TC Stark: So I'm so happy so have gotten two reviews for the past chapter! It's always great to see a familiar face! Rin the Grudge Lady, I'm so happy you have confidence in my writing to keep reading. I'm slowly, but surely still working on my Loki story so you should check that out too =D Also SweeneySparrowJokerLove, your review really made me smile. I've always loved Crane and I'm so glad that you like mine so much. I hope I continue to keep the character true to himself and you approve of my story. Your reviews help me so much and if there's any ideas you have throw them at me!
Disclaimer: I only own Roxanne, Stacy, and Kendall. I wish I owned Cillian Murphy. Wah.
Virginitiphobia- Fear of Rape
Chapter Four
It had been a month since Scarecrow had emerged and unleashed his fury out on Roxanne Downey. Since then Jonathan had done well to submerge himself in his studies. He had read stories he had a thousand times again. Although he was quite aware of the psychology of fear, he studied up on it once again in order to prevent his mind from thinking about what had happened that night.
Honestly I have no idea why you're so sour about this. You wanted to fuck her again; problem solved. She disrespected you. She deserved it.
No one deserves to go through that. Especially her.
Scarecrow scoffed at Jonathan's sense of humanity, having none of that himself. Before that redheaded bitch showed up Jonathan and him worked well together with their goal ahead of them. Now, it seemed as if they were fighting opposing battles. Which really wasn't an idle situation considering the two personalities were occupying the same body.
The only good thing about this down time was that it seemed Batman was off their back. Scarecrow may have hated the time away from the chaos, but it allowed them to gain a little more freedom. Cops didn't look at him suspiciously anymore wherever he stepped and he didn't have to worry about the dark knight staring into his window at night.
It also meant Roxanne didn't visit him anymore. Truth be told Jonathan missed her company. It was nice having someone around with whom he could discuss his theoretical work. The doctor didn't like most people, finding the majority of them annoying and disposable. It was what made his work so easy, having no concern for the fear he was installing in his subjects.
Over the month though he grew tired of his only friend being Scarecrow. I'm not that bad.
If you hadn't pulled that little stunt she'd still be here.
Oh, please. She was going to leave eventually. Think about it, Johnny, she's 25 and hot as hell. She goes out to clubs with her friends and is working for Jim Gordon. And what are you? 35. You may have those pretty boy looks, but you have no friends and spend your time trying to figure out how to render people helpless. You think she could show you off to her friends? Besides, she hated the fact you never opened up to her.
What are you talking about?
She blabs on and on about herself and you have never once told her shit. You've never told her where you were born, what your parents were like; nothing.
Jonathan stood stationary in his kitchen with a mug of coffee in his hand. The other was on his hip as he stared off into nothing. Every time he closed his eyes he envisioned Roxanne underneath him, withering in pain and despair. He remembered the time Batman had sprayed his own toxin in his face and the way the fear froze him. He had thought knowing exactly what his toxin felt like would help him make an even better formula to use during his tests, but he never wanted to use it towards that.
Why are we here?
I'm going to make things right.
This is going to be interesting.
Jonathan sighed while buttoning up his suit jacket, stepping towards the large secretarial desk. Kendall was an intern around Roxanne's age who wasn't really that good, but since they liked her personality they made her a secretary. It didn't really matter, she wasn't looking to become a psychologist rather get college credits.
Snapping her piece of bubble gum, the blonde lifted up her head after hearing the heel of his shoes click towards her. Her blue eyes widened as she stood up straight and cleared her throat, "D-Doctor, Crane, w-welcome back to Arkham."
Nodding in acknowledgement, the doctor coldly commanded, "Buzz me in and let them know I will be visiting my therapist."
"Y-Yes, sir." Kendall nodded feverishly as she reached for the phone, punching in some numbers. He didn't pay attention, nor could care less what she was saying to the head of the asylum. He would have loved to see the look on the Dean's face when the intern explained the situation to him. It was a tad depressing see as he once ran this asylum and now he had to ask permission to step through the doors.
