A/N Hi everyone! *hides behind pillar* Sorry this update's taken so long. I've been doing summer stuff. I'd like to give another big thanks to everyone who reviews, follows, and favorites this story. Not only do the email alerts brighten my day, but they also motivate me to get off my butt and write.

Guest #1 Haha poor Steve may have been given great looks, but he still has that inability to interact with women.

Guest#2 Thank you so much! I love to add humor to the story because humor makes everything better. And poor Steve had a bout of depression I'm sure. The deleted scene of him and the waitress really moved me, he's just sitting in the cafe with the saddest look on his face, and he's totally lost. If you haven't seen it you should check it out,it really adds depth to his character. It will be making an appearance in this story as well!

Chapter 4: Hashtag Clueless

That was without a doubt the most embarrassing experience of his life.

Steve opened the door of the At&t store, and walked out with his head down, trying to hide the redness in his cheeks.

He realized he had to go and purchase a cellular telephone, or cell phone as most people call them, in order to contact Fiona. He first made the mistake of calling his regular phone company and asking how he could set up texting, and the saleswoman almost died laughing. As she gasped for air, she told him that you can only text with cell phones, and asked him how in the world he wasn't aware of that. After she resumed laughing, Steve realized that he wouldn't be getting anymore helpful information from her and hung up. Steve sat at his kitchen table with his palms covering his face and sighed. He was a complete laughingstock in this decade. People used to make fun of him for his scrawny appearance before he received the serum, but nobody had thought he was stupid. It wasn't a good feeling at all.

After he was done sitting there wallowing, he set out to find a store that sold cell phones. Pictures of them are plastered everywhere so they wouldn't be difficult to find. After passing a Pinkberry, and a few Dunkin Donuts restaurants, he noticed a store called AT&T advertising the newest iPhone. He shrugged and walked inside, instantly overwhelmed at the copious rows of devices. Luckily for him an eager salesman quickly approached him.

"Hello sir, how can I help you today?"

Steve looked around the store sheepishly. "Um..I'm looking for a cell phone."

The salesman wasted no time starting his sales pitch. "What kind of phone did you have in mind sir? We have the newest iPhone that just came out last month. Or if you're not an apple person we have several Android models."

Steve looked at the man with a confused expression. "What does fruit have to do with cell phones?"

The employee laughed, clapping Steve on the shoulder. "You're real funny man." he said, smiling at Steve. "But seriously, do you prefer iPhones or Androids?"

"I...just want something with texting." Steve stammered out.

"Well of course!" the man laughed again. "What other reason is there for buying a cell phone?"

'To make calls?' Steve thought. 'I would think that was the main point of one. It is called a telephone'

The AT&T guy led Steve over to the various rows of cell phones. He pointed to one with a glass screen. "This is our newest model of the iPhone." he explained excitedly. "It has 8 GB of storage space for all your pictures, music, and emails. You also get a high bandwith for your internet service, depending on the plan you get of course. You have a choice of 500 minutes to unlimited talking time, and of course a texting plan."

Steve had no idea what an email was, or how he would be able to get his records to fit inside that tiny thing, but he only cared about the texting part.

They continued to walk around as each phone was described to him until Steve stopped next to a small Nokia flip phone. He peered at it curiously. "What does this one do?"

The Nokia was sneered at. "Nothing special really. Basic talk and texting. It doesn't even have a qwerty keyboard, you have three letters on one button! And forget about trying to use the internet on that thing, you'd be there all day! That phone gives me awkward middle school flashbacks. Damn old fashioned dinosaur."

Ignoring the man's disdain, Steve looked at the phone fondly. Not only was it hundreds of dollars cheaper, it had what he was looking for, with none of the extra stuff he didn't need.

"I'll take this one." he said happily.

The salesman gawked. "What could you possibly like about that one? Like I said you'll never be able to surf the web with it."

"That's alright, I'm not a big fan of spiders." Steve said.

"Seriously?" The guy handed him the Nokia box and walked away shaking his head.

Walking up to the cash register, Steve ignored the odd looks and stifled giggles of the other customers browsing through the phones. He placed the Nokia on the counter, pulling out his SHIELD credit card to pay for it. The cashier handed him his receipt and told him to have a good day.

"Wait." Steve said hesitantly. "How do I use this?"

To his utter embarrassment, the cashier started laughing also. "You seriously don't know how to use a flip phone?" his voice was full of disbelief. "I had one of those when I was ten years old."

Steve fought the urge to put his baseball cap on, and pull the visor over his face as he left. Luckily he was stopped by an old man. "I can help you with that son." he offered, taking the phone from Steve's hand. "It's real simple once you get used to it. My daughter finally convinced me to get one after 70 years. I never needed it before, but it sure is convenient."

