Disclaimer: I do not own CM, just my OCs.

Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the Pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.

In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the Horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds, and shall find, me unafraid.

It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll.
I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul.

Invictus - William Ernest Henley

When Reid awoke the next morning, Jemma was nowhere to be seen. He assumed that she had woken up, realized her drunken mistake and went home before he could say good morning to her.

Reid heard the rest of the BAU waking up and preparing for the day.

"Oh, no you don't!" Prentiss yelled somewhere in the apartment. "I called dibs on the shower last night, Derek!"

Reid threw the blankets off of himself and stood up and stretched.

"Well, good morning, player." Morgan laughed. "Where's Jemma?"

Reid shrugged. "I was hoping you knew actually."

"Well, we're heading over to the diner soon, wanna come with?" Morgan asked.

"Sure."

"Well good morning darlin's." Jemma smiled at Morgan, Prentiss and Reid as they walked into Steve's.

She looked great, except for the bruise on her jaw. Her long, wild red hair was up in a ponytail and her coffee-coloured eyes look more rested than they had in a long time.

"Morning, Princess." Morgan said.

"Princess?" Jemma laughed. "Who are you callin' Princess?"

She lead them to a table and handed them menus. Then she brought them all a cup of coffee and sat down with them.

"So, what are you guys doing today?" she asked.

"Well, we're going to have a second look at the crime scene," Prentiss said. "See if there's anything we missed."

"And Reid still has some questions to ask you." Morgan reminded them.

Reid blushed and took a sip of his heavily sugared coffee.

"Maybe you should come to the crime scene with us, Jemma." Prentiss suggested. "You knew the Sawyers better than anyone in town, maybe you can see what we're missing."

"No, Emily, I don't think that-" Reid tried to protest.

"Sure, I'll do it." Jemma agreed.

"Are you sure, Jem?" Reid asked. "You really want to see where Amelia was killed?"

"If it helps you guys find the sick bastard who did this to her, sure, I'd do anything."

After Jemma's shift was over that afternoon, Reid, Morgan and Prentiss drove her to the Sawyers' house. It was a large log house that Mr. Sawyer had built himself while he was in college. Jemma knew it just as well as she knew her own, it was her second home. Had been her second home. She wondered for a moment what happens to houses people are murdered in. Surely they must put them on the market at some point, but do the real estate agents tell potential buyers that a family had been murdered there or do they just pretend like nothing every happened?

"Ready Princess?" Morgan asked.

Jemma nodded, took a deep breath then exhaled. Reid, who she had not spoken a word to since the night before offered her his hand, but she pushed him away. Jemma could do this on her own. Reid had this effect on her that made it hard for her to hold herself together when he was around. Part of her wanted to break down in his arms and let him take her far away from all this, but she knew that it was an unrealistic fantasy, he was an FBI agent sent to investigate her best friend's death, not her knight in shining armour.

"Just tell us if anything seems to be out of place, alright Jemma?" Prentiss instructed.

Jemma nodded and opened the door. The first thing she noticed was the blood stains on the living room carpet, but she looked away from them, the BAU had obviously already seen those. She noticed the spare dining room chairs arranged in the living room.

"These shouldn't be here." Jemma said.

"Yeah, we know, that's where he lined them up to kill them." Morgan said.

"Then why are there only five chairs?" Jemma asked. "There were six Sawyers."

The agents exchanged glances.

"Alright, Jemma, notice anything else?" Prentiss asked.

"Well, a bunch of the pictures are turned around." she said, taking a look at the walls and the shelves. "The only ones left up are... they're pictures of Amelia and her two youngest brothers, Jake and Jesse."

"Anything else?" Morgan asked.

Jemma shook her head and moved to the dining room. The odour of rotting food hit her nostrils and she began to gag.

"Oh my god, what is that?" she asked, looking at the four places set on the table.

"I think it was liver and onions." Reid said.

"That's weird." Jemma said.

"Why?" Prentiss asked.

"The Sawyers hated liver. I don't know why it's on the table, they've never ever bought any as far as I know."

"Could the unsub have brought it with him?" Morgan asked.

Jemma went to the kitchen and looked in the garbage can. "There's a receipt here from the General Store." She handed the receipt to Reid.

"It's dated the night of the murders." he said. "Looks like he did bring it with him."

"I'll call Hotch and have him ask the store employees if they remember anyone." Morgan said, taking his cell phone from his pocket.

Jemma looked in Mr. Sawyer's office and then made her way up the stairs. Each of the Sawyer children's bedrooms seemed normal, their beds were slept in, but other than that, everything seemed fine.

The master bedroom at the end of the hallway was a whole different story though. There were two large blood stains on the carpet by the door and the bed was soaked in blood.

"Is this where he..." Jemma trailed off.

Reid nodded and took her hand. Jemma leaned into him and shed several tears. Reid shot Morgan and Prentiss a look that said "I told you so."

"Hey, what's that doing there?" Jemma asked, looking over Reid's shoulder.

He released her and turned to look where she was pointing.

"This shouldn't be here." Jemma said, picking up a ring from the nightstand.

"What is it?" Morgan asked.

