CHAPTER 4: A NEW LIFE AHEAD OF ME

I sighed as I laid my head against the pillow, staring at the roof, that was whiter than me, and whiter than anything I have ever seen. But thinking about it, I don't really like the color white. I like dark colors. Then a thought accured to me. School is out today, and I have nothing to do. Maybe they would let me paint the room. I stood up, walking into the kitchen, seeing the konan was standing over the sink cleaning a cup out for herself to use. I see deidara forgot to clean the kitchen last night. I thought to myself. Well, everyone including himself, knows that he is in trouble…deep trouble. I giggled to myself, accidentally catching konan's attention. She turned and looked at me like I was some kind of weird person. Like something weird had just walked into the kitchen, but when she noticed that it was just me, she changed the look on her face, to a look of a mother face, when she was concerned about her little girl or something. I sighed, seating myself down at the table. "Do you need some help?" I asked her gently, knowing that she is in a bad mood. She looked at me for one split second, then went back to cleaning not answering my question.

I sighed, I could tell she was upset, and anyone who walked in the kitchen, could tell. Instead of waiting for an answer., I got up grabbing a towel on my way over to the clean dishes that she just washed, and started drying and putting them away. Konan looked up at me, and just stood there. "What are you doing?" She finally asked. I looked up at her, from the dish that I was drying. "I'm helping with the kitchen, because it wasn't even you turn to clean the kitchen, it was deidara's." I said to her. She smiled at me then went back to washing dishes. "Thank you, he does this every time that he is supposed to clean the kitchen. " She said. I looked at her, and then a thought came to my mind. And I smiled. "You know, have you ever thought about punishing him. Because it sounds like he could really be punished for this." I said. There is no sense in the things that he does. He is almost like he is a small child not going by the rules of the house or from his mother or something. The door to the kitchen opened, and speak of the devil, in walked deidara. When he seen me and konan standing here doing the kitchen, he stopped and watched us for a minute before sitting down at the kitchen table. That made me angry.

He was quiet that's for sure. Then when he spoke we both jumped, thinking that he wasn't going to say anything. "When is my turn to clean the kitchen?" He asked. Then, konan just snapped, and turned to face him. " Your turn was lat night, you stupid prick, that's why we are doing the kitchen now, YOU IDIOT!" She screamed at him, and then walked over to him, more like stomping over too him, and smacking him as hard as she could, causing his head to twist a little bit. Deidara, held his cheek and looked at her, then down at his lap. You could tell that he felt guilty for not doing the kitchen. I understood why konan was so upset though, I mean really, how hard is it to remember to do the kitchen one night out of the week? The guy really must be stupid.

I sighed, when he left the kitchen. I looked over at konan, who's face was redder than a tomato. I didn't want no one to be fighting, because I really don't like fighting or drama. So I decided to calm things down, before she decided to follow him to his room. "Well, maybe now he will remember to do the kitchen next time, People always learn from there mistakes." I spoke quietly, but loud enough for her to hear me. She turned and looked at me, letting out a deep sigh at the same time. "Yeah, I hope he does, because this is his first time forgetting about the kitchen, and I really don't want it to happen again. I hate having to do extra work. And thanks for helping me." She said back to me. I smiled, knowing that I did a good job in calming her down. Even though I never really knew that I could calm people down, because every time I would try to calm my mother down, it would only make her madder.

I smiled to myself, walking to my room, going to do my homework. I quietly walked in my room, and shut the door behind me, locking it. I sat down at my desk, pulling my ipod out and my math book. I turned the song try sleeping with a broken heart. by Alicia keys on, turning it all the way up, so I could concentrate on my homework. I smiled when I finally finished an hour later, and then pulling my note book out to write some poetry. The poem I'm working on now goes like this:

BROKEN.

I walk a thousand miles, everyday,

In search for you, in hopes to find you,

Maybe one day you will walk into my life,

Things would be so much easier,

But when you did,

You were gone the second that you came in,

And what does that leave me with,

A broken heart.

Pain that I cant handle,

That I try so hard to get rid of

I'm broken

Faded away darkness only shows.

Its like nothing is there to help me anymore.

Its like I am meant to be alone.

Like no one wants me to be around.

Nothing but a single soul,

Gliding in the clouds,

From up above,

Cant be sent back down.

Cant be pulled back in.

Wont be open up to any one anymore,

don't want to love again.

I knew the poem was lame, and that it was not that good. But no one would read it, because I don't like other people reading my poems. I closed my notebook. And put it back in its hiding spot that way no one can find it, when ever I have someone over here. I sighed, laying back on my bed, putting my ipod away, knowing the battery was going dead. Then someone knocked on my door. I opened it and seen konan standing there. I smiled at her. She smiled back. "Dinner is done. Come and eat." She said cheerfully. I was confused. Since when is she so cheer full. I walked out of my room closing the door behind me, and walking into the dinning room. I felt very ember rest, when I noticed that everyone was already in here waiting on me. I looked down at the ground hiding my blush, and sat down in the seat that was left, which was, ironically, by deidara.

It was an uncomfortable dinner, since the fact I knew deidara didn't like me very much. Every time we tried to have a conversation we would end up arguing about something stupid, and maybe, sometimes something very important. Not once have we had a descent conversation without arguing. I slowly put food on my plate, my favorite kind of food actually. It was spaghetti and meat balls. I put a bite in my mouth, and slowly chewed. Savoring its tasteful taste. I loved this place. When I lived with my mom, I never had anything like this before. We always had sandwiches, or went to a nasty restaurant to eat something. Something cheap. That's how it always had been. I finished my food last, considering I was the last one to start. I stayed at the table after every one left, and konan stayed in there with me. "Are you ok? You seem a little depressed." She asked me. I looked at her and sighed. I didn't really know what was wrong with me, but I did feel I little bit depressed.

I sighed again, looking up at her. Trying to stay calm. "I really don't know, I just feel…alone. Depressed. I don't know why, I just feel like… like I'm missing something. Like I did something wrong, ya know." I said quietly, trying to keep myself in control, and not crying. She stared at me for a minute before speaking to me quietly. " I know what you need." She said excitedly. I looked at her astonished. "What do I need?" I asked her curiously. It still amazed me how excited she could get over such little things and things that are not important. "A girls day out. Now get dressed, we are going to do some shopping." She said. Before I could say anything about not going because I don't like shopping ( technically I have never done it in my life), she was already out the door and it was closed. I sighed, and stood, standing in front of the mirror, staring at myself. My long blonde hair fell over my face, and my green eyes looked tired. I was disgusted of my reflection in the mirror. I pulled out a random outfit from the closet and through it on.

I slowly made my way down the stairs. Konan wasn't down yet, so I decided to wait on the couch. I sat there silently, hoping no one would come down. I heard a loud noise, and then konan came running down, grinning. I knew she did something she was not supposed to, it showed clearly on her face. Right before we walked out the door, I heard pein yell, "KONAN!" She grabbed my hand and ran down the street dragging me with her, and all the while laughing at the same time.