"It is difficult to live in the present, ridiculous to live in the future, and impossible to live in the past. Nothing is as far away as one minute ago." -Jim Bishop

Joe

The holidays had come and past, and a silvery blanket of snow covered the frost bitten February ground.

It had been three months since Seth's birth and about two since Jared's. They were both beautiful, healthy, baby boys that hopefully would grow up together here in Bayport and be just as close as Frank and I.

Hope and Biff had decided to have a small wedding with just their parents and close friends. It was to be held at the Morton farm, which Chet had inherited and then sold to the newly engaged couple when he moved to England, to be with his fiancee and her family. Biff had recently bought the local gym and now ran it with Hope and Jamie's help. But we really knew that Jay would never be able to be cooped up here in Bayport for the rest of his life.

Vanessa, with Jared in her arms, and I walked up the front steps of a house we had grown to know well. Frank and Callie had purchased it back when they were first engaged when I was living in Breezy Point. Now it was the meeting place for dinner every Thursday.

"Hello there," Callie said in a cheerful voice as she opened the door. Hope and Biff were already there. Seth was happily bouncing in Hope's arms, the joy was easily spotted on her petite face. We all knew that she was just dying to have a child of her own, but Biff was harder to convince about starting a family.

As we walked in Vanessa handed Jared over to Frank who had grown extremely fond of his little nephew, and treated him like his own son. Immediately chatter started around the room of the weeks events, wedding plans, and how the boys were. It was so easy to talk with all of them, my closest friends, my family. Despite everything that had happened in the past year everyone had stayed the same, not phased by any of it. That is, except for me.

My life had been thrown back into the norm ever since I came home, but despite the deaths of Matt and Roger there was still something haunting me. The past two months had been difficult ones for me, with my marriage to Vanessa and the birth of Jared. I hadn't gotten a good nights sleep for longer than I could remember, and not because of the baby, but because of something much deeper. Frank had noticed my fatigue right away but I told him that it was just the stress of parenthood, which he had to agree with. I hated lying to my friends and family, but even if I did tell them they would think I was crazy.

After I had told him my dream about Jared, Frank seemed unconcerned. That really wasn't like him at all. Very out of character. He just brushed it aside as a regular dream, a coincidence. But I knew it was much more than that. It was a premonition. After that paranoia had become a constant in my life. I tried hard to act normal, with limited success of course.

I was never one to believe in the supernatural. Psychics were just people craving for attention and money, who might have had good luck or were really good at reading people. Never once did I ever think any of it could be real.

In one fatal night, by one dream, I had been turned from a Dana Scully, to a Fox Mulder. Kind of.

I had a whole new life, a new beginning, but yet in some ways it felt like the end. I couldn't tell what was happening in my life half of the time. My mind and thoughts were restless and never seemed to die down. Memories and emotions seemed to come and go as they pleased in me, but I tried my hardest to not let it affect my new life. However irritable I was, I guess I did a good job of hiding it, because no one seemed to notice.

The fact that, of course out of self defense, my brother, best friend, his fiancee, and I had driven two men to their deaths clung in my mind, eating away at my conscience. Two men who had lived civilly in the town of Bayport for over a year, leading everyone to believe that they were good, honest people had finally sunk in. But the guilt was almost too much to handle. However if they hadn't been killed then undoubtedly they would have killed my family and friends, just to hide their tracks. They were scum and needed to be dealt with, but never did I picture myself actually killing one of them.

I felt immense guilt that Matthew Stevenson had to die. He could have turned states evidence against Roger. But his partner had other ideas. I hated Roger for shooting Matt, and I hated him even more after I learned they were actually cousins.

Many things raced through my head, but the one thing that scared me was the dreams I was having. Most of the time they portrayed the events that had taken place in my past, but the strangest nightmares were the ones depicting the future. I don't really know if one would consider that the ability to predict the future, but it sure as hell scared me. Because the things I dreamed about, actually happened. Like I said, premonitions.

And at this very moment in time something was happening inside of me again. It was like someone was slowly making their way into my thoughts. The feeling, the coldness that consumed me right then and their was horrifying, but I held my fear in for the sake of the others sitting around me.

This problem was like a thorn in my side that I couldn't get rid of. Feelings popping up without warming and overwhelming me like this. But then for the first time I saw it. A face, but the features were all black, except for a pair of ominous golden eyes staring back at me. And then my mind went blank and I let out an involuntary shutter and opened my eyes.

"Joe? Are you okay?" Frank's soft voice broke through my musings. I realized that I had totally zoned out on everyone's conversation. But luckily for me, Frank was the only one to notice.

"Yeah, yeah I'm fine," I said rubbing the bridge of my nose with my thumb and forefinger, "just thinking that's all."

"Joe," he began, looking me sternly in the eyes, "Are you sure? Because lately you've been acting...err...well, just not yourself. Is there something you want to talk about?"

"No, no Frank. Really I'm fine," I said trying to be convincing. I then got up, careful not to disturb any of the others, and walked to the kitchen to get a glass of water. Frank followed close behind.

"Joe," Frank said looking me in the eyes again, "Now don't take this the wrong way, but Vanessa and I were talking and, well, has it ever occurred to you that maybe you should see a psychiatrist," Frank paused waiting for my reaction, but then quickly began again before I could object, "I'm only saying this because you've been through a lot lately, and maybe it would help, with your...insomnia, if you could talk to someone. I just thought it might help you get over whatever has been troubling you..." I interrupted before he could finish.

"Frank, there are three things horribly wrong with what you just said," I growled, trying to keep my emotions in order, "First, I will never go see a shrink, and you of all people should know that. Second, I do not have insomnia. And third, nothing has been troubling me," I said, half-truthfully, and then added one last thing with a smirk, "But thanks for thinking of me big brother."

Without another word I left the kitchen and sat back down with my wife and son, as if nothing had happened.

A/N: There you go, and a new story unravels...I hope to see some lovely reviews! Thanks so much!