"It's Amelia's purity ring." Jemma said. "She never took it off. Not unless... Oh my god. No. No. No way."

"Jemma-" Reid tried to calm her.

"Why didn't you tell me she was raped?" Jemma demanded. "I hate you!"

She ran out of the house and did not look back.

"Jemma, please listen to me." Reid begged her.

"Go away!" Jemma hissed. "I'm working, I don't have time for this."

"But Jemma, please, I-"

"Leave. Now." Jemma said, pointing to the door of the restaurant.

"Jemma, I didn't mean to hurt you!" Reid persisted. "In fact that's exactly why I didn't tell you."

Jemma just shook her head. "Please just leave."

"Jemma-"

"She told you to leave." Shawna said, stepping in. "There's the door, don't let it hit you on the way out."

Reid sighed and gave up. He left the restaurant, turning around just once to see the sad look on Jemma's face.

"Are you sure you don't want a drive?" Shawna asked Jemma as they stepped into the cool night air. She twirled the keys to her brand new Ford Focus in her hand.

Jemma smiled and shook her head. "See ya tomorrow, Shawn."

"See ya, Jemma." she said, getting in her car and driving away.

Jemma waved goodbye to her friend and walked across the parking lot, heading home.

"Hey-" someone said.

Jemma screamed.

"Jem, it's me." Reid said.

"Don't scare me like that!" Jemma said. "And I told you to go away. What part of 'I hate you' don't you understand?"

He looked sad and hurt. "I understand it."

"Then why are you here?"

"I just wanted to apologize." he said. "Can I at least drive you home? You shouldn't be walking with a serial killer on the loose."

Jemma sighed. "Fine."

Reid opened the passenger side door for her. She shot him a resentful look and got in. They drove to her house in silence. When they parked, Reid got out first and opened the door for Jemma.

"Thanks for the drive." she said.

"Um... Jemma?"

"Yeah?"

"Well, I know you hate me now, but I'm still supposed to question you." Reid reminded her.

Jemma sighed. "Fine, but can I at least get out of my work clothes?"

"Yeah, sure."

Jemma lead him into the house. Lizzy was sleeping and Mr. Cavanaugh was nowhere to be seen, but the dogs began to bark.

"Hansel! Gretel! Shut up!" Jemma hissed.

"Sorry, that's probably my fault." Reid said. "Dogs and kids don't like me. The BAU calls it the Reid-effect."

This made Jemma laugh and Reid felt as though there might be a hope that she would forgive him.

She came to her bedroom door and told him to wait in the hallway. She re-emerged moments later in a pair of cut-off denim shorts and a pink plaid shirt. Her hair was down now, a small strand hanging in her face. Reid cautiously tucked it behind her ear, afraid that she might hit him or push him away. She didn't. In fact, she had to fight the urge to hold his hand to her face. She liked how her skin seemed to tingle like the time she had grabbed that electric fence when she was a kid. She liked how her stomach felt as if it were filled with butterflies whenever she looked at him and how her palms sweat whenever he was around.

"You want to go somewhere a little quieter?" Reid asked.

"Yeah, I know just the place." Jemma said, grabbing his hand and dragging him outside.

She loved the way his hand felt in hers. His long bony fingers seemed to fit perfectly between hers.

Jemma lead Reid behind the house, past the old, dilapidated barn, through a trail that snaked between the trees and to a small clearing that was cut in two by a creek which widened into a large swimming hole.

Jemma laughed and spun in circles beneath the starlight. Reid laughed at how carefree she seemed to be. She looked almost mystical the way the moonlight hit her dark red hair and creamy white skin. She grabbed his hand again and pulled him down onto the damp grass.

"I think I forgive you." she said seriously, staring into his eyes.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you, Jem." he said. "I just didn't want to hurt you."

"It's alright." she said.

They laid on their backs and looked at the stars. Reid began to name some of the constellations for her.

"And that one there is Cancer." he said, pointing at the sky.

"Cancer." Jemma repeated solemnly. "Funny how it can look so pretty in the sky."

"Jemma..."

"My mother died of cancer." Jemma said.

"I'm sorry." Reid said.

Jemma shrugged. "You've really gotta stop apologizing for things you have no control over. Maybe it would make it mean more when you really do screw up."

She shyly inched closer to Reid, but he did not seem to notice.

"Jemma, I have to ask you about your ex-boyfriend." Reid said, remembering why he was there in the first place.

"Ex-boyfriend?" Jemma said. "I've never had a boyfriend before."

"What? That's not what Sheriff Haggerty said."

Jemma sat up and looked Reid in the eye. "And you take everything that bastard says for the truth?"

"He said that Willie Preston proposed to you, but you declined and he was heartbroken."

Jemma laughed loudly. "Yeah, he proposed to me on our first and only date four years ago in the tenth grade. He was pissed off so he told everyone I was a stuck up bitch."

"Do you think he was angry enough to kill someone?" Reid asked.

"No, why, do you think he killed the Sawyers?" Jemma asked.

"It's a possibility." Reid said. "The unsub-"

"What's an unsub?"

