Chapter 4-

I was starting to get worried. I hadn't seen Kakashi sensei in about a month, and anyone I asked would say they didn't know where he was or 'I'd just missed him'. I think he is avoiding me and the thought didn't settle well with me.

'He is avoiding you.' I heard Kyuubi's voice ring in my head.

'Hush, I don't need you telling me that Kyuubi' I hissed to him, only causing him to snicker.

'Hey, don't tell me to hush, when you know it's true, child.'

I choose to ignore his comment and concentrate on what I was doing. At the moment I was standing on the Hokage monument surveying the area. I had my shadow clones spread throughout the village; I was determined to find my sensei and ask him why it was he was avoiding me.

*_(*)_*

Why was it getting so hard to avoid Naruto now days? Oh right, because the boy has just what seemed like A MILLION shadow clones looking for me a day. Right now is one of those times I regret that he and Kyuubi were able to get semi along like Bee and the Eight tails.

Why couldn't the blonde just lock the beast and his power away in his cage like he enjoyed doing a few years ago? That would make my life a lot easier.

I mean it isn't as though not seeing the young man didn't have an effect on me either. I felt saddened and dare I say, lonely. Never had I felt like this before when I wasn't around the blonde haired man.

I felt as though I was emptied and left to walk around expected to live on as a person 'should'. Damn people and their expectations. I would tell them all to go shove a big one, but sadly Tsunade does strike some fear into me, enough to get me to move from my house anymore.

I was also a lot more irritable. I can barely stand the sight of people, with their happy chatter and them going on with their life how they want because of the thing we subject ourselves to. What they put Naruto through, and how hypocritical they are, to now shower him with love.

Dammit Kakashi stop it! You live for these people's happiness; you fight and have spilled both your blood and others for your people. Clam down it isn't their fault that your life is shit.

I pushed out another heavy breathe and shoved my hand through my already disheveled and abused hair. I couldn't sit still, I couldn't sleep, I could barely eat, and I couldn't continuously look at one thing for too long before switching my attention on something else.

"Wow, how the mighty have fallen." I heard a mocking voice call behind me. I turned, startled, to see Shikaku, Inoichi and Choza all standing behind me with half amused half concerned faces.

"Hello you three," I ground out trying to calm myself.

"Kakashi, I cannot believe just how out of sorts Naruto has you." Inoichi commented.

"Well not everyone can keep up appearances forever Inoichi" I growled.

"It appears that what Guy has told us about your irritability is true." Shikaku said, raising an eyebrow.

"Kakashi, you are usually a very calm and diffused person. You always keep yourself distanced so I know you aren't going to tell us anything, but this is disconcerting." Inoichi said.

"What is? That I am actually human and I can feel irritation too Inoichi?" I shot a glare in their direction.

"Kakashi enough." Choza's deep voice resonated through my hiding spot in a clearing near the Hokage tower. My attention swung to him as I looked at him.

"If this is how you are reacting now, imagine how unhappy you are gonna be later. After you leave. Just tell Tsunade that this is one mission you can't complete." He reasoned.

"It isn't that kind of mission Choza. I can't back out now; I had a chance to decline this mission when Lady Hokage asked me to do it. I am protecting Naruto this way. Who do you think would have been the next choice? Everyone else have partners. Of the prospective men. Ino and Shikamaru are together, Kiba is in love with Hinata, Sasuke and Sakura, Choji has TenTen, Neji is a branch family and won't be allowed, Shino is the only heir to his family and also won't be allowed, and Lee and Guy are together. The only one left is Naruto and I will not allow him to sacrifice himself AGAIN!" I almost yelled out in irritation.

All three men were left in shock at my never seen behavior. I shook my head furiously and Shunshin-ed away.

My feelings for the blonde ran deeper than anyone-including myself- thought. I wouldn't allow him to be unhappy for the rest of his life, even if that meant that I had to be. When was it that my love for Naruto started? When had it evolved into something that brought out a side of me that I hadn't even known existed?

*_(flash*back)_*

I held the small figure in my arms as the rain poured down upon us. Pakkun had already left us and I was heading back to the village.