Eventually Kendall placed the phone down, nervously looking up at him before explaining that in order for him to be let in he would have to be escorted by guards. Honestly it was pathetic, did they think two large men in white coats would stop him from causing mayhem? He could easily bring this whole asylum to its knees; he was the best thing that institution had ever lost.
Still he complied as he was escorted through the halls, seeing a mixed reaction from the inmates. Since the inmates had ripped the asylum practically to shreds they changed a few things. Many of the cells were behind glass rather than a small room behind a steel door with a small window. The idea was to expose everyone to each other. He thought this idea was ludicrous seeing as many of the inmates were paranoid schizophrenics who didn't like being exposed very much. The only smart thing they did was keep rooms to which the inmates would have one on one with their therapists without everyone seeing and hearing.
As the two guards guided him towards the elevator, Dr. Harleen Quinzel was escorting the Joker back to his cell. There was no disputing that this villain was truly insane. Whereas Jonathan wanted to use his fear toxin to not only study its effects, but also make a profit; the Joker did this all for fun. There was no logic to as why he caused all the chaos he did, just that he did.
"Johnny-boy!" Joker giggled happily, his body moving excitedly under his straight jacket, "My two favorite people!"
The scarred man always had a habit of acknowledging Jonathan other personality, which Scarecrow appreciated. The blonde doctor smiled while touching upon the Joker's shoulder, "C'mon, Mr. J, time to go back to your cell."
"Awww, but, Harley! I was chatting with my friend." He whined.
Jonathan sighed and rolled his eyes, "I'm sure we'll be chatting again real soon."
Joker winked with a large grin, which always creeped him out a little. Still he managed to give a crooked smile before turning to step back into the elevator. It was evident that the management of Arkham really liked Roxanne and were planning on hiring her soon. Since that was the case they gave her a small empty office on the bottom floor to make her feel more at home and also to do her work in.
When they arrived at the office, one of the large men knocked on the door to alert Roxanne. She opened the door and stared straight into Jonathan's eyes; there was no sign of emotion of her face. She turned to the men and told them she wished to talk with the doctor in private despite the men's forewarning.
Roxanne's office was small and cold. There was a single desk and one small couch. The simplicity of the room was maddening and he wondered how such a vibrate personality could be contained in such a desolate space. Still, he supposed as an intern she would consider this all very exciting. He wanted to tell her desperately that Arkham was corrupt and that she would never get out of this small room.
She wasn't saying a word; her back was facing him as she seemed to be stacking some papers together on her desk. He thought it best not to speak first, standing in silence. He couldn't help but think about how lovely she looked with her curly red hair up in a loose ponytail, a long black and grey striped turtleneck, and black form fitting pants with a pair of boots over them. He never noticed that without her usual four inch heels, she was shorter than 5'7".
Finally she turned around and leaned against her desk, arms folded. She wasn't happy to see him and by the look on her face she hadn't forgotten that night. His full lips frowned, still not being the one to speak first. His throat was drying and he was slowly forgetting the whole real why he had come back to the asylum in the first place.
"It's…been a month," Roxanne started, craning her neck to the side, "What can I help you with?"
She's a bitter bitch.
Shut up.
Sighing, Jonathan cleared his throat, "When I entered grad-school, it was the first time away from my family. I was extremely excited to get away from all those who had bullied me in high school and to be around those equal to my intellect."
Why are you telling her this?
She needs to hear it. I…need to say it.
Roxanne loosened her body for a moment, focusing her attention on him, "Barely standing at 5'9" you could imagine I wasn't very popular with women. I had only a handful of sexual experiences before then and was very naïve. I had met Jessica and was instantly attracted. She showed interest back and pretty soon I dove into a relationship with her," He bit his lower lip, sighing again, "I didn't know she had in fact another boyfriend; Ron. We found out about each other the night he walked in on us having sex. Jessica quickly convinced Ron I was some nerd taking advantage of her intoxication.
"It wasn't long after I was studying for an exam I had the following day that Ron came into my room. He was a large guy and I was easily over powered. Not to mention he brought four of his boys with him. He taunted me, called me a pervert. Ron was going to teach me a lesson about taking advantage of others."
Stop it. Stop it! Shut your fucking mouth!
