Chapter 4:

With a moan, I blinked my eyes open, to find myself on a table in a poorly lit lab. Under a sheet. Naked? What happened?

As the memories hit, I began to shake? It couldn't have been real, could it? Hallucinations? Well not from the goo, but I was perfectly capable of having some kind of nervous breakdown. Strange how that could be comforting thought.

"Awake again?"

I searched frantically for the source of the new, feminine voice. A teenage girl with blue eyes and carrot-colored hair stood by one of the lab tables. She wore a yellow T-shirt and jean shorts over black leggings. Not a conventional beauty, but cute all the same.

What is wrong with me?! I'd been kidnapped to some covert science lab. I should be planning my escape. Not evaluating the hotness of the girls here. I mean I was naked on a table in a lab… I looked down cautiously at the sheet covering me and my face grew hot. Did she…?

"I didn't do it." She might have been able to read my mind, but I was pretty sure I'd asked that one loud and clear, just non-verbally.

A new voice joined us. "So what now, Red?"

I looked towards it with some trepidation. Nearby stood a teenage boy. A bandana covered his short, scruffy, dark hair and his mouth was short several teeth. He wore ripped jeans and a T-shirt with the logo of what I assumed was some metal band I'd never heard of.

The girl shrugged. "We just need to all stay calm."

I cleared my throat. "So, umm, where are my clothes?"

They looked away nervously.

Eventually the girl answered. "They kind of had to be…destroyed."

I must not have heard her right. "What?"

"You had a dangerous chemical all over them. Sorry, they couldn't be saved."

Oh right. The glowing stuff. "So, uh, is there anything I can wear besides a sheet?"

She looked over at the boy. "Don't you have a change of clothes here?"

He grimaced. "He is not going commando in my jeans."

She shrugged. "Borrow underwear from Mikey."

"What?" The boy sounded incredulous.

"He's got a collection." She smothered a laugh as she clarified.

"What? Why do you know that? Hang on, I don't want to know. Just wait here." He turned to glare at me for a moment. "Better not try anything."

She sighed in exasperation at his words. "I can take care of myself."

He went to what I had assumed was a big metal wall, grabbed a handle and slid it open enough for him to slip through.

The girl smiled at me reassuringly. "So, I'm April and that was Casey." She waited expectantly while a gaped at her. Seeing I needed a little help, she tried again. "And you are?"

"Eli." I answered automatically and without thinking. Dang it! I was the worst secret-agent ever.

"Well, Eli. Can you tell me what you were doing when you got exposed to the chemical?"

I shook my head and she sighed.

"Where am I?"

She thought be before answering me. "My secret hideout. Emphasis on secret."

Ok. I guess I deserved that since I couldn't tell her what I was up to. Still, since I was stuck here, it was less than reassuring.

Casey returned with clothes in his arms and some enormous and questionable looking underwear dangling off of what looked like a handheld pitchfork. Offensive as the offering appeared, it was that or the sheet and I wasn't in the mood for a toga party.

April took some rubber bands out a jar on the desk and handed them to me, so I could adjust the underwear to not fall off my hips. They turned to give me a little privacy while I dressed, but were clearly unwilling to leave me alone.

A loud angry voice boomed from beyond the door. "Where's my freakin' sai? Mikey!"

"I didn't do it!"

A couple more voices made shushing sounds.

Casey looked down at his metal pitchfork. "Uh, gotta go."

Before I could ask, he was out of the room.

April was trying hard not to laugh. "Oh, he's in so much trouble."

Seeing me watching her, she quickly tried to compose herself. Apparently, there were more people here than just her and Casey. Well, obviously, since they'd mentioned borrowing the underwear from Mikey. Exactly how many people were here anyway?

"So, who was that?"

She shrugged. "Just some of the other guys."

Not going to tell me. Fine. I was just alone here, helpless and apparently surrounded by mysterious strangers. Everything wass great. I wish Kade were with me.

Kade! Oh no! What happened to him? Was he really dead? How long had it been? I should probably call this in.

"Umm, I had a cell phone…"

"It's being decontaminated in the…uh…decontaminator."

"Uh huh. So when do you think I can have it back?"

"Probably when you leave." Ok. At some point in the future I would be able to leave. That was comforting. Vague, but comforting.

"Ok then. When do you think that will be?"

"I don't know. It's not really up to me."

"But isn't this your secret lab in your secret hideout?"

She looked around nervously. "Uh, yeah. Of course it is. I've got my microscope and my test tubes and…" She looked at another large piece of miscellaneous scientific equipment, obviously struggling to generate a name for it.