I had found the blond laying on the ground in front of the first Hokage's feet at the Valley of the End. The boy was beaten badly and he was barely holding on to consciousness as I carried him back to the village.

His clear blue eyes fluttered up at me as we moved through the trees.

"Kakashi sens-sei?" He asked as he tried focusing on my masked face.

"Hello there Naruto," I said smiling down at him, glad that he was mostly alright.

"Where's Sasuke?" he asked softly. I almost wasn't able to hear him over the pounding of the rain.

"He left Naruto." I told him softly as I stopped, and looked down at the blond. His lower lip trembled and his eyes held great pain.

I remember the feeling of wanting to remove that pain from his life forever.

"Kakashi, we can't leave him!" He said frantically. He squirmed in my arms and I was forced to set him down on the ground, even though he could barely stand.

"Naruto, he-"

"No! Kashi! No." he tried to move past me. He only was able to move past me because of the disbelief that he called me 'Kashi'. He stumbled on a few feet before he fell to the floor. He tried getting up again, but his arms trembled under his weight and his legs as well, could no longer support him.

Why? Why Naruto? Why try to go so far for someone who has hurt you so badly?

"Naruto please stop, before I am forced to stop you." I told him, now that I was able over come the disbelief.

"But, Sasuke! I have-"

"Why Naruto?" I cut him off trying to get him to see that this was pointless.

"Sasuke left. He is long gone by now. I don't know how long you were laying there before I found you." I reasoned.

"Because he is my friend! I won't give up on him Kashi! I have to go after him. I would do the same for you!" He said with such emotion in his eyes.

They were swirling with something unknown to me. What was that making the young boy's eyes seems to glow unnaturally? Was it what he felt for Sasuke? Or was that last statement meant towards me, with more meaning behind it?

My breath caught as I looked at the boy in front of me. He seemed so fragile. Trembling, on his hands and knees in a warm summer's rain. He looked defeated. He seemed broken with hurt. And I couldn't help myself at the time. His beauty caught me off guard.

I reach out to him and tugged him into a deep embrace. His chin rested on my shoulder, as his weak body took a bit to respond. I sure it was at least slightly for a shock as well from the sudden and unexpected movement.

I held him with one hand cradling his head and the other splayed on his lower back, pulling him closer. I wanted to make him feel safe. To remove that defeated, broken look from such a lively being.

Soon enough he nuzzled his face into the crook of my neck and I heard a small sob escape him. His hands clenched the front of my shirt and Jounin jacket as he held onto me. I lifted him up and continued on my way to the village as he either fell unconscious or asleep in my arms.

AN:hey guys sorry this chapter is soooo short but I had so SERIOUS writer's block. But I tried to get to you guys what I had and that is what you just read. You know unless youre like a weirdo that scrolls all the way to the bottom, reads the AN, THEN reads the chapter. But hey, if you do watevs.

Also please excuse any mistakes you may find. I did skim it after I reread it but no one can find all their mistakes. Im in need of a beta, because even though I have a great one! (Thanx Tsuki Is Moon!) she is kinda tied up and actually isnt beta-ing this story. So forgive me!

I think that a new side of Kakashi is good, we always see him so calm and I just really wanted to see him go crazy. And I thought that Naruto's determination to find Kakashi went along well with driving the copy nin crazier since he doesnt want to see Naruto and he keeps looking. I also liked the flas-

Kakashi: Mmm, I really do mean to interrupt you, so Im not sorry but werent you going to tell the readers something?

Naruto:Yea! Dont forget, you've been ranting and ranting at us about it.

Me: O-O

Naruto: You know, how you were gonna tell me what Kakashi's mission is?(devilish grin)

Me:Really? Oh okay well his last mission is to m-

Kakashi: I do believe that you were actually going to tell them about the comments.

Me: OH YEA!

I wanted to thank you all that actually read this story. And all you wonderful people who comment such nice things about it, I luvs ya guys.

Again thank you to all those who read and comment. IT REALLY GIVES ME MOTIVATION TO CONTINUE WRITING IT, EVEN THOUGH I BEAT MYSELF UP FOR HOW SHORT THE CHAPTERS ARE! so ill be updating in two weeks and I promise the chapter will be longer this time for real!

With Craziness,

Akrximay