Jonathan ignored Scarecrow as he gripped his fist together before going on, "I tried to scream, even tried to get away. But, I didn't have a good punch at that time," His eyes seemed to glance off to the side, as if remembering something he hadn't in years, "They shoved a sock in my mouth and held me down as…as Ron raped me."
You son of a bitch!
Roxanne's mouth hung open as she slowly started to unfold her arms, shocked at what she had just heard. She may have taunted him by asking crudely if he had ever taken it up the ass, but she would have never thought that would have been the actual case. She wasn't sure what to say; a part of her was angry at what had transpired a month ago. But, at the same time she was thankful he had finally opened up to her.
"Scarecrow soon emerged in my mind and a week later I managed to slip a large dose of LSD in Ron's drink at a party. It may have been a crude start to my work with fear hallucinogen, but the drug was so powerful he ended up locking himself in a closet screaming and tore all his hair out."
"Jo…Jonathan…I" Her mouth still hung open, flabbergasted, "I don't know what to say."
"Nothing," He spoke, "I just…wanted you to know that about me. And that I'm sorry for what had happened."
Gripping the sides of her desk, her breath was caught in the back of her throat as she looked away. He frowned, seeing that she was still hesitant about talking to him, "Did…did you ever get your date with Bradley?"
Roxanne looked back at Jonathan with a weak smile, "Yea. I told some lie that I was mugged. Seeing as this is Gotham, it was plausible. We went on a date, it was nice. But, all he wanted was sex."
"And you didn't?"
"I'm a victim of sexual abuse, Jonathan; I can't have random sex with a man I barely know. I met him at a coffee shop, I knew nothing about him."
The doctor looked on her curiously, "But, you had sex with me."
At this Roxanne gave a small smile, "I know you. And I've enjoyed my time with you. It was different."
Jonathan stood speechless for a moment before straightening himself up, "Well…thank you. I suppose. I-I really shouldn't have been so jealous. Having another personality like Scarecrow and being jealous can be dangerous."
Why are you apologizing for my actions? Don't forget who got you through your grad-school years.
I'm a rape victim, why would I want to put anyone else through that?
"I can tell," She gave a small warm smile; "I've just never been on a date before. And I wasn't sure what the protocol was and-"
"I'm work. I understand. How was the date before he tried to get in your panties?"
Roxanne laughed while scratching the back of her neck, "Um, nice I suppose. We ended up going to a small Italian restaurant. It wasn't bad, but he really didn't have an interest in what I do and I really wasn't interested in his sports column. I also felt a little, um, embarrassed? I was dressed up and he really wasn't. I don't know if that's something I should be upset about, but it didn't leave a good taste in my mouth."
See the Pandora's Box you've opened up? You fuck her once and already she wants to be wined and dined like a princess.
Oh, you would be the first to admit men don't dress well anymore. It's pathetic.
"My first date slapped me because I didn't know I was supposed to pay."
The redhead couldn't help, but let out a laugh. Jonathan soon followed as he remembered being fifteen and naïve. With his parent's allowance all he was able to even afford back then was a hamburger from a fast food place. Still, his date at the time certainly wasn't happy as she was three years older than him and knew how those things were suppose to go.
She couldn't help, but enjoy hearing the doctor's lighthearted laugh, knowing it was something he didn't often do, "After I moved out of Aunt Stacy's I moved in with this girl I worked with at a small ice cream shop. Her parents were drug addicts. We lived together for two years and I guessed she assumed I was gay since I never brought a man home. Long story short she tried to make a move and became…a little crazy. She just couldn't understand no. I had to move out."
Jonathan became lost in his thoughts for a moment. It was surprising that they could pursue sexual relationships after being abused. While he was Roxanne's first sexual encounter with a man, she had clearly attracted others in the past. He wondered if every time a woman approached her if she experienced flashbacks of what happened with Aunt Stacy.
It had taken a while for Jonathan to put what happened to him in the past. For a long time he tossed and turned in his bed, his mind filled with nightmares of what happened. It took him a while to even forget the actual feeling of his rape, experiencing it only in flashbacks after that. With the help of Scarecrow he used his experience to fuel his studies in fear and seek vengeance. His relations with women were few and far in between and a lot of them were a result of his other personality.