Someone groaned from the other side of the door and whispered "mass spectrometer."

"And yeah, my mass spectrometer. But we need to make sure…" She thought for a moment.

"Side effects." The same whispered voice jumped in again. It sounded kind of familiar.

"Right. That you aren't going to have any side effects from your exposure. I'm going to play it by ear for how long that will be, so sit tight."

I knew for a fact that there would be no side effects. What was going to happen to me when they discovered that and started doing experiments to figure out why? There was no way I believed this was her lab. So someone was out there, waiting to turn me into a guinea pig. Not gonna happen.

She was still looking around as though some of the equipment might produce a better explanation for my involuntary captivity. This was my moment. Without giving any advance warning, I dashed for the door, barely noting her yelp of surprise. Yes! I made it!

Then I collided with something big and solid on the other side, landing hard on my butt. Wincing, I looked up and gasped. I wanted to scream but there was nothing in my throat to come out.

A giant, green-eyed turtle in a red mask glared down at me. I kind of understood that he wasn't actually taller than I was, but he was broad, built and very tough-looking. I could see a lightning shaped crack in his, uh front shell? Plastron! That's what it was called. Why did I even know that? High school biology? Of all the useless crap! Why couldn't my mind give me something practical, like how to get away from this thing?

"Dude…is he still breathing?"

My eyes sought the new voice. It came from a smaller, blue-eyed man-turtle with an orange bandana and…were those freckles? My vision began to get hazy again.

The big one in front of me snorted. "Is he gonna faint again? Really?"

Somehow his words hit my pride and I fought to get a hold of myself. Not again. Not again. In a last ditch effort not to pass out for the third time in…however long it had been, I slapped myself across the face. It worked. The pain in my cheek gave me something to focus on besides my situation and I clung to it like a drowning man who'd just been thrown a life preserver.

"See I told you that worked."

I turned to see the source of the third new voice, noting it came from a medium-sized turtle in blue mask.

The red one huffed. "No it doesn't. There's obviously something wrong with him. You can't count him as normal."

How many of them were there?

Orange spoke again. "So the underwear worked out then?"

I felt my body nod of its own volition.

He looked smug. "And you guys thought my collection was weird."

"It is!" Three voices responded. Three? Who was…

Before I could turn to look, a piercing screech emanated from a makeshift cage behind orange and I saw the giant sparrow-monster that ate Kade.

With a shriek that was shrill even to my own ears I leapt up and back, momentarily weightless, before someone caught me. We tottered, off balance for a moment, before I could feel him stabilize.

Then orange stepped forward and poked him with what looked like a pair of leather-covered, wooden cylinders, connected by a chain. Equilibrium lost, we went down. Hard.

Someone groaned underneath me as I gasped to recover from having the wind knocked out of me. When I looked down and saw who had caught me, I panicked.

"Ah! Mad scientist turtle!" I scrambled back off of him while the others burst out laughing.

Was he blushing? Could turtles blush?

"I'm not a mad scientist!"

Orange guffawed so hard that he actually fell over. "You totally are bro."

Red wiped away tears as he fought to suck in much needed breaths between chortles. "Oh man, he totally got you."

Blue was trying to contain himself and failing. "Mad…scientist…turtle" he said between snorts of suppressed laughter.

I actually felt kind of bad for purple now.

April came out of the lab and started to help him back to his feet. "Are you ok, Donnie?"

At her touch, he blushed again and gave her a big gap toothed smile before remembering his situation and looking even more humiliated than before. If I didn't know any better, I'd say he was a bit infatuated with her. But that was crazy, right? He was a turtle. Shouldn't he be into…other turtles? Were there other turtles?

"Enough!"

My musings and the laughter were abruptly cut short by a voice from the other side of the room carrying an undeniable tone of authority. Boss man, maybe? He sounded foreign, like Mr. Miyagi.

Boss man approached and the moment I was able to see him, I shrieked again, hitting octaves I would not have previously thought possible, while scrabbling back towards the lab door. He was a giant, bipedal rat with a walking stick, wearing a robe. Not gonna faint. Not gonna faint.

Orange patted me affectionately on the shoulder. "Don't freak out man."

"Freak out? Who's freaking out? I'm not freaking out. Are you freaking out? No one's freaking out." I could hear myself babbling in a panicked, screechy tone of voice, but was powerless to stop it.

He was looking concerned. "Do you need to slap yourself again?"

