at Aunt Petunia. "Aunt Pe-tu-ni-a, can I leave the house?" he said in a sing-song voice while smiling sweetly. Aunt Petunia stared at him in shock before nodding. There was a terrifying visage of a monochrome bear behind him!
Happily, Harry left the house. Walking towards the alleys of Little Whinging, Harry went up towards a homeless guy. "Excuse me, would you like to buy these rags for 5 cents?" The guy stared at Harry as though he was nuts before taking a random 5 cent coin and giving it to Harry. Then grabbing the rags, the homeless guy turned away from Harry.
As soon as he turned away, an arrow flew past Harry and hit the wall besides him. Then the world froze. Harry looked at the arrow before noticing tendrils of smoke forming words.
Cheh! You horrible mean cheater! Looks like I will have to be more specific! You can have your rewards then!
As soon as the last word formed, fireworks shot into the air as the words 'Level Up' appeared in front of him. There was no pompous voice saying it this time. Then, Harry's character screen opened up.
Name: Assassin Harry James Potter (edit)
~LEVEL THREE~
Titles: Boy, Freak, Boy Who Lived
Allies: -NIL-
Health: 28/28
Energy: 12/12
Strength: 11 +1 = 12
Constitution: 11 +1 = 12
Dexterity: 14 +1 = 15
Intelligence: 14 +1 = 15
Wisdom: 14 +1 = 15
Charisma: 16 +2 +1 = 19
Willpower: 10 +2 +1 = 13
Composure: 13 +1 = 14
Magic: 25 +1 = 26
Luck: 27 +1 = 28
EXTRA POINTS: 3
Abilities
Fade: Level 2 (Fade into the background.)
Mask: Level 2 (Composure increases by 50%)
Parseltongue: Level 20 (Can do parselmagic, and speak parseltongue. Note, people who know you speak parseltongue will automatically make your charisma drop by 50% to them.)
Observation: Level 3 (Know all escape routes, the best way to kill someone and know where everyone is.)
Dark Aura (Causes people to get Scared of you.)
Cook: Level 20 (Cook anything you want. Win the world over with your food. World domination sounds nice.)
Compulsion: Level 3 (Make your enemies listen to you. Jump off the building? They'll do it… and with a smile on their face.)
EXTRA LEVEL UP POINTS: 2
EXPERIENCE: 60/150
Looking at the extra points, Harry decided to add to his Constitution, Strength and Luck. As for his abilities, he decided to level up his Compulsion and Fade.
Name: Assassin Harry James Potter (edit)
~LEVEL THREE~
Titles: Boy, Freak, Boy Who Lived
Allies: -NIL-
Health: 28/28
Energy: 12/12
Strength: 13
Constitution: 13
Dexterity: 15
Intelligence: 15
Wisdom: 15
Charisma: 19
Willpower: 13
Composure: 14
Magic: 26
Luck: 29
Abilities
Fade: Level 3 (Fade into the background.)
Mask: Level 2 (Composure increases by 60%)
Parseltongue: Level 20 (Can do parselmagic, and speak parseltongue. Note, people who know you speak parseltongue will automatically make your charisma drop by 50% to them.)
Observation: Level 3 (Know all escape routes, the best way to kill someone and know where everyone is.)
Dark Aura (Causes people to get Scared of you.)
Cook: Level 20 (Cook anything you want. Win the world over with your food. World domination sounds nice.)
Compulsion: Level 4 (Make your enemies listen to you. Jump off the building? They'll do it… and with a smile on their face.)
EXPERIENCE: 60/150
After he confirmed all his points, another screen popped up.
SPECIAL ABILITIES
Dance (Show everyone those moves of yours. Dance the night away! Every assassin needs this skill to get close with their target and KILL them.)
Irresistibility (Get your target to love you before... )
Cackle (Scare all your enemies. Make them FEAR you.)
Wandless Magic (Use your magic to shock those backwards, useless, wand-waving wizards.)
SPECIAL POINTS: 1
Sighing, Harry debated between Cackle and Wandless Magic. Wandless magic was very useful since if he lost his wand, he would be screwed. On the other hand, Cackle could instill fear into his relatives thus letting him do whatever he wanted. This truly was a dilemma.
Sighing, he decided to use his special point on Wandless Magic. He could always Compel his relatives. Wait, compel? He was a moron. He should have compelled his aunt earlier. Harry wanted to bash his head on the nearest wall.
Name: Assassin Harry James Potter (edit)
~LEVEL THREE~
Titles: Boy, Freak, Boy Who Lived
Allies: -NIL-
Health: 28/28
Energy: 12/12
Strength: 13 +2 +3
Constitution: 13 +1
Dexterity: 15 +2
Intelligence: 15
Wisdom: 15
Charisma: 19 -1
Willpower: 13 +1
Composure: 14 +8.4 +2 +4
Magic: 26
Luck: 29
Abilities
Fade: Level 3 (Fade into the background.)
Mask: Level 2 (Composure increases by 60%)
Parseltongue: Level 20 (Can do parselmagic, and speak parseltongue. Note, people who know you speak parseltongue will automatically make your charisma drop by 50% to them.)
Observation: Level 3 (Know all escape routes, the best way to kill someone and know where everyone is.)
Dark Aura (Causes people to get Scared of you.)
Cook: Level 20 (Cook anything you want. Win the world over with your food. World domination sounds nice.)
Compulsion: Level 4 (Make your enemies listen to you. Jump off the building? They'll do it… and with a smile on their face.)
Wandless Magic (Use your magic to shock those backwards, useless, wand-waving wizards.)
EXPERIENCE: 60/150
Once this was done, Harry unpaused the game and made his way steadily back to his relative's house.
Done. This chapter is over. Sigh, my birthday is tomorrow (05/10) and I have exams! Where is the fairness in that? Oh yeah, would you prefer long chapters that take a longer time to update (1 week) or short ones-like now (1-3 days)?