The kind man showed Steve how to place calls, add contacts, and text simple messages. Steve offered his thanks and shook the man's hand as he started to leave the AT&T. He was feeling a lot better, until the elderly man called after him and kindly told him that the web was a term used for the internet, it was a web of information. He also imputted his number in Steve's phone, offering to get a beer sometime.

Embarrassed with himself, Steve waved and opened the doors to the shop, dejectedly stepping outside.

Unbelievably thankful it was all over and he was now in possession of a texting device, he pulled out his wallet, retrieving the reciept Fiona had wrote her number on. He sat down on a bench, and slowly input it into his contacts. It wasn't easy, as he would push the keys too many times in a row, or not wait until the current letter was un-highlighted, but finally he was able to get the correct spelling of Fiona's name. It discouraged him a little, because if it took him that long to type five letters, how was he going to text? How long were these text things anyway? He sighed and checked the time in the right hand corner. It was 1 in the afternoon, so hopefully if he started his text now, he would finish before Fiona was getting ready for bed.

The crowds of pedestrians passed him with their shopping bags and frozen yogurt, as he sat there thumbing the buttons to form the message.

hellofionahowareyoudoingiamwellwouldyoustillliketogotoartatthey.

After looking at it he sighed. Having forgotten to use the space key, he was left with one jumble of a word. He would have to start over. Resisting the urge to chuck the phone into the trash can across the street, he started again.

hello fiona how are you doing i am well would you still like to go to art seminar at the y

Pleased with himself, he pressed the send button and leaned back on the bench with a relieved sigh.

888888888888

Fiona sat on her couch, checking her twitter feed on her Mac. Her phone was playing Cult of Personality in the background and she bounced along with the beat. Giggling at her friends' antics, she began to post a reply to her friend Zoey's drunken selfie. As she was halfway through the tweet, the rock song stopped coming from her phone. She looked over and groaned when it was replaced by her annoying ringtone. Placing her hands on the cushions for support, she pushed herself up into a standing position, and shuffled across the room. Why did the outlet have to be all the way in the corner of the living room?

Bending down, she picked up her galaxy and smiled at the name coming across the screen. She pressed the green phone icon and pressed the phone to her ear.

"Hi Sherm! Long time no talk!" she said excitedly.

"Hello Fiona! It's been too long. Just calling to see how everything is going. I trust your internship is satisfactory." the male voice replied.

Fiona twirled a strand of her hair between her fingers, biting her lip. "It's all right." she sighed. "We both know I've had much better though. The guy can barely tell an opening from a closing!" she laughed. "It's fine though. Just have to get through it, then one more semester, and bam, I'm a lawyer."

"I'm so proud of you hon. There's no doubt you'll be a complete success. Might even give me a run for my money." he joked.

"I doubt that!" Fiona said between giggles. "You're the top dog Sherm. Always have been."

"Listen there's another reason I called.." he hesitated. "I just want to make sure you're okay with...everything."

"Oh yeah, I'm totally fine. The papers are all set still ...right?" Fiona asked worriedly.

"Oh yes, iron clad. Don't you worry about a thing dear."

Fiona's phone started beeping. "Hey Sherm, I have to go, I'm getting a text."

"All right Fiona, it was so nice talking to you! Don't be a stranger. You can always call and say hi."

"WIll do Sherm, bye." Fiona smiled, pressing the end button.

She clicked on the little mail icon and noticed it was from an unfamiliar number.

hello fiona how are you doing i am well would you still like to go to art seminar at the y

She stared at the message quizically for a few minutes before guessing who it was. She hit reply, and started typing on the virtual keyboard.

Is this Steve?

Setting her phone down on the coffee table, she returned to twitter. Christina had gotten the cutest new dog. The adorable puggle was called Rita.

After ten minutes of scrolling her phone beeped again.

Yes it is.

She giggled. Steve was so cute. Pulling up the website for the ymca she typed up a reply

There's a workshop tomorrow at 1 pm. Does that work for you?

This time the reply was instantaneous.

Yes.

Still giggling, she texted back.

Are we meeting up?

The same reply came back

Yes

Fiona realized that this guy wasn't a big texter. Some people you could go back and forth with for hours, others barely gave you one word answers. Fiona wasn't disappointed though, it just meant hopefully she could talk to him face to face more often. She laid back on the couch, letting out a small squeal. She was so excited to see him. Of course convinced herself she was NOT developing a crush on him, and was just looking forward to having someone new to hang out with. There was no way she was going to go down the relationship road again.

She turned back to her laptop hiding a smile under her hand. She couldn't wait until tomorrow.

A/N *shakes head* Who is Fiona kidding. Crush! I was hoping to get to the workshop this chapter, but you guys have waited long enough for an update. Hope you enjoyed this chapter.