Shaking out of his own thoughts, he tucked his hands into his pockets before asking, "If…you don't mind, you still haven't been to Tao and…I quite like sushi, so perhaps I can take you?"
Are you asking her out on a date? After what happened?
"Are you asking me out on a date?"
"Well, I don't see why not. I don't regard our previous date at the Tower proper and there will be a lot of my old bosses there that I'm looking forward to seeing their faces," He smirked, "Besides, if Gordon finds out about it, then you can just tell him you're watching over me."
She's never going to say yes.
Shut up.
You've been telling me that a lot lately. Don't be so sour, doc.
Jonathan growled as Roxanne tilted her head in thought. He couldn't remember the last time he had even bothered asking a girl out, tired of all the idiots who seemed to surround him. Besides that he really had no time to concentrate on women considering his career was more important to him than some dull woman.
"Let's go tomorrow night, I have to stay late here."
You've got to be kidding me.
Jonathan smirked in triumph, "I'll make eight o'clock reservations."
"That sounds great," Roxanne smiled, "I'll escort you out that way you don't have to deal with the body guards."
He nodded, still feeling triumphant over Scarecrow. Before they were able to reach the door, he asked, "Why didn't you tell the commissioner?"
Turning around, she stood still in thought for a moment before replying, "I knew it wasn't you."
Feeling no need to discuss the subject any further, he stepped through the now opened door to be escorting through the halls by the aspiring therapist. He couldn't help but smirk to himself as he followed the redhead, hearing silence in his head. Scarecrow hated being wrong and most of all hated seeing that there was humanity left in the body he inhabited.
As they passed by the Joker's cell, the scarred man stood up out of his seat and rushed to the glass, "Johnny-boy! You've been gone for a while." He winked while giggling.
Both the doctor and Roxanne rolled their eyes. While the Joker was reduced to a clown cracking jokes behind a glass window, he knew that when he broke free of those restraints he was going to unleash a sort of hell onto Gotham city that would make his original attempt look like child's play. His sources told him Harleen was slowly becoming infatuated and it was only a matter of time before Batman's greatest villain had the blonde wrapped around his finger.
Kendall cowered in fear as Jonathan stepped through the doors with Roxanne, turning to smirk, "So, I will see you tomorrow night."
"I'm looking forward to it."
Roxanne smiled as she turned on her heel and stepped back into the asylum. She didn't get very far as the Joker beckoned her forward, "No, Joker, I don't want to see a magic trick."
"No, no, no," The green haired man cackled while shaking his head, "Just wanted to chat. You gonna be the future Mrs. Crane? I gotta tell ya, ol' doc isn't so bad, but Scarecrow is a hard man to please."
Shaking her head, a security guard much have seen the inmate bothering the young intern as he stepped forward and banged his fist against the Plexiglas to get the Joker to step away. Furrowing her brows, Roxanne scolded, "That's not the way to treat our patients."
He scoffed, "There ain't hope for these lunatics. They'll rot here."
"Ohhh, I can't wait to put a smile on your face." Joke cackled loudly so that the whole floor turned their attention to his cell.
The commotion caused Dr. Harleen Quinzel to march over with a scowl on her face, "Leave Mr. J alone!"
"Mr. J?" Roxanne raised an eyebrow once the security guard left.
"We need to make these patients feel human," The blonde explained in her high pitched voice, "There's no traces of his real name, so I call him Mr. J."
"Oh, my little Harley Quinn!"
Folding her arms, Roxanne tilted her head curiously, "There seems to be a lot of pet naming between you two."
The blonde rolled her eyes, "There's nothing wrong with nicknames, Roxy."
Looking over to the Joker cautiously, she warned in a whisper, "Just be careful, Harleen, remember who you're dealing with."
With that the redhead turned and walked away, leaving the therapist and inmate alone with each other. The Joker winked through the glass as Harley Quinn giggled with a slight blush on her cheeks, making sure to walk away before any of the higher ups could see the flirting between the two. This left the clown to grin sinisterly in his cell; this was going to be fun.