I clamped my mouth shut and shook my head. So much for grace under pressure. I was the worst secret-agent ever. Why did they even send me on missions?

I knew why. This was Kade's mission and I was just in the tool kit. Remembering that I was more equipment than agent was not helping me keep my cool.

The rat looked at purple, wait Donnie. April had called him Donnie. "I thought you were going to keep them sedated while they were here?"

Donnie sighed. "I was, but someone…" He glared at orange. "…has been messing in my lab and now I can't find anything."

The rat turned its gaze to orange.

"Don't look at me! It was all Ice Cream Kitty's idea! She knows where Donnie's stuff is."

Ice Cream Kitty? I chose not to think too much about that.

Donnie groaned as his face falls into his hands. The rat banged his cane on the floor and all four and April jumped to attention.

"Michelangelo."

Orange cringed. "Hai Sensei."

Was that another language?

"We have already discussed the rules regarding you playing in Donatello's lab." Donatello? Oh. Donnie must be a nickname. He was almost normal for a minute there. "Your usual video game time will be spent conditioning with Raphael for the next week. You will do exactly as he says."

Orange, or I suppose Michelangelo, sank to the ground moaning. "No, Sensei please."

Red cracked his neck. "This is gonna be fun." I guess he was Raphael.

The rat eyed Michelangelo. "If you prefer, you could spend it in meditation with Leonardo." Blue sighed in displeasure. He must be Leonardo. "Leonardo, you may use my cane to keep your brother focused during meditation."

"You know, I think I'll stick with Raph."

The rat smiled. "As you wish."

Wow, he seemed almost parental in the way he was handling this and the turtles seemed kind of like…kids. I mean not little kids, but they reminded me a bit of the underclassmen at my old high school before…well before everything went down the tubes.

The rat returned his attention to me, but was speaking to the group. "It seems we will have a guest for a time. Perhaps he would he less…upset if we introduced ourselves."

April approached. "He already knows me and Casey."

She gestured towards the couch where Casey had been lounging this whole time, amusing himself by watching my misfortune. I guess I shouldn't be too bitter. If it weren't for him, I would be enduring this with a sheet wrapped around my waist.

Freckles, or I suppose Michelangelo, seemed to have recovered from the announcement of his punishment and perked up. "I'm Mikey."

Oh yeah. The collector.

"I'm Donnie. Not mad-scientist turtle." I winced and nodded as Donatello corrected me while introducing himself.

The sturdy tough one crossed his arms threateningly in front of his chest. "I'm Raph."

It looked like they all preferred nicknames. Honestly, I would too. That meant the blue one probably went by…

"I'm Leo and this is Master Splinter."

The rat nodded to me. Master? Did he own them? Wait, he seemed like he was straight out of a kung-fu movie. Didn't super-awesome karate people get called master? Maybe that was it?

It seemed like they were waiting for something. Oh right. My name. "Uh, I'm Eli. Good to meet you, I hope."

Mikey hugged me and I had to fight not to faint again. "Of course it is. We are gonna be best friends forever. BFF!"

Everyone else groaned.

Leo stepped in. "I think you should give him some space Mikey. He's still getting used to us."

"Oh right." He let me go and I sank to the floor again. This was embarrassing. Although, you'd think I'd be used to that by now.

I looked back at the giant sparrow. "So, about the monster bird…?"

Mikey answered before anyone could respond. "I'm calling it 'The Sparrinator'."

I was not calling it that. "Right…so what's up with that?"

They all looked at each other.

Leo seemed to be the spokesperson among them. "Actually, we were kind hoping you'd tell us. We found it attacking you."

I looked away. "I don't know where it came from, but I think it ate Kade."

"Kade?"

"He's my…friend, I guess."

"And why were you and your friend fighting the Foot?"

I looked at Leo blankly.

"The Foot? Was there another monster I didn't see?"

"The robo-ninjas dude. They're the Foot clan." Mikey jumped in to help me out.

"Oh. I didn't know they had a name. I called them black-pajama robots."

Apparently everyone found that hilarious. Even the rat, I mean Master Splinter, smiled.

Leo was the first to get a hold of himself. "That's good. Have to remember that. Anyway, why were you fighting them?"

I almost answered on reflex, but caught myself this time. I might be the worst secret-agent ever, but I was still a secret-agent. I couldn't just tell them about my mission. I hardly knew them.

Master Splinter seemed to sense my feelings. "Hmm, trust can only be earned with trust. Leonardo, perhaps you should tell Eli about our family."

"Hai Sensei."