"It means unknown subject." Reid explained. "Anyway, we think he was set off by a rejection like a declined marriage proposal."

"But that was four years ago." Jemma said.

"Four years ago, a family in Slaughterville was killed the exact same way."

"Oh no... It can't be Willie though. He's married now."

"We still have to look into him." Reid said. "Why did you decline?"

"Other than the fact that I was sixteen? He just wanted in my pants."

"But most guys don't propose just to get into a girl's pants, do they?"

Jemma laughed at how awkward Reid sounded. "No, not unless they're wearing one of these." She raised her left hand so he could see and wiggled her ring finger, showing him her purity ring. "You're such an observant profiler."

"I'm usually just looking at your eyes." Reid blushed.

"You're adorable, you know that, right?" Jemma teased.

"So uh... why do you have a purity ring?" Reid asked. "Despite the obvious reasons of course."

"Oh, it's not a religious thing, if that's what you're wondering. Amelia's was a religious choice, I went to church with the Sawyers every Sunday, but mine's for more personal reasons." Jemma said. "I uh... I don't need another reason to be stuck in Morrow Springs, ya know?"

Reid nodded.

"I guess that's why the entire population thinks I'm a stuck up bitch." Jemma shrugged. "I guess that's what you get for not accepting your pathetic fate."

"I don't believe in fate."

"I don't know what I believe in." Jemma sighed. "I thought maybe it was fate when you walked into the diner, but maybe it's just one of those cruel jokes that life plays on people."

"What do you mean?" Reid asked.

"Well, I really like you, but you're going to leave once you find this creep." Jemma explained.

"You can leave with me." Reid offered.

"You and I both know that I can't."

"Well, I'll come visit you whenever I have time off."

Jemma shook her head. "And you expect me to just put my life on hold when that happens? You know I can't do that, Spencer."

"Please just come with me." Reid pleaded, reaching for Jemma hand. "I can help you get into Georgetown and find you a job. You don't have to live with me, we can take it slow if you want. You can bring Lizzy too. Please, Jemma, I can't leave you here to die."

"Spencer, I'm not going to die." Jemma insisted.

"But your father, he could-"

"I've lived like this for four years now, Spencer, I can handle it." she said. "Besides, my brother will be home from Iraq at the end of August. He won't let Dad hurt me."

"Are you sure, Jem?"

"I'm sure." she replied. "Spencer, I really do like you, but I don't think it's right or even realistic for you to just take me away when I only just met you. Can't we just enjoy this while we can?"

Reid had to admit that Jemma was right. He knew that the things he said were ridiculous and illogical. He wasn't even sure why he'd said them. Something about this girl made him flustered and caused his amazing brain to turn to mush. He pulled her back down onto the grass and she rested her head on his chest. She entwined their fingers and he kissed the top of her head, becoming overwhelmed by the floral scent of her perfume.

"Jemma..." he said weakly.

"What Spencer?" she giggled.

"You're just so..."

"I'm so what?" she laughed, rolling over to straddle him. She leaned forward and let her long rad hair fall down around their faces that were inches apart. She planted a quick kiss on his lips.

"B-beautiful." he stuttered.

She kised him again.

"And sweet."

And again.

"How do you do it?" Reid asked.

Jemma kissed him again. "Do what?"

"Your life is so miserable, but no one would ever know it. It's like none of it effects you." Reid said. "You must be hurting so much inside."

"But I'm not." Jemma said. "Those things can only hurt me if I let them and I won't."

"Not even Amelia's death?" Reid asked. "She was your best friend, that must hurt you a bit."

"Yeah, it does, but she wouldn't want it to. She'd tell me to smile, then she'd probably recite Invictus."

Reid laughed. "Invictus? Really?"

Jemma nodded. "It was our favourite."

Reid smiled. "Come here, you unconquerable soul." he said, pulling her down for another kiss, a longer, deeper kiss than they had ever shared.

They laid beneath the stars for awhile longer until Reid remembered that he should get back to town since the rest of the team was probably looking for him. He walked Jemma back to the house, kissed her goodbye then drove away.

Jemma closed and locked the door behind him, her heart fluttering. She went to bed, feeling as if she could fly. She wondered if this was what drugs felt like. She laid in her bed, but could not fall asleep. All she could think about was Reid, the first guy who had ever offered to take her away from Morrow Springs, the first and only guy she would be willing to leave Morrow Springs for.

A/N: Thank you for reading! Wow, this is a lot fluffier than I anticipated. Oh well, action is coming soon. Oh so soon. Prepare yourselves.

Anyway, please review. I hate to have to beg, but I've gotten very few on this story and I'd really like to know what my readers think. If there's something you don't like or something you want more of, write a review, I always take your opinions into consideration. I have anonymous reviews enabled too.

To The Truly Natural Things readers, my deepest sincerest apologies for sucking at updating. I'm just not feeling it right now. I've been trying to write chapter two for days now and nothing seems to feel right. It's just this one chapter I think. I really should have picked up somewhere else, but too late now.

Anyway, I'm off to make my snow day even more productive (yes that mean working on either chapter 5 of Gaze or chapter 2 of Things.) New episode of CM tonight! :)